Class of September 2013 - Part 29
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,467
Checking in after a great couple of days with my girls and I also got to see my mum today for the first time in nearly a year, it felt strange to be with my daughters, my sister and brother in law and my mum all together but I felt immense gratitude that it was possible because I am sober.
Went to a meeting yesterday morning and its helped my thinking, still have to learn to live in the moment and not get too wrapped up in the future, Im saying the serenity prayer a lot and it helps me somehow, got another hospital appointment through for the 29th April but Im trying to live as healthy as I can now and seeing it still as a wake up call to change.
Glad to see you back UI.
Happy Easter all! x
Went to a meeting yesterday morning and its helped my thinking, still have to learn to live in the moment and not get too wrapped up in the future, Im saying the serenity prayer a lot and it helps me somehow, got another hospital appointment through for the 29th April but Im trying to live as healthy as I can now and seeing it still as a wake up call to change.
Glad to see you back UI.
Happy Easter all! x
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,479
Good to hear from you UI.
Gotta admit I physically winced at your post, cos I've been there...did not end well....
but I sincerely hope you're right and that it works out for you
D
Gotta admit I physically winced at your post, cos I've been there...did not end well....
but I sincerely hope you're right and that it works out for you
D
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Strailya
Posts: 8,029
Originally Posted by LillianGish 
I love biting off the chocolate bunny's ears. Here....have a cyber bite my friends!!!
Glad to see that you're full on into the Easter celebrations. I have completely over indulged in Easter eggs, bunnies and anything vaguely Easterish with chocolate
Ooh, my poor scales !! I am sure there is something Freudian about biting off the ears of bunnies
Keep enjoying your Easter festivities !!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Strailya
Posts: 8,029
Originally Posted by Uninvited
Happy Easter!
Just checking in to say hi and let you know I'm doing great. Feeling better than I have in years. Maybe I never was an alcoholic? I've been drinking on Fridays, but only 4 beers. Which my old self would have said, "What the hell is the point of drinking only 4 beers?" And truthfully, I don't even really get a buzz but it relaxes me a little and gives me something to look forward to. The compulsion has completely changed though, and I don't really think about drinking the rest of the week. Except on a rare occasion I do get a thought, and it's typically when I felt I have done something particularly great at work and I deserve a drink. But it passes fast.
I can't explain it. I certainly drank enough for long enough to be in the alcoholic category. 13ish beers a night for 28 years or so. It's possible this will all spin out of control again soon. But it doesn't feel that way. Feels very stable. My thoughts about alcohol seem to have completely changed. And that never would have been possible without you guys. For which I am eternally grateful. You are often in my thoughts, and Ill try to check in again in a few months to let you know how I'm making out.
I am noticing that being sober is completely changing my personality and what I like to do with my time. I feel like I'm approaching 50 and only just now starting to grow up. Stay strong.
Just checking in to say hi and let you know I'm doing great. Feeling better than I have in years. Maybe I never was an alcoholic? I've been drinking on Fridays, but only 4 beers. Which my old self would have said, "What the hell is the point of drinking only 4 beers?" And truthfully, I don't even really get a buzz but it relaxes me a little and gives me something to look forward to. The compulsion has completely changed though, and I don't really think about drinking the rest of the week. Except on a rare occasion I do get a thought, and it's typically when I felt I have done something particularly great at work and I deserve a drink. But it passes fast.
I can't explain it. I certainly drank enough for long enough to be in the alcoholic category. 13ish beers a night for 28 years or so. It's possible this will all spin out of control again soon. But it doesn't feel that way. Feels very stable. My thoughts about alcohol seem to have completely changed. And that never would have been possible without you guys. For which I am eternally grateful. You are often in my thoughts, and Ill try to check in again in a few months to let you know how I'm making out.
I am noticing that being sober is completely changing my personality and what I like to do with my time. I feel like I'm approaching 50 and only just now starting to grow up. Stay strong.
Great to hear from you and that is all is going well at the moment !
Have a great Easter ! I am glad there has been a change in your outlook on alcohol. I hope that is a long lasting change ! The same for me in that my outlook on drinking has changed. However, I simply dont want to drink anymore. Alcohol doesnt hold any attraction for me.
Anyway, good for you and pls stay close !
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Soberspace
Posts: 591
I dreamt of hatching crocodile eggs.
Also, forgot to tell about the course dinner last thursday in Athens after the exam.
Sat next to a woman from Spain, she didn't drink either. And we were having a good time talking about politics and people, laughing at contemporary folly such as the situation in Russia-Ukraine, economic crisis in Europe and organised crime etc.
Giving up drinking felt like two steps behind the end of the world back in september but I feel that I have achieved some emotional distance to drinking apart from just days, weeks and months. And that's what matters more than just time.
Also, forgot to tell about the course dinner last thursday in Athens after the exam.
Sat next to a woman from Spain, she didn't drink either. And we were having a good time talking about politics and people, laughing at contemporary folly such as the situation in Russia-Ukraine, economic crisis in Europe and organised crime etc.
Giving up drinking felt like two steps behind the end of the world back in september but I feel that I have achieved some emotional distance to drinking apart from just days, weeks and months. And that's what matters more than just time.
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 5,554
Ate too much yesterday. Made a nice roast bonneless leg of lamb, and my neighbor sent me her ham bone later, with loads of ham still on it. I will make a soup and share it with her. But, hubby and I nibbled some of that ham last night. I see a long walk in my future today. Nibbled on way too much leftover candy as well. Kids were happy. Neither believes in the bunny anymore, but they wanted a basketful of sweets nonetheless. And they got it. A few toys for ds too.
It was a cool but lovely day, and today looks the same so far. So nice to finally have green grass in the yard!
Hoping everyone is well.
It was a cool but lovely day, and today looks the same so far. So nice to finally have green grass in the yard!
Hoping everyone is well.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 1,534
Hi All! A belated Happy Easter to everyone!
My iPad is on the blink so I haven't been around much lately. I hope to get it checked or replaced tomorrow then I will be back.
UI, I am so happy you posted! I really have missed hearing from you. I hope your new lifestyle will continue to work for you. Please keep checking in with us.
LG, your comments about the ham cracked me up. It's true, ham is a real conversation starter. Our son's guitar teacher rhapsodized about ham for several minutes the other day until I practically pushed him out the front door.
Work, how lovely that you had such a fun time with the lady of Spain! It really is a boost when we can connect with others and enjoy ourselves without "needing" alcohol.
Spring has sprung here in Wisconsin. We had our windows open yesterday and our daffodils are blooming. But I am not going to wash the kids' snowpants till June, just in case....
Everyone have a terrific day!
My iPad is on the blink so I haven't been around much lately. I hope to get it checked or replaced tomorrow then I will be back.
UI, I am so happy you posted! I really have missed hearing from you. I hope your new lifestyle will continue to work for you. Please keep checking in with us.
LG, your comments about the ham cracked me up. It's true, ham is a real conversation starter. Our son's guitar teacher rhapsodized about ham for several minutes the other day until I practically pushed him out the front door.
Work, how lovely that you had such a fun time with the lady of Spain! It really is a boost when we can connect with others and enjoy ourselves without "needing" alcohol.
Spring has sprung here in Wisconsin. We had our windows open yesterday and our daffodils are blooming. But I am not going to wash the kids' snowpants till June, just in case....
Everyone have a terrific day!
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 776
~~Food For Thought ~ Thank God It's Monday Edition~~
~~Get Rid of The Distractions~~
Welcome to the beginning of the best week of your life! Today’s Daily Word is dedicated to getting rid of distractions!
One of my mentors once told me that the reason why most people don’t accomplish their dreams and aspirations is because they allow themselves to be sidetracked by secondary activity! Somehow we believe that everything is important and because of this we give everything the same focus and energy instead of putting first things first! Add to that the fact that many of us have more than one aspiration, so we have the tendency to try to do it all at once! Big mistake!!
You can either give 20% to five things or 100% to one at a time! Doing the latter will assure that you accomplish what’s most important in the most effective manner possible and will nine times out of ten yield the other four things with so much ease!! Life is not easy, but we do make it more difficult than it has to be!! It’s alright to have your cake and eat it, but make sure you’re not being greedy, stuffing your face, jeopardizing it all! Dream big, but focus at one thing at a time!! Get Rid of the Distractions!-Ash’Cash
~Healthy Snacks~
“No life ever grows great until it is focused, dedicated and disciplined.”-Unknown
“The successful man is the average man, extremely focused.”-Unknown
“Success is focusing the full power of all you are on what you have a burning desire to achieve.” -Wilfred Peterson
“Keep focused on the substantive issues. To make a decision means having to go through one door and closing all others.”-Abraham Zaleznik
“Our thoughts create our reality – where we put our focus is the direction we tend to go.”-Peter McWilliams
“One reason so few of us achieve what we truly want is that we never direct our focus; we never concentrate our power. Most people dabble their way through life, never deciding to master anything in particular.”
Anthony Robbins
“The jack-of-all-trades seldom is good at any. Concentrate all of your efforts on one definite chief aim.”-Napoleon Hill
“Concentrate your energies, your thoughts and your capital…. The wise man puts all his eggs in one basket and watches the basket.”-Andrew Carnegie
~~Get Rid of The Distractions~~
Welcome to the beginning of the best week of your life! Today’s Daily Word is dedicated to getting rid of distractions!
One of my mentors once told me that the reason why most people don’t accomplish their dreams and aspirations is because they allow themselves to be sidetracked by secondary activity! Somehow we believe that everything is important and because of this we give everything the same focus and energy instead of putting first things first! Add to that the fact that many of us have more than one aspiration, so we have the tendency to try to do it all at once! Big mistake!!
You can either give 20% to five things or 100% to one at a time! Doing the latter will assure that you accomplish what’s most important in the most effective manner possible and will nine times out of ten yield the other four things with so much ease!! Life is not easy, but we do make it more difficult than it has to be!! It’s alright to have your cake and eat it, but make sure you’re not being greedy, stuffing your face, jeopardizing it all! Dream big, but focus at one thing at a time!! Get Rid of the Distractions!-Ash’Cash
~Healthy Snacks~
“No life ever grows great until it is focused, dedicated and disciplined.”-Unknown
“The successful man is the average man, extremely focused.”-Unknown
“Success is focusing the full power of all you are on what you have a burning desire to achieve.” -Wilfred Peterson
“Keep focused on the substantive issues. To make a decision means having to go through one door and closing all others.”-Abraham Zaleznik
“Our thoughts create our reality – where we put our focus is the direction we tend to go.”-Peter McWilliams
“One reason so few of us achieve what we truly want is that we never direct our focus; we never concentrate our power. Most people dabble their way through life, never deciding to master anything in particular.”
Anthony Robbins
“The jack-of-all-trades seldom is good at any. Concentrate all of your efforts on one definite chief aim.”-Napoleon Hill
“Concentrate your energies, your thoughts and your capital…. The wise man puts all his eggs in one basket and watches the basket.”-Andrew Carnegie
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Strailya
Posts: 8,029
Originally Posted by workoholic
I dreamt of hatching crocodile eggs.
Giving up drinking felt like two steps behind the end of the world back in september but I feel that I have achieved some emotional distance to drinking apart from just days, weeks and months. And that's what matters more than just time.
Giving up drinking felt like two steps behind the end of the world back in september but I feel that I have achieved some emotional distance to drinking apart from just days, weeks and months. And that's what matters more than just time.
I feel the same about drinking. Not sure about the crocodile eggs. Maybe your maternal instinct is coming to the surface
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 776
~Food For Thought ~ Thoughtful Tuesday Edition~
~How 2 Get Out of Your Own Way~
~Note~
This piece really resonated with my this morning and I wanted to share these thoughts with you all I can identify with all these points to some degree and see my journey in each point. I challenge you to read each point carefully and see if it applies to anything in your life presently and look to actively change it. I've been tweaking my mission statement and blueprint and this week I'm spending time every evening doing so. This has been right on time. Have a great day folks!!!
~The Meal~
1. Face Facts: YOU may just be the bump in the road that's slowing you down.
Often the most difficult step in getting out of one's own way is recognizing that you are indeed, in it. When you encounter problems in achieving your goals, carefully consider whether or not you are the source of those problems.
2. You can do anything you want. However, you may not be able to do everything you want.
Most of the time we get in our own ways by trying to do too much all at once. By working hard at trying to do everything we end up accomplishing very little. Concentrating on one or two projects at a time will actually increase your chances getting what you want.
3. To get a clear picture, you've got to focus.
Once you know which project(s) you will tackle, you must focus on what it will take to really do those projects. Create step-by-step plans for what you will do and when you will do them.
4. If it's on paper, it's a plan. If it's in your head, it's a dream.
Many are reluctant to actually put their plans down on paper. Putting plans to paper is the first physical step to take towards achieving one's desires. Without a written plan most people will start a project but soon be distracted by the many little things that pop up.
5. Just because you're moving doesn't mean you're getting ahead.
A sure sign of a person getting in their own way is when they are working very hard, but not getting any closer to achieving their goals. (This is also one of the most frequent effects of not having a written plan.)
To move forward you must take the proper actions at the proper times.
6. Not choosing IS choosing.
Another roadblock we create is by over-thinking our options to the point of inactivity. A better way to say this is too much analysis by paralysis. "I could do A, B, or C" we tell ourselves. "I better think about it." Then we proceed to ponder. . . but we never actually decide. What we're really doing, though, is deciding to do nothing.
But guess what? If you do nothing, you get nothing.
7. Concentrate on what will work.
Some people are very good at finding all of the reasons why something won't work. So good that they talk themselves out of even trying. Don't compound potential negatives, compound the positives and concentrate on why things will work for you!
8. If it's not working, STOP DOING IT!
One definition of insanity reads: "Doing the same thing over and over, but expecting a different result each time." I tend to think of that more as a definition of humanity.
Whether caused by determination, pride, or mere stubbornness, many have trouble recognizing and admitting that things aren't working. If that's you, adopt a new motto: "Just don't do it!" When things stop working, stop doing them, readjust, and move on.
9. When you just don't know, get help.
We can't know everything. We can't always solve everything. When that's the case, get help. There are businesses, counselors, consultants, and coaches who can work with you on almost any trouble spot you may encounter. Use them.
10. If it doesn't make you happy, don't do it.
Working towards your goals may not always be easy. You may not have fun every moment as you wend your way but, overall, you should enjoy what you are doing because it's what you want to do. If that's not true then you definitely need to re-evaluate your goals or how you are pursuing them.
~How 2 Get Out of Your Own Way~
~Note~
This piece really resonated with my this morning and I wanted to share these thoughts with you all I can identify with all these points to some degree and see my journey in each point. I challenge you to read each point carefully and see if it applies to anything in your life presently and look to actively change it. I've been tweaking my mission statement and blueprint and this week I'm spending time every evening doing so. This has been right on time. Have a great day folks!!!
~The Meal~
1. Face Facts: YOU may just be the bump in the road that's slowing you down.
Often the most difficult step in getting out of one's own way is recognizing that you are indeed, in it. When you encounter problems in achieving your goals, carefully consider whether or not you are the source of those problems.
2. You can do anything you want. However, you may not be able to do everything you want.
Most of the time we get in our own ways by trying to do too much all at once. By working hard at trying to do everything we end up accomplishing very little. Concentrating on one or two projects at a time will actually increase your chances getting what you want.
3. To get a clear picture, you've got to focus.
Once you know which project(s) you will tackle, you must focus on what it will take to really do those projects. Create step-by-step plans for what you will do and when you will do them.
4. If it's on paper, it's a plan. If it's in your head, it's a dream.
Many are reluctant to actually put their plans down on paper. Putting plans to paper is the first physical step to take towards achieving one's desires. Without a written plan most people will start a project but soon be distracted by the many little things that pop up.
5. Just because you're moving doesn't mean you're getting ahead.
A sure sign of a person getting in their own way is when they are working very hard, but not getting any closer to achieving their goals. (This is also one of the most frequent effects of not having a written plan.)
To move forward you must take the proper actions at the proper times.
6. Not choosing IS choosing.
Another roadblock we create is by over-thinking our options to the point of inactivity. A better way to say this is too much analysis by paralysis. "I could do A, B, or C" we tell ourselves. "I better think about it." Then we proceed to ponder. . . but we never actually decide. What we're really doing, though, is deciding to do nothing.
But guess what? If you do nothing, you get nothing.
7. Concentrate on what will work.
Some people are very good at finding all of the reasons why something won't work. So good that they talk themselves out of even trying. Don't compound potential negatives, compound the positives and concentrate on why things will work for you!
8. If it's not working, STOP DOING IT!
One definition of insanity reads: "Doing the same thing over and over, but expecting a different result each time." I tend to think of that more as a definition of humanity.
Whether caused by determination, pride, or mere stubbornness, many have trouble recognizing and admitting that things aren't working. If that's you, adopt a new motto: "Just don't do it!" When things stop working, stop doing them, readjust, and move on.
9. When you just don't know, get help.
We can't know everything. We can't always solve everything. When that's the case, get help. There are businesses, counselors, consultants, and coaches who can work with you on almost any trouble spot you may encounter. Use them.
10. If it doesn't make you happy, don't do it.
Working towards your goals may not always be easy. You may not have fun every moment as you wend your way but, overall, you should enjoy what you are doing because it's what you want to do. If that's not true then you definitely need to re-evaluate your goals or how you are pursuing them.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 1,178
Hey everyone! Just wanted to give a quick post-Easter update.
My youngest dd's team took FIRST place in the GOLD DIVISION at the tournament ... that means they won it all!! Yay! She's come SO FAR in that past year. It's crazy. To see her play now compared to how she played last fall, you honestly wouldn't think it's the same girl.
And my 17 year-old had a BLAST at prom! She looked beyond gorgeous, and she and her bf even got their picture in the paper! She made great memories that I know she'll cherish.
Easter was nice here, too. I cooked, the weather was beautiful and warm, we took a couple walks, family hung out and laughed together, and dh and I went to my AA meeting in the evening. Overall, it was perfect.
Speaking of dh ... he totally made me cry Saturday night, in a good way. He found a song that he wanted to play for me, so he showed me this video. Especially that first verse depicts so much the pain I felt when I was in the depths of my addiction, and his incredible love for me desire to stand by me even then. I have no idea why I'm so blessed, but I thank God for that man every single day. He could so easily have done better than me.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oozQ4yV__Vw
My youngest dd's team took FIRST place in the GOLD DIVISION at the tournament ... that means they won it all!! Yay! She's come SO FAR in that past year. It's crazy. To see her play now compared to how she played last fall, you honestly wouldn't think it's the same girl.
And my 17 year-old had a BLAST at prom! She looked beyond gorgeous, and she and her bf even got their picture in the paper! She made great memories that I know she'll cherish.
Easter was nice here, too. I cooked, the weather was beautiful and warm, we took a couple walks, family hung out and laughed together, and dh and I went to my AA meeting in the evening. Overall, it was perfect.
Speaking of dh ... he totally made me cry Saturday night, in a good way. He found a song that he wanted to play for me, so he showed me this video. Especially that first verse depicts so much the pain I felt when I was in the depths of my addiction, and his incredible love for me desire to stand by me even then. I have no idea why I'm so blessed, but I thank God for that man every single day. He could so easily have done better than me.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oozQ4yV__Vw
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,467
Hi all, had a day with my mum and sister at the seaside, walking and taking in the beautiful scenery, went for a coffee and just got in from walking sisters two dogs on in the village where I grew up- even saw the primary school I went to as a child. I should be happy but for some reason Ive felt immense sadness and at times came close to tears, seeing how life 'should/could' have been had I not drank away 18 years is hard to take. Im sentimental and the walk brought many memories back that id forgotten.
It all seems so much of a mountain I have to climb to be where I should be at this stage of my life that at times it seems impossible. I know I should keep it in the day and I know drink is not an option anymore and Im trying- God knows Im trying, went to an AA meeting last night but just felt empty, hoping to talk things through with my sponsor/friend later. Its frustrating feeling this way when my mum is visiting because I only see her once or twice for a week in a year.
Got my girls tomorrow and taking them to the cinema so hope this feeling passes and I feel better by then.
It all seems so much of a mountain I have to climb to be where I should be at this stage of my life that at times it seems impossible. I know I should keep it in the day and I know drink is not an option anymore and Im trying- God knows Im trying, went to an AA meeting last night but just felt empty, hoping to talk things through with my sponsor/friend later. Its frustrating feeling this way when my mum is visiting because I only see her once or twice for a week in a year.
Got my girls tomorrow and taking them to the cinema so hope this feeling passes and I feel better by then.
Velveteen Rabbit
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: San Diego, Cali
Posts: 2,661
Originally Posted by 1stepup
Hi all, had a day with my mum and sister at the seaside, walking and taking in the beautiful scenery, went for a coffee and just got in from walking sisters two dogs on in the village where I grew up- even saw the primary school I went to as a child. I should be happy but for some reason Ive felt immense sadness and at times came close to tears, seeing how life 'should/could' have been had I not drank away 18 years is hard to take. Im sentimental and the walk brought many memories back that id forgotten.
It all seems so much of a mountain I have to climb to be where I should be at this stage of my life that at times it seems impossible. I know I should keep it in the day and I know drink is not an option anymore and Im trying- God knows Im trying, went to an AA meeting last night but just felt empty, hoping to talk things through with my sponsor/friend later. Its frustrating feeling this way when my mum is visiting because I only see her once or twice for a week in a year.
Got my girls tomorrow and taking them to the cinema so hope this feeling passes and I feel better by then.
It all seems so much of a mountain I have to climb to be where I should be at this stage of my life that at times it seems impossible. I know I should keep it in the day and I know drink is not an option anymore and Im trying- God knows Im trying, went to an AA meeting last night but just felt empty, hoping to talk things through with my sponsor/friend later. Its frustrating feeling this way when my mum is visiting because I only see her once or twice for a week in a year.
Got my girls tomorrow and taking them to the cinema so hope this feeling passes and I feel better by then.
And to let go of all that responsibility for what could have been, what should have been, is a massive relief to me. We can't change the past. And in fact, I'm not really qualified to judge whether where I'm at right now, isn't EXACTLY where I should be. It just is.
And when I just let all that regret go, like helium balloons out into the lovely Pacific Ocean that I live by, it is comforting to me. To accept the things I cannot change.
I do know that drink is what keeps me from what I would love to be.....no matter what my AV says otherwise. It is what I can change. It holds me back and creates more regret. It doesn't help at all with changing the past, or making me feel better about it. It just furthers the disconnect from reality.
1step, life is usually very long. Some of life's lessons take a really long time too. You have a lot of living to do. So, don't let the blues pull you down.
Big hugs. And BTW, movies always cheer me up. See something uplifting!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,467
Thank you so much Lilian your post has helped lift my mood, I love the image of those helium balloons floating off over the ocean. Im where Im at and I LOVE the serenity prayer and say it a lot especially lately.
Its weird how our moods and feelings can come and go and change just like cravings, my AV loves me regretting the past and worrying about the future. I will try and do my best to live in this moment and be the best version of me I can right NOW.
Yeah Im with you on the movie front they always take me out of myself- if that makes sense?!!
Its weird how our moods and feelings can come and go and change just like cravings, my AV loves me regretting the past and worrying about the future. I will try and do my best to live in this moment and be the best version of me I can right NOW.
Yeah Im with you on the movie front they always take me out of myself- if that makes sense?!!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 1,534
1Step, LG put it beautifully. We can't really know what could have been, all we can deal with is today and how it will impact our future. Sometimes I regret missing some nice moments in my kids' childhoods, either because I was too focused on drinking or nursing my hangovers. But I like to think about what the future might hold, how I might be helpful to others in the months and years to come because of having been there and having done that. I believe God can take any mess and use it for good. I just need to do my part today to not prolong the mess any longer.
I hope your visit with your mom takes on a happier vibe and that your day tomorrow is terrific. You are working hard. Try to be as gentle with yourself as you would with a friend.
so
I hope your visit with your mom takes on a happier vibe and that your day tomorrow is terrific. You are working hard. Try to be as gentle with yourself as you would with a friend.
so
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