TheFuddsofElmer

That is amazing! I respect you for your ability to adapt and change. I do not have any medical insurance so I have not been able to meet up with anybody about my depression and anxiety. I will enroll once I get a job that offers lol. Thank you again.

Upward2Enlightenment

You have proved that you can quit. Did you make any changes during that 6 months? It helps to change to a positive lifestyle, sometimes that includes letting go of some friends, often more drinking buddies than friends, I had to let go of some people who didn't support my getting clean and sober. It is also important to learn coping tools so that you can deal with whatever life throws at you in a healthy manner.

Best wishes.

Dee74

I don;t think age matters, or volume. I think you have to really sincerely want change - not only not to drink anymore but also accept that there will be other changes too in the way we socialise, or deal with problems, or even sometimes how we define ourselves.

It's a hard task, b ut not impossible - and there is a ton of support here, and in other places

A good recovery plan is required too:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html

D
.

mav

Don't want to hijack, but thank you. I've never looked at it like this before.

tnman1967

For most people it take a fundamental mental change. You really need to want to quit. Not just because someone else says it or that you have legal problems etc. You actually need to come to a point where you rather stay sober than drink. This will only come when you can honestly say that you don't want to drink and to mean it. This doesn't mean that you won't have cravings or that you won't feel self pity. You will, because we all have an unhealthy attachment to the bottle and we are addicted. But with time, support and mental change, anyone can do it. Good luck.

tomsteve

as dee said, age doesnt matter.
went to an aa speaker meeting a few years ago. the woman was 42 years old and had just celebrated 28 years of sobriety.

went to a meeting a while ago and an 82 year old man was celebrating 1 year sober.

bigsombrero

I had a few seizures, was rushed to the hospital, etc. My friends and family finally told me they thought rehab would be best. I skeptically agreed, and after 48 hours in detox I went to rehab for 24 days. It basically took a month of pure devotion to recovery to make me believe I could really do it.

You really gotta do whatever it takes. You don't just open a jar of sobriety and change your life. It's hard. Like, imagine you want to play professional baseball. You'll need hours and hours in the batting cages and the field before you can even think about stepping into a live game. It's that hard. It's achievable, but you gotta be devoted. Big time. It has to be a singular goal of your life for a while before you can get on easy street.

AdelineRose

Right there are some key things,


First; "You feel terrible taking time off work" This is want I was referring to when I said no excuses allowed. Be honest with yourself, you aren't not going to a detox center because you are worried about taking time off work...you are not going to a detox center because you want to continue drinking instead,

Second: "Attempt to live a normal life": Again be honest with yourself, you aren't trying to just live a normal life, you are trying to live a lie. You keep telling yourself that if others can drink and have a normal life then so can you. Unfortunately that is not how it works, some people can drink and stop and some cannot. You can't change it, once you are in the category of not being able to stop it never goes backwards, you just progressively get worse. Living a normal life would not having alcohol consume your entire life, you are not living a normal life no matter how hard you try to convince yourself.

Also I saw you said above that you have tried smoking weed. That is just substituting it is like an alcoholic stopping drinking but starting to do heroin instead because hey i'm not drinking so i'm "sober". It doesn't work like that.

Have you considered therapy at least to help sort all these thoughts out? Even if you don't have insurance there are places that you can pay on a sliding scale, there are resources where you can find free counseling just like free detox and free rehab. There are ALWAYS options out there, we just have to reach out and look for them, I always used to tell myself if I could be in any random state in the US on vacation and if I ran out of heroin I was ALWAYS able to find someone to sell me some. Put the energy you put into drinking into your recovery, that is one thing I did. If I could ALWAYS find heroin, then why do I pretend to be so helpless when it came to finding the resources I needed for recovery. It is a mind set change but it makes everything make a lot more sense in the end

TheFuddsofElmer

Thank you all again. So I had a rough weekend. Seriously considering a detox center but like I said, I would feel terrible calling off work. Its hard to explain the situation but if I took time off, there might be serious consequences for the business . I'll update this thread and let you guys know what's up.

Nonsensical

Are there no serious consequences to continued drug use?

TheFuddsofElmer

This is true. I guess I'm afraid. I sometimes think that it would be best to disappear. I've said and done things to the people I love that some would consider unforgivable. I feel terrible.

Dee74

Nons beat me to it - if you do nothing about this but more drinking sooner or later you'll find it will not only affect you but the business you work for as well.

What did you do to try and not drink on the weekend, FOE?

D

Scared1234

One day you will wake up and realize you TRULY want sobriety over liquor. I know that doesn't make sense...but one day you'll open yours eyes in the am and the thought of waking up every morning energetic happy and alive trumps any buzz you get from that bottle. I realized the bottles buzz was temporary... True happiness in sobriety feels SO much better. My self worth is back

MythOfSisyphus

Your AV will always feed you excuses for why now "isn't a good time" to quit or do rehab. But if you wind up hitting rock bottom, like going to jail or winding up in the hospital, the timing might be worse yet. Better to do it at a time of your choosing instead of letting fate/luck force your hand.

Nonsensical

That's just one of an addiction's tricks to control us, but they all revolve around making us feel.

I feel good when I drink. I feel better when I drink. I don't feel good unless I drink. I feel bad when I don't drink. I feel afraid not to drink.

I feel compelled to act on my drinking feelings.

Strangely, I have all kinds of other feelings that I don't feel as compelled to act on. I feel like yelling at my boss. I feel like propositioning the hot babe even though we are both married. I feel like running idiot drivers off the road.

I can easily ignore those emotions, but drinking was special.

That's addiction.

Best of Luck on Your Journey.

yinzer

Most of us have been there. And what good would staying high or drunk do? The best thing you can do for the people you love is get sober. You'd be surprised what is forgiveable. Read some of the stories on here.

thomas11

You mentioned fear. Fear can cause you to continue to drink, but you can use that same fear to keep you from drinking.

Its been said on this site before, "I have another bender in me, but I don't know if I have another recovery".

Dee74

Hows it going Fudds?

D

thomas11

bump

Berrybean

They would be more than welcoming. If you're worried, contacted most nations have a helpline (I contacted online for reassurance before I made it to my first meeting). Everyone in any meeting will remember that their first meeting, and know how anxiety making it can be. I have never, ever felt as welcome anywhere else I've been. There is no need to speak in front on anyone at any meetings, although there is always an opportunity to offer your first name as a newcomer or visitor from another area so that people can welcome you and get to know you.

There have been plenty of young people who have accessed AA. I believe that one of the speakers I listened to on a recording (Debbie someone I think) went to there initially as a teenager of about 16. That was a long time ago, and I can't believe there haven't been more since then.

I wish you lots of luck in getting to your first meeting and making the most of the support available there for you. I sure wish I'd got my drinking sorted out at that age.