Berony

Good morning all,

Just checking in at the start of day 10 for me.

Well done everyone racking up all these sober days.
I had a tough time on bank holiday Monday but managed to resist, I think the combination of bank holiday and sun really made me want a drink, disaster avoided thankfully.

Dee I’ve seen PAWS mentioned, what is this please?

Have a wonderful day all 😁

venuscat

PAWS stands for Post Acute Withdrawal Syndrome. s

I am thinking Dee will have a good link so you can read up on it a bit. xxxx
And congrats on Day 10 dear Berony! s ❤️

venuscat

Wishing you a good day dear WL. s

For me, some of the motivation comes after I start....getting that first load of laundry done gives me a feeling of satisfaction and then I want to keep going. Let's do this together today.....I have lots of housework. s ❤️

Berony

Thanks Venus 😊

venuscat

My bad dreams tend to reflect my fears and/or things that have stressed me out.....I imagine hand santiser would show up in a nightmare for me too if I had drunk some of it.

Hope today is a really good day for you dear FF. ❤️

listae

WL: have a great Day 3! I'm right behind you at Day 2!

I'm hopeful for a better day today than yesterday: I don't know what it is about Day 1 but, man, it's literally like battling with a ferocious grizzly bear that just wants to knock you out! Today, well I'm beginning by reading some sobriety literature, posting, and writing in my journal. I'm going to go for a power walk (1-2) miles.

I really want to approach sobriety differently this time around: I've been a "revolving door" now for twenty years and I've had major consequences but still let the grizzly bear knock me out.

So, I apologize if I post too much. I'm gotta get through Day 2. Otherwise, I'll be at Day 1 getting knocked down by the Grizzly Bear AGAIN. It is an awful feeling being perpetually at Day 1. You feel that you can't accomplish the simplest thing: laundry, hygiene, changing your clothes, cleaning, reading! Succumbing to that drink to numb out my loneliness and isolation (not to mention the unpleasant memories that I carry with me) takes away every shred of your confidence.

Drinking is hopelessness incarnate; sobriety is hope. So, I'm hopeful today for ALL OF US!

Sober369

Congrats to all on your milestones! I hope today is an easy day for everyone. Let's stay close and stay sober!

Wastinglife

I hear you Listae. I have been staring at the mess I am surrounded by and know I will let it sit. I haven't slept since Sunday. The first week is hell. My record of zero sleep is 6 days straight and not a wink.

I did, however, figure out a part of a puzzle that has been haunting me for a while.

venuscat

Post away dearest listae.....we don't want the grizzly bear to get you. s

Good morning dear Karen. s

And yes dear WL, rest.....it's so so hard not sleeping. Sending love and really glad you figured out a piece of the puzzle. s

Sober369

Good morning Venus! I hope you're having a great day.
WL, that does sound tough! I hope you can at least take a nap.
Listae, I love that you are posting so much. We can help you through!
Hope, I hope your house problem is not too serious. Stress is one of the worst things for me at least.
Hugs to all.

freedomfries

AV won't let up. I'm just playing the tape forward. Even if the Antabuse does work, "one or two" will turn into a life ruining bender. A bender at this point would ruin my life - it would mean not finishing college. It could possibly mean another arrest maybe a day in court. It could mean a conviction.

And what if I didn't go on a bender? What if I had one or two. I might feel warm and fuzzy for ten minutes. Then I'd have to start over on day 0. Hardly worth throwing away six days for ten minutes minimal pleasure. And I might not even get that pleasure because of the Antabuse. I could get very sick

So I won't drink.​​
​​​​​​

Jewel72

Well, after I finally made it back to day one on Sunday, I decided to drink on Memorial Day. Not sure why but that lead me to drink yesterday, and on and on this will go if I don’t quit, for good, today. Hating myself. I am in a women’s group, so I feel like I have support IRL, but the fact that we can’t meet in person makes me feel quite alone in this. My husband doesn’t get. I am so tired. But going to try for day 1 again today.

freedomfries

Welcome back Jewel. Make this your last day 1

venuscat

You wouldn't feel warm and fuzzy at all. Most likely you would be very sick, as you said.
Let it go FF.....as a friend here always used to say....take alcohol off the table. s

Do you have a treadmill at home?
I know you live near the canal and there are lovely walks to go on.....get a natural high from exercise and fresh air.
It really helped me every time my AV went off.

venuscat

With you every step honey.

Drinking for one day is kind of impossible for all of us I think....alcohol is not our friend, as listae said a couple of days ago. s ❤️

Wastinglife

Still have not slept since Sunday. Insomnia is always my most feared withdrawal symptom. It's just too much time. Too many hours to fill. I am still wide awake at about 60 hours without sleep. Even when I was doing drugs, I wouldn't stay up so long....

venuscat

Maybe you could call a doctor dear WL....do a tele appt, get some professional advice? s

My suggestion is to have a warm shower and lie down with your eyes closed....I believe that even resting is helpful.
I am really sorry you are going through this. ❤️

Sober369

This is my third try to post! Orin, that's my grandson, is feeling lonesome today and needed me to play. He has a game called "sneak and peek". I have to be the lookout, and he tries to peek at people without them seeing him.
Freedom, you made a great choice. I'm so happy for you!
WL, I'm so sorry you aren't sleeping! How long does that usually last? Are you worried about the apartment? I know you need to get it cleaned up to feel better, but if letting it go for now will help you sleep, then go for it. You can do it a few trash bags at a time, you don't have to do it all at once. Are you having a hard time throwing it away? I know that can be a problem for some people. They just feel bad throwing it away.
Jewel, how is it going? Day ones are so hard. I remember how much you loved being sober, and you were so good at it, too. I hope so much you make it through today without a drink.
Happy day 2 Listae! Fantastic!
And congrats to everyone on their milestones!

Coz

Hi everyone

Congrats to all that made another day or sobriety and to those who have chosen to make today their last day 1 today. This is a pretty tough journey - sort of like starting a long walk with the steepest uphill climb at the start.

WL - hope you managed to get some sleep. Today is hopefully a better day for you and you can take some steps to relax, rest and sleep.

Jewel - great to see your post. Please remember that there is always someone around on SR and you will find support 24/7. Really hope that this is your last day 1. Have you changed your plan a bit to address why you decided to drink?

Listae - I am going to learn how to upload photos today, so here is my first attempt - it's for you as a reminder of day 1's.....

.

Have a great day/night everyone! Stay sober and post often - this is the most amazing class of communicators!

listae

Well it’s 5 P.M. and the Grizzly wants me to have a glass of wine. It’s a tough time: my mood completely changes by this time. I’m in tears and in bed. But I’m trying to do everything possible not to drink. It’s not going to help.