Renarde

he doesn't. This is out of nowhere. He has had a lot of problems in the opposite direction - being cold, having an iron grip on emotions. I've asked him for years to deal with it. Suddenly that wall just crumbled and it's like a lifetime of dysfunction is just pouring out of him. The intensity is scaring me. I don't know what to do except to power on, try to be compassionate and honest, focus on my own recovery, and try to do the best for our kid. I threw the bottle out and ordered recovery books because I no longer care what he says/thinks and I am following my instincts about what is best for me.

Renarde

I can't do anymore work tonight. My brain is fried.

Christy, thanks for your response. I really enjoyed your account of AA. I think I may start going to a group once we move.

GotGrace

Oh, Renarde. What a terrible spot to be in. I guess all I can suggest is to remind yourself how you would feel if you woke up one morning having lost your sobriety. Wouldn't that just add more stress?
You know that drinking will not make any of this better or easier. Please try to find a way to cope with the stress without drinking, and keep us posted!
Best of luck to you.

Renarde

Thank you Grace. I agree completely....I want to be sober. I can't even imagine how badly I would deal with this if I was drinking. One thing I realized is that even though I wasn't drinking 24 hours a day, my drinking was affecting me 24 hours a day.

SoberChristy

That is a great quote, Renarde. I hope things with your husband improve, but that is great that you are seeing the situation with clarity and your sobriety as your best interest. It's the right thing to do.

AA was awesome. I'm going to try out another meeting in the next few days. People have suggested checking out different ones to see what sticks. I am thankful for the experience because now I am ending my Day One sober.

Dee74

Sending you and your family good vibes Renarde

welcome Bacon

D

Renarde

Thank you Dee. So glad you are back.

jesternudder

Renade, did your h recently begin the antidepressant? If so, maybe he's feeling off kilter as he adjusts. I had some weird side effects when I started them that evened out over a couple weeks. Anyway, I wish you and family the best!

I'm still sober here on day 5. Keeping a close eye on myself because my binging pattern usually occurred about once a week.

Was thinking about RR and the Beast today. I've always been "question authority" kind of person who hates being ordered around. I also have a vivid visual imagination. So today I decided to put a face on my beast. I experimented with envisioning various despised ex-bosses, unfair traffic cops, even political figures I disagree with "playing the role" of my Beast in my mind's eye. I finally settled on one particularly loathed "evil nemesis" from teen years who suits the role perfectly. If that man offered me a million bucks I'd refuse just on general principle- blech ! If he told me I should have a drink? Hell no! Dream on, Buster!!! Anyway, I know it might be silly but at least it's sober silly!
Peace to all who are struggling & continued strength to those hanging tough!

sunset01

Just a thought Renard, is hubby successful in his own right? I'm just mulling it over in my head and I'm wondering... if he's someone who's always prided himself of being in control....then watches his wife be successful in her life both in work pursuit's and personal ie not drinking, maybe the fact that you have wrestled back control of your life, that you are changing is part of what's troubling him? I don't know just a thought?

Either way what you said about being, compassionate and honest and looking after you, your baby....and your sobriety is what's important...well done for being so strong! xoxox

workoholic

Good morning everyone.

Renarde, I hate packing and moving and always postpone it for as long as I can. Is this indecisiveness
a new side of your husband? Perhaps he is dealing with problems he hasn't told you about?
Hope things work out, perhaps you can talk to him if he seems receptive?

Having the day off waiting for my night shift but plumbers are in my apartment since 7:30.
I took to the streets and ended up in cafe with wifi.
But sitting in a cafe doing nothing is pretty normal, what non alcoholics do alot right?
At least it looks like it will be a beautifull autumn day today so being homeless won't be
too bad.

Day 19 will be alittle different for sure, some variety is always welcome I guess.
I can always pretend that I am normal

FishnHippy

I was wondering does anybody else have stomach problems from there drinking and if so how long does it take for it to get better I know its only been 11 days but my stomach still feels Horrible. I was almost scared to come in here today all the anti husband an anti men talk lol. Everybody have a great day and have a great sober weekend

Dee74

I had stomach issues for a while - it wasn't just my drinking I had a pretty bad diet and pretty irregular meals too.

You can always see your Dr if you're concerned FnH

There's not really any anti-men stuff here is there?
I'm one of them males type units too LOL.

It's important that this be a place where everyone can share and be honest, I reckon

D

Renarde

Baby is up and so sick again. Nonstop coughing. I am going to have to miss class again tomorrow to take care of her and get her to doc. Feeling overwhelmed.

Sunset, yes he is successful but this has nothing to do with me. He has a lot of history to deal with and is having some mental illness issues. He has been supportive of my success for over a decade and is proud of me.

Black

Gee the threads are moving like wild fire.
Welcome all the new people here since I was last on.
Just signed into the 24 hour club and find it a real help, might help some of the new people.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...join-us-7.html

Have moments like everyone else and the moods getting worse.

Was reading about Co dependent last night and totally believe I am one so need to talk to my therapist about how to change it.

lorelei

Morning all,

Hope everyone's well, flying visit for now, will chk in later.
Renarde poor baby hope he soon better and you too xxxx
Fish, no one's anti anythin except anti alcohol x


Day 19
X

Dee74

are you reading Melody Beattie, Black?

D

jazzfish

Day 10 and with some strange insomnia, feel great though. My big yard project is now at an end after a very heavy day yesterday and I am very sore. Yard work is usually a drinking occasion, but I had no big cravings. I did have two brief thoughts of having a beer as a "reward" at the end, but I immediately dismissed those thoughts.

I am really happy about the mental shift that seems to has finally occurred. I am experiencing a real sense of freedom that it is finally over.

misspond

Good morning all! Well, it's morning here in the UK I hope that everyone has a great day, whatever it is that you're doing or dealing with x

Tallia

Renarde just finished reading back you doing great coping with everything that's going on well done for throwing the wine out drinking would just add to stress and problems hope the little one is better soon xx

Black hope everything goes well for you at your appointment today xx

Us anti men never :-* how would I ever cope without my Bradley Cooper fix esp now I found out he don't drink.

Fish hope your stomach is better soon overwise a trip to the doctors won't harm. Mine was horrible the first week or so but I think the junk I put into it didn't help.

Dee glad you feeling better

Hope everyone has a good sober day weekend is coming time to start putting my plan in place.

lorelei

Bradley Cooper, you speaking my language T ;-) xx