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She needs to get better too

Old 02-25-2002, 04:47 AM
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Post She needs to get better too

Hi, I am an alcoholic and posting on other sites. I have started reading your postings to better understand what my alcoholism has done to my wife and others. I read with great intrest an article Pernell wrote on the NA site ( Clancy, addictive personality )
It opened my eyes that I am not the only one that is ill. I am going to work very hard and a day at a time get better. I sat down with her this weekend and as hard as it was I admited all the lies about drinking and money. I want us both to get better and felt starting on a foundation of truth would be best. She and so many others have dealt with Don's problems for so long that even though she dosen't drink I can see some of my alcoholic behavior in her. If that makes sense. I mentioned above that I want, well she is right when she said life isn't always about what I want. She agreed to read some of your postings this weekend. I have this desire to tell you some of her feelings but, I won't. If she decides to go on the board that is her decision. I have already told her that if she goes on the Alonon board I will not go on unless she wants me to read something. I wish you all well. Don W
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Old 02-25-2002, 05:33 AM
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Hey Don, I can relate to your wife so well, because I know I need to get well too, My A is my boyfriend and father to our 5 year old little girl. We have been together 7 years this april. Weve split 3 times and just recently are giving things a go again, he still drinks, and I know I have to get help myself, I went to my first meeting last week, it really helped.

Has she ever gone to any meetings? Or let her read some things here, it will really help. Just wanted to offer some friendly words, take care and keep posting. bonbon
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Old 02-25-2002, 06:29 AM
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Hi bonbon, Thanks for your imput. I was a little concerned about posting here. I have been hurt, and sadly I have hurt. I understand that many on this board are being hurt by alcoholism, and may feel a need to strike back. I am looking for a healing process that is complete and not just about me. I don't have the answers but, I have many of the same questions that those affected have, why do I, how could I etc. I have asked my wife to understand for many years about my alcoholism. It is my turn to understand the affects on her. For the first time in 14 years I sat down and listened about problems in her childhood. In the past I was only concerned about mine. Don W
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