Help from Men about Relationships

Old 03-02-2011, 03:03 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by wonderingincda View Post
Cyranoak...I hope that you find peace. I have read some of your other posts, and may I respectfully request that you really THINK before you reply.

I was asking for advice, not rudeness. You could only hope to have a friend like myself, because whether my friends are male or female they are treated the same and I expect the same in return. Whether it be good or not so good.

I reckon every one of us saw or sees a little bit of us in you, wonderingincda. There's a thread in here somewhere asking what we would have done differently if we knew what we know now. Some of us would have slapped the dogshit out of ourselves for not listening to ourselves.

So I can understand the frustration here but there's a massive difference. You guys aren't even dating and you're asking us for advice about how to control an old alcoholic boyfriend who's now seeing someone else. We see some of these posts on a daily basis and we try our best to answer them best we can.

Please keep in mind that some of us are giving advice from a point of extreme pain. We are married to the alcoholic. We have kids with them. They get beat. We get beat. We are financially troubled, destroyed, wrecked, ruined and trying to recover from it. When we see people falling down the same hole we fell into, some of us are going to shout. We can only hope others will listen. So in response to you, and not in defense of cyranoak, I'll ask you to take it easy. We're only here to help each other and we all have a different style.
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Old 03-02-2011, 05:31 PM
  # 22 (permalink)  
Join Date: Nov 2010
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Nothing to fear

After yet another talking to from Desert Eyes, and as always he is right, I'm going to throttle back yet again and try to amp up my warm and fuzzy a little more. I failed, this time, to realize new people need to be treated differently, and I really do feel bad about my second post on this thread (which he sent to the place bad posts go to die). I have offered Wondering a real apology, and I hope she accepts it.

That said, having read many of your posts Jamaica, it's highly unlikely I'll ever feel compelled to be brutally honest with you. You seem very self aware, and you can probably teach me a lot more than I could ever teach you.

Take what you want and leave the rest.


Originally Posted by jamaicamecrazy View Post
I live in fear that one day Cyranoak will post a brutally honest reply to one of my posts. I know it will probably be the kick in the a** I need to hear. Some people send hugs and support that envelope us and give us strength to walk away. Others give us the slap in the face we need to snap out of it. The delivery is different but the message and the intent is the same. Save Yourself, Focus on you, You can't fix them. Don't drive yourself crazy trying to save them if they don't want to be saved.
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Old 03-03-2011, 07:53 PM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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Cyranoak...I too apologize. Brutal honesty is something I value. Thank you!!! (I am unable to send you a private message as I am new here, but thank you very much for yours.)

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