I dumped it out
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 27
I dumped it out
I'm not looking for a pat on the back or anything of the sort. I'm just saying for the first time in forever I've poured out my beer because I'm sick of the person it's making me. I'm being secretive and deceitful and awful. The only reason i drink now is to help with anxiety but in reality it just makes things worse. I've known it was a problem for a long while. I think security in having some alcohol is huge with me.
It's got to stop because it's interfering with my life and making me irresponsible. I hate it. It causes so much stress. It may take it away for a bit but it comes back in abundance.
I don't want it anymore, and at least for tonight, i said no. I don't want that.
I wish people would understand how much i don't want this on my life and yet how it keeps sneaking its way in. I just wish non alcoholics understood a little more.
All i can do is try to be a survivor so i can help.
It's got to stop because it's interfering with my life and making me irresponsible. I hate it. It causes so much stress. It may take it away for a bit but it comes back in abundance.
I don't want it anymore, and at least for tonight, i said no. I don't want that.
I wish people would understand how much i don't want this on my life and yet how it keeps sneaking its way in. I just wish non alcoholics understood a little more.
All i can do is try to be a survivor so i can help.
Sober Soldier
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 1,911
We understand genesuu
Good for you in pouring it out and realizing that alcohol does not solve anything. It merely blinds you to the truth, which is that you have an innate ability to overcome life's obstacles.
Stay focused and decide what you need to do to beat this. We have your back.
More power to you!
Good for you in pouring it out and realizing that alcohol does not solve anything. It merely blinds you to the truth, which is that you have an innate ability to overcome life's obstacles.
Stay focused and decide what you need to do to beat this. We have your back.
More power to you!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: omaha Ne
Posts: 25
I know what you mean... I wish that they could live one day in our body and our minds just so they can have a glimpse of what we go through. It's like they think that we just woke up one day and decided that this is what we wanted. What child imagines their future to be like this? They think we make the decision because we like it. It is a disease! A horrible one at that. But we can treat it if we want. Its like a diabetic, if they really want to see improvement, they follow the docs orders, but its easier said then done. You can do it!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
For me I needed to make some tough decisions on the activities I got involved in and the people I hung out with when I got Sober, because as you say alcohol seemed to slip back in, but I realised I don't need to go to some places and I don't have to meet some people.
We have the control to protect our own Sobriety!! Keep pushing through!!
We have the control to protect our own Sobriety!! Keep pushing through!!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 1,222
"At least for tonight"..???
If you are to lead a healthy and productive life you need to never drink again. AA will teach you one day at a time... But let's be clear, it's one day at a time, in a row, forever. Dee is asking you about your recovery plan because he knows full well that it will take planning, total commitment and all your resolve to stay sober. Are you ready for that? There is a big, wonderful world waiting for you if you are.
Read the site, there are some horrible posts today. That's your alternative. Please, read as much as you can and learn what it will take to stay sober.
If you are to lead a healthy and productive life you need to never drink again. AA will teach you one day at a time... But let's be clear, it's one day at a time, in a row, forever. Dee is asking you about your recovery plan because he knows full well that it will take planning, total commitment and all your resolve to stay sober. Are you ready for that? There is a big, wonderful world waiting for you if you are.
Read the site, there are some horrible posts today. That's your alternative. Please, read as much as you can and learn what it will take to stay sober.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Washington, MO
Posts: 2,306
The implied "plan" that this site is dotted with is probably what keeps me here. Heard at a meeting "It wasn't my Drunk bottoms that got me sober--it was the bottoms I had while just not drinking". I believe that having gone through some stuff recently and realize the tough choices have to be made w/out option C (eff-it, I'm outta here). I can't go anywhere with option C on deck so I gotta really look at what I'm wanting to run from and plan accordingly. You can do it if I can.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 27
I have a new job starting February. I absolutely do not want alcohol to ruin it. I'm tired of thinking about alcohol constantly. No amount is ever enough. All i want to do is let in bed and sleep all the time.
I was sober for 3 months from November to February last year with the help of AA. Had some really emotional times and personal struggles which I allowed to cause a relapse. I've had few sober days since.
I no longer drink hard liquor but i do drink beer. I quit for 3 days a few weeks ago on willpower alone but the AV crept up and said 'jeez, just have a beer ,it won't hurt anything' ... since then it's just more of the same. I won't buy any today. That is the start.
I'm considering going back to meetings even though I'm kind of against AA from the experiences I've had. Seemed like a lot of really psychotic, self absorbed people all trying to tell each other what to do. I may have been very stubborn and not open minded at the time though. For a whole i did feel a fellowship and that helped.
I also need to go see a therapist or psychiatrist to see about this anxiety. I know i have a lot i need to work through. Emotional trauma.
I'm single and not around anyone else who drinks, but it's my go to for relaxing at the end of the day. Unfortunately it always leaks into the afternoons and, when it gets bad, mornings too. I'd drink all day and sleep if I were allowed to. I just don't want to be around anyone.
Reading books, watching documentaries and such helped me bide my time in the past without drinking.
I don't currently have insurance, that's why I'm not scheduling therapy right this second. I will continue to check in here for support in the meantime. Day 1 is absolutely the hardest. After that, it gets much easier but I can't drop my guard again.
I was sober for 3 months from November to February last year with the help of AA. Had some really emotional times and personal struggles which I allowed to cause a relapse. I've had few sober days since.
I no longer drink hard liquor but i do drink beer. I quit for 3 days a few weeks ago on willpower alone but the AV crept up and said 'jeez, just have a beer ,it won't hurt anything' ... since then it's just more of the same. I won't buy any today. That is the start.
I'm considering going back to meetings even though I'm kind of against AA from the experiences I've had. Seemed like a lot of really psychotic, self absorbed people all trying to tell each other what to do. I may have been very stubborn and not open minded at the time though. For a whole i did feel a fellowship and that helped.
I also need to go see a therapist or psychiatrist to see about this anxiety. I know i have a lot i need to work through. Emotional trauma.
I'm single and not around anyone else who drinks, but it's my go to for relaxing at the end of the day. Unfortunately it always leaks into the afternoons and, when it gets bad, mornings too. I'd drink all day and sleep if I were allowed to. I just don't want to be around anyone.
Reading books, watching documentaries and such helped me bide my time in the past without drinking.
I don't currently have insurance, that's why I'm not scheduling therapy right this second. I will continue to check in here for support in the meantime. Day 1 is absolutely the hardest. After that, it gets much easier but I can't drop my guard again.
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
Read this see if it helps bud you can print it off its very useful http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-recovery.html
Sobriety saved my life & gave me so much
if you ever need to talk chat vent send a pm bud
Sobriety saved my life & gave me so much
if you ever need to talk chat vent send a pm bud
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