historyteach

Here's Part III of our Bi Polar Town thread!
Wow, and what a ride it's been! :bounce

Ya know, I miss the stories we use to tell about the picnics around the pond, and the gardens and the flowers...

What stories are there to tell now? The seasons have changed, but, every season has its stories, yes?

Carry on, BP Townies!

Shalom!

OXFORD

Nothing feels too different. A little tiredness, that's been the common feeling all day and I've been sleeping on and off since 5am, it's now 9pm.

Live

Stay with me here, Oxford, okay?

Please acknowledge.

Live

Did you get my last pm?

Live

We have never bs'ed each other...have you been drinking?

Live

Oxford has logged out. I hope he hasn't passed out unconsious or run from help.
He is one of my buddies!

OXFORD

I went to lie down for a few minutes, sorry.

OXFORD

there seem to be more cop cars, they don't appear to be going anywhere and I'm starting to feel better.

historyteach

Thanks for letting us know you're ok, Oxford.
It's good to hear!

Shalom!

unholy_mess

Hate to interrupt (hope all is well Oxford!), but I have a question...I've heard a lot about mood charts...do any of you find them helpful? And why?

historyteach

Hi, unholy mess,
Many people find mood charts helpful.
What you'll find is that there may be specific times of the month that your moods swing. So, there may be hormonal imbalances, for example. Your meds will be noted, and may be regulated as a direct result of the mood chart. It will give you and your doc a clear picture of what's going on.

And if you add food and exercise too your chart, you'll get to see the effects of those on your moods too.

Many people really have benefitted from the mood charts. I hope you try it out.
If you do, please let us know how it goes.

Shalom!

hippyhippy

Hi folks,

sorry I am out of the loop a bit again.

Live, I am so sorry you are having such a horrid time with hubs. I must have missed the beginning of this story. I am so so sorry hunny. You are a beautiful kind loving person and you do not deserve to be treated badly.

Nadm, your painting is beautiful. You certainly are talented.

Hi unholy mess. Nice to meet you.

Wow, it is two weeks since I last posted. Sorry folks. I am going through a real tough time just now. At the moment I am taking diazepam to calm anxiety. Finding it really really hard to see light at end of tunnel. I know if I don't buck up soon I will be looking at hospital again. Things have gotten such a mess. Hate how I cannot maintain stability for any length of time. So scared of ruining family christmas.

Love to you all
Hippy
xx

jurneyman

Hippy, Maybe a suggestion, Try to just keep a positive mental picture of what you would like Christmas to be for you and your family. The power of that thought just might get you from where you are, to where you would like to be. Good to hear from you. JM

unholy_mess

Ooooh...I think I really like the idea of a mood chart! Just had an appointment with the shrink and he, too, thinks it's a good idea. I'm a scientist and we really love our graphs! Will be sure to report back! Thanks, Historyteach!

hippyhippy

Thanks,
I am actually feeling better than when I wrote that post. I have consulted a lawyer re my employment situation and found out that they are behaving illegally. I needed a diazepam to do this, but thankful that I did.

Just doing something about this one situation has helped lift the cloud a little.

Hippy
x

cinderellawkids

Im glad its helping hippy.
I need to make an appointment soon, things arent right, Im not me and so tired of primary docs saying its normal.
In the meantime Im trying to rest mentally

OXFORD

The paramedics came and took me away after they heard what I had done. So I spent 3 days in the hospital having my entire system irrigated, that wasn't the worst. The police arrived to tell me about an outstanding warrant they had from when I didn't show up at court, due to me being too ill to even move that day I couldn't even stand up and I didn't know that court dates aren't the kind of thing you can reschedule. So Thursday night my anxiety was spiraling into a full blown panic attack over the fear of being arrested. Didn't make things any easier on me at the time, I'm still traumatized over being thrown in jail last year due to an extreme fear that my life was being put in danger, this month was the time where the courts set a date for me to appear. The complete array of anxieties over these past 3 days have left me exhausted and feeling kind of frail. Unfortunately it's become obvious that the stress of having to face this crap all over again is likely what led me to making the dumb choice of taking too many pills. I want to move on so much it aches and the stress isn't helping much either, I'm ready but I still feel tied to stuff I have to deal with before I'm finally able to focus on school without the pressure of being held down by past griefs. Still it's remarkable that nothing serious happened to me physically, and I should have dealt with these problems in a more capable state instead of postponing whatever cause I was too afraid of losing my freedom. I'll feel better in a few days, still hating wondering if going through crap like this enough times means I'll lose something vital about my personality, it scares me that I could no longer know how to make those I care about laugh and feel happy.

historyteach

Anything new on the employment situation, Hippy?
Please let us know how you're doing.
We care...

Shalom!

hippyhippy

Thanks Teach,

I am not doing too well at the mo. Pretty self destructive. Job situation is that I am avoiding anything to do with it. I have no strength for a legal fight nor do I have any for reapplying for posts and attending interviews. Particularly as I have worked in a qualified post for 13 years and they want me to apply for posts with half my salary and sitting at a computer desk all day. They do not value me at all despite the fact I gave them 11 years good service before I got ill.
I have pdoc on monday and common sense is to tell him how much I have slipped but I really really want my drivers license back. If I tell him just how self destructive I have been, he will never agree to me getting my license back.
I have an appointment with an employment adviser on Monday too that my cpn is dragging me along to. Don't know if anything will come of that.I have no desire to go at all.
Thanks for asking. Maybe I will be a bit sharper after seeing pdoc and this blooming employment adviser.
Hippy
xx

nandm

Hippy you have been in my thoughts. Thanks for the update. I hope the pd doc can help you out.