raemi13

Hey everyone,

I'm new here, and I may need some help.

With Christmas this week and New Year's next week, I'm kind of freaking out on how to handle the whole thing without drinking.

I have been sober since November 28, 2009 - which is when I feel I truly hit rock bottom (another story for another day, I'm sure!).

I never was an "every-day drinker" but more like every weekend, football game and holiday, and any other occasion that seemed to warrant it.

My problem has been that I just don't stop when I start. And within the past year have really forgotten what I've done when I've been drinking (I guess this would be blackouts) and have done some pretty stupid things.

I don't want to be that person anymore.

I have managed to get through a few Friday night bowling nights without drinking, and even managed tailgating this past Sunday and attending an NFL game without the beer...which I can tell you was really rough, but once everyone around me was drunk, I wanted no part of it and they were just all stupid and I wanted to go home.

How do I handle being around all the drinking people?

Is drinking non-alcoholic wine and beer o.k.???

My husband says he's supporting me, but he makes this all about him in that he is afraid that once I'm sober long enough he thinks I won't want to be around him anymore. WTF??? Why is this about HIM????

As you can see, I have quite a few questions.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks!

Lenina

raemi,

Congrats on your sober time! And welcome to SR! Have you read the stickies posted above the forums? Lots of good information there!

Sometime our significant others have worries when we decide to be sober. It's a change for them too. Is he a big drinker?

Do you have a plan for recovery?

I'm glad you've joined us!

Love,

Lenina

lagirl310

Hi Lenina!

I'm new here as well. Today is day 3 for me. Hopefully since you haven't been drinking huge amounts every day, you won't go through any of the horrible withdrawal symptoms I've read about other going through.

I've quit twice before for 3 weeks at a time and never had any withdrawal symptoms, so I guess, and I hope that even though I was drinking every day for years, that I'm not physically addicted.

But like you, I am emotionally and psychologically dependent and that's what's going to get hard for me. When I do all the things I used to do that were associated with drinking. I feel strong now, but in the past I've felt strong and then one day seem to fizzle out and care anymore. That's what I'm most worried about: how do I handle it when the day comes that I wake up and say is all this really worth it. I don't give a crap anymore. That's my biggest fear? Do you relate to that?

Dee74

hi raemi

welcome to SR - you've done well to get here - this is a great place for support.

Sometimes we need that support especially if our partners are not as supportive as we'd like. We're 'open' 24/7

I found just not drinking wasn't enough - I needed to really do things differently in my life. I really worked on that 'hole' inside me that I tried to fill with booze.

It's not easy to do that, thats why some here find face to face support is crucial too. You'll find a lot of people here in AA, some in counselling, some in other recovery programmes.

Read around, post as much as like. You're not alone
D

lagirl310

Okay, I just noticed a bunch of typos in my last response and I promise I haven't touched a drop! LOL But for season the system won't allow edits after 15 mins. I guess I need to do a better job of proofreading. LOL

raemi13

Thanks for all the quick replies! Great support here, I can tell already!

No - I don't have a plan for recovery, I guess this is my first shot at trying to make that happen.
I do want to start attending AA meetings and have checked out locations and times.
I also think some individual therapy would be good for me...so I'm checking into that as well.

Lenina - Yes, my husband drinks...along the same pattern as I did. Too much at once, but not every day. He should not drink, but I would never ask him to quit - that is up to him.

D - I know what you mean about working on that "hole"...it will take work, and I know that.

Lagirl - I didn't even notice the typos...funny. And yes, about your first post - I think that I can relate.

Thanks again...I will be reading the stickies and other posts to get more and more information...and if I stay true to form, I'll be on information overload very soon!