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Class Of March 2014 Part 3

Old 03-17-2014, 03:28 AM
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Hi, toddle! I'm up in your time.

Everyone is doing so well - so much great insight here. I love all the stories and the improvement we are all noticing.

I can't stay up, this is me having hot chocolate and toast and going back to bed - just thought I would check in. My fingers aren't cooperating at this hour, so I'm going back to bed. Sober. Day 13 when I get up in two more hours. (It's 3:30 AM here, toddle.)

edit: oops, Hi Shoshie!

Last edited by biminiblue; 03-17-2014 at 03:32 AM. Reason: people in other time zones :)
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Old 03-17-2014, 03:42 AM
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Back atcha Shoshie x
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Old 03-17-2014, 03:59 AM
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Originally Posted by biminiblue View Post
Hi, toddle! I'm up in your time. Everyone is doing so well - so much great insight here. I love all the stories and the improvement we are all noticing. I can't stay up, this is me having hot chocolate and toast and going back to bed - just thought I would check in. My fingers aren't cooperating at this hour, so I'm going back to bed. Sober. Day 13 when I get up in two more hours. (It's 3:30 AM here, toddle.) edit: oops, Hi Shoshie!
Hi Biminiblue, insomnia snack-attacks...I can relate to that! Sorry you can't sleep through, we'll look back on this and laugh when we're going 8 hours straight.

Congratulations on Day 13 bb, stay strong and keep posting. I love our 24/7 rolling thread! x
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Old 03-17-2014, 04:02 AM
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Originally Posted by Shoshie8 View Post
It's on my mind when I wake up, last thing I think about when I go to sleep. And taking up a lot of the day thinking about it too. Probably because I've got some time off right now, but still..

Hi Shoshie, congrats on Day 10!

I know what you mean about being obsessed with sobriety. I am too. Maybe someone well into their sobriety can reassure us that the obsession goes away. I guess at this point I need to be a bit over the top about it, lest I fall back to drinking.
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Old 03-17-2014, 04:23 AM
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Originally Posted by Looking4Help123 View Post
Hi Shoshie, congrats on Day 10! I know what you mean about being obsessed with sobriety. I am too. Maybe someone well into their sobriety can reassure us that the obsession goes away. I guess at this point I need to be a bit over the top about it, lest I fall back to drinking.
Thank-you L4H!

Glad it's not just me then. I tend not to do anything by halves, including drinking, which is why I'm here in the first place.

I don't want sobriety to be an obsession, or a 'project' that sits on top of my life; it has to become a seamless part of it and committed as I am and feel today in this moment, I haven't a clue how that works.

Right now, sobriety reminds me of becoming a new mother for the first time. Completely and utterly responsible for keeping something very precious alive, but with ZERO experience.

Would love to hear how old hands and veterans carry their sobriety day to day.
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Old 03-17-2014, 05:19 AM
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Suppose I had a minor win today. I drove 1000Km's from Melbourne up into the bush and home. Was a long long day, I was working on a Country Fire Radio site in the bushfire zone near Cann River for those who know Aus and some pretty tough 4wd country

Bourbon is my drink of choice I typically buy a half bottle 375ml usually and litre of diet coke as my reward for the day. Some times I go back for a second. Why do I buy a 1/2 bottle because I say its only a couple of drinks and if I buy a bottle I will drink it all so that's how I was moderating. I say wont go back for a second bottle guess what a lot of times I do.

and a bottle after work was nothing to me I do not debilitating hangovers, God I wish I could worst I get is anxiety and blackouts from grog

I was never going to buy a bourbon but I thought just 1 beer. God I could taste it and I had put in a 15 hour day, I deserved it, who would know, I had a few dollars change in ashtray I wont need card. Before I knew it in the car park of bottle shop staring at it.

Well happy to say I didn't was only a little win I am only starting this again but at least something I suppose
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Old 03-17-2014, 05:27 AM
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Close one gorc!! Good job turning around !

That couldn't have been easy. I can only imagine all of the conflicting voices going back and forth. In the past, I've never been successful at turning around. I think hearing these stories helps me see it can be done so, thank you for that!
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Old 03-17-2014, 05:31 AM
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Nice win there Gorc
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Old 03-17-2014, 05:40 AM
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Originally Posted by Looking4Help123 View Post
Nice win there Gorc
AND Thanks Ilya also

Thanks guys. I am sitting here dog tired and I think of the trip I did today I was in car for 12 hours yes and a long day but I work all over Australian in remote areas and seen most of Australian and places most don't go, towers like tops of mountains.

And to think I drive 1 km to a bottle shop because I have not had enough and risk my licence that is reckless ness of the grog

It's depressing. I am not sure if allowed to post pics but if so I will showyou what I am risking just from todays trip ( I have a nice pic of venomous snake I made friends with )
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Old 03-17-2014, 05:41 AM
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Originally Posted by gorc View Post
Suppose I had a minor win today. I drove 1000Km's from Melbourne up into the bush and home. Was a long long day, I was working on a Country Fire Radio site in the bushfire zone near Cann River for those who know Aus and some pretty tough 4wd country Bourbon is my drink of choice I typically buy a half bottle 375ml usually and litre of diet coke as my reward for the day. Some times I go back for a second. Why do I buy a 1/2 bottle because I say its only a couple of drinks and if I buy a bottle I will drink it all so that's how I was moderating. I say wont go back for a second bottle guess what a lot of times I do. and a bottle after work was nothing to me I do not debilitating hangovers, God I wish I could worst I get is anxiety and blackouts from grog I was never going to buy a bourbon but I thought just 1 beer. God I could taste it and I had put in a 15 hour day, I deserved it, who would know, I had a few dollars change in ashtray I wont need card. Before I knew it in the car park of bottle shop staring at it. Well happy to say I didn't was only a little win I am only starting this again but at least something I suppose
Gorc, well done. That sounded like a tough, close call. You must have been tired, thirsty...that was a big win actually. Don't diminish it. Whatever helped you drown out the voice in your head, whatever stopped you stepping out of the 4x4 remember it and hold onto it for next time. Glad you posted x
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Old 03-17-2014, 05:42 AM
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Wow that sounds amazing gorc!! It would be awesome to see pictures.

Maybe you should reward yourself with a nice soak or something good to eat!
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Old 03-17-2014, 05:51 AM
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Originally Posted by gorc View Post
AND Thanks Ilya also

Thanks guys. I am sitting here dog tired and I think of the trip I did today I was in car for 12 hours yes and a long day but I work all over Australian in remote areas and seen most of Australian and places most don't go, towers like tops of mountains.

And to think I drive 1 km to a bottle shop because I have not had enough and risk my licence that is reckless ness of the grog

It's depressing. I am not sure if allowed to post pics but if so I will showyou what I am risking just from todays trip ( I have a nice pic of venomous snake I made friends with )
YES! Snake pictures!

Great job on talking back to your addiction, too. That's a tough one, working and driving alone for long stretches of time. I think the glory of the beauty of the land would help though. Being in the wilderness is a spiritual, healing thing for me. Makes me understand how small and powerless I really am.
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Old 03-17-2014, 05:54 AM
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Originally Posted by Shoshie8 View Post
Morning sober Marchers!

I think I might need to work on not to be so borderline neurotic about how much sleep I am/am not getting, depth of brain fog and just get going.

I'm also trying, and struggling to be honest, to strike a balance between embracing sobriety as a new way of being, nurturing it, being constantly vigilant about drinking triggers and not becoming mentally obsessed with it.

It's on my mind when I wake up, last thing I think about when I go to sleep. And taking up a lot of the day thinking about it too. Probably because I've got some time off right now, but still..

I guess I'd like to feel more comfortable and integrated with my sobriety, like it's ticking over in the background of my life and not dominating my every waking thought. Does it change over time, I wonder? I feel like I'm breaking in a fabulous new pair of shoes

Anyway, hello Day 10! Clear head, blue skies this end.

Have a great sober day x
I've been wondering the same thing. Also did I think about drinking as much as I do not drinking?
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Old 03-17-2014, 05:54 AM
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OK here is a couple of pics I think I have worked out how to post (sorry I had to open a photobucket account). Might reflect on what I risk drinking as no public transport here

Commute


Work site


My Friend Red Bellied Black


So there you go not a typical day but not unusual and I also get chance to take boy with me.

Worth the risk for a drink? No, who said alcholics were smart
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Old 03-17-2014, 05:58 AM
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Day 9. My newsfeed is full of people already up at 6am drinking for St. Patricks Day. I had random urges for a beer last night, but nothing overwhelming. This morning any urge I had to drink was quickly squashed by recalling the events from the holiday last year.. Have a good day, kids.
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Old 03-17-2014, 06:05 AM
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Originally Posted by Noolan View Post
I've been wondering the same thing. Also did I think about drinking as much as I do not drinking?
I definitely think about not drinking far more right now than I did about drinking when I was.

(Unless and until I finished what I had to hand before I'd had enough which didn't happen much. I kept a lot of wine in the house.)

Mindless drinking vs mindful sobriety.
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Old 03-17-2014, 06:07 AM
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Originally Posted by Noolan View Post
Day 9. My newsfeed is full of people already up at 6am drinking for St. Patricks Day. I had random urges for a beer last night, but nothing overwhelming. This morning any urge I had to drink was quickly squashed by recalling the events from the holiday last year.. Have a good day, kids.
Just finished here in Aus news is showing people in major need of a wheel alignment walking home, People fighting, People being sick, People also having fun.

How many will regret it. I know I probably would.

Got to go to bed now guys good luck
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Old 03-17-2014, 06:14 AM
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Gorc, thanks for posting the pics. I want your job. Wait, I want A job. But it would be great if it was driving around Australia working on radio towers and meeting red bellied blacks. But aren't those the really dangerous snakes?

Oh, right. You all have lots of dangerous snakes. I think I'll stay here. No bugs hardly, the only snakey-snakes are non-venomous, and the biggest critter I worry about is a Cougar. Or a bear, but mostly a Cougar. At least I won't accidentally step on one.
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Old 03-17-2014, 06:16 AM
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aack St Patrick's Day.

I forgot.

Well, it wasn't any bigger a drinking holiday for me than any other day. I could do just as much damage on January 9th...or September 4th...you get the idea.

I guess it would be wise to be home before dark today.
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Old 03-17-2014, 06:21 AM
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Originally Posted by Shoshie8 View Post
I definitely think about not drinking far more right now than I did about drinking when I was.

(Unless and until I finished what I had to hand before I'd had enough which didn't happen much. I kept a lot of wine in the house.)

Mindless drinking vs mindful sobriety.
The thing about drinking is we didn't have to think.


AAMOF, isn't that part of the reason for drinking? We can stuff down all the unpleasant emotions and reactions to perceived hurts and failures that way. Angry? Sad? Bored? Frustrated? Afraid? Worried? Why, here's an instant fix! Rum! Only it doesn't fix stuff, it just makes it worse.
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