my friend is back. I missed him or her.

Old 05-10-2014, 12:23 PM
  # 61 (permalink)  
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It's cool to be honest.

But maybe you don't realize your words may have influence on others.

People on the verge of relapsing can be affected by it.

Not that you care, clearly.
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Old 05-10-2014, 12:28 PM
  # 62 (permalink)  
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whosoever is deceived thereby is not wise

Originally Posted by Hevyn View Post

It was only 2 weeks ago that you were so thankful to be sober again.
I remember the battle with the liquid devil
wish that I would have known about this site back then
so very grateful that I have it TODAY

Clearly, there are many different meanings of the word "wine" in the Bible; however, Proverb 20:1 plainly condemns intoxicating beverages ... "Wine is a mocker, strong drink is raging: and whosoever is deceived thereby is not wise." In the April 24, 1965 issue of Christianity Today, the article, on page 25 says, "People must be informed that the use of alcohol is not unlike Russian roulette: every tenth person becomes automatically hooked. the only solution is total abstinence." These statistics are supported by the American Medical Association.
taken from goggling -- Liquid Devil
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Old 05-10-2014, 12:29 PM
  # 63 (permalink)  
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Do you know who are you ? Do you know why you are alone? Do you know why you cry for help and then turn away from those who stretch out their hand? You will never understand, you will never grow if you keep drinking. The fault is not within the stars, but within ourselves. You need an epiphany my friend, not the dumb smothering blanket of alcohol. I wish you well.
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Old 05-10-2014, 12:34 PM
  # 64 (permalink)  
pray for strength
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Originally Posted by 2muchpain View Post
Why would my comments upset people? I just don't get it. I must be missing something.
Yeah, I do not want to feed into this thread any longer but just need to say (and I speak for myself):

Posting about actively drinking with your buddy alcohol and then taking off feels like an unnecessary 'hit and run' - a complete waste of headspace for those who chose to read. Then posting again and not sticking around, once again, for a little bit of healthy debate among fairly supportive friends (which almost always benefits the giver and the taker) is just insult to injury for all those committed to actively working through things.

Taking off and trolling around, well, generally expresses a complete lack of empathy.

Alright, over it and moving on.
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Old 05-10-2014, 12:45 PM
  # 65 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by 2muchpain View Post
Not trying to kid anybody!!!! Maybe I didn't make myself clear. Clearly I have a problem, but other than that, I am doing fine with everything else. What I meant was that the week went great, work went well, went to the gym six times, got a lot of stuff done. I'm not going to say that my life sucks and nothing is going well because that wouldn't be true.
Yet, you picked up the first drink there is no saying where it will lead you.

Not a very helpful post. If you are gonna glamorize the drink , I don't feel this was the place to do that.
You may have triggered a lot of people by your original post. Yes others have relapsed but they don't
post how wonderful it is to have their best friend back.But obviously you posted your original post under
the influence so I am not surprised by your lack of tact.
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Old 05-10-2014, 12:52 PM
  # 66 (permalink)  
Keeping it simple!
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Okay this is a good thread to get a good grasp on what our "friend" really does for us.

I encourage you and newbies to take a look at this thread and to also add their goodbye letter to it as well when you are ready 2muchpain.

Alcohol is not really our friend and some of these letters are quite powerful and just shows how powerful this stuff really is in our minds.

At the end of the day I could only quit when I wanted to be sober more than I wanted to be drunk.
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Old 05-10-2014, 02:55 PM
  # 67 (permalink)  
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2much, if the members here at SR didn't care about you I don't think their would be 4 pages of replies. I think the different tones in the replies all reflect how your post brought back memories of our last drink. I know for me that even after a year of sobriety I still have the end of my drinking days fresh in my memory. Reading your OP just reminds me how easy it could be to find myself at home with a case of beer saying oh well, this will just be a temporary thing. The last time I told myself that, the temporary thing lasted for 8 years. There is no guarantee that this temporary thing will end up being temporary.

I think we all understand the struggle to stay sober, as we alcoholics are really good at what we do...drink. And our AV is very good at what it does, convincing us that it will be a temporary thing. No big deal says the AV. I blew off long-term sobriety 2 different times to "come home and relax with my best friend". I just needed a temporary escape because...[insert excuse here]. Every time I came back from a relapse the pile of problems I already had were still there, and I brought a whole new pile of problems with me to stack on top of the old problems.

I finally figured it out that I had to find a recovery plan that helps me stay sober no matter what life threw at me. Until you do that there will always be something that happens in life that will be a good enough excuse to drink, because life is going to have its ups and downs whether you are an alcoholic or not.

It sounds like this ain't your first rodeo 2much so you probably know what needs to be done here. Bottom line is that you have to want to stay sober more than you want to drink. That is an absolute must to have any chance at long-term sobriety. Anytime you want to talk seriously about finding a solution to your alcohol problem you are welcome to PM me. I don't do b!tch and moan sessions (that is not aimed at you just a clarifier) but I would be more than willing to discuss helping you put a plan together to achieve lasting sobriety.
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Old 05-10-2014, 03:13 PM
  # 68 (permalink)  
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This has to be the busiest thread I've seen in a long time. And I must thank everyone for their responses. 2much - hope you are taking this to heart and reading what everyone here is trying to say.

I've bookmarked this thread as if I ever dare consider a drink, I will be coming back to this thread to read all the comments made as they are responses filled with concern, care, honesty, and even at times hard love. To me hard love is something you have to develop a sense of acceptance. I used to be offended by people being straightforward, but now I know that the person on the other end just wants to see me succeed - the last thing they want to do is assist in a fall.

What more can a person ask for in "friends"?
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Old 05-10-2014, 04:36 PM
  # 69 (permalink)  
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Wish I would have read all of 2muchpain's previous posts before I posted earlier...(I will start doing that now, good lesson...) he has already heard all of this before..and again, and again.... clearly he is just not ready to stop drinking, nothing anyone is going to "say" can change that at this point, maybe in future. It takes what it it is a deadly condition however, I hope the future will be there for this person.
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Old 05-10-2014, 04:56 PM
  # 70 (permalink)  
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I was feeling like that myself tonight, I really was. I so badly wanted to visit my old friend again and was looking for any excuse to get reacquainted. But as wonderful as it would have been to spend an evening together I had to keep in mind that friend tried to kill me and destroy everything around me. I even went to shop earlier today and looked upon my friend with a hope that this time it would be a brief but fun get together. But in the end I knew I was lying to myself and with difficulty walked away. I'll probably do this many times I think in the days, months to come. But as long as I keep walking away that's fine.
That's just the way I was feeling tho' and I hope everything goes well for you 2mutch. Take care and all the very best.
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Old 05-10-2014, 05:15 PM
  # 71 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by 2muchpain View Post
It would be nice to be able to have sober friends to drop by to hang around, but that's not possible in my world, and AA doesn't provide this.
That has mot been my experience with AA. I found lots of sober people there that wanted to be around me when I would let them.
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Old 05-10-2014, 05:44 PM
  # 72 (permalink)  
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Hello everybody. Maybe my tread was a mistake. I am not looking for people to support my drinking, but I never thought I would get such negaitive responses. I am a drunk, and everything that goes with it. I am not looking for a pat on the back. I don't need that to stay sober. It's up to me whether I drink or not, but your comments mean a lot to me but being honest on this forum is risky.
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Old 05-10-2014, 05:48 PM
  # 73 (permalink)  
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It's not risky at all - you've gotten some really caring genuine advice here.

Tell us - what do you mean by support 2much?
what do you expect of this community?

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Old 05-10-2014, 05:58 PM
  # 74 (permalink)  
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I know that you have tried AA
the book talks about a psychic change
so as to stay sober
wonder what your thoughts are on that

maybe this change does not happen
until we put the plug in the jug

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Old 05-10-2014, 05:58 PM
  # 75 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by dSober View Post
That has mot been my experience with AA. I found lots of sober people there that wanted to be around me when I would let them.
I really was that way were I live, If it was, I'd jump on the chance to meet people. I have shared this before in meetings, but have few responses. People have conserns about new people and I undertand that, but my being to the same meeting for over a year does not make sensel
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Old 05-10-2014, 06:07 PM
  # 76 (permalink)  
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since this is already at the top again I will chime in... I didn't earlier because I didn't want to keep it on the forefront...

being honest is risky? do you not think anyone answered you honestly? honesty, giving and receiving criticism works both ways. you posted quite a "provocative" thread. just from reading it, one cannot determine if it was put out there for the shock factor, to snub your nose at sobriety or if you were actually screaming for help. people replied how they saw fit - how they were affected by it. if you were taken aback by some of the response or otherwise didn't want any responses, then you should not have posted it.

how it took on a life of its own is another matter.
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Old 05-10-2014, 06:10 PM
  # 77 (permalink)  
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If you are attending meetings and drinking I understand that people won't befriend you outside of the rooms.Sober people don't want to socialise with drunks,if newly sober it can trigger them to drink.I have seen that happen.Sober people keep sober company.

People will be more than willing to befriend you,but you need to put the drink down,accept you are an Alcoholic and stay away from the first drink.

How sad it makes me ,to think of the pain you are going to put yourself through again.

What a truly awful thing Alcoholism is.
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Old 05-10-2014, 06:30 PM
  # 78 (permalink)  
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This is sad, I have literally not read one NEGATIVE comment on the whole thread...shows what active drinking or how even a dry drunk messes with the mind and we can become SO sensitive....All this is such a good reminder of what it's like out there...
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Old 05-10-2014, 06:47 PM
  # 79 (permalink)  
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This post really made me want to drink. It brought it all back in black and white. The replies saved me. Thanks guys. I'm 23 days sober and it's not worth it. I played the tape. I treasure my 23 days.
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Old 05-10-2014, 11:10 PM
  # 80 (permalink)  
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Your name is right on not2late. It's never too late 'til you're on the slab. It's just a matter of just how close one wants/needs to get.
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