Class of August 2014 Part 3
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 20
Hi gang!
I joined the forum recently and also quit drinking this month. Been feeling a little sad and sorry for myself tonight, still battling some aches and pains and getting randomly teary about my state.
Thought I'd pop in and say howdy and cheer myself up with like minded company.
I joined the forum recently and also quit drinking this month. Been feeling a little sad and sorry for myself tonight, still battling some aches and pains and getting randomly teary about my state.
Thought I'd pop in and say howdy and cheer myself up with like minded company.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 1,462
Lulu, hoping you made it home with no stops. I know the feeling all too well. There have been times where I have literally cried and yelled "no" to myself.
Ginger, I think it's awesome that you can respond to so many posts. It's very difficult to do that on the app bc you can't (that I know of) to check on names/details. Not weird at all, very sweet and appreciated
Today will be one week for me. Honestly, I have moments where I already decide that I will drink again... And soon. But once I come on here and read, my perspective changes, and if I post, it feel even stronger. I'm not an AAer so this support is invaluable to me. Thank you.
Last year, I drank on Saturday of Labor Day weekend, breaking a 43 days of sober time. I know what did it, I was looking forward to doing some cleaning and decorating, it was a 3 day weekend that I had been waiting for, but I felt blah and unmotivated for anything. An instantaneous thought told me that a few beers will perk me up and get me into my domestic tasks. Not sure if it did, I just know that I went on automatic pilot and here I am a year later, with a year of stops and starts coming no where close to 43 days again. A few drinks, just one night, just to perk me up, I deserve it, it will be ok--- never works- all lies. I started out as a social drinker like many of you but as I got older and with my children and career, my drinking has shifted to actually preferring to drink alone. My triggers are solitude and certain "feelings" more than a holiday or a party or a social scene. But believe me I can relate to that too, I drank heavily in my 20s and spent more time in bars than Id like to admit.
Off to work and hopefully a run after work. It's terribly hot where I live and by the end of the day it's hard, but I really need to get a couple of runs I'm during the week. Plus it really helps with cravings!
Have a great day everyone, stay sober, fight the AV and remember it's very, very worth it
Ginger, I think it's awesome that you can respond to so many posts. It's very difficult to do that on the app bc you can't (that I know of) to check on names/details. Not weird at all, very sweet and appreciated
Today will be one week for me. Honestly, I have moments where I already decide that I will drink again... And soon. But once I come on here and read, my perspective changes, and if I post, it feel even stronger. I'm not an AAer so this support is invaluable to me. Thank you.
Last year, I drank on Saturday of Labor Day weekend, breaking a 43 days of sober time. I know what did it, I was looking forward to doing some cleaning and decorating, it was a 3 day weekend that I had been waiting for, but I felt blah and unmotivated for anything. An instantaneous thought told me that a few beers will perk me up and get me into my domestic tasks. Not sure if it did, I just know that I went on automatic pilot and here I am a year later, with a year of stops and starts coming no where close to 43 days again. A few drinks, just one night, just to perk me up, I deserve it, it will be ok--- never works- all lies. I started out as a social drinker like many of you but as I got older and with my children and career, my drinking has shifted to actually preferring to drink alone. My triggers are solitude and certain "feelings" more than a holiday or a party or a social scene. But believe me I can relate to that too, I drank heavily in my 20s and spent more time in bars than Id like to admit.
Off to work and hopefully a run after work. It's terribly hot where I live and by the end of the day it's hard, but I really need to get a couple of runs I'm during the week. Plus it really helps with cravings!
Have a great day everyone, stay sober, fight the AV and remember it's very, very worth it
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,403
Hi Jc and any other newcomers. Too many posts to reply individually to butjust want to thank advbikr for his insightful post.
Day 7. Day 7. I need to count because every day is a challenge. That Av never stops. And every day is a triumph when I beat it
Day 7. Day 7. I need to count because every day is a challenge. That Av never stops. And every day is a triumph when I beat it
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 242
Wow, a lot of great posts and advice here. Still feeling off since those drinks the other night. Time will help, but I need to remember that I don't want to go through this again. No matter what happens, or how much the AV lies to me. Its really not worth it. Glad to see everyone posting, and doing well. I'm an older person here, so let me just say each time I drink, then quit, is a horrible strain on my body.I think it gets harder to regroup as you age, but its surely bad for anyone. I have other health issues as well, so contiuning this crazy cycle is just really plain insanity . Yet it seems to have a terrible hold on me even knowing all this. That's the insanity part of it, and the baffling part as well. I'm going to have to work really hard to arrest this, and I'm willing to fight the good fight, do whatever it takes. I want my life back. Sorry for the long post, just really needed to put this out there. I'm crying as I type, because I'm so freakin scared of this disease.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: New York
Posts: 3,241
Welcome JC!
I've had two very vivid dreams that I remember in the past two nights. I wonder/hope if that means anything about my sleep getting better.
I am babysitting my niece today so I'm going to need to be strong and get through a full day with three kiddos (and my two were up early and are cranky already at 730, shocker). I'll be checking in lots...
Day 9!
I've had two very vivid dreams that I remember in the past two nights. I wonder/hope if that means anything about my sleep getting better.
I am babysitting my niece today so I'm going to need to be strong and get through a full day with three kiddos (and my two were up early and are cranky already at 730, shocker). I'll be checking in lots...
Day 9!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: New York
Posts: 3,241
Rah - AV is Addictive Voice.
'Addictive Voice Recognition Technique® (AVRT®) is described as the simple lore of self-recovery in a very basic, no-guff no fluff format. The AV is defined as any thought or feeling that supports drinking or using, now or in the future.'
For me, AV says things like, "You don't have a problem, one drink won't hurt you. Go ahead, have a drink. YOU DESERVE IT."
'Addictive Voice Recognition Technique® (AVRT®) is described as the simple lore of self-recovery in a very basic, no-guff no fluff format. The AV is defined as any thought or feeling that supports drinking or using, now or in the future.'
For me, AV says things like, "You don't have a problem, one drink won't hurt you. Go ahead, have a drink. YOU DESERVE IT."
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 242
My husband doesn't have this alcohol problem, he really doesn't understand why people can't just put it down, or moderate. He doesn't even believe its a disease it all. He says its lack of willpower, and just plain old being selfish! I wouldn't wish this disease on anyone, but he truly doesn't get it.
My drinking has escalted in the past nine years. I never ever dreamed I would be this bad. I started out a a social drinker for many years. So yes, this is a progressive disease, and it scares me.
My drinking has escalted in the past nine years. I never ever dreamed I would be this bad. I started out a a social drinker for many years. So yes, this is a progressive disease, and it scares me.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Illinois
Posts: 7
Hello Rah,
"AV" is addictive voice. It is a term used by Rational Recovery. They define it as follows...
"Addictive Voice (AV): Any thinking, in words and images, that directs, supports or suggests the possible future use of alcohol and other drugs."
I can't post links yet, but if you go to the Rational Recovery main page and look at the upper right column, you'll see a link to the "internet crash course". Many, including myself, have found it useful.
I also read his book, but to tell you the truth, the crash course is really enough to get his point across.
Good luck!
"AV" is addictive voice. It is a term used by Rational Recovery. They define it as follows...
"Addictive Voice (AV): Any thinking, in words and images, that directs, supports or suggests the possible future use of alcohol and other drugs."
I can't post links yet, but if you go to the Rational Recovery main page and look at the upper right column, you'll see a link to the "internet crash course". Many, including myself, have found it useful.
I also read his book, but to tell you the truth, the crash course is really enough to get his point across.
Good luck!
Last edited by Roy7; 08-27-2014 at 04:56 AM. Reason: typo
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 625
Everyone's posts are so helpful!! They make me realize that I am not alone in this. I'm starting day 5 and like many of you, I have an AV that I need to learn to ignore/manage. I also want to break the cycle I have been caught in for nearly four years. Have a great day!!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 522
rah-the AV stands for the addictive voice. Separating the wants and desires of our addiction vs. the "real us", our rational minds, can be very helpful in recovery.
"People with addictions are usually “of two minds.” That is, one side of them knows they have a problem and is contemplating stopping, and the other side wants to continue the behavior. Speaking for the “old self” that wants to continue the addictive behavior is the “addiction voice.” The “addiction voice” is very demanding and manipulative and thinks in the short term very much like a child; “I want what I want when I want it.” It speaks for a more primitive part of the brain that desires to only repeat behaviors that provide immediate pleasure regardless of the long term consequences."
(Confronting the Addiction Voice on the Road to Recovery | Mad In America as 08/27/2014)
Good morning! Last night I told my husband that if I couldn't get a full night of sleep I would have to cut out all caffeine to see if it would help.
His eyes got huge and he just said "whut." I think he was considering getting a hotel room for himself and the kids for a few days. That probably would have been wise. Fortunately, it didn't have to come to that. I got a full 7 hours of sleep. Look out co-workers!
"People with addictions are usually “of two minds.” That is, one side of them knows they have a problem and is contemplating stopping, and the other side wants to continue the behavior. Speaking for the “old self” that wants to continue the addictive behavior is the “addiction voice.” The “addiction voice” is very demanding and manipulative and thinks in the short term very much like a child; “I want what I want when I want it.” It speaks for a more primitive part of the brain that desires to only repeat behaviors that provide immediate pleasure regardless of the long term consequences."
(Confronting the Addiction Voice on the Road to Recovery | Mad In America as 08/27/2014)
Good morning! Last night I told my husband that if I couldn't get a full night of sleep I would have to cut out all caffeine to see if it would help.
His eyes got huge and he just said "whut." I think he was considering getting a hotel room for himself and the kids for a few days. That probably would have been wise. Fortunately, it didn't have to come to that. I got a full 7 hours of sleep. Look out co-workers!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,403
Originally Posted by dingodog 
Wow, a lot of great posts and advice here. Still feeling off since those drinks the other night. Time will help, but I need to remember that I don't want to go through this again. No matter what happens, or how much the AV lies to me. Its really not worth it. Glad to see everyone posting, and doing well. I'm an older person here, so let me just say each time I drink, then quit, is a horrible strain on my body.I think it gets harder to regroup as you age, but its surely bad for anyone. I have other health issues as well, so contiuning this crazy cycle is just really plain insanity . Yet it seems to have a terrible hold on me even knowing all this. That's the insanity part of it, and the baffling part as well. I'm going to have to work really hard to arrest this, and I'm willing to fight the good fight, do whatever it takes. I want my life back. Sorry for the long post, just really needed to put this out there. I'm crying as I type, because I'm so freakin scared of this disease.
That was me 7 days ago. I will never forget that night, drinking and crying alone. Petrified that I was killing myself, worried my 10 year old son wont have a mum...and yet I still poured myself another glass of wine.
Its a terrible terrible disease. The only way we beat this is not to pick up that first drink. So simple but yet the most difficult thing to do.
Hang in there. You know it will get better every day. Don't quit. Its not too late
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,403
Originally Posted by Applekat
Welcome JC!
I've had two very vivid dreams that I remember in the past two nights. I wonder/hope if that means anything about my sleep getting better.
I am babysitting my niece today so I'm going to need to be strong and get through a full day with three kiddos (and my two were up early and are cranky already at 730, shocker). I'll be checking in lots...
Day 9!
I've had two very vivid dreams that I remember in the past two nights. I wonder/hope if that means anything about my sleep getting better.
I am babysitting my niece today so I'm going to need to be strong and get through a full day with three kiddos (and my two were up early and are cranky already at 730, shocker). I'll be checking in lots...
Day 9!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Illinois
Posts: 7
Thanks for the excellent link, Choobie. I hope everyone will give it a read.
Reminded me of another group worth checking out- Smart Recovery. It uses a lot of the same ideas as Rational Recovery, but in a less confrontational way.
Reminded me of another group worth checking out- Smart Recovery. It uses a lot of the same ideas as Rational Recovery, but in a less confrontational way.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,403
Originally Posted by rah555
Everyone's posts are so helpful!! They make me realize that I am not alone in this. I'm starting day 5 and like many of you, I have an AV that I need to learn to ignore/manage. I also want to break the cycle I have been caught in for nearly four years. Have a great day!!
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
