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So what's next? Another update

Old 09-24-2007, 08:02 PM
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Praying for you and the children and your daughter too...that somehow it will sink in and she will want recovery and her life back. I'm so sorry things are so hectic and I pray your get custody of the kids. God bless you. Hugs
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Old 09-24-2007, 10:05 PM
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Ok we go to court tomorrow morning. As for the baby she is still in the hospital going through withdrawal. Talk to ABF 's mom today she said he told her they had cut back a lot, but it that they couldn't just stop all at once cause it made them to sick. Well that poor little baby is sick through no fault of her own she is going through it. AD was wimping about not have her kids. AD says she done with not going to use again, so I ask why if it's that easy for you, did you use when you were pregnant...her answer was I didn't think they'd drug test me. Which tells me she is a true addict cause she won't admit she needs help. She said she might as well get a job that works lots of over time cause she didn't have her kids to take care of, well gee should of thought of that before you pumped your baby full of dope. Her plan is to get a job, get married get a place to live, an pass a few drug tests then she thinks they will give the kids back to her.
When I put her son to bed tonight he looked so sweet an innocent it made me want to go smack the crap out of his parents.
Got to try an get some sleep.
This whole thing makes me scares me an makes me sick at the same time.
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Old 09-24-2007, 11:40 PM
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I know Lost. Try not to drive yourself crazy making sense out of senseless.
I am so so sorry for your little AvaGail.
Sending my prayers that God heals her
quickly.
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Old 09-25-2007, 02:55 AM
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This thread really touches my heart. How blessed these children are to have a wonderful loving grandparent like you. I'm saying special prayers for all of you, including your daughter.

Hugs
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Old 09-25-2007, 08:57 AM
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Lost,
Bless little Gracie's heart for having to enter this world with the pain of addiction.
Bless your heart for being the kind and loving grandma that you are. Those babies are blessed to have you.

Someday your AD will see the light. Right now she cannot take care of them and I know you don't want her to. Prayers that she can pull her life together and be a mom to those babies.

Hugs to you and your family............Lo
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Old 09-26-2007, 06:12 AM
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Well they had the court hearing the judge agreed the 2 kids have been placed with us. We then an talk to a lawyer an he said we should file for permanent guardianship. Says the way things are now that CS still as control an are the kids guardians. If we get permanent guardianship then if AD an ABF mess up an don't do what CS says, they won't put them up for adoption or anything since there would already be a permanent guardianship in place. So we are thinking of doing that it would make me feel better cause I'm not sure the parents will be able to follow all the steps that need to be done to get them back.
As for poor little Avigail Grace ( I don't like that first name)she is still going through withdrawal an know word on when she gets to come home.
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Old 09-26-2007, 07:12 AM
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Thank your lucky stars!! There is someone working on the side of the grandparents..at least in your state!! When my AD had her little girl she had a lot of after birth complications ....she was sent home with the baby but I had to rush her back to the emergency room when she had a seizure (sp?) driving down the interstate and wrecked into the guardrail. It wasn't until the doctor pulled her records did he reveal that the tox screening taking at the birth of my grandaughter was possitive for drugs did I realize she had been doing them while she was pregnant. Anyhow, her test showed dirty and they still allowed her to come home with the baby!! I am so glad in your case the state stepped up and considered what was best for these two little ones!! I hope Grace is doing well and will be home with you soon. Please keep us updated!!

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Old 09-26-2007, 07:18 AM
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My sister had 3 kids when she finally went for help, it took over a year of rehab, continued support, drug testing and most important "A willingness to stay clean" before she got her kids back. 2 of her kids she had she remained clean all during the pregnancies, after her 3rd she left the hospital to go get high. I never understood that. Today she is 5 years clean/sober and is probably in a better place than she was long before the drugs, she homeschool's the 3 oldest kids and also has a 4th now. (2 years old)
So recovery is possible and it is very possible that your daughter will one day be the mother those kids need. Prayers and hugs!
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Old 09-26-2007, 07:04 PM
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((lostparent))
Don't quite know what to say, except I am so proud of you. When I look at that picture of that sweet little infant face, it really shows what a horrible disease addiction is. My prayers are with your whole family, and that your daughter finds her way. Sounds like you are the glue holding it all together, don't forget to take care of you. Your grandchild is very beautiful, and so lucky to have you.
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Old 09-26-2007, 07:51 PM
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Well AD had to get a drug test today an she said she won't pass it. Said she took some kind of pain pill last night to help her through. I told her she needs to lock her self in a room for 3 or 4 days or go to detox an just get the withdrawals over with, baby Grace had to suffer through it an she didn't have a choice in the matter. Told her to tell case worker she needs help least then they would know she was trying, seems that would be better than failing drug test or getting busted with drugs again. She sounded like she might do it, but then later said she couldn't cause it cost to much. Seems to me CS would have away to help her get treatment since it's one of the requierments for getting kids back
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Old 09-26-2007, 07:52 PM
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Doing well thanks for telling me about your sister, maybe there is some hope for my AD yet.
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Old 09-26-2007, 09:21 PM
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lost,
I'm sure happy the custody went well, you sure are a good, caring, loving grandmom...

I'm praying for your daughter.....
there's always hope.....
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Old 09-27-2007, 09:12 AM
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Lost,
So glad baby Gracie will have a safe and loving enviornment.

Blessings on you and your family..........Lo
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Old 09-27-2007, 09:45 AM
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Lost - so glad the kids can stay with you.

I know each state is different but when my stepmom got guardianship of my niece, they did it on a 2-year basis. After a while, they gave us "full" guardianship until she is 18.

My niece's dad is an addict and constantly in trouble. He recently made allegations against my family but when CPS came and heard OUR version, she has been awesome. I've been trying to get my stepmom to put my niece in counselling for years (she has major anger issues). Turns out the CPS worker is a licensed counselor and is coming to our house once a week to talk to my niece. I am hoping that eventually niece will be able to go to her office and talk without my stepmom around. But for now, my stepmom says B (niece) has really opened up and I think the CPS worker is doing it here so she can build up trust with B by having family around.

So I've been pleasantly surprised that CPS is doing everything possible to help B. Her dad recently applied for custody (what a joke) and they told him he might as well give it up because "there's not a snowball's chance in hell you will ever get her".

So I'm going to pray that you, too, are blessed with caseworkers that have the children's best interest at heart. It's a good start that they are letting the kids stay with you.

My prayers are going out to you, the kids, and your AD.

Amy
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Old 09-27-2007, 10:47 AM
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Oh Lost... what a path they are on, eh?

Thank goodness those babies have you, and thank you for being there for them. I am glad you are going for permanent custody... if your AD gets clean, you can always address that issue later. For today, what is good for the kiddos is the right thing to do.

I am sorry you have to carry this burden, but what I can see looking back, is that every time I thought *I* knew my kids' "bottom" they proved to me that addiction could take them lower.

I wish you could get out to some meetings -they help me realize... really realize... that I am not walking this path alone. They give me hope, too, as I meet others who have been through worse than me and SEE their kids get better - when no one else ever thought they could.

I wish you the best... and send prayers for the little ones, too.

(((Hugs)))
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Old 09-27-2007, 11:10 AM
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Told ya I'd win the bet!!! Glad things are going well, Grace will be ok. I feel for her when she hits the teen years, w/ this already hanging over her head! You are a great grandma, I don't know if I could do it!!!! Prayers for your daughter, can't believe these types of things.
susan:
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Old 09-27-2007, 11:18 AM
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You are a great grandma!!! Thank god for you. Those kids are lucky to have you. Prayers for your daughter and Baby Grace.
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Old 09-27-2007, 02:58 PM
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Hi Lost...

I'm so glad it worked out. Be sure and take some
time out for you even if it's just to take a walk.
CS and the judge will do everything they can to
help your daughter get clean and get the kids back-if that's what she wants. When she goes to court and the test is dirty they will ask her if she needs/wants help and if she says YES-they will
get the ball rolling and put her in rehab-at no
cost.

Hugs!
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Old 09-27-2007, 07:26 PM
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Well there's another problem an I really don't think I can or know if I should help. Seems the case worker went to AD's PO an told him what was going on even gave him copy's of her failed drug test. So he has violated her, an in this county that's means she will sit in jail for 2 to 3 months before she gets a hearing. Which means she won't make court dates in other state an they will put a warrant out for her. CS had already told her she has to go some kind of rehab am she for the first time in her life was asking for it. Yesterday an today she kept saying she wanted them to hurry an get her started or put her in detox or something. She has been an is willing to at least try an do everything CS says.
So now this happens an she will sit in jail with no help at all. PO told her to turn herself in an bond out the next day,I don't if I can or even if I should post her bail.
Her son will miss seeing her an he is having enough to deal with the way it is..I just really don't know what if any thing I should do.
Aas for baby Grace they said her bp was going up so they gave her Phenabarbatol an said she will have to stay in the hospital a few more days.
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Old 09-27-2007, 07:32 PM
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Thanks for keeping us updated. My heart goes out to you.

(((lostparent)))
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