Codependency and Beyond Part 21
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
(((Kevin))) - I think it's pretty cool that your dad is recognizing how his behaviors and is accepting responsibility. At least now, if you aren't comfortable when you see him, and choose not to see him again for a while, he'll know why. I went through that with my dad, on certain behaviors and it took a while, but he's gotten much better.
(((Lisa))) - oh, you just don't know. I don't wanna smack her (the only person I've ever hit was XABF#3 while on crack and I got smacked back across the porch). I do want to tell her off, but am trying to figure a calm way to tell her that her behavior is unacceptable.
It may take a while, but the karma police will get her. Though her kids are only 4, 2, and 1, that means they'll all be teenagers at the same time
From what I've heard, her babies-daddy is kid number 4.
I did, at least, have support of my coworkers, and that helped.
I dealt with all the emotional overload by sleeping all day. Right after I woke up, dad told me there was a banana split in the kitchen for me I don't think I've had one of those since we had our first dog...we had to give him the containers so he could lick off all the leftover ice cream. As he would do that, the containers would move and he'd be all over the den. Good memory.
Will probably start the readings for this week. Elvis has been outside, enjoying the weather, and did come in to get some treats so he's acting better since I've been giving him his herbal capsule every day.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
(((Lisa))) - oh, you just don't know. I don't wanna smack her (the only person I've ever hit was XABF#3 while on crack and I got smacked back across the porch). I do want to tell her off, but am trying to figure a calm way to tell her that her behavior is unacceptable.
It may take a while, but the karma police will get her. Though her kids are only 4, 2, and 1, that means they'll all be teenagers at the same time
From what I've heard, her babies-daddy is kid number 4.I did, at least, have support of my coworkers, and that helped.
I dealt with all the emotional overload by sleeping all day. Right after I woke up, dad told me there was a banana split in the kitchen for me
I don't think I've had one of those since we had our first dog...we had to give him the containers so he could lick off all the leftover ice cream. As he would do that, the containers would move and he'd be all over the den. Good memory.Will probably start the readings for this week. Elvis has been outside, enjoying the weather, and did come in to get some treats so he's acting better since I've been giving him his herbal capsule every day.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: In a good place
Posts: 4,482
Originally Posted by Impurrfect 
I do want to tell her off, but am trying to figure a calm way to tell her that her behavior is unacceptable.
I haven't spoken with daughter in two days, have only exchanged a couple of texts. I'm really enjoying this
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
I don't think (((Rita))) has access to SR at Pink Acres but am asking for your prayers. Her dad died this afternoon, she is heading to KY in the morning.
(((Rita))) - much love and prayers heading your way.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
(((Rita))) - much love and prayers heading your way.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
mergirl
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Paradise
Posts: 4,161
Monday, September 12, 2011
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
Healing
We should learn not to grow impatient with the slow healing process of time. We should discipline ourselves to recognize that there are many steps to be taken along the highway leading from sorrow to renewed serenity... We should anticipate these stages in our emotional convalescence: unbearable pain, poignant grief, empty days, resistance to consolation, disinterestedness in life, gradually giving way . . . to the new weaving of a pattern of action and the acceptance of the irresistible challenge of life.
—Joshua Loth Liebman
Recovery is a process. It is a gradual process, a healing process, and a spiritual process - a journey rather than a destination.
Just as codependency takes on a life of its own and is progressive, so recovery progresses. One thing leads to another and things - as well as us - get better.
We can relax, do our part, and let the rest happen.
Today, I will trust this process and this journey that I have undertaken.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
Healing
We should learn not to grow impatient with the slow healing process of time. We should discipline ourselves to recognize that there are many steps to be taken along the highway leading from sorrow to renewed serenity... We should anticipate these stages in our emotional convalescence: unbearable pain, poignant grief, empty days, resistance to consolation, disinterestedness in life, gradually giving way . . . to the new weaving of a pattern of action and the acceptance of the irresistible challenge of life.
—Joshua Loth Liebman
Recovery is a process. It is a gradual process, a healing process, and a spiritual process - a journey rather than a destination.
Just as codependency takes on a life of its own and is progressive, so recovery progresses. One thing leads to another and things - as well as us - get better.
We can relax, do our part, and let the rest happen.
Today, I will trust this process and this journey that I have undertaken.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 1,691
Amy thanks for the heads up. Poor Rita
Well i have been considering why i am isolating. I dont think i am agrophobic as such [least i hope not] but i think i have a specific social phobia that just happens to be that i am phobic about the town where i live. Cr@p Hey and dont say move - life aint that simples
Well i have been considering why i am isolating. I dont think i am agrophobic as such [least i hope not] but i think i have a specific social phobia that just happens to be that i am phobic about the town where i live. Cr@p Hey and dont say move - life aint that simples
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
(((Rita))) is grateful for the prayers and support from her "codie friends". Don't know if/when she'll have access to a computer, but the funeral will probably be on Fri., so it's going to be a tough week for her. I know when Gary died, it was SR prayers that kept me going.
I'm about to start back on school work. Doing research on stuff that's a bit over my head..Executive information systems, what makes a good Chief Information Operations (I think that's what CIO stand for) effective, but plugging along. While researching the different programs, found an app called "Anvil" so had to tell Tess "there's an app for you!". Funny thing is, one paragraph of what the app does actually sounds like what she does at her job.
We're back in the 80's, gorgeous day.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
I'm about to start back on school work. Doing research on stuff that's a bit over my head..Executive information systems, what makes a good Chief Information Operations (I think that's what CIO stand for) effective, but plugging along. While researching the different programs, found an app called "Anvil" so had to tell Tess "there's an app for you!". Funny thing is, one paragraph of what the app does actually sounds like what she does at her job.
We're back in the 80's, gorgeous day.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 1,691
Amy i feel right proud of you and your plugging away at your schoolwork.
Regarding prayer i do pray a little but im not altogether strong that im not just another cracker self deluded so Id like to do my bit to offer comfort and support but prayer. IDK although i have always found your "hugs and prayers" sweet and fuzzy Amy
Regarding prayer i do pray a little but im not altogether strong that im not just another cracker self deluded so Id like to do my bit to offer comfort and support but prayer. IDK although i have always found your "hugs and prayers" sweet and fuzzy Amy
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
Thanks ((Kevin)) - I get it At one time, I thought of abbreviating my "hugs and prayers" and realized it would come out as "H&P"...rather ironic how that works out.
I've printed out several "scholarly" articles to read and figure out how to do a power point presentation. SOOOO much information. I think I'll take a break and go get my car emission tested...something I have to have done so I can get my car tags by my birthday next week.
We've used the same guy for years..right down the road, has a fridge full of soft drinks for his customers, and just a really nice guy (and cheap). We need to get stepmom's car done, too (the tags are by dad's b'day, which is the day before mine). I'm going to let them do that. No reason stepmom can't do it, but NMP.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
At one time, I thought of abbreviating my "hugs and prayers" and realized it would come out as "H&P"...rather ironic how that works out.I've printed out several "scholarly" articles to read and figure out how to do a power point presentation. SOOOO much information. I think I'll take a break and go get my car emission tested...something I have to have done so I can get my car tags by my birthday next week.
We've used the same guy for years..right down the road, has a fridge full of soft drinks for his customers, and just a really nice guy (and cheap). We need to get stepmom's car done, too (the tags are by dad's b'day, which is the day before mine). I'm going to let them do that. No reason stepmom can't do it, but NMP.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 1,691
Just want to say that if i dissappear for a few days my goal is to pop in at least once every 3 days though knowing how i am it could be upto 10 times a day.
I still want to stay a part of this community but like i say i may take a couple of days off and that but fret ye not as i say im commited to being here AT LEAST 1 day in 3.
Right on! Keep on keeping on!
I still want to stay a part of this community but like i say i may take a couple of days off and that but fret ye not as i say im commited to being here AT LEAST 1 day in 3.
Right on! Keep on keeping on!
mergirl
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Paradise
Posts: 4,161
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
Times of Reprogramming
Recovery is not all-tiresome, unrewarded work. There are times of joy and rest, times when we comfortably practice what we have learned. There are times of change, times when we struggle to learn something new or overcome a particular problem.
These are the times when what we've been practicing in recovery begins to show in our life. These times of change are intense, but purposeful.
There are also times when, at a deep level, we are being "reprogrammed." We start letting go of beliefs and behaviors. We may feel frightened or confused during these times. Our old behaviors or patterns may not have worked for us, but they were comfortable and familiar.
During these times we may feel vulnerable, lonely, and needy - like we are on a journey without a road map or a flashlight, and we feel as if no one has traveled this ground before.
We may not understand what is being worked out in us. We may not know where or if we are being led.
We are being led. We are not alone. Our Higher Power is working His finest and best to bring true change in us. Others have traveled this road to. We will be led to someone who can help us, someone who can provide the markers we need.
We are being prepared for receiving as much joy and love as our heart can hold.
Recovery is a healing process. We can trust it, even when we don't understand it. We are right where we need to be in this process; we're going through exactly what we need to experience. And where we're going is better than any place we've been.
Today, God, help me believe that the changes I'm going through are for the good. Help me believe that the road I'm traveling will lead to a place of light, love, and joy
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
Times of Reprogramming
Recovery is not all-tiresome, unrewarded work. There are times of joy and rest, times when we comfortably practice what we have learned. There are times of change, times when we struggle to learn something new or overcome a particular problem.
These are the times when what we've been practicing in recovery begins to show in our life. These times of change are intense, but purposeful.
There are also times when, at a deep level, we are being "reprogrammed." We start letting go of beliefs and behaviors. We may feel frightened or confused during these times. Our old behaviors or patterns may not have worked for us, but they were comfortable and familiar.
During these times we may feel vulnerable, lonely, and needy - like we are on a journey without a road map or a flashlight, and we feel as if no one has traveled this ground before.
We may not understand what is being worked out in us. We may not know where or if we are being led.
We are being led. We are not alone. Our Higher Power is working His finest and best to bring true change in us. Others have traveled this road to. We will be led to someone who can help us, someone who can provide the markers we need.
We are being prepared for receiving as much joy and love as our heart can hold.
Recovery is a healing process. We can trust it, even when we don't understand it. We are right where we need to be in this process; we're going through exactly what we need to experience. And where we're going is better than any place we've been.
Today, God, help me believe that the changes I'm going through are for the good. Help me believe that the road I'm traveling will lead to a place of light, love, and joy
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
(((Live))) - good to see you!
(((Rita))) is dealing with family drama, so please keep the prayers coming.
I am concentrating on school stuff and dad/stepmom are on their way to NC for one of his clients. This is the 2nd trip she's taken with him since yesterday afternoon, and so far, it seems to be a good thing? I get the house to myself (with the furbabies) and they get to spend time together and both have come home in a good mood
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
(((Rita))) is dealing with family drama, so please keep the prayers coming.
I am concentrating on school stuff and dad/stepmom are on their way to NC for one of his clients. This is the 2nd trip she's taken with him since yesterday afternoon, and so far, it seems to be a good thing? I get the house to myself (with the furbabies) and they get to spend time together and both have come home in a good mood
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
mergirl
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Paradise
Posts: 4,161
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
What's Good for Me?
When we are soul searching, be it for the smaller or larger decisions we face during the day, we can learn to ask, is this good for me?... Is this what I really want?... Is this what I need?...Does this direction feel right for me?...or am I succumbing to the control and influence that I sometimes allow others to have over me?
It is not unhealthy selfishness to question if something is good for us. That is an old way of thinking. To ask if something is good for us is a healthy behavior, not to be ashamed of, and will probably work out in the other person's best interests too.
We shall not wander down a selfish path of self-indulgence by asking if a thing is good for us. We shall not stray from God's intended plan, God's highest good, by asking if a thing is good for us. By asking ourselves this simple question, we participate in directing our life toward the highest good and purpose; we own our power to hold ourselves in self-esteem.
Today, I will begin acting in my best interests. I will do this with the understanding that, on occasion, my choices will not please everyone around me. I will do this with the understanding that asking if a thing is good for me will ultimately help me take true responsibility for my life and my choices.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
What's Good for Me?
When we are soul searching, be it for the smaller or larger decisions we face during the day, we can learn to ask, is this good for me?... Is this what I really want?... Is this what I need?...Does this direction feel right for me?...or am I succumbing to the control and influence that I sometimes allow others to have over me?
It is not unhealthy selfishness to question if something is good for us. That is an old way of thinking. To ask if something is good for us is a healthy behavior, not to be ashamed of, and will probably work out in the other person's best interests too.
We shall not wander down a selfish path of self-indulgence by asking if a thing is good for us. We shall not stray from God's intended plan, God's highest good, by asking if a thing is good for us. By asking ourselves this simple question, we participate in directing our life toward the highest good and purpose; we own our power to hold ourselves in self-esteem.
Today, I will begin acting in my best interests. I will do this with the understanding that, on occasion, my choices will not please everyone around me. I will do this with the understanding that asking if a thing is good for me will ultimately help me take true responsibility for my life and my choices.
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