naive

ok, it's sounding like a long skirt, with boots?

that leaves the top. we need a little sex appeal...i love this top pictured here with the black bra showing just a wee bit...kinda cheeky ..plus, i love the ruffle too and the v-neck...just a bit sexy and would work over a long skirt with your black boots...

white Forever21 dress - brown sweater - brown Jones New York belt - black Urban - Lori Meyers - badley's blog - Casual, Everyday in the Fall - Chictopia

transformyself

oooo naive. you are BAD girl! I've got a lovely black bra to peek out from that kind of low cut shirt, too.

He's emailed me already today, saying

Thanks again for inviting me to this Transform. As for the question of it being fun, there is no doubt. One way or another, we'll make it be.

Geez. I do feel like a school girl..

Live

Folks, I skipped several posts but I gotta tell ya...I go about this completely differently and it really has always worked exceedingly well for me!
My sis calls me a man magnet if that works for qualifications.

I REFUSE to do the typical thing and dress us for first dates.
I dress down...so your jeans and turtlenecks, your every day wear is what I would do.

I make sure they are not looking at me as a sex object and get interested in knowing me.
Then I surpise them later off and on dressed up in ways they have never seen me before.
It really gets them, I am telling you!
and so...the getting to know me gets better and better.

make sense?

In the beginning it is all about they need to impress me.

transformyself

Thanks Live- I feel like we've already gone through that part in many ways. Established his "wanting" me because he sought me out through email only, after seeing my writing, for this expert panel. We;ve been communicating through email only for awhile.

Then, when we met at that party--we were both attracted to each other and also enthralled with conversation. He's pursuing all right.

The getting to know me gets better and better too!

Lotus2009

What a fun thread

I love all the fashion suggestions you received, Transformie... reminded me that I need new clothes BAADLY ... if I had the money and time, I'd go shopping with you

But I'm sure your date will be happy with whatever you wear! Hope you have LOTS of fun!!!!

naive

hey, i'm just waiting to bust out. watch this space.

a year and a half solo? hmmm.

you have a good time on your date, transformie. and let us know how it goes!!!!

transformyself

I have a black (yes I know) shirt that is very thin and sexy with a knitted top over it I may wear. I do have a long clingy black skirt with long slits up the side too. Could wear that with tights, my black clunky boots and a simple, flowing shirt.

Where is my wardrobe helper?! Naive, why are you so far away?!?

I"m starting to get pretty worried.
Why did I invite him? I have to give a presentation to this group. I don't know what to wear. I'm fat as hell and can't take it anymore.

Also, I think I'm a bit obsessive. I've already got us married in my mind at times for crying out sakes loud! Thinking what a perfect match we are, when in reality, I barely know this man. Geez Louise. I'm getting frustrated with myself. Need to: do laundry, grocery shop, sort out what to wear tomorrow, wash the floors and write my damn speech but instead I'm thinking about him.

I told a business associate about him today and she flipped! She said he's one of the most elegible bachelor around and no she knows has been able to get their hands on him

I have a real problem with women lately who are jealous of the things I do. My friends that is. One friend was mad that I'm on this panel, said, "I begged him to let me be on that panel, why did he call you?"

I don't subscribe to the scarcity principal, hell if someone else is getting props or attention or a job or whatever I think it's because they're awesome, not that I wish it were happening to me! It doesn't mean there isn't more attention or work or food or love for me! I go and make that happen. Make your life amazing, don't be angry when others are happy!

The real fun will be next Friday, when I'm a panelist at the statewide event his paper is sponsoring. The ad is in the paper today and it looks like a blast. Tons of people, panel members who are the best in the industry.

This is how we hooked up, he emailed me, asked if I wanted to be a panelist. Now that I know my friend

Ah. Reality is, my floors won't wash themselves, even if I leave them to their HP...

HealingWillCome

Transform! I wanna take a deep breath for you...

Makes me think of the kids' show Blue's Clues when my girls were little. I can hear Steve, the host, saying: Stop. Breathe. Think.

And my own two cents: But Don't Overthink. Just enjoy!!!

You will look beautiful no matter what you decide to wear. Your speech will be great. Your floors will be shiny and your laundry will get done. And the jealous women will just have to deal with it. Their problem, not yours! Just have fun!!! Enjoy the moment and don't worry about planning your future with Mr. Tall McDreamy Dude...let HP worry about that...you just do your job, whatever is right, at the moment, in the here and now!

Breathe.... Smile.... Enjoy.... Rinse.... Repeat....

naive

ok, transformie, best to try on a couple of outfits today and make your decision early, so that you don't fret about it at the last minute. i'm sure you'll look fabulous!

i would go for sexy, casual, feminine...i'm not a big fan of the modified hippy look unless i'm going to a bonfire at the beach...

the thin black top sounds very good...i like sheer as long as you have a something sexy underneath...a nice black camisole with thin straps always works...and a big no to bra then covered by camisole...we're not going to war, we're going on a date...oh sorry, i mean YOU're going on a date...ha ha

(as for the xtra weight, all i can say is get a good juicer and that's that taken care of.)

missphit

whatever you decide, I know you'll look great, be great and have a wonderful time!! enjoy and smile!! you deserve all this excitement. Stay in the now and take good care!! it is thrilling to read all these posts. Can't wait to hear a full report!!
I have no fashion advice, since i like to funk things up and just enjoy whatever cloth i decide to embellish myself with....shoes, beads, skirts, tights....it's all about reflecting on the outside how i feel on the inside! I'm no help at all!! I know you'll do just fine! take a photo, if you can. I'd love to see.....i'm just saying!! so excited for you!!! YOU GO GIRL!!!

transformyself

Thanks you guys, I know I'm being a big baby.

I woke up overwhelmed with all the work I have to do today-keep moving crap out of the old house, get back to yoga (that changes the way my body looks after one class and I went yesterday and feel so much better about being fat) keep praying for Creator to give me the right words in my presentation tonight.

But here you are. Supportive, kind, reminding me of how strong I am. Thank you.

coyote21

I haven't given any presentations lately, but every time I've had a difficult situation to navigate, with axw, xmil, landlord etc., if I can remember to pray for the right words and ask HP to speak through me, it's worked out just as it is supposed to.

I'm pretty sure you'll do fine tonight. Have a ball.

Thanks and God bless us all,
Coyote

P.S. Can you feel all the love for you that's generated in this thread? Just observing from the side lines is making ME feel good!

transformyself

I CAN Yo, I totally can.

It's so humbling. I'm humbled a lot lately.

transformyself

AND I'm so excited about developing a friendship with this man. Today I feel confident in just being myself and establishing a friendship. We are so similar in so many ways

We've been on the phone four times today discussing:

a potential article to work on together (he's way smarter and more professional than I am which I love-I need a mentor to learn from),
what to wear (he's having a clothes crisis too)
and he sounds as excited as I am to go on this date.

The article we're working on about more SWAT raids in our area. A young man, 19, was sleeping in his bed when they came in the house and the officers shot his dog that was sleeping behind him. The father is a retired police officer and reached out to me for help because he is being shut out by the masochistic ***** who did this. Oh, and they were jumping on pogo sticks in the living room after they shot his dog too.

For me this is enough to start working on an article. For Editor, it's a starting point. He is much more professional, and presents more balanced journalism than I do. He seems so fair. So stable and considerate. So tall..

This is why I work to end the drug war. One of the many reasons.

I'm ready to jump in and get working but Tall Editor is waiting, gathering more information, ensuring we have the best possible angle and being very strategic. Careful.

If what my business associate told me is true, this man doesn't date. His wife died several years ago, so I think he's really enjoying this too, at least he says he is.

We shift from very serious while working to giggling when talking about our date tonight. When we were sorting out when to meet up with this raid victims family, I said, "well we could do that this afternoon, but I have a hot date," and he giggled. I mean, like a teenager. At 54.

I love that he's older than I am. I told him I could drive and he politely insisted that he drive. I think that's a generation thing and in some ways it's a relief to let someone else take over. Even if it's just driving.

Back to taking care of two wrestling monkeys in the living room, grocery shopping and figuring out what the hell to wear. Not to mention what the hell I'm going to SAY at this event tonight..

Thank you everyone!

HealingWillCome

Me too.

Have fun tonight, Transform! I'm sending up some prayers for you right now...

TakingCharge999

I don't subscribe to the scarcity principal, hell if someone else is getting props or attention or a job or whatever I think it's because they're awesome, not that I wish it were happening to me!

That is your self esteem talking right there, as my therapist says. Good for you!!

Live thanks for the food for thought! I liked your post! but also.. the kind of people that one wants to be with.. are those that already like you regardless of whatever right.. that can see you in your pijamas or dressed up or with the same old jeans and are more driven by your personality than whatever you are wearing... perhaps that was your point? anyway thanks for your perspective, it has helped me now that I may start "going out" as well...

Transformie you are going to be fine! let us know how it went! and the gentleman should drive, glad you are taking a break from that at least. He sounds like a nice person and a positive motivation for you. It is funny he has a clothing crisis too! and you had a dance company?? that's so cool!!


Glad you did yoga, I am doing some yoga today too, to accept my body as it is now and thank it for all it does and has endured meanwhile I will be reading my IT book. What a wild night for me

trapeze

Transform - just seeing the title of this thread, knowing it is yours, made me smile. I can't say I recall the specifics of your situation, but I recall that you have been working hardd to claim your happiness.

Good for you. Enjoy.

naive

what! a man that can go out for an evening and actually drive home at the end of it?

pray tell us more of such man...i have heard ancient legends of such men...ah...i remember now...legend goes that they also wear clean socks that they washed themselves and their feet don't stink...they do not smell of beer...they smell of musky cologne...ah yes, i am recalling, they have plenty of gasoline in their cars too..tell us, sister transformie, does such man exist? is he not only ancient folklore?

transformyself

Naive-I've heard of such men myself but never believed it. But my sister has a song, "I believe in love," and the more I love myself, the more those kinds of folks show up.

Like you for instance.

TakingCharge999

what! a man that can go out for an evening and actually drive home at the end of it?