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Finally Ready

Old 12-23-2009, 12:22 PM
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Finally Ready

Greetings to Everyone and Happy Holidays!

I just found this site today and have been reading it all morning. Funny that I never found it before. I guess the Universe thought today was the day.

I have been drinking for a long time, but the last year really got bad. I work from home and opening up a bottle of wine in the morning suddenly became the norm. The guilt that followed at the end of the day with nothing done also became the norm. I have stopped and started so many times, but never made it past two weeks. Those were two great weeks, though!

I have been going to therapy, AA meetings and have an amazing doctor. I also found I have a surprisingly supportive family. I finally admitted to all of them that I was an alcoholic and needed help. That was a big step for me.

Today I took Antabuse for the first time. I have had it sitting on my desk for almost a week, but took it right when I got up today. Panic quickly set in. What was I going to do without a drink?!!! Well, it's already been six hours and I am still here and while it's hard, I know what will happen so I am keeping busy. I needed this step to get me going. I also think I will need this board as part of my overall plan.

Thanks for reading this! I look forward to reading all your stories and advice.
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Old 12-23-2009, 12:30 PM
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MaxRay,

Welcome to SR! I'm glad you found us! Lots of good information and support here. And really great people!

Love,

Lenina
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Old 12-23-2009, 12:37 PM
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Welcome to SR, MaxRay!

Yes, it's amazing how the disease creeps up on a person.

You are doing lots of good steps.

Kelly
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Old 12-23-2009, 12:48 PM
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Welcome to a great recovery site! Best one on the net!

I too used to drink wine in the morning. I drank it to stop the shakes. I knew I was in a bad way but it took me a while to admit it and took longer to stop drinking. Two years later and I'm starting again. I was doing so well and then gave in to my feelings and drank. Got back on the wagon and stayed for a while, then slipped again. I'm more determined than ever to make it this time cause I'm afraid of what will happen if I drink again.

You can quit drinking for good. It's not easy but it's simple: just for today, don't drink. I'm glad you found us and joined the family!
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Old 12-23-2009, 12:51 PM
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Welcome to SR Max Ray

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Old 12-23-2009, 01:11 PM
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Thanks for the greetings!

Least, I read your post and felt like I could have written. So glad I am not the only one. I have been trying for about two years as well. This time I will make it!

Thanks again everyone!
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Old 12-23-2009, 01:29 PM
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Old 12-23-2009, 01:57 PM
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The guilt that followed at the end of the day with nothing done also became the norm.
While alcohol isn't my problem, pain pills are, I can relate to this. I was taking them to get through the day but then that turned into taking them so I would feel okay about getting nothing accomplished. You sound like you are on your way to an improved you. I hope the Antabuse works well for you. Im not too familiar with it, but Im sure others may be.
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Old 12-23-2009, 02:01 PM
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Welcome to SR. Keep reading and posting....this place is an awesome adventure!
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