Class of March 2013 - Part 20
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Virginia
Posts: 1,133
Joygirl, I'd make you some hot tea and draw you a hot bath if I could! I'm glad your friend gave you a soft place to land.
Try to remember through your pain that that isn't your mom ranting and raving. Looks like her, sounds like her, but nope. Might be small consolation, but I hope small consolation is better than none. Is it possible to check with her doctor about adjusting her meds? Surely there's something they can do to minimize this behavior even if they can't eliminate it. Can you keep a bag ready to go and count on your friend to give you a sanctuary away from home or go to a nearby hotel for the night where you can pamper yourself and regroup if this happens again? Heck, I love an excuse to stay in a hotel. A couple years ago I did it because of fleas. But I don't think the fleas were on any steroids or narcotics. :-)
Take care of yourself above all and rest assured we are here for you. Try to put this out of your mind just for one night. Hugs to you. This too shall pass.
Try to remember through your pain that that isn't your mom ranting and raving. Looks like her, sounds like her, but nope. Might be small consolation, but I hope small consolation is better than none. Is it possible to check with her doctor about adjusting her meds? Surely there's something they can do to minimize this behavior even if they can't eliminate it. Can you keep a bag ready to go and count on your friend to give you a sanctuary away from home or go to a nearby hotel for the night where you can pamper yourself and regroup if this happens again? Heck, I love an excuse to stay in a hotel. A couple years ago I did it because of fleas. But I don't think the fleas were on any steroids or narcotics. :-)
Take care of yourself above all and rest assured we are here for you. Try to put this out of your mind just for one night. Hugs to you. This too shall pass.
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,456
I'm sorry that happened joygirl but I'm glad in another way that you're home and away from that situation.
I never give up on anybody Sas...I may sometimes back off to avoid nagging tho lol
D
I never give up on anybody Sas...I may sometimes back off to avoid nagging tho lol
D
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Rogersville, Tennessee
Posts: 2,659
Joy, Glad you're home safe! Definitely speak with her Dr. about how she is acting. It's most likely that the combination of meds has her all screwed up. Just try to be patient and remember it's not her right now.
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,169
Hi guys, just a vist. It's 3:30 am here and I am wide awake, a little overexcited I believe, at hubby's imminent return tonight!
Mesoso, much as I would love to have you to stay, and in Tayport I'm only 50 miles from Edinburgh from early next year, I will be relocating to Boston for a couple of years. Yes folks, looks like hubby's trip to the US did the trick and the company has pulled out all the stops to push through a visa. He has to go to oxford next week to sign the contract and discuss stuff, and should be pretty official by then! Yay! Now the hard crap begins!
Joy, nothing to add to what's been said about your mom, just keep the lines of communication open. Re the domestic situation, all you can do is give each other space and respect and let the boys know they're loved. Stick close here sweetie.
Budd good to see you, how did the bocche go?
Catch y'all later xx
Mesoso, much as I would love to have you to stay, and in Tayport I'm only 50 miles from Edinburgh from early next year, I will be relocating to Boston for a couple of years. Yes folks, looks like hubby's trip to the US did the trick and the company has pulled out all the stops to push through a visa. He has to go to oxford next week to sign the contract and discuss stuff, and should be pretty official by then! Yay! Now the hard crap begins!
Joy, nothing to add to what's been said about your mom, just keep the lines of communication open. Re the domestic situation, all you can do is give each other space and respect and let the boys know they're loved. Stick close here sweetie.
Budd good to see you, how did the bocche go?
Catch y'all later xx
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 6,224
Joy I am so glad to see you, I know you are doing hard yards at the moment so I'll keep on cyber hugging -- if you feel a big squeeze you'll know it's an upside down person.
Toots I am glad your situation has been resolved with the US. You've probably said before but what will happen with Molly?
There is thunder and lightning here, it looks like it's going to pour all weekend, how good is that.
Toots I am glad your situation has been resolved with the US. You've probably said before but what will happen with Molly?
There is thunder and lightning here, it looks like it's going to pour all weekend, how good is that.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Florida
Posts: 1,733
Oh Joy, I'm so sorry you are going through this with your mom and that things on the home front aren't so great. You are my inspiration that through all of this you are staying sober. I too wish I could make you a cup of tea and give you a real life hug. My parents are all sorts of nutty but they're often who I turn to when things are tough for me here at home - it's hard when they can't be there for you.
Unload on us as much as you need to - that's what we're here for. xoxo
Unload on us as much as you need to - that's what we're here for. xoxo
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: US East Coast
Posts: 14,287
Good morning, Marchers!
Joy, (((((((((hugs)))))))))! Steroids and narcotics, Hoo-boy! I was on steroids twice, the second time for 6 months and it was truly awful. So try not to take it personally when your mom acts out. That must be so difficult for you! You've gotten some good suggestions here and I can only add that I, too, hope you'll come here as much as you can and ask for support whenever you need it!
Toots, sooooo happy to hear your H will be home soon and that you will be coming to Boston :-)
Bud, how is Jezebel doing?
Shoes, hang in there - you are doing so well and I'm sorry the waves are choppy.
Dee, thanks - you are a rock!
Everyone, have a good Friday or whatever it is wherever you are!
Joy, (((((((((hugs)))))))))! Steroids and narcotics, Hoo-boy! I was on steroids twice, the second time for 6 months and it was truly awful. So try not to take it personally when your mom acts out. That must be so difficult for you! You've gotten some good suggestions here and I can only add that I, too, hope you'll come here as much as you can and ask for support whenever you need it!
Toots, sooooo happy to hear your H will be home soon and that you will be coming to Boston :-)
Bud, how is Jezebel doing?
Shoes, hang in there - you are doing so well and I'm sorry the waves are choppy.
Dee, thanks - you are a rock!
Everyone, have a good Friday or whatever it is wherever you are!
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 891
Hi all,
Joygirl: That's hard, really hard re your Mum/Mom. This is not medical advice but I reiterate what others have said. The med's poss have a lot to do with how she is behaving. I have been asthmatic since childhood with three trips to ICU, I very much know both from personal and professional experience how steroids can mess with your head. I've never required narcotics at the same time however but believe me, those steroids can make you feel so so angry and irritable and tearful, I remember dropping a fork once and crying because I felt so sorry for the fork and my lack of care?!!!! I guess with your Mom, her illness, drugs and digesting her future is a lot to digest. Enough, i'll PM you but thinking bout you sweetie. You have been such a support to me and many others so often. Sparkling little Joy.
Toots: great news. You're heading in one direction, i'm potentially heading in the other! I'm very ready to move home, i'm in need of some family and historic friend love. I as yet still don't own a place here in Oz, prices are extortionate and I need to sort out Mums pad at home. Logistically it'll prob take me a year from now to sort things out, citizenship, finance, etc but I do need to head home in Jan for Court, so I may pass you mid air!
MeSo, Duff, Chuff, it's so so fab to have you all back and to know there are other Marchers like me still struggling but fighting back.
Natty: where are you? Hope all okay.
Sass, WeHave, Marcher, Ken and of course Dee, I hope this finds you all well.
I don't think i've missed anyone but no doubt I have, no offence meant.
Have a nice weekend everyone. My plans are a 10.30 Womens meeting, Coffee by the bay in the pm Sat and Tap Sun......i've also signed up for a 10k run on Dec 1st, eek. Need to get training.
Later. LP x
Joygirl: That's hard, really hard re your Mum/Mom. This is not medical advice but I reiterate what others have said. The med's poss have a lot to do with how she is behaving. I have been asthmatic since childhood with three trips to ICU, I very much know both from personal and professional experience how steroids can mess with your head. I've never required narcotics at the same time however but believe me, those steroids can make you feel so so angry and irritable and tearful, I remember dropping a fork once and crying because I felt so sorry for the fork and my lack of care?!!!! I guess with your Mom, her illness, drugs and digesting her future is a lot to digest. Enough, i'll PM you but thinking bout you sweetie. You have been such a support to me and many others so often. Sparkling little Joy.
Toots: great news. You're heading in one direction, i'm potentially heading in the other! I'm very ready to move home, i'm in need of some family and historic friend love. I as yet still don't own a place here in Oz, prices are extortionate and I need to sort out Mums pad at home. Logistically it'll prob take me a year from now to sort things out, citizenship, finance, etc but I do need to head home in Jan for Court, so I may pass you mid air!
MeSo, Duff, Chuff, it's so so fab to have you all back and to know there are other Marchers like me still struggling but fighting back.
Natty: where are you? Hope all okay.
Sass, WeHave, Marcher, Ken and of course Dee, I hope this finds you all well.
I don't think i've missed anyone but no doubt I have, no offence meant.
Have a nice weekend everyone. My plans are a 10.30 Womens meeting, Coffee by the bay in the pm Sat and Tap Sun......i've also signed up for a 10k run on Dec 1st, eek. Need to get training.
Later. LP x
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,997
Hang in there Joy. You did what you could. What more can you do? And yes, sometimes a disease and or meds turn someone you know into someone you don't. You got a lot going on. Most of which is hard. Do not, under any circumstances, take it all on and put it all on your shoulders. Even if you have no one to help you with your Mom, you can only do so much.
I was thinking the same thing Marcher. We sure all have a lot going on here. Sick parents, friends with illnesses, surgeries, jobs, no jobs, retirement, good relationships, not so good relationships, bad moods, some things going just fine...anyone see a pattern here?? I'm not sure but I think they call it life. I'm not an expert. I avoided most of this. Well, didn't avoid...I just chose to numb myself to it and let someone else deal with it.
That didn't workout so well. So I guess we just get to feel and live it like everybody else now. Darn it.
I hope everybody hangs on. We have all been through a lot together.
Group ((((hug))))
xoxo
I was thinking the same thing Marcher. We sure all have a lot going on here. Sick parents, friends with illnesses, surgeries, jobs, no jobs, retirement, good relationships, not so good relationships, bad moods, some things going just fine...anyone see a pattern here?? I'm not sure but I think they call it life. I'm not an expert. I avoided most of this. Well, didn't avoid...I just chose to numb myself to it and let someone else deal with it.
That didn't workout so well. So I guess we just get to feel and live it like everybody else now. Darn it.
I hope everybody hangs on. We have all been through a lot together.
Group ((((hug))))
xoxo
sober date 4th march 2013
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: kent england
Posts: 971
Afternoon Marchers
Toots Boston! Well I think you will find that a culture change from the highlands.....dont order gravy at a restaurant! Its not!!
Shoes so hard to do what you have done girl, stay strong hun, I know that you will, you have been ever present on this site since I first joined and your strength has always been an inspiration to me, take care sweetie.
Joy I feel your pain, but its not your mum hun, I work with the elderly and although medical advances have been brilliant the consequences are that peoples bodies are living longer...but the brain goes, stay strong hun.
My life is getting better and better, home life is improving in leaps and bounds, so easy this thing!!.....just dont drink.
Take care everyone, love to you all
Mick x
Toots
Boston! Well I think you will find that a culture change from the highlands.....dont order gravy at a restaurant! Its not!!Shoes
so hard to do what you have done girl, stay strong hun, I know that you will, you have been ever present on this site since I first joined and your strength has always been an inspiration to me, take care sweetie.Joy
I feel your pain, but its not your mum hun, I work with the elderly and although medical advances have been brilliant the consequences are that peoples bodies are living longer...but the brain goes, stay strong hun.My life is getting better and better, home life is improving in leaps and bounds, so easy this thing!!.....just dont drink.
Take care everyone, love to you all
Mick x
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 4,672
Boy Shoes you said it all. We have all been through a lot and we all know what it feels like to be at the bottom. I just want to tell each and everyone of you how proud I'm to be a Marcher. You pulled me up when I was down and I know for a fact I would not be here if you had not told me to get back on the wagon. I have lost both my parents 5 months apart and they were there for me when i went through treatment the first time. and I can still hear my mom saying I hope you never drink again. and thanks to you guys i have picked my self up again. and i just know she is smiling right now. anyway----I hope everyone has a safe and sober week-end. and hugs to all of you.
So happy to be here.
Babs
So happy to be here.
Babs
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: ohio
Posts: 3,615
(((((((((((((((((shoes))))))))))))))))))))
(((((((((((((((((joygirl))))))))))))))))))))
shoes, you nailed it girl! all that does look like life. I had this total distortion when I was a teenager. maybe it's what helped me get through things. but it looked like this: since I had found my mom unexpectedly dead in our house and it turned out to be a drug overdose, and life went a bit downhill after that with my dad kind of (understandably) flipping out a bit and a whole host of other predictable (now) consequences, I thought for sure I had already dealt with a host of life issues by 13. so of course, either a) I had filled that box of tragedy and so life would be peachy or b) things would be easier to deal with since i'd dealt with more at 13 than some do in a whole lifetime.
both were wrong, very wrong. and dumb, naïve, you name it. so now, what's that word? acceptance! go figure. of course what everyone is dealing with is important, but what seems more important than happy circumstance is the people around you/us who support you in the bad and giggle with you in the good.
thank you all for being such a wonderful support! you guys are so cool.
have a happy sober day. sober quintuplets, keep on chugging! we support you and soon enough you will be logging months and not days again. you rock!
better quit while i'm already too wordy. hugs, wehav
(((((((((((((((((joygirl))))))))))))))))))))
shoes, you nailed it girl! all that does look like life. I had this total distortion when I was a teenager. maybe it's what helped me get through things. but it looked like this: since I had found my mom unexpectedly dead in our house and it turned out to be a drug overdose, and life went a bit downhill after that with my dad kind of (understandably) flipping out a bit and a whole host of other predictable (now) consequences, I thought for sure I had already dealt with a host of life issues by 13. so of course, either a) I had filled that box of tragedy and so life would be peachy or b) things would be easier to deal with since i'd dealt with more at 13 than some do in a whole lifetime.
both were wrong, very wrong. and dumb, naïve, you name it. so now, what's that word? acceptance! go figure. of course what everyone is dealing with is important, but what seems more important than happy circumstance is the people around you/us who support you in the bad and giggle with you in the good.
thank you all for being such a wonderful support! you guys are so cool.
have a happy sober day. sober quintuplets, keep on chugging! we support you and soon enough you will be logging months and not days again. you rock!
better quit while i'm already too wordy. hugs, wehav
Marcher
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Florida
Posts: 3,235
Well, the day today has begun and I'm just hanging out in it. I do feel better, having spilled my lot here! Thanks, all of you, for being here and being supportive. It's nice to be able to rely on something, someone. Believe me, I don't have much of that at home, but I can get it here, so that is my gratitude for the day. Sincere gratitude for you guys here.
Toots, Exciting news about coming to US! Any luck in pinning down a place to live?
Shoes, We should meet in the middle, put on some outlandish outfits and shoes, and go out on the town! what's in the middle? Ooohh- Vegas??? Ok, I'm sorta serious. I've never been. And whatever happens, stays there, so I hear... Sober the whole time of course. I just want to go dancing! And whatnot! And I'm going to be alone for Thanksgiving, as it will be celebrated at MIL house. Nonetheless, I have to DO something for a boost, and soon! Joy really needs a self esteem boost.
Thanks for the tea, I love baths, and I got to sleep in my own bed last night. All good things. Add to the gratitude list. Now, I have to get back to my running routine. I know that helps. It's always beginning it that's the hardest.
Have a good frisatday? everyone. You are all fantastic!
Toots, Exciting news about coming to US! Any luck in pinning down a place to live?
Shoes, We should meet in the middle, put on some outlandish outfits and shoes, and go out on the town! what's in the middle? Ooohh- Vegas??? Ok, I'm sorta serious. I've never been. And whatever happens, stays there, so I hear... Sober the whole time of course. I just want to go dancing! And whatnot! And I'm going to be alone for Thanksgiving, as it will be celebrated at MIL house. Nonetheless, I have to DO something for a boost, and soon! Joy really needs a self esteem boost.
Thanks for the tea, I love baths, and I got to sleep in my own bed last night. All good things. Add to the gratitude list. Now, I have to get back to my running routine. I know that helps. It's always beginning it that's the hardest.
Have a good frisatday? everyone. You are all fantastic!
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