Class of October 2013
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: North East, US
Posts: 2,310
Wanted to welcome abourd to the class of October 2013
from an April 2013 person. Congrats all on doing something for yourself that is truly the greatest gift you can give to yourself.
Read read read post post post. SR is an invaluable tool to have in any time if your sobriety!
The best to you all
from an April 2013 person. Congrats all on doing something for yourself that is truly the greatest gift you can give to yourself. Read read read post post post. SR is an invaluable tool to have in any time if your sobriety!
The best to you all
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: South East US
Posts: 426
My Story
Hi Class of October. I'm in for this group!
I actually posted the following yesterday in the Class of September because I was following them for so long but too apprehensive to actually pull the trigger and join them. I guess I was scared to let go of my demon. Anyway, I started my Day 1 yesterday. But October is my target my month now so I'm gonna split some time between this and the September group.
The following is what I submitted yesterday:
I started writing this “letter” several weeks ago when I stumbled on to this recovery forum. I had intended to join your group at that time, but my demon convinced me that I could wait until October and join then. He won. He always does.
Anyway, below is what I wrote 2 weeks ago. If you are interested, read on. I’ll let you know the point when you get to today’s musings.
Hi Everyone.
I am 12 beers in right now.
My wife is 6 months pregnant…with twins.
I need to change my life.
I have been following you all for about the past 2 weeks, but have not been ready to join.
But now I am.
I am humbled by your stories and struggles; you all have a lot of courage to share these thoughts. I have little. You all are very strong.
I’m gonna call myself Driver. An old nickname that has nothing to do with drinking and driving! Just a nickname. I rarely drink and drive (but it does happen occasionally).
I read your stories and threads and feel encouraged. Some are sad; some are uplifting; but all are an outpouring of your very personal truths as you experience them. I find you all amazingly brave.
We all have a past before we start new journeys. For some reason, I feel it is important to tell my story from the beginning. So here goes:
I am 46 years old. I have been drinking heavily for about 20 years (smoking cigarettes for about 23 years). Heavily defined: usually about a 12 pack of beer each night – Bud Light…my nemesis. I rarely drink hard liquor or wine… but does it matter? It’s alcohol. Also, I don’t care do delve in to whether I’m an alcoholic or an abuser. I’ve done this before and it’s a fruitless endeavor. I don’t care about definitions. It doesn’t matter. The problem is drinking.
Beer is my choice. Since age 12 I’ve had an incredible thirst for it. My Great Grand Father (wonderful man) loved to drink beer. For him, drinking somewhat quelled over the years but he still had about 3 beers a day into his nineties (yes, nineties can you believe it?). Soooo…. I would come home from Middle School in mid 1980’s, and my dear GGF would ask me to pour him his afternoon beers….and would always allow to me to have half of one of them.
I was hooked; I loved the taste!!!!
Loved the taste!!!!!!
Alas, the birth of my demon (but I had no clue at the time).
Regardless of appetite for beer, I focused on school and graduated high school with honors. But my demon was lurking. I certainly remember many passed out drunken nights in high school.
I went to university from ages 18 to 22. My demon was lurking in the corners: I did a lot of binge drinking, but made no real note of it as my drinking patterns were not any different from those of my peers.
I finished with a degree in Business. My parents and siblings were proud of me. Still are. But they didn’t know the true extent of my drinking. They probably still don’t. If they do know about my true habits, they don’t say anything about it.
By the way, none of my immediate family members are anything more than social drinkers. I get along very well with all of my family. I come from a very loving family with no “issues” in my familial background.
Fast forward a few years. Despite a degree in business, a desire to work with children prompted me to return to school to get a degree in education. After getting my first teaching position, the real drinking began. My demon was no longer lurking. He was active. But I still had no clue.
With work came pay. I now had money and could buy all the beer I desired. It was such a wonderful release to kick back at the end of the day and let the beer course through my veins and help wash away thoughts of life’s everyday struggles.
I think it’s important to comment a bit further here. “Life’s every day struggles” – define?: my struggles were (and are) no different than anyone else’s. I just perceive them differently. I worry. A lot...about everything. I know I’m just wired this way…since I was a kid. (Clinically, I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder about 11 years ago).
I remember my mother telling me as a young child that I was her “little worry wart”. My leg(s) were and are always in constant motion swaying back and forth (I think a physical manifestation of my anxiety).
There are some upsides to anxiety and worry. I am constantly planning (and executing). At the risk of coming off as a braggard, I get a ton of stuff done on a daily basis (more on this later). But, obviously there is a downside to all the worry: a constant feeling of uneasiness and tension. Anxiety is probably my demon’s best friend. It is a great leverage point. Is there any better way to reduce anxiety than by self medicating with alcohol? Nature’s answer to worry.
The following is the conclusion of my “letter”; written today 9/30/13:
Anyway, I taught school for a number of years. I went to work every day and excelled at my job. But I drank every night. And I loved it. I didn’t realize at the time (and for a number of years later) that I had any kind of problem. The old adage: “Drinking Problem, I don’t have a drinking problem. I drink, I get drunk…no problem.”
Around this time I married my girlfriend whom I had dated for about 5 years. She enjoyed drinking too (not nearly to my extent). Our friends enjoyed drinking as well. All seemed normal at the time. If she had any concerns, they were not voiced.
Several years later I went back to school to get an advanced degree in psychology. My demon sat on my shoulder the whole time I was back at University. I did my school work well and met all expectations (actually even finished the coursework a year early). But I was still drinking all the time.
I remember going to the public library one Saturday morning to do some work on my dissertation (about 13 years ago). A man who appeared to be homeless walked up to me while I was looking for a book and said, “how you be doin’ that with all the wine you be drinking?”
Those were his exact words. I just looked at him. I had no answer. That was the entirety of our exchange.
But his question lingered with me. How could this man possibly know anything about my drinking? I don’t drink wine, but still this complete stranger could see what no one else could see. Even what I couldn’t see. I was drinking too much. I was a drunk. Maybe this one man could actually see the demon that sits on my shoulder and whispers to me that “it is time to have a beer”.
I know that is a little fantastical. But I still wonder about this supernatural man who saw right through me.
At the time, I know I interpreted this question as a sort of compliment. Indeed, I wrote a dissertation and graduated with a doctoral degree while drinking copious amounts of beer…how do I be doin’ that with all the wine I be drinking? I’m super human, right?! (or so I thought, and for a long time in to the future).
But today the memory of that moment evokes such a keen sense of regret: A missed opportunity to honestly self-reflect on my behavior. I was in too deep I guess.
Fast forward a few years. I obtained a job as school psychologist in a great school district. I worked (and continue to work) very hard. I enjoy helping children. But my drinking continues. It makes me feel like a fraud.
I hope this doesn’t sound boastful, but I know I’m good at my job. People often praise my work performance. I interpret this to mean that these people believe that I have strong character. But I think character is defined by what one does when others aren’t looking. What do I do when others are not looking? To name a few: Drink. Fail to meet potential. Let down my wife. So, from my perspective, I lack character. I am a drunk. A fraud.
About 10 years ago my wife and I bought a house. Oh how wonderful! Now I could come home to my very own place to drink. Life was grand. I would come home every night and drink a 12 pack of beer. I would sit on the back porch and drink bottle after bottle. The bottles would be strewn about the porch. Several days’ worth would accumulate and then I might clean them up. My wife didn’t say too much, but she saw my demon first hand.
This went on for a few years. I gained some weight. My wife voiced concerns occasionally. So I had some adjusting to do, right? How could I make this right?
My demon and I came up with some answers. First, we switched from bottles to cans (less weight, easier to clean up, no rattling). Then I put a trellis into the ground to use as a façade in front of my recycling bin (the empties became less obvious with the façade I put up). Funny to use that word, façade: a way of behaving or appearing that gives other people a false idea of your true feelings or situation. Me too a tee!
Then I began working around my home every day after school. I mentioned earlier that “I get a ton of stuff done on a daily basis”. I love working with my hands and the associated feelings of getting things accomplished. It also allows me to cross tasks off my list (been making lists since I was a kid - but big problem here: LIST=ANXIETY, must get things off list, so LIST=ANXIETY=BEER).
At any rate, my thinking was that if I were doing productive things, then there would be no complaints about drinking, right? I could always say “look what I’ve accomplished…I can’t be a drunk”. Boy, my demon and I can solve any problem.
I then upped the ante by beginning to jog/run again. I ran three marathons, a bunch of halfs, and countless other races (all while drinking and smoking full time). I was superhuman again.
Surely if I were in good shape and getting things done around the house there would be absolutely no reason for concern. I can’t have a problem. I’m not a drunk. At least that’s what my demon and I told (tell) each other. And what I could tell my wife when she voiced concern.
REALLY? I know now that is just me and my demon creating justification for my behavior.
But the fact remained (and remains) that there is concern. I am lying to myself and my wife. I have a problem that I cannot control. This beer is destroying me…spiritually, mentally, and physically.
I hate myself when I’m drinking (so I pretty much hate myself every day). Occasionally there are arguments with my wife that I don’t fully remember. I hate myself in the morning (every morning) because I drank the night before. I feel like crap every morning. I’m starting to get fine motor tremors on some days. The thoracic area of my back always has pain. I wonder if it’s liver pain. But I don’t want to go to the doctor for fear of bad news. Twenty years of a twelve pack a day has got to do something to the liver (for now I’m just going to put thoughts about my liver aside; no need to induce unnecessary anxiety).
I know my wife is disappointed in me every day. I know she loves me dearly,
but I also know we are both aware that I am not the man I can be. It pains me to know that she is not getting the full me because, in effect, I’m not present. I’m absent. I’m drunk. I am breaking her heart daily.
I don’t know why/how she hangs in there with me.
I tell myself every morning that “I will not drink today”. I will show my wife that I love her by being there with her. I will show my wife that I love her by choosing her over beer. And in turn, I will love myself.
But almost every day (around noon) the crappiness wears off and I’m thinking about cold ones. And almost every day I’m at the store after work buying beer. So much for loving my wife.
So why am I writing this now? I need sobriety. My wife is pregnant. My circumstances are different. I desperately need to be present to be a good husband and father. I can’t do that drunk.
Today I went to work feeling like crap (again). I attended a work meeting for several hours and then decided to take the rest of the day off to finish this “letter”. I figured I would pour myself into finishing this “letter” and preparing myself to join the class of October (if there is one?) rather than pouring some beer down my throat. And I guess I will post this “letter” on that thread as an introduction.
I know this is the last day for you all in the class of September (congratulations to all of you on your efforts…I truly wish you all well). I suppose I wanted to share all this with you, because, while not part of your group, it was you all (with your inspiring stories) who at least partially gave me the courage to recognize and state out loud to the world that I have a problem that needs to be addressed.
I know I’m going to need plenty of help. The kind of help that you all so kindly provide to each other.
So, here’s to starting one day early. My Day One.
To be honest, I am not too terribly concerned about drinking today or tomorrow or even the rest of the workweek. I occasionally go three or four days without drinking (extremely rare), but I know my biggest first challenge (and fear) will be Friday. The weekend will be on and my demon will be whispering to me LOUDLY. Weekends are always great for working around the house and drinking beer.
A bit more honesty: I am so fearful. The thought of never drinking again seems like such impossibility. I managed to put down the cigarettes with the help of an E-Cigarette 43 days ago. But I simply cannot imagine life without beer. I cannot fathom a lifetime of never drinking again. I don’t know how this can be done.
I am so scared. But I am also so scared of the possibility that, when I die, I would be remembered by my wife and future children as a drunk above all other qualities I may possess or demonstrate.
I’ll just take it one day at a time for now.
Thank you for reading my story. I'm gald to be a part of this group>
I actually posted the following yesterday in the Class of September because I was following them for so long but too apprehensive to actually pull the trigger and join them. I guess I was scared to let go of my demon. Anyway, I started my Day 1 yesterday. But October is my target my month now so I'm gonna split some time between this and the September group.
The following is what I submitted yesterday:
I started writing this “letter” several weeks ago when I stumbled on to this recovery forum. I had intended to join your group at that time, but my demon convinced me that I could wait until October and join then. He won. He always does.
Anyway, below is what I wrote 2 weeks ago. If you are interested, read on. I’ll let you know the point when you get to today’s musings.
Hi Everyone.
I am 12 beers in right now.
My wife is 6 months pregnant…with twins.
I need to change my life.
I have been following you all for about the past 2 weeks, but have not been ready to join.
But now I am.
I am humbled by your stories and struggles; you all have a lot of courage to share these thoughts. I have little. You all are very strong.
I’m gonna call myself Driver. An old nickname that has nothing to do with drinking and driving! Just a nickname. I rarely drink and drive (but it does happen occasionally).
I read your stories and threads and feel encouraged. Some are sad; some are uplifting; but all are an outpouring of your very personal truths as you experience them. I find you all amazingly brave.
We all have a past before we start new journeys. For some reason, I feel it is important to tell my story from the beginning. So here goes:
I am 46 years old. I have been drinking heavily for about 20 years (smoking cigarettes for about 23 years). Heavily defined: usually about a 12 pack of beer each night – Bud Light…my nemesis. I rarely drink hard liquor or wine… but does it matter? It’s alcohol. Also, I don’t care do delve in to whether I’m an alcoholic or an abuser. I’ve done this before and it’s a fruitless endeavor. I don’t care about definitions. It doesn’t matter. The problem is drinking.
Beer is my choice. Since age 12 I’ve had an incredible thirst for it. My Great Grand Father (wonderful man) loved to drink beer. For him, drinking somewhat quelled over the years but he still had about 3 beers a day into his nineties (yes, nineties can you believe it?). Soooo…. I would come home from Middle School in mid 1980’s, and my dear GGF would ask me to pour him his afternoon beers….and would always allow to me to have half of one of them.
I was hooked; I loved the taste!!!!
Loved the taste!!!!!!
Alas, the birth of my demon (but I had no clue at the time).
Regardless of appetite for beer, I focused on school and graduated high school with honors. But my demon was lurking. I certainly remember many passed out drunken nights in high school.
I went to university from ages 18 to 22. My demon was lurking in the corners: I did a lot of binge drinking, but made no real note of it as my drinking patterns were not any different from those of my peers.
I finished with a degree in Business. My parents and siblings were proud of me. Still are. But they didn’t know the true extent of my drinking. They probably still don’t. If they do know about my true habits, they don’t say anything about it.
By the way, none of my immediate family members are anything more than social drinkers. I get along very well with all of my family. I come from a very loving family with no “issues” in my familial background.
Fast forward a few years. Despite a degree in business, a desire to work with children prompted me to return to school to get a degree in education. After getting my first teaching position, the real drinking began. My demon was no longer lurking. He was active. But I still had no clue.
With work came pay. I now had money and could buy all the beer I desired. It was such a wonderful release to kick back at the end of the day and let the beer course through my veins and help wash away thoughts of life’s everyday struggles.
I think it’s important to comment a bit further here. “Life’s every day struggles” – define?: my struggles were (and are) no different than anyone else’s. I just perceive them differently. I worry. A lot...about everything. I know I’m just wired this way…since I was a kid. (Clinically, I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder about 11 years ago).
I remember my mother telling me as a young child that I was her “little worry wart”. My leg(s) were and are always in constant motion swaying back and forth (I think a physical manifestation of my anxiety).
There are some upsides to anxiety and worry. I am constantly planning (and executing). At the risk of coming off as a braggard, I get a ton of stuff done on a daily basis (more on this later). But, obviously there is a downside to all the worry: a constant feeling of uneasiness and tension. Anxiety is probably my demon’s best friend. It is a great leverage point. Is there any better way to reduce anxiety than by self medicating with alcohol? Nature’s answer to worry.
The following is the conclusion of my “letter”; written today 9/30/13:
Anyway, I taught school for a number of years. I went to work every day and excelled at my job. But I drank every night. And I loved it. I didn’t realize at the time (and for a number of years later) that I had any kind of problem. The old adage: “Drinking Problem, I don’t have a drinking problem. I drink, I get drunk…no problem.”
Around this time I married my girlfriend whom I had dated for about 5 years. She enjoyed drinking too (not nearly to my extent). Our friends enjoyed drinking as well. All seemed normal at the time. If she had any concerns, they were not voiced.
Several years later I went back to school to get an advanced degree in psychology. My demon sat on my shoulder the whole time I was back at University. I did my school work well and met all expectations (actually even finished the coursework a year early). But I was still drinking all the time.
I remember going to the public library one Saturday morning to do some work on my dissertation (about 13 years ago). A man who appeared to be homeless walked up to me while I was looking for a book and said, “how you be doin’ that with all the wine you be drinking?”
Those were his exact words. I just looked at him. I had no answer. That was the entirety of our exchange.
But his question lingered with me. How could this man possibly know anything about my drinking? I don’t drink wine, but still this complete stranger could see what no one else could see. Even what I couldn’t see. I was drinking too much. I was a drunk. Maybe this one man could actually see the demon that sits on my shoulder and whispers to me that “it is time to have a beer”.
I know that is a little fantastical. But I still wonder about this supernatural man who saw right through me.
At the time, I know I interpreted this question as a sort of compliment. Indeed, I wrote a dissertation and graduated with a doctoral degree while drinking copious amounts of beer…how do I be doin’ that with all the wine I be drinking? I’m super human, right?! (or so I thought, and for a long time in to the future).
But today the memory of that moment evokes such a keen sense of regret: A missed opportunity to honestly self-reflect on my behavior. I was in too deep I guess.
Fast forward a few years. I obtained a job as school psychologist in a great school district. I worked (and continue to work) very hard. I enjoy helping children. But my drinking continues. It makes me feel like a fraud.
I hope this doesn’t sound boastful, but I know I’m good at my job. People often praise my work performance. I interpret this to mean that these people believe that I have strong character. But I think character is defined by what one does when others aren’t looking. What do I do when others are not looking? To name a few: Drink. Fail to meet potential. Let down my wife. So, from my perspective, I lack character. I am a drunk. A fraud.
About 10 years ago my wife and I bought a house. Oh how wonderful! Now I could come home to my very own place to drink. Life was grand. I would come home every night and drink a 12 pack of beer. I would sit on the back porch and drink bottle after bottle. The bottles would be strewn about the porch. Several days’ worth would accumulate and then I might clean them up. My wife didn’t say too much, but she saw my demon first hand.
This went on for a few years. I gained some weight. My wife voiced concerns occasionally. So I had some adjusting to do, right? How could I make this right?
My demon and I came up with some answers. First, we switched from bottles to cans (less weight, easier to clean up, no rattling). Then I put a trellis into the ground to use as a façade in front of my recycling bin (the empties became less obvious with the façade I put up). Funny to use that word, façade: a way of behaving or appearing that gives other people a false idea of your true feelings or situation. Me too a tee!
Then I began working around my home every day after school. I mentioned earlier that “I get a ton of stuff done on a daily basis”. I love working with my hands and the associated feelings of getting things accomplished. It also allows me to cross tasks off my list (been making lists since I was a kid - but big problem here: LIST=ANXIETY, must get things off list, so LIST=ANXIETY=BEER).
At any rate, my thinking was that if I were doing productive things, then there would be no complaints about drinking, right? I could always say “look what I’ve accomplished…I can’t be a drunk”. Boy, my demon and I can solve any problem.
I then upped the ante by beginning to jog/run again. I ran three marathons, a bunch of halfs, and countless other races (all while drinking and smoking full time). I was superhuman again.
Surely if I were in good shape and getting things done around the house there would be absolutely no reason for concern. I can’t have a problem. I’m not a drunk. At least that’s what my demon and I told (tell) each other. And what I could tell my wife when she voiced concern.
REALLY? I know now that is just me and my demon creating justification for my behavior.
But the fact remained (and remains) that there is concern. I am lying to myself and my wife. I have a problem that I cannot control. This beer is destroying me…spiritually, mentally, and physically.
I hate myself when I’m drinking (so I pretty much hate myself every day). Occasionally there are arguments with my wife that I don’t fully remember. I hate myself in the morning (every morning) because I drank the night before. I feel like crap every morning. I’m starting to get fine motor tremors on some days. The thoracic area of my back always has pain. I wonder if it’s liver pain. But I don’t want to go to the doctor for fear of bad news. Twenty years of a twelve pack a day has got to do something to the liver (for now I’m just going to put thoughts about my liver aside; no need to induce unnecessary anxiety).
I know my wife is disappointed in me every day. I know she loves me dearly,
but I also know we are both aware that I am not the man I can be. It pains me to know that she is not getting the full me because, in effect, I’m not present. I’m absent. I’m drunk. I am breaking her heart daily.
I don’t know why/how she hangs in there with me.
I tell myself every morning that “I will not drink today”. I will show my wife that I love her by being there with her. I will show my wife that I love her by choosing her over beer. And in turn, I will love myself.
But almost every day (around noon) the crappiness wears off and I’m thinking about cold ones. And almost every day I’m at the store after work buying beer. So much for loving my wife.
So why am I writing this now? I need sobriety. My wife is pregnant. My circumstances are different. I desperately need to be present to be a good husband and father. I can’t do that drunk.
Today I went to work feeling like crap (again). I attended a work meeting for several hours and then decided to take the rest of the day off to finish this “letter”. I figured I would pour myself into finishing this “letter” and preparing myself to join the class of October (if there is one?) rather than pouring some beer down my throat. And I guess I will post this “letter” on that thread as an introduction.
I know this is the last day for you all in the class of September (congratulations to all of you on your efforts…I truly wish you all well). I suppose I wanted to share all this with you, because, while not part of your group, it was you all (with your inspiring stories) who at least partially gave me the courage to recognize and state out loud to the world that I have a problem that needs to be addressed.
I know I’m going to need plenty of help. The kind of help that you all so kindly provide to each other.
So, here’s to starting one day early. My Day One.
To be honest, I am not too terribly concerned about drinking today or tomorrow or even the rest of the workweek. I occasionally go three or four days without drinking (extremely rare), but I know my biggest first challenge (and fear) will be Friday. The weekend will be on and my demon will be whispering to me LOUDLY. Weekends are always great for working around the house and drinking beer.
A bit more honesty: I am so fearful. The thought of never drinking again seems like such impossibility. I managed to put down the cigarettes with the help of an E-Cigarette 43 days ago. But I simply cannot imagine life without beer. I cannot fathom a lifetime of never drinking again. I don’t know how this can be done.
I am so scared. But I am also so scared of the possibility that, when I die, I would be remembered by my wife and future children as a drunk above all other qualities I may possess or demonstrate.
I’ll just take it one day at a time for now.
Thank you for reading my story. I'm gald to be a part of this group>
Recognizes the Beast
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: In the kitchen, cooking up a storm
Posts: 704
Welcome Driver and thanks for sharing!
Even though I'm not a member of the October thread, I really want to comment on your post.
A few things: I remember being totally helpless as well to alcohol. In fact, one night is particularly vivid, I was sitting on the sofa and told myself I would not go and get beer for the love of my family. Yet within the hour I was out the door. That's a devastating feeling of hopelessness, guilt, shame, and worthlessness all rolled in one. Most people here get it.
The other thing is how sobriety is unimaginable. All people in recovery understand that, myself included. You're obviously a very bright guy. Do some research and you'll find that there are some very good scientific reasons you feel that way, regarding how your addiction affects the dopamine levels in your brain. In any case, trust me and others here, when we say that you will be able to feel pleasure again in your life once you get sober. Your addiction is telling you otherwise right now, but it's a lie. If sober life was so boring, none of us would do it!
Anyways, all the best, I hope you get the help you need here or elsewhere and thanks again for putting so much time and effort in sharing your story!
Even though I'm not a member of the October thread, I really want to comment on your post.
A few things: I remember being totally helpless as well to alcohol. In fact, one night is particularly vivid, I was sitting on the sofa and told myself I would not go and get beer for the love of my family. Yet within the hour I was out the door. That's a devastating feeling of hopelessness, guilt, shame, and worthlessness all rolled in one. Most people here get it.
The other thing is how sobriety is unimaginable. All people in recovery understand that, myself included. You're obviously a very bright guy. Do some research and you'll find that there are some very good scientific reasons you feel that way, regarding how your addiction affects the dopamine levels in your brain. In any case, trust me and others here, when we say that you will be able to feel pleasure again in your life once you get sober. Your addiction is telling you otherwise right now, but it's a lie. If sober life was so boring, none of us would do it!
Anyways, all the best, I hope you get the help you need here or elsewhere and thanks again for putting so much time and effort in sharing your story!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 240
I hope no one cares if I'm on this thread 24/7 :-) I find that I do my best on days when I am.
I want to kickstart this group by sharing some seminars I've been listening to on recovery.
Recovery2.0 | BEYOND ADDICTION ONLINE CONFERENCE
It's only $0.99 for all!
I want to kickstart this group by sharing some seminars I've been listening to on recovery.
Recovery2.0 | BEYOND ADDICTION ONLINE CONFERENCE
It's only $0.99 for all!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Aliso Viejo, CA
Posts: 863
Good morning tobies. I need to join this class. I was in the Jan 2013 class and sober for over 7 months but have relapsed. Have already had a few blackouts and don't remember coming home a few times. Husband has left me again and I'm pleading with him to come back but his heart is broken and it might not happen this time. I sent him a link to this site, so hopefully he can get some help from the al anon forums. He text me that he has been reading all night.
Welcome to all the newbies. Hoping I can make it work this time. My sober time this year has been wonderful and I desperately want it back.
-S
Welcome to all the newbies. Hoping I can make it work this time. My sober time this year has been wonderful and I desperately want it back.
-S
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