Living In Sobriety Part 23
Miracles Happen
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 9,977
Where is everybody? Oh well, I'll just talk to myself,
so Donna how's your job going,
oh its okay, I am busy and I'm very hungry,
well why didn't you bring lunch to eat,
oh, because I didn't think I would be hungry
so Donna how's your job going,
oh its okay, I am busy and I'm very hungry,
well why didn't you bring lunch to eat,
oh, because I didn't think I would be hungry
glad you stopped by. Yes I too had relapsed after 15 years, so glad you are back. How are you doing today?
Living in sobriety
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 3,870
Welcome Sheila, I read your story.
Bee were you all alone hon? dont worry I am never far..........especially when I make stupid mistakes like I did tonight.
Had bath, dried hair, changed clothes, put make up on travelled the 10 miles to the area meeting only to find a cookery class on the room.
Area meeting next monday....
Bee were you all alone hon? dont worry I am never far..........especially when I make stupid mistakes like I did tonight.
Had bath, dried hair, changed clothes, put make up on travelled the 10 miles to the area meeting only to find a cookery class on the room.
Area meeting next monday....
Last edited by nelco; 11-02-2009 at 01:35 PM. Reason: sp
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Here's me. but when drinking could be found in doorways!
Posts: 1,138
Hi folks.
Im ok... going to a meeting in the mornin... actually i am in a real strange place... feel very distant from the world and all i know... need to touch base at a meeting..
Got scared i thought i broke my sobriety today... took some cough mixture and realised it had alcohol in it... not goin to have it again... will get non alcohol one tomorow...
It feels strange being away from home...
Believe: Remember to take a packed lunch tomorrow to work... a happy belly makes for a happy worker...
Mum: hi there
Im ok... going to a meeting in the mornin... actually i am in a real strange place... feel very distant from the world and all i know... need to touch base at a meeting..
Got scared i thought i broke my sobriety today... took some cough mixture and realised it had alcohol in it... not goin to have it again... will get non alcohol one tomorow...
It feels strange being away from home...
Believe: Remember to take a packed lunch tomorrow to work... a happy belly makes for a happy worker...
Mum: hi there
Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: massachusetts
Posts: 2,216
Hi Sheila, nice to have you join us! I will go read your story!
Haha, Nel...sorry, maybe I shouldn't laugh, but I did. Whenever I attend a function and have to introduce myself, I have to be VERY careful and not say: Hi, I'm Elizabeth and I'm an alcoholic! I have to do a speech here, in 2 weeks, and have already thought about this! Maybe your HP was telling you that BEE was in trouble and needed FOOD!
My, my, I'm chuckling now....
Haha, Nel...sorry, maybe I shouldn't laugh, but I did. Whenever I attend a function and have to introduce myself, I have to be VERY careful and not say: Hi, I'm Elizabeth and I'm an alcoholic! I have to do a speech here, in 2 weeks, and have already thought about this! Maybe your HP was telling you that BEE was in trouble and needed FOOD!
My, my, I'm chuckling now....
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: over the seas and far away
Posts: 862
morning all... sounds like everyone is good.....
it would be great if you could go speak at a meeting for Ro, being a big tourist destination we get a fair few visiting speakers, they are always great to listen to , (my favourite was still the canadian lady who was here for the masters games
) she was so funny!
hi lily... welcome
congrats nan.. thats great... i'm sneaking up behind you ... but i dont want to ever catch up! get my drift..
hello to everyone else...
gotta fly work morning ... speaking of how's fulltime bee? if your finding it an adjustment, you'll feel better when you get regular pay packets
cheers
kate
it would be great if you could go speak at a meeting for Ro, being a big tourist destination we get a fair few visiting speakers, they are always great to listen to , (my favourite was still the canadian lady who was here for the masters games
) she was so funny! hi lily... welcome
congrats nan.. thats great... i'm sneaking up behind you ... but i dont want to ever catch up! get my drift..
hello to everyone else...
gotta fly work morning ... speaking of how's fulltime bee? if your finding it an adjustment, you'll feel better when you get regular pay packets
cheers
kate
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: UK
Posts: 18,299
To Nelco and Donna,
Nelco, I was upset when you suggested I wasn't taking recovery seriously because I am.
I remember you saying once that when you were going to drink wild horses couldn't have stopped you and how grateful you were that your obsession had been removed...but then you blamed me because mine hasn't been removed.
It is possible to be trying hard, to be serious and yet still have the obsession. It is possible to be going to meetings and trying hard to work the Program and still the emotional pain and insanity is building up and for the switch to go off....the switch that says, "despite all I know, I have to drink because it is the only thing that will stop this"....and I have no defence.
This is not me using step 1 as an excuse, I want to be sober, I do not want to drink and so don't need to find excuses. I just want to explain how someone can be doing their best and still slip.
Donna, what I have said to Nelco applies to you too, plus that I do not appreciate you taking my inventory like you did, especially as you were wrong. Also if you react with anger when an alcoholic slips then something is not right with your attitude.
I was going to leave the thread because you both upset me with your assumptions, I still might. I just wanted to explain how I feel to you both.
I hope no-one else on this thread slips but if they do, I hope you treat them with more compassion than judgement.
Nelco, I was upset when you suggested I wasn't taking recovery seriously because I am.
I remember you saying once that when you were going to drink wild horses couldn't have stopped you and how grateful you were that your obsession had been removed...but then you blamed me because mine hasn't been removed.
It is possible to be trying hard, to be serious and yet still have the obsession. It is possible to be going to meetings and trying hard to work the Program and still the emotional pain and insanity is building up and for the switch to go off....the switch that says, "despite all I know, I have to drink because it is the only thing that will stop this"....and I have no defence.
This is not me using step 1 as an excuse, I want to be sober, I do not want to drink and so don't need to find excuses. I just want to explain how someone can be doing their best and still slip.
Donna, what I have said to Nelco applies to you too, plus that I do not appreciate you taking my inventory like you did, especially as you were wrong. Also if you react with anger when an alcoholic slips then something is not right with your attitude.
I was going to leave the thread because you both upset me with your assumptions, I still might. I just wanted to explain how I feel to you both.
I hope no-one else on this thread slips but if they do, I hope you treat them with more compassion than judgement.
Living in sobriety
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 3,870
Originally Posted by louis 
Hi folks.
Im ok... going to a meeting in the mornin... actually i am in a real strange place... feel very distant from the world and all i know... need to touch base at a meeting..
Got scared i thought i broke my sobriety today... took some cough mixture and realised it had alcohol in it... not goin to have it again... will get non alcohol one tomorow...
It feels strange being away from home...
Believe: Remember to take a packed lunch tomorrow to work... a happy belly makes for a happy worker...
Mum: hi there
Im ok... going to a meeting in the mornin... actually i am in a real strange place... feel very distant from the world and all i know... need to touch base at a meeting..
Got scared i thought i broke my sobriety today... took some cough mixture and realised it had alcohol in it... not goin to have it again... will get non alcohol one tomorow...
It feels strange being away from home...
Believe: Remember to take a packed lunch tomorrow to work... a happy belly makes for a happy worker...
Mum: hi there
come back to us in sober please! we miss you when your not here.
Living in sobriety
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 3,870
Stone I hear what you are saying but wonder why you picked the open forum to have this conversation, but if you want it that way I am ok with it too. I stand by anything I have said already.
..... I feel for anyone that picks up a drink. It could be me one day. I have no doubt about that. I have people around me who tell me straight and for that I am glad although I dont always like what they say, but these are real friends.
I hope you can move forward from this and find out what takes you back there instead of focusing on Donna and I.
I can only speak for myself of course and in doing so I feel you are going around in circles a long time here. There will be plenty to come on and applaud you and knock me for saying it to you straight, but I cannot massage your disease each time you drink. You need to find out what brings you back there, where your going wrong and CHANGE!! you are a member here since aug 2005 I see. Is that how long this is going on?? maybe next time you wont survive. I want to sleep at night. I really wish you strong recovery Stone.
..... I feel for anyone that picks up a drink. It could be me one day. I have no doubt about that. I have people around me who tell me straight and for that I am glad although I dont always like what they say, but these are real friends.
I hope you can move forward from this and find out what takes you back there instead of focusing on Donna and I.
I can only speak for myself of course and in doing so I feel you are going around in circles a long time here. There will be plenty to come on and applaud you and knock me for saying it to you straight, but I cannot massage your disease each time you drink. You need to find out what brings you back there, where your going wrong and CHANGE!! you are a member here since aug 2005 I see. Is that how long this is going on?? maybe next time you wont survive. I want to sleep at night. I really wish you strong recovery Stone.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: UK
Posts: 18,299
Originally Posted by nelco
Stone I hear what you are saying but wonder why you picked the open forum to have this conversation, but if you want it that way I am ok with it too. I stand by anything I have said already.
..... I feel for anyone that picks up a drink. It could be me one day. I have no doubt about that. I have people around me who tell me straight and for that I am glad although I dont always like what they say, but these are real friends.
I hope you can move forward from this and find out what takes you back there instead of focusing on Donna and I.
I can only speak for myself of course and in doing so I feel you are going around in circles a long time here. There will be plenty to come on and applaud you and knock me for saying it to you straight, but I cannot massage your disease each time you drink. You need to find out what brings you back there, where your going wrong and CHANGE!! you are a member here since aug 2005 I see. Is that how long this is going on?? maybe next time you wont survive. I want to sleep at night. I really wish you strong recovery Stone.
..... I feel for anyone that picks up a drink. It could be me one day. I have no doubt about that. I have people around me who tell me straight and for that I am glad although I dont always like what they say, but these are real friends.
I hope you can move forward from this and find out what takes you back there instead of focusing on Donna and I.
I can only speak for myself of course and in doing so I feel you are going around in circles a long time here. There will be plenty to come on and applaud you and knock me for saying it to you straight, but I cannot massage your disease each time you drink. You need to find out what brings you back there, where your going wrong and CHANGE!! you are a member here since aug 2005 I see. Is that how long this is going on?? maybe next time you wont survive. I want to sleep at night. I really wish you strong recovery Stone.
I am replying in open forum to things you said in open forum.
I joined in 2005 and then went off and drank for two years, I only joined AA 2 years ago, about a year after I came back here.
Understanding that a person can try and still fail is not massaging my disease it is forgetting step 1.
The only way you can defend what you said and carry on saying it is to assume that I am not serious....if you believe that, it doesn't matter whether you think you are giving it to me straight, you are still wrong.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: UK
Posts: 18,299
Nelly, I know you care and I still like you and Donna, I just wanted to say what I felt.
I don't want it to sound like I am defending my "right to slip", I don't want to slip!
I would just like it if you would see that I am serious and trying my best. I am sure there are things I could do better and I am looking at those.
Also, to use the time I have been struggling against me seems a bit unfair.
I am going to bed now.
I don't want it to sound like I am defending my "right to slip", I don't want to slip!
I would just like it if you would see that I am serious and trying my best. I am sure there are things I could do better and I am looking at those.
Also, to use the time I have been struggling against me seems a bit unfair.
I am going to bed now.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 12,136
Hi Louis. Please do your very best to stay connected. Hang on to your sobriety with all you've got - it's time to create a new experience for yourself - one that doesn't involve alcohol when you might be struggling.
Welcome to the thread, Sheila; I look forward to going back and reading your story.
Stone - I understand your need and want to be heard; I do. I just hope that you can let go of the right to be right. Maybe you're right, maybe Nelcs is right, maybe we've all got it wrong. It matters not - just please, keep the focus on you, and on getting well. You've been doing so well.
I'm doing well. We have a house showing tomorrow so I've been cleaning and baking to make the house smell nice.
I'm concerned for my little sister who is in Scotland - she is expecting, we just found out, and plans to come home. She's in an unfortunate domestic situation and we are anxious to get her back to Canada safely. I really wish I could be with her right now.
Welcome to the thread, Sheila; I look forward to going back and reading your story.
Stone - I understand your need and want to be heard; I do. I just hope that you can let go of the right to be right. Maybe you're right, maybe Nelcs is right, maybe we've all got it wrong. It matters not - just please, keep the focus on you, and on getting well. You've been doing so well.
I'm doing well. We have a house showing tomorrow so I've been cleaning and baking to make the house smell nice.
I'm concerned for my little sister who is in Scotland - she is expecting, we just found out, and plans to come home. She's in an unfortunate domestic situation and we are anxious to get her back to Canada safely. I really wish I could be with her right now.
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