Gonnachange

I saw your post in that other thread; some good advice was given. I'm hanging in there, but making sure I keep my guard up.

Congrats on 16 days.

carlingford

Thanks Gonnachange finished work now and swimming after work now hoping it helps with my sleep issue, take care and keep that guard up bye from Saudi Arabia

Gonnachange

Enjoy the swim.

This Afternoon...

....I was feeling some urges and surfed them for a while. I then went on a short run that helped, but not as much as I hoped for. Drinking lots of water right now.

carlingford

YES felt good after swim Gonnachange thanks, just skyed family and off to bed now, its all about mind over matter really, today was best felt in long time but know it will be a lifetime struggle and need to be here for my family and I dont want to die, thats the long and short sobering bit about this disease, its a killer that stalks for life, well thats my take on it its either the drink and death or sobriety and life which to me is joy to be able to provide for my family and be happy. stay strong Gonnachange dont let it catch you out, its a killer, talk soon night night

Gonnachange

I've been addicted to exercise for decades and try to do something everyday. Ideally it's lifting three times per week and running/cycling the other four. IMHO, the benefits spill to all facets of my life and I make a big effort to ensure that nothing, including my drinking, stops me from whatever activity is scheduled for the day. Unfortunately, lately I have noticed that the amount of times I'm going to the gym not at my best is increasing. This was a big wake up call for me; I knew my solitary drinking was increasing and there was now evidence that it was having a detrimental effect. Some searching led me to SR and I joined one week ago. I have found it to be a fabulous resource as I work toward my goal of not letting this drug steal my plans for a long, healthy, and happy life where I can continue to enjoy my pursuits and family with a passion.

Gonnachange

Riding another wave. Working, reading SR, and drinking water. This one will not bring me down, but it's not been pretty. I really wish my wife, who is currently at the gym, was home so I could spend time with her and get past this. Head games. Less than 30 minutes until it's 42 hours since my last drink.

Not sure if this is the proper SR way to post about daily struggles so I apologize if I'm mucking up the bandwidth if there is a more appropriate manner.

Hevyn

That's what we're here for - to listen and help each other as we go through the challenging times. You're learning a lot about yourself Gonnachange.

Gonnachange

Thanks for the affirmation. I'm new to the process and to SR so because of the latter I'm sensitive to not following the protocol and because of the former I'm not educated enough to give much specific advice to others. The protocol thing doesn't bother me, but I would absolutely prefer to be more balanced when it comes to giving and receiving advice and support. I imagine that will come in time so for now I have to be content with the imbalance and being very selective in what I post to others.

Dee74

Congrats on your progress Gonnachange

D

feeling-good

Gonnachange

Welcome aboard! I read most of this thread with interest.... I now have 16 + months sobriety but I remember the early days of previous attempts.... it's good to be reminded of the feelings and thoughts and so I thank you very much for this.

I really hope that things go well for you and so my best thoughts and wishes go out to you

Gonnachange

Thanks Dee. I truly appreciate you checking up on me.

Tonight

Home From College Son (HFCS) will be eating with us; not sure what his evening plans are. At 9 I'm going to watch the NBA finals, most likely alone; HFCS will probably be going out and my wife has no interest. A trigger situation. In addition to not wanting to have to reset the clock, currently at 43 hours, my additional motivation to not drink alone is that I'll be deadlifting tomorrow AM and I need to be on my game. "A" game, that is.

Thanks to all who come here and comment; it's very meaningful.

feeling-good

Oooo... remember that horrible feeling of deadlifting with a hangover?? Well, also remember that fantastic feeling of deadlifting with a well rested and completely sober body!! It is absolutely worth having the second option

Dee74

You could always record the NBA finals and watch them later if you thought that watching them alone might trigger you Gonnachange?

D

Gonnachange

Totally agree! I love deads, but they always kick my butt. I guess that's why I love them. :-) When I'm not at my best somehow the weights are glued to the floor. LOL!

Thanks for the suggestion, but I'm going to watch the game tonight so I get the real time result. As for why, firstly I so rarely watch tv we don't have anyway of recording, as far as I know, the game. Secondly, even if we did, which I will confirm with my son, no matter when I watch the game it will be alone. Lastly, if I'm going to conquer my problem I'm going to have to deal with situations like this and I'm mentally gearing up for the "test".

Thanks to both of you for posting. Time to get dinner on the table.

Gonnachange

Passed another "test" last night while watching the basketball game. Not without some urges along the way, but I waited them out.

GracieLou

Good Job! Let them rise and fall without holding on to them.

Hang in there and keep on keeping on!

Gonnachange

Thanks GracieLou. Got through yesterday and am up to 60 hours since the last drink I had on Sunday night. I'm leaving for the gym so 61 is going to happen. I'll deal with the afternoon hours when I get back.

Gonnachange

Tough afternoon, but I'm hanging in there. On a positive note, I registered for a half and a full marathon that will take place this fall. For a variety of reasons I have not done any endurance work since last fall and am looking forward to the getting back to the mindset that has taken me over so many finish lines. The training isn't fun, but it helps keep me in line; knowing that I have a 15 mile training run at 6 AM Saturday morning goes a long way in making sure that I'm not doing anything stupid the night before.

carlingford

Going good Gonnachange well done, good you are keeping busy with marathon. I think I overdid my swimming last night as bones aching this morning, I am new to this exercise stuff, will take it easier in future.. lol

Gonnachange

Thanks Carlingford and all others who have read here. Yeah, the muscle soreness comes with starting to exercise again. FYI, most people find the second day is the worst. The nice part is that it goes away and it is not an injury, so as long as you can deal with the uncomfortableness you can continue to exercise.

I See Hope

Between the empowerment that I've gotten from SR and my decision to sign up for the fall races I'm in a much different and better mental place than I was just a week ago. I know I have a long way to go to achieve both my running and drinking (or non drinking)goals, but I've started and that by itself is a positive.

No urges yet today, but I'm not a morning drinker so it's not unusual. Hour by hour again today; it's taking a lot of mental capacity, but seems to be working.