_Doll’s Damn-Near Daily Ditty_
not a greeter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: padmasana
Posts: 13,927
Did you call about the sleep study PD 
? I think insurance usually covers it. My step father had to have one after his near death experience brought on by the undiagnosed sleep apnea. Insurance covered it and now they cover the bi pap machine/ mask he wears at night. The hardest part of the whole thing was getting his ass to make the appointment. So we did that for him. He said the actual sleep study was kinda fun (I guess he didn't sleep much) 
.
Have fun gagging on yourself. I would take advantage of it. I know I did when I went to IOP. It was comforting knowing the other people were FORCED to listen to me blab on and on :chatter.
? I think insurance usually covers it. My step father had to have one after his near death experience brought on by the undiagnosed sleep apnea. Insurance covered it and now they cover the bi pap machine/ mask he wears at night. The hardest part of the whole thing was getting his ass to make the appointment. So we did that for him. He said the actual sleep study was kinda fun (I guess he didn't sleep much) .Have fun gagging on yourself. I would take advantage of it. I know I did when I went to IOP. It was comforting knowing the other people were FORCED to listen to me blab on and on :chatter.
Its_me_jen
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
Lots of gagging ........ it actually went well. I need to get to more AA meetings and of course, the gym!
Today sucks. My sleep is out of control. I didn't call my insurance yet.
May be today?
I had to literally drag myself out of bed and force myself to get dressed. I got to work (late), parked, and then had to lie down in my car. I slept for about 30 minutes. WTF! My boss probably thinks I was out all night partying because that's what I look like. Shite!
I ran across this yesterday: Delayed sleep phase syndrome - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
I'm pretty sure this is what I've got. Next step, get the damn sleep study done.
Today sucks. My sleep is out of control. I didn't call my insurance yet.
May be today?
I had to literally drag myself out of bed and force myself to get dressed. I got to work (late), parked, and then had to lie down in my car. I slept for about 30 minutes. WTF! My boss probably thinks I was out all night partying because that's what I look like. Shite!
I ran across this yesterday: Delayed sleep phase syndrome - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
I'm pretty sure this is what I've got. Next step, get the damn sleep study done.
Its_me_jen
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
I'm going to talk to the Doc at IOP tonight about referring me to a sleep specialist. This is craziness.
It was a good weekend with C and her family. We always have a good time.
Of course, it's Monday and I'm tired and I'm grumpy and I want to go back to sleep. I'll get over it.
It was a good weekend with C and her family. We always have a good time.
Of course, it's Monday and I'm tired and I'm grumpy and I want to go back to sleep. I'll get over it.
Its_me_jen
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
So. I took a mental health day on Wednesday. I was so tired when I woke up (late) in the morning. I had to sleep more and I just felt overwhelmed and sort of depressed. I called my boss and told him I just needed the day off. I was worn out and just needed a day. It felt good being so honest about it. Either way, I always feel so guilty and crappy about myself when I stay home and sleep and be lazy. I know I just have to take care of myself sometimes and sometimes we just have days like that. Thursday, yesterday, was good. Busy day at work, go a lot done.
But then, on my way to IOP ..... I still get nervous, butterflies in my stomach and all that. By the time I got there I was so anxious and emotional. Not sure what's going on. Overall, it was a good group night. When I got home I took some clonazopam and actually got my butt in bed around 11ish. I feel asleep pretty quickly. Of course I woke up late AGAIN. I makes me want to scream. I set my alarm for 630am and unknowingly snooze it for hours. C usually comes in eventually and says "Hey, it's 8!" It drives her nuts listening to my alarm.
I did talk to the doc at IOP about a sleep specialist but she's sort of like talking to a brick wall. Anyway, she gave me Remeron (mirtazapine) to try for sleep. I told her my sleep meds, Ambien & Lunesta, aren't working well anymore. The remeron is an anti-D but taken in low doses can help with sleep. I'll give it a try over the weekend.
I decided I'm going to do some research and find a really good sleep disorder specialist here in town. Not someone who asks "Do you have sleep apnea? Do you have restless leg?" That's what they all ask and I know I don't have sleep apnea and 98% sure I don't have RLS. Sooooo, I want someone who will look at other possibilities. There are hundreds of different sleep disorders. I want investigate any that my symptoms may fit.
That's all I know or my brain is done.
Sober 31 days today!
Peace and hugs.
Out.
But then, on my way to IOP ..... I still get nervous, butterflies in my stomach and all that. By the time I got there I was so anxious and emotional. Not sure what's going on. Overall, it was a good group night. When I got home I took some clonazopam and actually got my butt in bed around 11ish. I feel asleep pretty quickly. Of course I woke up late AGAIN. I makes me want to scream. I set my alarm for 630am and unknowingly snooze it for hours. C usually comes in eventually and says "Hey, it's 8!" It drives her nuts listening to my alarm.
I did talk to the doc at IOP about a sleep specialist but she's sort of like talking to a brick wall. Anyway, she gave me Remeron (mirtazapine) to try for sleep. I told her my sleep meds, Ambien & Lunesta, aren't working well anymore. The remeron is an anti-D but taken in low doses can help with sleep. I'll give it a try over the weekend.
I decided I'm going to do some research and find a really good sleep disorder specialist here in town. Not someone who asks "Do you have sleep apnea? Do you have restless leg?" That's what they all ask and I know I don't have sleep apnea and 98% sure I don't have RLS. Sooooo, I want someone who will look at other possibilities. There are hundreds of different sleep disorders. I want investigate any that my symptoms may fit.
That's all I know or my brain is done.
Sober 31 days today!
Peace and hugs.
Out.
Its_me_jen
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
Just want to save some links:
Can a night owl become a morning person? A Slate experiment.
Delayed sleep phase syndrome
Remeron (Mirtazapine) drug description
Can a night owl become a morning person? A Slate experiment.
Delayed sleep phase syndrome
Remeron (Mirtazapine) drug description
To Life!
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
Congratulations on the 31 days!!! 
Hae you ever had Trazadone to help you sleep? I found that very helpful before. It's a mild antidepressant too, that *lets* you sleep. It doesn't *make* you go to sleep. And if you wake up in the middle of the night, as I was at the time, with my mind going a mile a minute, it let me get back to sleep too. I loved it!
If you take it, take it 10 hours *before* you want to wake up. That way, you don't get the groggy "hang over" effect many meds can give you.
Shalom!
Hae you ever had Trazadone to help you sleep? I found that very helpful before. It's a mild antidepressant too, that *lets* you sleep. It doesn't *make* you go to sleep. And if you wake up in the middle of the night, as I was at the time, with my mind going a mile a minute, it let me get back to sleep too. I loved it!
If you take it, take it 10 hours *before* you want to wake up. That way, you don't get the groggy "hang over" effect many meds can give you.
Shalom!
Its_me_jen
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
I have used it though it was a long time ago. I remember that I only took it for a short time because It made me feel ill in the morning. I've also been on ambien and lunesta and rozeram and clonazopam.
If the remeron doesn't work, I'm going to try melatonin. Time-released capsules.
If the remeron doesn't work, I'm going to try melatonin. Time-released capsules.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Washington
Posts: 137
Hey paperdolls - wow, sounds like your going through alot, hang in there!
I'm kind of anti-medication also - i don't like taking stuff, but sometimes you have to. I used to be on paxil for about 6 months or so when i was having really bad panic attacks a few years ago. i followed dr. orders and then she tapered me off. just listen to your body and your doctor and i hope you stay safe.
on a side note - i think anybody can post information on Wikipedia, so I wouldn't trust everything you read on there. Take Care!
I'm kind of anti-medication also - i don't like taking stuff, but sometimes you have to. I used to be on paxil for about 6 months or so when i was having really bad panic attacks a few years ago. i followed dr. orders and then she tapered me off. just listen to your body and your doctor and i hope you stay safe.
on a side note - i think anybody can post information on Wikipedia, so I wouldn't trust everything you read on there. Take Care!
Its_me_jen
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
I've taken the remeron 3 nights now ..... each with a different result, none of them horrible really. I'll give it a week or so then I'm thinking of trying NO sleep meds.
It was a good weekend. Sort of lazy but got caught up on laundry and C made dinner last night that was way yummy!
Thursday night is my last night at IOP. I'm nervous about my little goodbye speech I have to give. Speaking in front of people like that isn't my idea of fun.
34 days. All in all, I'm doing well.
I'm not caught up on so much going on here at SR. So please forgive me if you've got something going on in your life that I've not acknowledged. It's not personal; I've not been spending lots of time here and just miss stuff often. I'm feeling guilty for it! Thank you for all of your support.
It was a good weekend. Sort of lazy but got caught up on laundry and C made dinner last night that was way yummy!
Thursday night is my last night at IOP. I'm nervous about my little goodbye speech I have to give. Speaking in front of people like that isn't my idea of fun.
34 days. All in all, I'm doing well.
I'm not caught up on so much going on here at SR. So please forgive me if you've got something going on in your life that I've not acknowledged. It's not personal; I've not been spending lots of time here and just miss stuff often. I'm feeling guilty for it! Thank you for all of your support.
Its_me_jen
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
I'm still not sure about the remeron.
I'm going to keep giving it a try.
If it doesn't work I'm going sleep med free.
Thursday is my last day at IOP. Looking forward to it.
I'll get myself to a few meetings every week starting next week.
I'm going to keep giving it a try.
If it doesn't work I'm going sleep med free.
Thursday is my last day at IOP. Looking forward to it.
I'll get myself to a few meetings every week starting next week.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 12,136
It sounds like you've got a good plan, Jen. Let us know how last night at IOP goes. You'll do great - just speak from the heart.
Hey I use melatonin extra-strength occasionally for sleep and it helps a lot. I used to take sleeping pills (prescribed and non) back in the day when I didn't abuse them (THAT didn't last long) - so I take nothing stronger than the melatonin. It may or may not work.
I went through a spell (several, actually) where I would sleep through the night but couldn't get my azz out of bed in the morning. Always snoozing the alarm, running out the door late. Felt like I wasn't sleeping or something. I have RLS - but it's usually when I'm just about to fall asleep, so I don't think it was that. Anyway, it passed. I take Paxil 20 mgs for depression and it's been the best fit yet. I almost feel manic, I feel so good.
I'm still tired in the morning, but not half-dead like I used to be.
Good luck!
Hey I use melatonin extra-strength occasionally for sleep and it helps a lot. I used to take sleeping pills (prescribed and non) back in the day when I didn't abuse them (THAT didn't last long) - so I take nothing stronger than the melatonin. It may or may not work.
I went through a spell (several, actually) where I would sleep through the night but couldn't get my azz out of bed in the morning. Always snoozing the alarm, running out the door late. Felt like I wasn't sleeping or something. I have RLS - but it's usually when I'm just about to fall asleep, so I don't think it was that. Anyway, it passed. I take Paxil 20 mgs for depression and it's been the best fit yet. I almost feel manic, I feel so good.
I'm still tired in the morning, but not half-dead like I used to be.
Good luck!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: UK
Posts: 18,299
OK, you may hate me now....but there isn't a magic pill that fixes things, Jen.
All Doctors can do is prescribe pills...they don't all work. If you go to them and describe a set of symptoms they automatically prescribe certain pills
This isn't medical advice! But how about no sleep meds, like you said?
Anyhoo, I loves ya Doll-face.
All Doctors can do is prescribe pills...they don't all work. If you go to them and describe a set of symptoms they automatically prescribe certain pills
This isn't medical advice! But how about no sleep meds, like you said?
Anyhoo, I loves ya Doll-face.
Its_me_jen
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
Stone, if you find the magic pill please let me know. I've been on the hunt for it most of my life!
Row: I'll probably end up trying the melatonin sooner or later. I tried it years ago as a tea. If I remember right it didn't do much for me then. It was long enough ago that I'm sure it's different now.
So, I went to a meeting tonight. *pat on the back* It was good but my anxiety is out of control. I was more nervous tonight then I've been in forever. When I spoke, I could hear my voice shaking. It's weird, because I don't know what I'm so anxious about. It starts in my stomach first, not my head .......... any way I hate feeling like this for no reason. I suppose there's a reason but I have no clue wtf it is.
They asked if there were any announcements ........... is that when you talk about birthdays? Is 30 days a birthday I'm supposed to mention? As long as I've been doing this I sure don't know what I'm doing!
Row: I'll probably end up trying the melatonin sooner or later. I tried it years ago as a tea. If I remember right it didn't do much for me then. It was long enough ago that I'm sure it's different now.
So, I went to a meeting tonight. *pat on the back* It was good but my anxiety is out of control. I was more nervous tonight then I've been in forever. When I spoke, I could hear my voice shaking. It's weird, because I don't know what I'm so anxious about. It starts in my stomach first, not my head .......... any way I hate feeling like this for no reason. I suppose there's a reason but I have no clue wtf it is.
They asked if there were any announcements ........... is that when you talk about birthdays? Is 30 days a birthday I'm supposed to mention? As long as I've been doing this I sure don't know what I'm doing!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 12,136
Here in Canada when they do announcements I would raise my hand and say that so-and-so has 1 year on the 20th of Aug and it will be celebrated at such and such church at whatever time.
Now - for your 30 days - do your groups not give out chips/medallions to mark periods of sobriety in your first year? I believe they do. When they do the chips, you walk to the front and collect your 30 day chip. It's done for you, but it's also done to show the newcomer that the program works.
And by all means, if you haven't collected your 30 day chip, there is nothing wrong with announcing that you recently celebrated this milestone - when they do the announcements.
Have you connected with anyone f2f yet?
One of my sponsees gets really bad anxiety and she hasn't been able to share yet. That's okay. For now, she just introduces herself, and says she would like to listen. It's a good warm-up for her.
And I still get all shaky inside sometimes when I share. Not as much as I used to, but it's quite common. Even sharing that helps - others will more than likely be able to identify with the fear of speaking in front of others, of being judged, ya know?
.. and although I may regret doing so, I would have to agree that Stone has a point re the magic pill thing. I searched all over for that elusive pill and never DID find it!
Glad you got to that meeting, Jen. *hug*
Now - for your 30 days - do your groups not give out chips/medallions to mark periods of sobriety in your first year? I believe they do. When they do the chips, you walk to the front and collect your 30 day chip. It's done for you, but it's also done to show the newcomer that the program works.
And by all means, if you haven't collected your 30 day chip, there is nothing wrong with announcing that you recently celebrated this milestone - when they do the announcements.
Have you connected with anyone f2f yet?
One of my sponsees gets really bad anxiety and she hasn't been able to share yet. That's okay. For now, she just introduces herself, and says she would like to listen. It's a good warm-up for her.
And I still get all shaky inside sometimes when I share. Not as much as I used to, but it's quite common. Even sharing that helps - others will more than likely be able to identify with the fear of speaking in front of others, of being judged, ya know?
.. and although I may regret doing so, I would have to agree that Stone has a point re the magic pill thing. I searched all over for that elusive pill and never DID find it!
Glad you got to that meeting, Jen. *hug*
Its_me_jen
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
My inpatient group doesn't do chips for 30 days, actually usually people aren't in it that long. You get a chip when you graduate and then you can go back and get a 1yr, 2yr, 5yr, etc..... The IOP group isn't AA, at all.
I haven't found a "home group" and haven't connected with anyone yet. This Tuesday meeting I went to yesterday is one that I've been to quite often and it's a small group so they know me although none of them has approched me about being a newbie etc. That's ok though.....There's a Wednesday meeting that I've only been to once so far but it was the best meeting I've ever been to. The first time ever I was given a first step meeting (I think that's what they call it). They gave me all their numbers and stuff. Anyway.....blah, I'm rambling. I'm going to make that my regular meeting as soon as I have time...probably next week. :chatter
The magic pill ..... I know it doesn't exist and really as much as it may seem like that's what I'm looking for, I'm really not. :ghug3
I haven't found a "home group" and haven't connected with anyone yet. This Tuesday meeting I went to yesterday is one that I've been to quite often and it's a small group so they know me although none of them has approched me about being a newbie etc. That's ok though.....There's a Wednesday meeting that I've only been to once so far but it was the best meeting I've ever been to. The first time ever I was given a first step meeting (I think that's what they call it). They gave me all their numbers and stuff. Anyway.....blah, I'm rambling. I'm going to make that my regular meeting as soon as I have time...probably next week. :chatter
The magic pill ..... I know it doesn't exist and really as much as it may seem like that's what I'm looking for, I'm really not. :ghug3
Its_me_jen
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
I liked this today.
_______
from: "Empty on the Inside"
When I was two weeks sober, a man's nine-year-old daughter was killed by a drunk driver, and three days later he was at a meeting saying he had to believe it wasn't for nothing. That maybe one alcoholic would get sober because of it. As I left that day, I found myself wondering what would have happened if that had been my kids, or me? What would they remember about me? A feeling came over me (I know now it was gratitude), and I realized that I could call my children right then and tell them I loved them. That I could show up when I said I would. That my word could be worth something to them. That even though I might always just be "mom who comes over on the weekends," I could be a good weekend mom. I had a chance to move forward with them, forging a relationship built on a foundation of God and Alcoholics Anonymous, rather than always trying to make up for the past. One year later I was able to share with that man that maybe it hadn't been for nothing, because my life changed that day.
© 2001, AAWS, Inc., Alcoholics Anonymous, page 520
_______
from: "Empty on the Inside"
When I was two weeks sober, a man's nine-year-old daughter was killed by a drunk driver, and three days later he was at a meeting saying he had to believe it wasn't for nothing. That maybe one alcoholic would get sober because of it. As I left that day, I found myself wondering what would have happened if that had been my kids, or me? What would they remember about me? A feeling came over me (I know now it was gratitude), and I realized that I could call my children right then and tell them I loved them. That I could show up when I said I would. That my word could be worth something to them. That even though I might always just be "mom who comes over on the weekends," I could be a good weekend mom. I had a chance to move forward with them, forging a relationship built on a foundation of God and Alcoholics Anonymous, rather than always trying to make up for the past. One year later I was able to share with that man that maybe it hadn't been for nothing, because my life changed that day.
© 2001, AAWS, Inc., Alcoholics Anonymous, page 520
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