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Old 05-04-2015, 04:12 AM
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Double post.
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Old 05-04-2015, 04:13 AM
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All of you are correct, I keep messing myself up. This is so stupid its crazy and dumb. But I think I will get a sponsor and start in AA again, I've talked bad about them before but they are good folks
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Old 05-04-2015, 04:16 AM
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Oh man so humbling a man that drank for 20 plus years daily is telling me I can get sober. And you know its enough to make a man cry ( sorry the beer is still talking some) but when I am placed in those positions its scary. Really is, I made a poor choice, and keep making poor choices, but i want to get sober. Time to make that decision, I just have to.
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Old 05-04-2015, 04:17 AM
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Originally Posted by Thatdeliveryguy View Post
The coverage change on me, the Salvation Army, yes that scares me, they told me they would take me and have beds, but 6 months, yeah thats a long time in my mind.

Hi.
TIME is a word alcoholics hate. But what are the options? A wet brain, being crippled as a result of our drinking, killing/maiming people while DUI, perhaps the worst in a lot of peoples eyes is being an undisciplined immature power of example for our children if we have any.

At meetings over a lot of years so many have said they never wanted to follow their parent footsteps drinking.

Six months is not much to give for a good shot of sanity and feeling good about ourselves and what we can accomplish.
Try to treat yourself to a treat, a good life!

BE WELL
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Old 05-04-2015, 04:19 AM
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If you have the dream, and you're prepared to put your shoulder to the wheel....you can do anything J.

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Old 05-04-2015, 04:22 AM
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My Australian friend is so wise, crikey, I need to check myself and get sober.
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Old 05-04-2015, 04:25 AM
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Do it for you - not me, Jeremy.
Think about it today anyway - what can you do?

See you my tomorrow
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Old 05-04-2015, 04:26 AM
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TDG - did you really not have your mind made up to relapse at the point when you agreed to host your drinking buddy? I realize that alcohol is much more socially acceptable than heroin, but could you imagine if I said I was going to invite an old using buddy over expecting him to shoot up a couple bags at my kitchen table? There would be only one reason to put myself in that situation - a pre-planned relapse.

What is wrong with going to a salvation army for 6 months? I would love to have 6 months to focus on myself. It sounds like an extended vacation to me. Are they going to make you bust rocks with a sledgehammer all day or something?
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Old 05-04-2015, 04:29 AM
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Saw this coming a mile away - your pattern is so predictable. Hopefully at some point you'll figure it out too and stop this insanity.
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Old 05-04-2015, 04:31 AM
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Opiophobe fear, and stupidity is what holds me back. I must say I am schizophrenic, I am not normal I am an introvert and hide in my house. The internet is my outlet, if you met me you'd think me weird.

I had him over because he is a good friend and a good man sadly he's into drinking and smoking, However, he's one of the few people that treats me like a normal person. Most don't, really you'd have to meet me to realize I have serious issues.

It was dumb, I am giving serious thought to the Salvation Army, but as most here know I probably won't go. I am not a lost cause though.
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Old 05-04-2015, 04:32 AM
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heartafire I am predictable, I know my own cycles, what can I say, still here, still want to be sober.
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Old 05-04-2015, 04:43 AM
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Originally Posted by Thatdeliveryguy View Post
I am not normal I am an introvert and hide in my house. The internet is my outlet, if you met me you'd think me weird.

It was dumb, I am giving serious thought to the Salvation Army, but as most here know I probably won't go. I am not a lost cause though.

Hi.
A very common characteristic of alcoholics is isolation which is a huge relapse trigger for us.

I sure hope youíre not a lost cause but what do you think the future holds if your past record is continued?
We canít fix you, only you can.

BE WELL
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Old 05-04-2015, 04:50 AM
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I know if alcohol was put in front of my face I would have a really hard time turning it down. That is how I messed up so many times before. I avoid those situations for now. I do not allow alcohol around me, and I do not go anywhere that their may be alcohol. Until I am stronger, and further into my sobriety it is what I have to do. For now maybe you should make it clear to your buddy not to bring alcohol over to your home.
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Old 05-04-2015, 05:01 AM
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TDG, have you ever considered medication?
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Old 05-04-2015, 05:02 AM
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I am on lots of medication, Olanzapine for the voices, vistrial for the anxiety, lisonpril for high blood pressure , omprezole for heart burn and a lot of other things. but thats a sample.
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Old 05-04-2015, 05:56 AM
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Originally Posted by Thatdeliveryguy View Post
I am on lots of medication, Olanzapine for the voices, vistrial for the anxiety, lisonpril for high blood pressure , omprezole for heart burn and a lot of other things. but thats a sample.
You have an opportunity to change your life in just six months, that's nothing in the grand scheme of things! Go for the six months if you can. Other things haven't worked for you and there's no shame in that. This could be life changing.
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Old 05-04-2015, 06:25 AM
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Originally Posted by Thatdeliveryguy View Post
but will report to outpatient today and ask for advice.
You have been asking for and getting advice for well over a year here on SR TDG. And you have gotten a overwhelming amount of it, good advice at that. You've also gotten lots of good advice from your wife, social workers, doctors, ER medics, judges and even your daughter I would imagine.

The problem is that you don't heed any of it. You simply ignore it and try to do things your way. Your way doesn't work - that's been proven over and over and over.

You need intensive treatment, and until you get it nothing will change. I think i've probably said that at least a dozen times to you, probably more - and countless others have as well. I will keep saying it too, and so will others here, until you get it.
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Old 05-04-2015, 06:42 AM
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Originally Posted by Thatdeliveryguy View Post
We were drinking friends, it was actually a very poor decision. I knew why they were coming, and knew what they would bring. The wife actually got mad at me and told me not too, I didn't listen.
Here's a thought - Affix a picture of your daughter to the inside of the front door. Then when the insane thoughts occur to allow a drinking buddy come over maybe you'll remember one reason why you quit before you open the door!

In fact, maybe make up 100 pics of your daughter putting them on your mirror, fridge, inside the car - etc........with a simple phrase =
Think, think, think.........

For me by the 3rd "think" I could remember what I was suppose to do or how I was suppose to behave in sobriety.

Good Luck!
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Old 05-04-2015, 06:52 AM
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It's been a lot longer than six months that you have been on this board, wondering how to change things. I understand wanting to have a friend there, that treats you like a normal human being. Maybe you can just tell said friend that you cannot drink/smoke, but would still enjoy his company?

You need inpatient my friend. In the grand scheme, six months is nothing compared to what you would have to gain.
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Old 05-04-2015, 06:59 AM
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I continue to wish you the courage to allow yourself to heal.

Olanzapine has a monthly injection for schizophrenia (as does risperidone and aripriprazole). These solutions may make it easier for you to consistently have meds in your system.
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