Dailies from ODAT part II
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Meredith, I needed to read this today. Sometimes my mind wanders back to the "why?" or "what did I do wrong", questions that only drag me back to the darkness of codependency.
Reading this today reminds me of how good it felt when I first walked into the rooms and discovered that his addiction wasn't about me at all. But my recovery was. And I stopped living in the problem (his addiction) and began living in the solution (my recovery). And that has made all the difference.
Hugs and Thank You for posting these readings.
Reading this today reminds me of how good it felt when I first walked into the rooms and discovered that his addiction wasn't about me at all. But my recovery was. And I stopped living in the problem (his addiction) and began living in the solution (my recovery). And that has made all the difference.
Hugs and Thank You for posting these readings.
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
thanks for your kind words and sharing, Ann - I agree with what you said there. I had to learn, first, that addiction defies logic. Right on the heels of that knowledge is learning that "insanity is doing the same thing again and again," i.e., there I was, attempting to teach logic to the addict...
Hugs right back to you!
Hugs right back to you!
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 5 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
Life with the Al-Anon program, to which we turn when we are deep in trouble, may ultimately confront us with a special challenge.
At first, we may come as doubters: “How can my terrible problem be solved by joining a group?” Then come the revelations. We learn how to live and find serenity in the midst of alcoholic turmoil. We see ourselves growing, understanding, helping.
But once the major problem is eliminated by the alcoholic’s joining AA, we may feel we’re old-timers at this Al-Anon business; we think we “have it made.” We skip meetings; have no time to comfort troubled newcomers, forget about reading Al-Anon books.
Then, comes the challenge of continued problems and we realize how much we still need Al-Anon to keep ourselves able to meet them.
TODAY’S REMINDER
I don’t resort to Al-Anon only to learn to live with the active drinking problem. It is my way of life, an increasingly rich and rewarding life, as I learn to use the program in depth.
“AA brings the drinker to sobriety in order to fit him to absorb the deeper meanings of the program. Al-Anon changes our thinking for the same purpose.”
Life with the Al-Anon program, to which we turn when we are deep in trouble, may ultimately confront us with a special challenge.
At first, we may come as doubters: “How can my terrible problem be solved by joining a group?” Then come the revelations. We learn how to live and find serenity in the midst of alcoholic turmoil. We see ourselves growing, understanding, helping.
But once the major problem is eliminated by the alcoholic’s joining AA, we may feel we’re old-timers at this Al-Anon business; we think we “have it made.” We skip meetings; have no time to comfort troubled newcomers, forget about reading Al-Anon books.
Then, comes the challenge of continued problems and we realize how much we still need Al-Anon to keep ourselves able to meet them.
TODAY’S REMINDER
I don’t resort to Al-Anon only to learn to live with the active drinking problem. It is my way of life, an increasingly rich and rewarding life, as I learn to use the program in depth.
“AA brings the drinker to sobriety in order to fit him to absorb the deeper meanings of the program. Al-Anon changes our thinking for the same purpose.”
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 6 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
More than two thousand years ago, an ancient philosopher wrote some words of wisdom whose central ideas seem strangely modern to us who study the Twelve Steps. They concern the errors we humans, since the beginning of time, seem to fall into:
A man is not complete who believes that his advancement depends on crushing others – Or who worries about matters that cannot be altered – Or who insists that a thing is impossible because he has not been able to do it.
That man is short of wisdom, who cannot put aside his ordinary routine in order to refresh his mind with rest, change and meditation.
He needs much help who thinks he can compel others to do what seem right to him.
TODAY’S REMINDER
Words of wisdom inspire us, but they have value only if we can take them into our hearts and use them in our daily lives.
“The basic truths which are placed before me in Al-Anon have immeasurable power to help me.”
More than two thousand years ago, an ancient philosopher wrote some words of wisdom whose central ideas seem strangely modern to us who study the Twelve Steps. They concern the errors we humans, since the beginning of time, seem to fall into:
A man is not complete who believes that his advancement depends on crushing others – Or who worries about matters that cannot be altered – Or who insists that a thing is impossible because he has not been able to do it.
That man is short of wisdom, who cannot put aside his ordinary routine in order to refresh his mind with rest, change and meditation.
He needs much help who thinks he can compel others to do what seem right to him.
TODAY’S REMINDER
Words of wisdom inspire us, but they have value only if we can take them into our hearts and use them in our daily lives.
“The basic truths which are placed before me in Al-Anon have immeasurable power to help me.”
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 7 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
These words, long thought to have been dated 1692 and found, so the legend goes, in a Baltimore churchyard, were actually the inspiring work of a modern Terre Haute, Indiana poet named Max Ehrmann, and dated 1927. Its apt title: Desiderata.
“Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they, too, have their story.”
TODAY’S REMINDER
Like our Serenity Prayer, repeating these phrases each morning could establish our mood for that day – and make the day a good one. It could serve as a reminder that we must watch the quality of our own deportment, and as we learn in Al-Anon, everything depends on that!
“I will not let my inner peace be disturbed by the confusions around me. I will be gentle and tolerant, while maintaining my right to my individuality. I will listen and appreciate, and not judge the source of what I hear.”
These words, long thought to have been dated 1692 and found, so the legend goes, in a Baltimore churchyard, were actually the inspiring work of a modern Terre Haute, Indiana poet named Max Ehrmann, and dated 1927. Its apt title: Desiderata.
“Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they, too, have their story.”
TODAY’S REMINDER
Like our Serenity Prayer, repeating these phrases each morning could establish our mood for that day – and make the day a good one. It could serve as a reminder that we must watch the quality of our own deportment, and as we learn in Al-Anon, everything depends on that!
“I will not let my inner peace be disturbed by the confusions around me. I will be gentle and tolerant, while maintaining my right to my individuality. I will listen and appreciate, and not judge the source of what I hear.”
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 7 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
These words, long thought to have been dated 1692 and found, so the legend goes, in a Baltimore churchyard, were actually the inspiring work of a modern Terre Haute, Indiana poet named Max Ehrmann, and dated 1927. Its apt title: Desiderata.
“Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they, too, have their story.”
TODAY’S REMINDER
Like our Serenity Prayer, repeating these phrases each morning could establish our mood for that day – and make the day a good one. It could serve as a reminder that we must watch the quality of our own deportment, and as we learn in Al-Anon, everything depends on that!
“I will not let my inner peace be disturbed by the confusions around me. I will be gentle and tolerant, while maintaining my right to my individuality. I will listen and appreciate, and not judge the source of what I hear.”
These words, long thought to have been dated 1692 and found, so the legend goes, in a Baltimore churchyard, were actually the inspiring work of a modern Terre Haute, Indiana poet named Max Ehrmann, and dated 1927. Its apt title: Desiderata.
“Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they, too, have their story.”
TODAY’S REMINDER
Like our Serenity Prayer, repeating these phrases each morning could establish our mood for that day – and make the day a good one. It could serve as a reminder that we must watch the quality of our own deportment, and as we learn in Al-Anon, everything depends on that!
“I will not let my inner peace be disturbed by the confusions around me. I will be gentle and tolerant, while maintaining my right to my individuality. I will listen and appreciate, and not judge the source of what I hear.”
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 8 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
It’s a sad day for an Al-Anon group when its members settle down into old-timer status and the meetings are mere get-togethers for a bit of chatting and gossip.
Gone is the vitality and hope that inspired the group in the early days – gone the eager exchange of experience, strength and hope, the challenge to apply the program to every department of life. And gone is the hand of friendship that reached out to troubled people and drew them into the fold to learn about the Steps to serenity, confidence, renewed faith – all accomplished through our help and caring.
TODAY’S REMINDER
I will not forget that the possibilities of this vast spiritual program are still limitless for me. I still have much to learn in it. Let me remember, too, that an al-Anon group is a vital feature of any community’ there are so many to whom it could bring hope! I will try to find them, through churches, doctors, courts and counselors – and share Al-Anon with them.
“Each day is a new adventure in Al-Anon, pointing the way to an ever-better way to live.”
It’s a sad day for an Al-Anon group when its members settle down into old-timer status and the meetings are mere get-togethers for a bit of chatting and gossip.
Gone is the vitality and hope that inspired the group in the early days – gone the eager exchange of experience, strength and hope, the challenge to apply the program to every department of life. And gone is the hand of friendship that reached out to troubled people and drew them into the fold to learn about the Steps to serenity, confidence, renewed faith – all accomplished through our help and caring.
TODAY’S REMINDER
I will not forget that the possibilities of this vast spiritual program are still limitless for me. I still have much to learn in it. Let me remember, too, that an al-Anon group is a vital feature of any community’ there are so many to whom it could bring hope! I will try to find them, through churches, doctors, courts and counselors – and share Al-Anon with them.
“Each day is a new adventure in Al-Anon, pointing the way to an ever-better way to live.”
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 9 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
It is heartening to know that Al-Anon members can be a worldwide inspiration to each other; thoughts and prayers fly across space to sustain and strengthen us all. These wise words come from the Al-Anon groups of France:
We have all had the feeling of being chained to a heavy weight that we were trying to drag this way and that, while all the time it was dragging us until we completely lost our bearings.
Now, there is another chain for us; the one that unites us in Al-Anon. Each of us is a link, neither more nor less important than all the rest. It is a chain to which we can attach ourselves whenever we need it.
TODAY’S REMINDER
What a relief to be able to detach ourselves from the chain that bound us to the weight of alcoholism – to know we need not be helplessly controlled by it. We are freed by knowing we cannot exert the slightest influence on it. How light and pleasant it is to be a link in that other chain that binds us together in al-Anon, and to discover how to correct the attitudes that keep us chained to our anxieties.
“He that handleth a matter wisely shall find good.”
It is heartening to know that Al-Anon members can be a worldwide inspiration to each other; thoughts and prayers fly across space to sustain and strengthen us all. These wise words come from the Al-Anon groups of France:
We have all had the feeling of being chained to a heavy weight that we were trying to drag this way and that, while all the time it was dragging us until we completely lost our bearings.
Now, there is another chain for us; the one that unites us in Al-Anon. Each of us is a link, neither more nor less important than all the rest. It is a chain to which we can attach ourselves whenever we need it.
TODAY’S REMINDER
What a relief to be able to detach ourselves from the chain that bound us to the weight of alcoholism – to know we need not be helplessly controlled by it. We are freed by knowing we cannot exert the slightest influence on it. How light and pleasant it is to be a link in that other chain that binds us together in al-Anon, and to discover how to correct the attitudes that keep us chained to our anxieties.
“He that handleth a matter wisely shall find good.”
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 10 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
My life is a series of unfolding – incidents and occasions, agreeable or distressing. Each day is full of them, hour by hour, and this makes it difficult for me to take a detached view of all that is happening. I’m too close.
If these occurrences were like so many pieces of merchandise – groceries or dry goods – I would see them clearly, good and bad. Looking at the incidents of my life in this way, I might be astonished to discover that the good far outweighs the bad. And yet, I concentrate so heavily on my trials and burdens that I hardly give a thought to relishing the pleasant and satisfying things that happen each day.
This noticing is an acute awareness of our surroundings and what takes place in them. It can be cultivated, like watching a play or film.
TODAY’S REMINDER
If I learn to see everything with a fresh eye, I will find I have many reasons for contentment and gratitude. When I find myself being bogged down with negative thoughts, I will deliberately turn away from them.
“Let me observe, with new interest, even the commonplace things that happen in each new day.”
My life is a series of unfolding – incidents and occasions, agreeable or distressing. Each day is full of them, hour by hour, and this makes it difficult for me to take a detached view of all that is happening. I’m too close.
If these occurrences were like so many pieces of merchandise – groceries or dry goods – I would see them clearly, good and bad. Looking at the incidents of my life in this way, I might be astonished to discover that the good far outweighs the bad. And yet, I concentrate so heavily on my trials and burdens that I hardly give a thought to relishing the pleasant and satisfying things that happen each day.
This noticing is an acute awareness of our surroundings and what takes place in them. It can be cultivated, like watching a play or film.
TODAY’S REMINDER
If I learn to see everything with a fresh eye, I will find I have many reasons for contentment and gratitude. When I find myself being bogged down with negative thoughts, I will deliberately turn away from them.
“Let me observe, with new interest, even the commonplace things that happen in each new day.”
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 11 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
It is often emphasized in Al-Anon writings and in talk at meetings that ours is not a religious program, but a spiritual one. The central truth of all worship, creed, church or dogma is that God is the essence of our being, and this is the spiritual idea of Al-Anon.
If we stop going to church, we may think that we are disposing of a god who has disappointed us. We may see Him as a punisher who has sought us out with unmerited pain and suffering. However we regard Him, or even if we do not recognize Him at all, He is always there, within us, within everyu thing and every person in the universe, constantly available for our help if we are willing to accept. How well we use the consciousness of God in our daily lives depends not on Him, but on us.
TODAY’S REMINDER
I have observed that those who make the best progress in the al-Anon program are those who readily accept the help of a Higher Power. Once they can do that, it is easier for them to Let Go and Let god, and their problems resolve themselves in a way that passes human understanding.
“Lord, thou hast been our dwelling place in all generations.” - Psalms
It is often emphasized in Al-Anon writings and in talk at meetings that ours is not a religious program, but a spiritual one. The central truth of all worship, creed, church or dogma is that God is the essence of our being, and this is the spiritual idea of Al-Anon.
If we stop going to church, we may think that we are disposing of a god who has disappointed us. We may see Him as a punisher who has sought us out with unmerited pain and suffering. However we regard Him, or even if we do not recognize Him at all, He is always there, within us, within everyu thing and every person in the universe, constantly available for our help if we are willing to accept. How well we use the consciousness of God in our daily lives depends not on Him, but on us.
TODAY’S REMINDER
I have observed that those who make the best progress in the al-Anon program are those who readily accept the help of a Higher Power. Once they can do that, it is easier for them to Let Go and Let god, and their problems resolve themselves in a way that passes human understanding.
“Lord, thou hast been our dwelling place in all generations.” - Psalms
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 12 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
How great is the human need for a scapegoat, someone or something to blame for our disappointments. “If she hadn’t done that, this wouldn’t have happened.” – “Why couldn’t he have done what I expected?” – “It’s all her fault!”
I must realize that every time I feel someone has offended or injured me, at least part of my unhappiness is due to the way I reacted. Actually I am not so vulnerable to being hurt, by circumstances or the actions of other people, as I think I am. Much that happens to me, good or bad, is self-created.
TODAY’S REMINDER
If I am convinced that I am to a large extent, “the captain of my soul,” I can more readily accept the fact that I have the power to ward off misfortunes, disappointments and other troubles. Blaming others for what happens to me would keep me at a spiritual standstill.
“Nothing can work damage to me except myself; the harm that I sustain I carry about with me and never am a real sufferer except by my own fault.” – (Ralph Waldo Emerson: Essay on Compensation)
How great is the human need for a scapegoat, someone or something to blame for our disappointments. “If she hadn’t done that, this wouldn’t have happened.” – “Why couldn’t he have done what I expected?” – “It’s all her fault!”
I must realize that every time I feel someone has offended or injured me, at least part of my unhappiness is due to the way I reacted. Actually I am not so vulnerable to being hurt, by circumstances or the actions of other people, as I think I am. Much that happens to me, good or bad, is self-created.
TODAY’S REMINDER
If I am convinced that I am to a large extent, “the captain of my soul,” I can more readily accept the fact that I have the power to ward off misfortunes, disappointments and other troubles. Blaming others for what happens to me would keep me at a spiritual standstill.
“Nothing can work damage to me except myself; the harm that I sustain I carry about with me and never am a real sufferer except by my own fault.” – (Ralph Waldo Emerson: Essay on Compensation)
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 13 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
Let us imagine a person coming into Al-Anon despairing and confused by the havoc wrought by alcoholism. She finds warm friendship from people willing to share their time, thought and experience with her. She gets Al-Anon literature and studies it. Finally she learns how to achieve serenity in the midst of turmoil. Her life gets better. Much has been done for her in Al-Anon.
Has she an obligation to the group, to the fellowship, and to the newcomers who need her help? The obvious answer is Yes. The real answer is No. She is not required to pay back in kind for any of the benefits she has had. Her only obligation is to herself; she owes herself the continued growth she will derive from giving to others what she has received.
TODAY’S REMINDER
Sharing enriches my life. Even when I serve the group as an officer, or do the small chores at meetings, it is wholesome therapy. I have a need to comfort and guide the troubled newcomer, because it gives me new insight into my own still faulty attitudes.
“At no point in my life will I achieve perfection; there will never be a time when I will not need the joy and satisfaction of helping others.”
Let us imagine a person coming into Al-Anon despairing and confused by the havoc wrought by alcoholism. She finds warm friendship from people willing to share their time, thought and experience with her. She gets Al-Anon literature and studies it. Finally she learns how to achieve serenity in the midst of turmoil. Her life gets better. Much has been done for her in Al-Anon.
Has she an obligation to the group, to the fellowship, and to the newcomers who need her help? The obvious answer is Yes. The real answer is No. She is not required to pay back in kind for any of the benefits she has had. Her only obligation is to herself; she owes herself the continued growth she will derive from giving to others what she has received.
TODAY’S REMINDER
Sharing enriches my life. Even when I serve the group as an officer, or do the small chores at meetings, it is wholesome therapy. I have a need to comfort and guide the troubled newcomer, because it gives me new insight into my own still faulty attitudes.
“At no point in my life will I achieve perfection; there will never be a time when I will not need the joy and satisfaction of helping others.”
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 14 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
SPONSORSHIP: WHAT IT’S ALL ABOUT is the title of a booklet available to any member. This is a new thought to many of us. We may doubt that we’re strong enough in the program – we may think we “haven’t time to take on somebody else’s troubles.” Being a sponsor is a great adventure. It is more than that – it is a great education in human relations and in spiritual growth.
Once we start, we’re amazed to find out how much we have absorbed of the Al-Anon program. And from this personal interchange and sharing, the sponsor often gains even more than the sponsored!
TODAY’S REMINDER
It is not only the newcomer who benefits from having one particular person to look to for guidance – even the old-timer in the program may find that another member, with different and perhaps better insights, can be of immense help. As one member put it,”…answers came not from books, but from mutual caring and thinking out loud with someone you felt comfortable with.”
“I would strongly recommend sponsorship to anyone in Al-Anon. It opens a whole new area of mind and heart; it’s a big job and you have to grow in it.”
SPONSORSHIP: WHAT IT’S ALL ABOUT is the title of a booklet available to any member. This is a new thought to many of us. We may doubt that we’re strong enough in the program – we may think we “haven’t time to take on somebody else’s troubles.” Being a sponsor is a great adventure. It is more than that – it is a great education in human relations and in spiritual growth.
Once we start, we’re amazed to find out how much we have absorbed of the Al-Anon program. And from this personal interchange and sharing, the sponsor often gains even more than the sponsored!
TODAY’S REMINDER
It is not only the newcomer who benefits from having one particular person to look to for guidance – even the old-timer in the program may find that another member, with different and perhaps better insights, can be of immense help. As one member put it,”…answers came not from books, but from mutual caring and thinking out loud with someone you felt comfortable with.”
“I would strongly recommend sponsorship to anyone in Al-Anon. It opens a whole new area of mind and heart; it’s a big job and you have to grow in it.”
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 15 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
I am learning to recognize in myself any immoderate emotional reactions to things that happen or to something that is said to me. If I notice that I still squirm and agonize over past mistakes and disappointments, I will observe that and correct it. Likewise, I will guard against thoughts of dread of what may happen in the future. How can I know what’s going to be?
This awareness comes through the study of the Al-Anon program. It shows me how to overcome these handicaps by taking care of just one little day at a time.
This one day, I can easily cope with, if I have not frittered away my energies on destructive emotions, and if I do not provoke antagonism by criticisms, complaints and reproaches.
TODAY’S REMINDER
When anything happens to disturb me on this one day, I will ask myself, “Is it my problem?” – “Does it really matter so much?” – “Is it important?”
“Today I will observe how I react and what I am tempted to say or do.”
I am learning to recognize in myself any immoderate emotional reactions to things that happen or to something that is said to me. If I notice that I still squirm and agonize over past mistakes and disappointments, I will observe that and correct it. Likewise, I will guard against thoughts of dread of what may happen in the future. How can I know what’s going to be?
This awareness comes through the study of the Al-Anon program. It shows me how to overcome these handicaps by taking care of just one little day at a time.
This one day, I can easily cope with, if I have not frittered away my energies on destructive emotions, and if I do not provoke antagonism by criticisms, complaints and reproaches.
TODAY’S REMINDER
When anything happens to disturb me on this one day, I will ask myself, “Is it my problem?” – “Does it really matter so much?” – “Is it important?”
“Today I will observe how I react and what I am tempted to say or do.”
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 16 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
There are the super optimists who imagine that Al-Anon has a magic formula for curing all life's ills. A weekly hour for a meeting, they think, and all will be well.
A situation in which the lives and sanity of an entire family are at stake is not so easily solved, but the super optimist resolutely clings to the illusion that Al-Anon can fix everyting. It "fixes" nothing; that is up to us. Not in the once-a-week meeting alone, but with plenty of in-between reading, constant recall of the principles and constant use, Al-Anon does have the formula, but it is we who must use it.
TODAY’S REMINDER
Changing our whole way of thinking is a monumental task, not to be taken lightly. But many thousands of members can testify that it's the most rewarding and self-serving activity ever devised for curing sick family relationships!
"'Listen, read, think, use' says Al-Anon to those who really want a better way of living."
There are the super optimists who imagine that Al-Anon has a magic formula for curing all life's ills. A weekly hour for a meeting, they think, and all will be well.
A situation in which the lives and sanity of an entire family are at stake is not so easily solved, but the super optimist resolutely clings to the illusion that Al-Anon can fix everyting. It "fixes" nothing; that is up to us. Not in the once-a-week meeting alone, but with plenty of in-between reading, constant recall of the principles and constant use, Al-Anon does have the formula, but it is we who must use it.
TODAY’S REMINDER
Changing our whole way of thinking is a monumental task, not to be taken lightly. But many thousands of members can testify that it's the most rewarding and self-serving activity ever devised for curing sick family relationships!
"'Listen, read, think, use' says Al-Anon to those who really want a better way of living."
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 17 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
The husband of an alcoholic from an Al-Anon group in France writes to the World Service Office, “I recall our blackboard at school. The writing was often hard to read because the board had been wiped with a cloth that was loaded with chalk dust. Then we would wipe it with a wet sponge and the board would be clean and black, so we could read clearly what was written on it.
“Is it not the same with the anxieties that trouble me? If I wish to erase them from my mind, I must not use a cloth full of dusty thoughts, but ‘pass the sponge over it’ so that no trace of what was written before can jumble up the fresh inspiration – the ideas I want to see and live with.”
TODAY’S REMINDER
From every corner of the world, people in Al-Anon reach out to each other with helpful thoughts. How vividly this young Parisian husband shows us the need to erase our useless anxieties from our minds and hearts!
“I pray that I may start each new day with a clean blackboard and write upon it only what is good for me.”
The husband of an alcoholic from an Al-Anon group in France writes to the World Service Office, “I recall our blackboard at school. The writing was often hard to read because the board had been wiped with a cloth that was loaded with chalk dust. Then we would wipe it with a wet sponge and the board would be clean and black, so we could read clearly what was written on it.
“Is it not the same with the anxieties that trouble me? If I wish to erase them from my mind, I must not use a cloth full of dusty thoughts, but ‘pass the sponge over it’ so that no trace of what was written before can jumble up the fresh inspiration – the ideas I want to see and live with.”
TODAY’S REMINDER
From every corner of the world, people in Al-Anon reach out to each other with helpful thoughts. How vividly this young Parisian husband shows us the need to erase our useless anxieties from our minds and hearts!
“I pray that I may start each new day with a clean blackboard and write upon it only what is good for me.”
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 18 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
Thoughts to take to an Al-Anon meeting:
I will make sure that what I say will be helpful to someone, and not merely use the meeting as an audience for my troubles.
I will listen to everything that is said so I will ha ve some constructive ideas to take home with me and use.
I will not yield to my compulsion to go on talking after I have made my point – and what I say will have a direct relevance to the subject of the meeting.
If someone asks for advice, I will give it only in terms of Al-Anon principles, and not suggest action to be taken.
TODAY’S REMINDER
The Al-Anon meeting is essentially group therapy from which each person should derive maximum benefit. If I have a personal problem to discuss, I will talk about it to my sponsor before or after the meeting, or by telephone between meetings.
“I will not waste a single minute of that one hour of the week when we can be together to share experience, strength and hope.”
Thoughts to take to an Al-Anon meeting:
I will make sure that what I say will be helpful to someone, and not merely use the meeting as an audience for my troubles.
I will listen to everything that is said so I will ha ve some constructive ideas to take home with me and use.
I will not yield to my compulsion to go on talking after I have made my point – and what I say will have a direct relevance to the subject of the meeting.
If someone asks for advice, I will give it only in terms of Al-Anon principles, and not suggest action to be taken.
TODAY’S REMINDER
The Al-Anon meeting is essentially group therapy from which each person should derive maximum benefit. If I have a personal problem to discuss, I will talk about it to my sponsor before or after the meeting, or by telephone between meetings.
“I will not waste a single minute of that one hour of the week when we can be together to share experience, strength and hope.”
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 19 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
There are 168 hours in each week. Those who come to Al-Anon for help have many of those hours filled with disturbing and even painful experience; uncertainty, unfilled needs and even violence. There are ways to overcome much of this distress, and Al-Anon offers us one way.
Isn’t it worth one little hour out of 168 to come to an Al-Anon meeting? Isn’t it worth ten minutes a day for reading the Al-Anon books that tell us what we can do to help ourselves, and perhaps half an hour to give a lift to another person in trouble?
TODAY’S REMINDER
It takes so little time out of the week to learn how Al-Anon applies to me and my chaotic life, that the changes I can bring about seem like miracles. Living the Al-Anon way is an EVERY day program, and the more thought I give to it, the greater my rewards will be – in contentment, fulfillment and constant spiritual growth.
“Every minute I use in thinking and using the Al-Anon program makes all the hours of my week more livable.”
There are 168 hours in each week. Those who come to Al-Anon for help have many of those hours filled with disturbing and even painful experience; uncertainty, unfilled needs and even violence. There are ways to overcome much of this distress, and Al-Anon offers us one way.
Isn’t it worth one little hour out of 168 to come to an Al-Anon meeting? Isn’t it worth ten minutes a day for reading the Al-Anon books that tell us what we can do to help ourselves, and perhaps half an hour to give a lift to another person in trouble?
TODAY’S REMINDER
It takes so little time out of the week to learn how Al-Anon applies to me and my chaotic life, that the changes I can bring about seem like miracles. Living the Al-Anon way is an EVERY day program, and the more thought I give to it, the greater my rewards will be – in contentment, fulfillment and constant spiritual growth.
“Every minute I use in thinking and using the Al-Anon program makes all the hours of my week more livable.”
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 20 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
Al-Anon gives me a priceless opportunity to do something for others. But let me now overlook the fact that helping someone else gives me more than I give. (Note from Meredith – Like typing the ODAT’s does for me ) I have the satisfaction of lightening another’s burdens. I can clear up misconceptions about the program that will help my friend make greater strides in setting her life in order. This in itself would be ample reward for me. But I also have the self-helping experience of clarifying my thoughts and seeing my own problems in a new light.
TODAY’S REMINDER
No one in our fellowship is under obligation to anyone else. Let me not adorn myself with a halo for a good deed, for in doing it I have done more for myself than for the person I tried to help. The more light we generate for others, the better we can see ourselves.
Even a word spoken or written in a far-off land may reach me and throw new light on a perplexity of my own.
“How far that little candle throws his beams. So shines a good deed in a naughty world.” – William Shakespeare from THE MERCHANT of VENICE
Al-Anon gives me a priceless opportunity to do something for others. But let me now overlook the fact that helping someone else gives me more than I give. (Note from Meredith – Like typing the ODAT’s does for me ) I have the satisfaction of lightening another’s burdens. I can clear up misconceptions about the program that will help my friend make greater strides in setting her life in order. This in itself would be ample reward for me. But I also have the self-helping experience of clarifying my thoughts and seeing my own problems in a new light.
TODAY’S REMINDER
No one in our fellowship is under obligation to anyone else. Let me not adorn myself with a halo for a good deed, for in doing it I have done more for myself than for the person I tried to help. The more light we generate for others, the better we can see ourselves.
Even a word spoken or written in a far-off land may reach me and throw new light on a perplexity of my own.
“How far that little candle throws his beams. So shines a good deed in a naughty world.” – William Shakespeare from THE MERCHANT of VENICE
Present
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: "Happy Rock" (Gladstone) Oregon
Posts: 1,252
December 21 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
Heard at a meeting, “I brought my problems to Al-Anon, only to learn that I was expected to solve them myself. Al-Anon would provide the light to make it possible.
“This was sharply brought home to me at my second meeting. I told my horror story and ended my recital with a despairing, ‘What shall I do?’
“One member spoke up, ‘Do the dishes! Take a walk! Read a book! Start somewhere to unhook your mind from confusions, but don’t do anything about your problems until you can see them more clearly. You’ll change your way of thinking about them and the solutions will come.’
“This, to me, is the Al-Anon program in a nutshell! It kept me so busy that I had no time to wallow in misery any longer.”
TODAY’S REMINDER
I will not try to make important decisions until I have freed my mind from resentment, self-pity and hopelessness. Then I will be ready.
“With the serenity I find in Al-Anon many of my difficulties solve themselves without my help.”
Heard at a meeting, “I brought my problems to Al-Anon, only to learn that I was expected to solve them myself. Al-Anon would provide the light to make it possible.
“This was sharply brought home to me at my second meeting. I told my horror story and ended my recital with a despairing, ‘What shall I do?’
“One member spoke up, ‘Do the dishes! Take a walk! Read a book! Start somewhere to unhook your mind from confusions, but don’t do anything about your problems until you can see them more clearly. You’ll change your way of thinking about them and the solutions will come.’
“This, to me, is the Al-Anon program in a nutshell! It kept me so busy that I had no time to wallow in misery any longer.”
TODAY’S REMINDER
I will not try to make important decisions until I have freed my mind from resentment, self-pity and hopelessness. Then I will be ready.
“With the serenity I find in Al-Anon many of my difficulties solve themselves without my help.”
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