Class of December 2014 Part 6
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Georgia
Posts: 242
Hey family! Mld, I'm so sorry for the loss of your friend.
B, I'm glad you're resting and super glad you have your husband to take care of you.
Ok, so about this exact same time last year I was working in a job I loved, but had a micromanaging, bully boss. It was this same time that I found out my dad was terminally ill. The stress from the job, plus the stress from my personal life was more than I could take. So I quit the job.
Fast forward to last week. A former coworker at this job let me know that it was available again and micromanaging, bully boss has retired. So on a whim, I applied for the job. I got called for an interview and it was today. I won't know anything until next week but I think it went really well. I knew all three people on the interview panel. They all know exactly why I quit last year. Everyone in the division breathed a sigh of relief when my old boss retired. I pray I can get that job back! I would definitely quit the weekend job that I can't seem to learn. Anyway, this story might be hard to follow, but thanks for reading. Just keep your fingers crossed that I can get my old job back.
I'm headed to bed. It's been a long and stressful day. Plus, I've been unable to sleep for the past two nights, worrying about this interview. I'm tired!
Hugs to all!
B, I'm glad you're resting and super glad you have your husband to take care of you.
Ok, so about this exact same time last year I was working in a job I loved, but had a micromanaging, bully boss. It was this same time that I found out my dad was terminally ill. The stress from the job, plus the stress from my personal life was more than I could take. So I quit the job.
Fast forward to last week. A former coworker at this job let me know that it was available again and micromanaging, bully boss has retired. So on a whim, I applied for the job. I got called for an interview and it was today. I won't know anything until next week but I think it went really well. I knew all three people on the interview panel. They all know exactly why I quit last year. Everyone in the division breathed a sigh of relief when my old boss retired. I pray I can get that job back! I would definitely quit the weekend job that I can't seem to learn. Anyway, this story might be hard to follow, but thanks for reading. Just keep your fingers crossed that I can get my old job back.
I'm headed to bed. It's been a long and stressful day. Plus, I've been unable to sleep for the past two nights, worrying about this interview. I'm tired!
Hugs to all!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Northern Illinos
Posts: 1,757
Shannon I am so excited for you. Getting that job back would be great. Fingers crossed.
Copper, so sorry that your mother treats you that way. Even though you are doing everything right she sure know how to push your buttons and make you feel like crap. Hang in there. Time will come when you will have your own space. (((Copper)))
Copper, so sorry that your mother treats you that way. Even though you are doing everything right she sure know how to push your buttons and make you feel like crap. Hang in there. Time will come when you will have your own space. (((Copper)))
...holds the key
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 7,065
Copper...I'm not exactly sure what you're planning on doing with that $50 but that screw it all has me a bit worried. Please don't drink. Please don't go to a bar. Don't let you're moms moods/illness dictate your sobriety, ok? Because YOU are the one that has to wake up with yourself in the morning, and you don't want to wake up with regrets, right?
I know all about wacky moms, ok? I know the hurt and damage they can cause, and I am so very sorry you're going through this. I'm sending lots of hugs your way and a shoulder to lean on/cry on...whatever you need, alright? Please be good to yourself tonight, copper. ❤️
I know all about wacky moms, ok? I know the hurt and damage they can cause, and I am so very sorry you're going through this. I'm sending lots of hugs your way and a shoulder to lean on/cry on...whatever you need, alright? Please be good to yourself tonight, copper. ❤️
Hillbilly Girl
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: In my Garden
Posts: 3,953
Really glad that the procedure went well BBQ & you are resting & in good hands
Copper - I'm sorry about the situation with your Mom. I know there are no easy answers, and don't know what your options are for changing the living arrangements, but hope that you are taking care of yourself. Thinking of you.
Mld.....So sorry for the loss of your friend.
So the DUI situation was talked about here yesterday, so I thought I would share my experience with those. I am 51 years old, had my first DUI in my early 20's, my second at age 35 & my 3rd, 2 years ago next month. The 1st one doesn't seem to exist in any records, but as my DUI 2 years ago fell within 15 years (14 year apart), I was not eligible for a diversion program....lost my license for a year & have been required to have an emission device in my care for 2 years....my 2 years will be up on April 1st. After my arrest for this last DUI, I literally wanted to throw some clothes in a backpack, walk to the interstate & disappear. The shame of it was devastating...the embarrassment to my Sons' & my family, I lost a job that required me to drive, the financial business was in all over $7000 dollars. I did stick around to face the music, knowing that if I disappeared, it would hurt my Sons even more than the other & they have been my biggest supporters. At my first court appearance, there was 2 other people being arraigned on manslaughter charges, having killed someone while drinking & driving. The whole thing has been "tough" but I am just so very thankful, I didn't hurt anyone.....it really is a blessing that I didn't.
Love & Hugs to you all
Copper - I'm sorry about the situation with your Mom. I know there are no easy answers, and don't know what your options are for changing the living arrangements, but hope that you are taking care of yourself. Thinking of you.
Mld.....So sorry for the loss of your friend.
So the DUI situation was talked about here yesterday, so I thought I would share my experience with those. I am 51 years old, had my first DUI in my early 20's, my second at age 35 & my 3rd, 2 years ago next month. The 1st one doesn't seem to exist in any records, but as my DUI 2 years ago fell within 15 years (14 year apart), I was not eligible for a diversion program....lost my license for a year & have been required to have an emission device in my care for 2 years....my 2 years will be up on April 1st. After my arrest for this last DUI, I literally wanted to throw some clothes in a backpack, walk to the interstate & disappear. The shame of it was devastating...the embarrassment to my Sons' & my family, I lost a job that required me to drive, the financial business was in all over $7000 dollars. I did stick around to face the music, knowing that if I disappeared, it would hurt my Sons even more than the other & they have been my biggest supporters. At my first court appearance, there was 2 other people being arraigned on manslaughter charges, having killed someone while drinking & driving. The whole thing has been "tough" but I am just so very thankful, I didn't hurt anyone.....it really is a blessing that I didn't.
Love & Hugs to you all
...holds the key
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 7,065
Thanks for sharing that Mariah.
I'm with you...I thank god every day I didn't kill someone in my stupidity! We could be sitting in prison right now with an innocent persons blood on our hands. That's something we would NEVER get over.
I am eternally grateful to have this second chance at life.
Love and hugs to you too, Mariah.
I'm with you...I thank god every day I didn't kill someone in my stupidity! We could be sitting in prison right now with an innocent persons blood on our hands. That's something we would NEVER get over.
I am eternally grateful to have this second chance at life.
Love and hugs to you too, Mariah.
Ya**!
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Canada! wtf eh?
Posts: 1,123
Yes, thank you Mariah. While I don't have any dueces on my record, I've driven often when I had no business behind the wheel and remember an instance where I was passing out and nearly hit an oncoming car head-on. You'd think that would've been my last time driving like that but it wasnt.
I'm so grateful those days are no more.
I'm so grateful those days are no more.
Hillbilly Girl
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: In my Garden
Posts: 3,953
The night I got my last DUI, 2 years ago, was on a Friday night....I think I had several weeks of sobriety at the time (I had started an outpatient treatment program on my own), I was exhausted, as I had been working a lot. I decided that I would be fine to just drink a few at home.....had no intention of going anywhere. So I drank my "few" 40 ounces, in my usual manner, which is to guzzle them in no time flat. I then had a call from a friend to come see him & in my alcoholic frame of mind, decided I was fine to do that. Ended up with my car in a ditch on a rural road, and someone called the police. I was twice the legal limit.
I'm really, really looking forward to getting that device out of my car the first of April after two years of blowing into it every time I start my car, but I also know that while in my "right" mind I understand the consequences of every drinking and driving again would be "significant", I also know that when I drink, I'm not the one that does the thinking, the alcohol "runs the show" for me. Thankfully, there's a solution to that problem.
Goodnight & have a great Friday All!
I'm really, really looking forward to getting that device out of my car the first of April after two years of blowing into it every time I start my car, but I also know that while in my "right" mind I understand the consequences of every drinking and driving again would be "significant", I also know that when I drink, I'm not the one that does the thinking, the alcohol "runs the show" for me. Thankfully, there's a solution to that problem.
Goodnight & have a great Friday All!
Live easy but think first
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Sonoran Desert
Posts: 480
Hello my family... Been a bit MIA from SR.
It has been a rough gig of a week, but am getting on the other side of it. Just spun out a bit with life on life's terms. Much of my using and drinking was to keep a distance between my emotions and the world. Without the alcohol, I feel a bit exposed, a raw nerve quality. I also have a VERY short memory and frame of reference right now so whatever emotive state I am in, it feels as though I have been there forever and will remain there forever, which is not the case ever ever.
Thank you for the gems of wisdom today. It helped a lot. I get triggered a lot by people. Oh and by places. Oh, and by things. Did I mention I am a bit of a raw nerve? This too shall pass...
Copper - I was very glad to see your posts. I can relate to much of what you shared, and the sharing by others that followed. I am glad that you spoke up instead of drinking. It's these moments that we choose a different action that change everything. I've been thinking about it from the standpoint of changing a course of a ship just 1 degree. That 1 degree change will not have too great an impact at first, but imagine the different place it would be in after a week, two weeks, month at sea... We are doing a whole lotta course correcting, more than a single degree. But somedays it is just the tiniest move away from alcohol that will steer us to a lifetime of sobriety. If we go to bed sober tonight we have a chance. I see tonight has been a hard one for you. I have drank and used in the past over resentment and anger. My sponsor has told me that is like drinking poison and waiting for the person we are mad at to die. Rings true for me.
Erin - I thought it was incredibly powerful to see you giving back to Copper in the way others were able to support you. You were right there, fresh with wisdom from having gotten through your own rough patch. Beautiful.
Jsbodhi - having a weekend in front of you in which you are going to feel pressure to be charming and delightful is rough, especially without the familiar social lubricant. I appreciate your thoughts on this and how you are approaching it. The thought occurs to me to give yourself space in each day to do whatever you want/need to do to rest from that pressure. Our brains are still healing from our years of drinking, synapses still forming, good feeling GABA still reproducing. A break will be a very good thing! Ha ha! Just got to your post about having the place to yourself for the whole day! Woot! Yes!!!
Tonks - your post about asking for help and finding that hard as the helper hit home for me. My vocation and trade is social work. I ran drug and alcohol treatment centers for the love of all things sacred. I get in the way of myself constantly. You showed me how to ask for help. Because you asked for help, I felt more comfortable asking for help. I continue to learn from you. And I am right there with the toxic padre piece. Rough stuff.
Della- thinking of you as the court date is pending. Please keep talking as you need to. I believe in you!
Princess Shannon - Fan-frickin-tastic! Here is my claim to fame in ancestry - Andy Griffith is my fifth cousin on my dad's side and we are related to Lizzie Borden on my mom's side. Wholesome and patricide in my gene pool. I guess I have choices. Awesome energy for you for that job! So happy to hear it went well. And boo to bullying people in power.
Brynn - Thanks! For sharing on your DWI's and I am glad you are safe and they are safe and we are no longer drinking. This made me think... The thing about this disease is it makes us completely unthinking and shells of who we actually are. Aware, kind, loving people drive drunk. We did. It was part of it. So, four years ago I am at an AA mtg and I am trying to decide if I am an alcoholic. There was a 26 year old woman there who shared her experience. She drank like I drank, binge on weekends and mid week, often black out. No consequences though. No legal stuff, no loss of job, no loss of family, etc. I talked with her after the mtg and we kept in touch for about six months. She went back out, then I ended up going back out about a year later. Never talked to her again. December 27 She drives drunk and kills someone. 30 years old now. She lost her job, she lost her freedom, she lost everything, and she now is living with having killed someone. The point is this: I drank and drove. A lot. It was part of my insanity. This story, any story, could be my story. If I ever use or drink again, it is a risk I am taking. Thankful to be home in bed and sober. Some poor soul is sitting in handcuffs right now. That never has to be us again. Ever. Thanks for that reminder! I am so happy to hear about the healing happening for you!
Mld51 - so glad to hear that the assessment was a positive experience and he could see your sincerity. I am so sorry to hear about your friend passing. My heart is with you. Would love to hear more about your friend if you care to share. Stay close.
Maximus - I so appreciate you jumping in with both feet. Fantastic! I struggle connecting with others as well. I have started challenging myself to introduce myself to one person per meeting. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. It's always awkward, but I generally feel better in my chair after having done that. For what it's worth.
Big shoe - your words were spot on re: DUI. We all have choice now and thankfully we are safe. Sorry to hear about your wife's fall. Doesn't sound fun. Love. How active you are.
Cast down - great resolve. Good to hear from you!
Mariah - drinking is just not an option. Words to live by. I have been repeating that to myself as well as "I don't drink or use, no matter what!" That piece is important to me. I have always kept, in the back of my mind, reasons that would be ok to relapse. No matter what. Period. No exceptions. New for me. I appreciated your candor as well regarding DUIs. It is a blessing to be where we are right now.
BBQ - I set my clock to do a meditation your direction three times today. Love!!!!! And I'm glad Mr. BBQis a good one!!! You deserve lots of love.
Dee - thanks for that resource. I used it today and it was very helpful.
Starsnskies - congrats on day 40!!!!
Going to bed sober. That's a day well lived. The rest is just icing.
Love!!!
Dax
It has been a rough gig of a week, but am getting on the other side of it. Just spun out a bit with life on life's terms. Much of my using and drinking was to keep a distance between my emotions and the world. Without the alcohol, I feel a bit exposed, a raw nerve quality. I also have a VERY short memory and frame of reference right now so whatever emotive state I am in, it feels as though I have been there forever and will remain there forever, which is not the case ever ever.
Thank you for the gems of wisdom today. It helped a lot. I get triggered a lot by people. Oh and by places. Oh, and by things. Did I mention I am a bit of a raw nerve? This too shall pass...
Copper - I was very glad to see your posts. I can relate to much of what you shared, and the sharing by others that followed. I am glad that you spoke up instead of drinking. It's these moments that we choose a different action that change everything. I've been thinking about it from the standpoint of changing a course of a ship just 1 degree. That 1 degree change will not have too great an impact at first, but imagine the different place it would be in after a week, two weeks, month at sea... We are doing a whole lotta course correcting, more than a single degree. But somedays it is just the tiniest move away from alcohol that will steer us to a lifetime of sobriety. If we go to bed sober tonight we have a chance. I see tonight has been a hard one for you. I have drank and used in the past over resentment and anger. My sponsor has told me that is like drinking poison and waiting for the person we are mad at to die. Rings true for me.
Erin - I thought it was incredibly powerful to see you giving back to Copper in the way others were able to support you. You were right there, fresh with wisdom from having gotten through your own rough patch. Beautiful.
Jsbodhi - having a weekend in front of you in which you are going to feel pressure to be charming and delightful is rough, especially without the familiar social lubricant. I appreciate your thoughts on this and how you are approaching it. The thought occurs to me to give yourself space in each day to do whatever you want/need to do to rest from that pressure. Our brains are still healing from our years of drinking, synapses still forming, good feeling GABA still reproducing. A break will be a very good thing! Ha ha! Just got to your post about having the place to yourself for the whole day! Woot! Yes!!!
Tonks - your post about asking for help and finding that hard as the helper hit home for me. My vocation and trade is social work. I ran drug and alcohol treatment centers for the love of all things sacred. I get in the way of myself constantly. You showed me how to ask for help. Because you asked for help, I felt more comfortable asking for help. I continue to learn from you. And I am right there with the toxic padre piece. Rough stuff.
Della- thinking of you as the court date is pending. Please keep talking as you need to. I believe in you!
Princess Shannon - Fan-frickin-tastic! Here is my claim to fame in ancestry - Andy Griffith is my fifth cousin on my dad's side and we are related to Lizzie Borden on my mom's side. Wholesome and patricide in my gene pool. I guess I have choices. Awesome energy for you for that job! So happy to hear it went well. And boo to bullying people in power.
Brynn - Thanks! For sharing on your DWI's and I am glad you are safe and they are safe and we are no longer drinking. This made me think... The thing about this disease is it makes us completely unthinking and shells of who we actually are. Aware, kind, loving people drive drunk. We did. It was part of it. So, four years ago I am at an AA mtg and I am trying to decide if I am an alcoholic. There was a 26 year old woman there who shared her experience. She drank like I drank, binge on weekends and mid week, often black out. No consequences though. No legal stuff, no loss of job, no loss of family, etc. I talked with her after the mtg and we kept in touch for about six months. She went back out, then I ended up going back out about a year later. Never talked to her again. December 27 She drives drunk and kills someone. 30 years old now. She lost her job, she lost her freedom, she lost everything, and she now is living with having killed someone. The point is this: I drank and drove. A lot. It was part of my insanity. This story, any story, could be my story. If I ever use or drink again, it is a risk I am taking. Thankful to be home in bed and sober. Some poor soul is sitting in handcuffs right now. That never has to be us again. Ever. Thanks for that reminder! I am so happy to hear about the healing happening for you!
Mld51 - so glad to hear that the assessment was a positive experience and he could see your sincerity. I am so sorry to hear about your friend passing. My heart is with you. Would love to hear more about your friend if you care to share. Stay close.
Maximus - I so appreciate you jumping in with both feet. Fantastic! I struggle connecting with others as well. I have started challenging myself to introduce myself to one person per meeting. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. It's always awkward, but I generally feel better in my chair after having done that. For what it's worth.
Big shoe - your words were spot on re: DUI. We all have choice now and thankfully we are safe. Sorry to hear about your wife's fall. Doesn't sound fun. Love. How active you are.
Cast down - great resolve. Good to hear from you!
Mariah - drinking is just not an option. Words to live by. I have been repeating that to myself as well as "I don't drink or use, no matter what!" That piece is important to me. I have always kept, in the back of my mind, reasons that would be ok to relapse. No matter what. Period. No exceptions. New for me. I appreciated your candor as well regarding DUIs. It is a blessing to be where we are right now.
BBQ - I set my clock to do a meditation your direction three times today. Love!!!!! And I'm glad Mr. BBQis a good one!!! You deserve lots of love.
Dee - thanks for that resource. I used it today and it was very helpful.
Starsnskies - congrats on day 40!!!!
Going to bed sober. That's a day well lived. The rest is just icing.
Love!!!
Dax
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,837
Dearest Copper! Aw! You poor thing ( hug) I hope you didn't drink but if you did please come back right away, don't go off the deep end! I hope you're safe tonight, I'm thinking about you xoxo. You're a sweetheart and you don't deserve the treatment you're getting, but it won't last forever, we're here for you.
Castdown: hello and thanks for the message you left me while I was away, that was really sweet!
BBQ: glad you're ok!! Xoxo
Mld: sorry to hear about your friend <3
Shannon: ohhhh! I really hope you get that job! Sending positive energy your way! Good story too
Mariahgayle: thanks so much for sharing, I know someone who got a manslaughter charge drinking and driving, very scary stuff for sure.
Stars: nice job on the 40 days!
Dax: sorry to hear you're having a rough week! Asking for help can be hard for sure, but you always give us all so much, take some back for yourself, I love your posts, each one has so much in it, let us help you too xoxo
Today I spent the majority of the day exhausted and trying not to engage with my AV, at one point I was nearly salivating over the thought of wine, I didn't almost drink or anything, but it got to the point I had to go on autopilot and barely think about anything at all so I wouldn't think about wine, this was the first bad craving I've had in about a week.
But I want to be sober more than I want a drink. I may be tired and grumpy, but I've been very productive and I feel good about myself, so thats good,
Ok, I'm exhausted, sorry if I missed anyone in my post.
Goodnight SR brothers and sisters!
Castdown: hello and thanks for the message you left me while I was away, that was really sweet!
BBQ: glad you're ok!! Xoxo
Mld: sorry to hear about your friend <3
Shannon: ohhhh! I really hope you get that job! Sending positive energy your way! Good story too
Mariahgayle: thanks so much for sharing, I know someone who got a manslaughter charge drinking and driving, very scary stuff for sure.
Stars: nice job on the 40 days!
Dax: sorry to hear you're having a rough week! Asking for help can be hard for sure, but you always give us all so much, take some back for yourself, I love your posts, each one has so much in it, let us help you too xoxo
Today I spent the majority of the day exhausted and trying not to engage with my AV, at one point I was nearly salivating over the thought of wine, I didn't almost drink or anything, but it got to the point I had to go on autopilot and barely think about anything at all so I wouldn't think about wine, this was the first bad craving I've had in about a week.
But I want to be sober more than I want a drink. I may be tired and grumpy, but I've been very productive and I feel good about myself, so thats good,
Ok, I'm exhausted, sorry if I missed anyone in my post.
Goodnight SR brothers and sisters!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 1,850
Cooper, I hope you are ok, and today is a better day for you. I've been thinking and praying for you.
BBQ, glad your home now and the procedure went well. You hub sounds like a great one!
MG, thanks for sharing your DUI experiences.
Shannon, good luck on the job.
JSb, huge congrats on 40! Woot woot!
Dax, glad you are doing better. My triggers are mostly anger, depression, and anxiety. I'm still learning how to deal with them.
Hope everyone is doing well, and wishing all a sober today.
Blessings.
BBQ, glad your home now and the procedure went well. You hub sounds like a great one!
MG, thanks for sharing your DUI experiences.
Shannon, good luck on the job.
JSb, huge congrats on 40! Woot woot!
Dax, glad you are doing better. My triggers are mostly anger, depression, and anxiety. I'm still learning how to deal with them.
Hope everyone is doing well, and wishing all a sober today.
Blessings.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Northern Illinos
Posts: 1,757
Good Morning Littermates.
Day 49 for the royal sister triplets - still tickled to be able to say royal!
Thank you all for the prayers and energy - it really helped to know that you care.
Dax, so glad you are back in the fold.
Copper - I pray you are okay - we are here and love you.
Jsbodhi - I hope you were able to get some much needed rest. Keeping the AV at bay can be exhausting.
Erin - love how you are doing.
Stars - wow - 40!
MariahGayle, thank you and others for sharing your DUI troubles. Yes, but for the grace of God go I. I hope you know that it could be any of us in your situation dealing with a DUI. It is a huge accomplishment to be almost two years dealing with the BAID unit in your car.
We are all handling things in our lives with strength and conviction. If you haven't yet you may want to go back and read some of our posts from December. Boy oh boy. In the moment it may not seem like it but we are really making progress.
I know that I would not be here if it wasn't for a supportive husband, a few friend and the incredible love and support of this litter.
I just want to start this day by saying a big "Thank You" to each of you - listening and talking with you has taught me so much nonetheless of which is unconditional family love.
Day 49 for the royal sister triplets - still tickled to be able to say royal!
Thank you all for the prayers and energy - it really helped to know that you care.
Dax, so glad you are back in the fold.
Copper - I pray you are okay - we are here and love you.
Jsbodhi - I hope you were able to get some much needed rest. Keeping the AV at bay can be exhausting.
Erin - love how you are doing.
Stars - wow - 40!
MariahGayle, thank you and others for sharing your DUI troubles. Yes, but for the grace of God go I. I hope you know that it could be any of us in your situation dealing with a DUI. It is a huge accomplishment to be almost two years dealing with the BAID unit in your car.
We are all handling things in our lives with strength and conviction. If you haven't yet you may want to go back and read some of our posts from December. Boy oh boy. In the moment it may not seem like it but we are really making progress.
I know that I would not be here if it wasn't for a supportive husband, a few friend and the incredible love and support of this litter.
I just want to start this day by saying a big "Thank You" to each of you - listening and talking with you has taught me so much nonetheless of which is unconditional family love.
Don't Blink
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 342
Good morning everyone.
Glad to hear things went well B. Hope you get some rest today.
Glad you're back around Dax and relieved you feel like you're getting through this rough patch.
I hope you're ok copper. Look forward to hearing from you soon.
I'm so sorry for your loss mld ♡
Much love. Ttyl. Off to work.
Glad to hear things went well B. Hope you get some rest today.
Glad you're back around Dax and relieved you feel like you're getting through this rough patch.
I hope you're ok copper. Look forward to hearing from you soon.
I'm so sorry for your loss mld ♡
Much love. Ttyl. Off to work.
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