Class of February 2013 part 2
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Vancouver BC
Posts: 9
Hi Goose1,
Thanks for you response. It really helps to know there are others going through the same thing. I feel like I'm sick and tired enough, but I've felt that before, and I really don't trust myself. It seems like just when I get my head above water long enough to take a breath I get another reality check as to how much damage I've really done. Yesterday I find out my disability is being reduced, and today my aftercare program calls and says they can't take me back.
This is all due to my relapse, and I have no one to blame but myself. I have used up all my chances and burned all my bridges. The house of cards is collapsing and I am totally overwhelmed. It's all I can do today to not pick up. I know that will only make it worse. All I can do right now is to hang on and have faith that things will get better.
Thanks for you response. It really helps to know there are others going through the same thing. I feel like I'm sick and tired enough, but I've felt that before, and I really don't trust myself. It seems like just when I get my head above water long enough to take a breath I get another reality check as to how much damage I've really done. Yesterday I find out my disability is being reduced, and today my aftercare program calls and says they can't take me back.
This is all due to my relapse, and I have no one to blame but myself. I have used up all my chances and burned all my bridges. The house of cards is collapsing and I am totally overwhelmed. It's all I can do today to not pick up. I know that will only make it worse. All I can do right now is to hang on and have faith that things will get better.
Reach Out and Touch Faith
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: On a Sailboat
Posts: 3,871
Another thing in sobriety is I've learned I have more control over my outlook. For example, now when I wake up on the wrong side of the bed I find music that brings my mood around, instead of other substances.
Welcome to all the new faces.
Welcome to all the new faces.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 494
Came home today and SR actually "triggered" me today. So I had to go to the shop and buy lots of food. Mmm cookies. Anything not to drink. Mostly though so far when an idea pops into my head to drink, I've responded with a sarcastic "yeah, right!" It's quite satisfying. Hoping to add to my arsenal of coping strategies. Interested in meditation. It's been a good day.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 539
24 DAYS!!!!???
What? How did that happen? I cant believe it. Thats almost a month. And to think nearing the end of January I thought I couldnt make it 3 days!!
I got through a family trip out of town to a nice hotel. Wouldve been the perfect time to drink beer. We were even planning on bringing Granpa so he could watch the kids when we went out. But that was then.
And it was sooooooo nice to wake up refreshed in the morning.
And we could bring the kids swimming in the chloriney pool withOUT headaches. YAY!!
What? How did that happen? I cant believe it. Thats almost a month. And to think nearing the end of January I thought I couldnt make it 3 days!!
I got through a family trip out of town to a nice hotel. Wouldve been the perfect time to drink beer. We were even planning on bringing Granpa so he could watch the kids when we went out. But that was then.
And it was sooooooo nice to wake up refreshed in the morning.
And we could bring the kids swimming in the chloriney pool withOUT headaches. YAY!!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,533
Originally Posted by TigerLili 
Day 10. I'm so unwell with a heavy cold that I can barely get out bed the last four days so that's probably a contributing factor.
Love Venus xx
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,533
Originally Posted by RocketQueen
31 days done and dusted. Went to the doc this morning to get some test results back - bad news. Off to the hospital shortly for some intense antibiotics. Wish me luck!
Hope all is OK...here for you whatever you need....love and hugs
Venus xx
Dancediva
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: NE
Posts: 67
Originally Posted by 1stepup
Hi everyone, day three here for me. Got through the worst of the come down. Feel weak still though and sleeping still a problem.
Went to see kids last night and it was great seeing them, my eldest needed medicine for temperature and it felt good to be there for her.
Put them to bed, and then watched tv waiting for ex-girlfriend to come home from day out with her mum- unfortunately i was right with my previous message. Her mum came home first blind drunk 2 hours later than arranged, verbally abusive, (she has had a drink problem all her life but doesnt admit to it). Luckily the kids were fast asleep and i didnt retaliate so it was just her slurring away, she was followed by ex who was also blind drunk and abusive. I told them both calmly that i am trying to get sober and basically dont want to get into an argument.
It was a horrible thing to endure and a bit of a reminder in a way that i was not the only side to blame for the break-up. Even if her drinking was mainly once a week, i cant ever remember her coming home not blind drunk. Can gain strength from that.
After the mother left, i realised that it wasnt wise to leave ex drunk with kids, so slept the night there freezing on the sofa. She was fine in the morning and i dont think she remembers the abuse, i didnt mention it, kissed the kids goodbye and have now come home still sober. Glad i can message here and get it out rather than get angry and drink.
Good luck and best wishes everyone.
Went to see kids last night and it was great seeing them, my eldest needed medicine for temperature and it felt good to be there for her.
Put them to bed, and then watched tv waiting for ex-girlfriend to come home from day out with her mum- unfortunately i was right with my previous message. Her mum came home first blind drunk 2 hours later than arranged, verbally abusive, (she has had a drink problem all her life but doesnt admit to it). Luckily the kids were fast asleep and i didnt retaliate so it was just her slurring away, she was followed by ex who was also blind drunk and abusive. I told them both calmly that i am trying to get sober and basically dont want to get into an argument.
It was a horrible thing to endure and a bit of a reminder in a way that i was not the only side to blame for the break-up. Even if her drinking was mainly once a week, i cant ever remember her coming home not blind drunk. Can gain strength from that.
After the mother left, i realised that it wasnt wise to leave ex drunk with kids, so slept the night there freezing on the sofa. She was fine in the morning and i dont think she remembers the abuse, i didnt mention it, kissed the kids goodbye and have now come home still sober. Glad i can message here and get it out rather than get angry and drink.
Good luck and best wishes everyone.
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