Robby's Thread II
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Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Dallas, Texas
Posts: 2,459
Originally Posted by haennie 
Hi Robby, and everyone! Here, and again.
I have a story
I put in my profile here that I am interested in animals... Well, this "interest" now led me into a problem that I'll have to solve, and not only for myself.
I met someone in the conference I attended this week, who breeds Siamese cats, and she has a new litter just now. I wrote about my love of Siamese cats here on SR before... Anyhow, she was a local and I went to see the cats ~a week ago. Me and my psychiatrist friend from NYC I ended up lying on the floor playing with the cats.
And there is this kitty who keeps coming to me... even when his mother grabs him and takes him back to their nest (it's a wonderful large room actually, my new cat breeder friend really has everything possible for the animals). We let this kitty rest on my belly, for an hour or so. There were other people coming in from the conference (it was sort of a party), and I just lay there on the carpet with the kitten.
My psychiatrist friend urged me later to go back another time to play with the cats, and we did. I sit down on the floor, and this same kitty comes to me almost immediately, even though the mommy cat was nursing them. So, same scene yesterday, me and this little thing resting on me.
Kitties are ~3 week old and it will be a few more weeks to wean them safely. My friend and I will travel more this weekend, but he tells me/us to try to figure out all the complications necessary to transport a cat from Asia to America, and probably everywhere else...
Oh my..., and we'll see.
Btw
I have a story
I put in my profile here that I am interested in animals... Well, this "interest" now led me into a problem that I'll have to solve, and not only for myself. I met someone in the conference I attended this week, who breeds Siamese cats, and she has a new litter just now. I wrote about my love of Siamese cats here on SR before... Anyhow, she was a local and I went to see the cats ~a week ago. Me and my psychiatrist friend from NYC
I ended up lying on the floor playing with the cats.And there is this kitty who keeps coming to me... even when his mother grabs him and takes him back to their nest (it's a wonderful large room actually, my new cat breeder friend really has everything possible for the animals). We let this kitty rest on my belly, for an hour or so. There were other people coming in from the conference (it was sort of a party), and I just lay there on the carpet with the kitten.
My psychiatrist friend urged me later to go back another time to play with the cats, and we did. I sit down on the floor, and this same kitty comes to me almost immediately, even though the mommy cat was nursing them. So, same scene yesterday, me and this little thing resting on me.
Kitties are ~3 week old and it will be a few more weeks to wean them safely. My friend and I will travel more this weekend, but he tells me/us to try to figure out all the complications necessary to transport a cat from Asia to America, and probably everywhere else...
Oh my..., and we'll see.
Btw
Adventures In SpaceTime
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,827
Originally Posted by dwtbd
We had a crash course on IV pumps and the like when our daughter was born and spent the first few weeks of her life in a neonatal intensive care unit. She's 23 now, can't believe how fast that time passed and at the same time how long ago it seems.
We were unaware of her birth defects during my wife's pregnancy. Our local hospital sent us immediately to CHOP and the beginning of quite a journey. She has spina bifida and other complications, the doctors' prognosis about her survivability was rather realistic and grim. In retrospect I see they were teaching us how to care for immediate comfort and didn't expect her to make it. They released us when she stabized and basically wished us well.
I remember considerable talk of pic line /g-tube placements due to their belief she won't have sufficient suckle response and at first it seemed they were right, but she's a tough nugget and proved everyone wrong. Her first bottle went down once Mom was able to get to the hospital, practically had to tie her down for at least twelve hours after her emergency c-section, guess where my daughter gets her nugget ness, lol.
They sent us home after a few weeks despite a rather significant exterior sac , a giant bulbousy growth from accumulated spinal fluids from the myelomeningocele. I think the doctors opinion was that she wouldn't survive corrective surgery at the time , and that an infection would most likely take her in the near term. Again she proved them wrong, she thrived despite everything.
Point being , she has That spark that drive to go against the odds and just keep going.
I'm trying to forgive myself for not using feeling, looking for that in myself, but I am now finally trying, robby, you never were a mailman down in the states ? She looks like me, but acts like you!
Your story and shares are so inspirational, your attitude is infectious, thank you and I hope you enjoy This day, and The Misses
We were unaware of her birth defects during my wife's pregnancy. Our local hospital sent us immediately to CHOP and the beginning of quite a journey. She has spina bifida and other complications, the doctors' prognosis about her survivability was rather realistic and grim. In retrospect I see they were teaching us how to care for immediate comfort and didn't expect her to make it. They released us when she stabized and basically wished us well.
I remember considerable talk of pic line /g-tube placements due to their belief she won't have sufficient suckle response and at first it seemed they were right, but she's a tough nugget and proved everyone wrong. Her first bottle went down once Mom was able to get to the hospital, practically had to tie her down for at least twelve hours after her emergency c-section, guess where my daughter gets her nugget ness, lol.
They sent us home after a few weeks despite a rather significant exterior sac , a giant bulbousy growth from accumulated spinal fluids from the myelomeningocele. I think the doctors opinion was that she wouldn't survive corrective surgery at the time , and that an infection would most likely take her in the near term. Again she proved them wrong, she thrived despite everything.
Point being , she has That spark that drive to go against the odds and just keep going.
I'm trying to forgive myself for not using feeling, looking for that in myself, but I am now finally trying, robby, you never were a mailman down in the states ? She looks like me, but acts like you!
Your story and shares are so inspirational, your attitude is infectious, thank you and I hope you enjoy This day, and The Misses
I'm more than pleased these threads continue to inspire all of us to a more abundant awareness of our real worth in our own lives. We really do have personal empowerments to make critical differences and choices to get past whatever circumstances are served up. Thanks for an amazing contribution dwtbd. Godspeed as you come to better terms with respect to your feelings.
Adventures In SpaceTime
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,827
Originally Posted by SoberJennie
Melissa & Robby, thanks for your thoughts in the last few posts on the previous thread. Maybe this is all bringing fresh to my mind and heart the ordeals with my grandmother's and mother's deaths. I was in denial for the length of my grandmother's cancer, and of course, shocked over my mom's tragic death by overdose. I don't do death well 
Denial and shock. Very reasonable original reactions to what happened. I trust these threads to continue to support a safe place for you and others, and myself and Melissa, to share these difficult experiences, perspectives, fears, and hurts. We're stronger for our sharing. I'm grateful for all of you who give of yourselves.
Adventures In SpaceTime
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,827
Originally Posted by haennie
Hi Robby, and everyone! Here, and again.
I have a story I put in my profile here that I am interested in animals... Well, this "interest" now led me into a problem that I'll have to solve, and not only for myself.
Kitties are ~3 week old and it will be a few more weeks to wean them safely. My friend and I will travel more this weekend, but he tells me/us to try to figure out all the complications necessary to transport a cat from Asia to America, and probably everywhere else...
Oh my..., and we'll see.
I have a story
I put in my profile here that I am interested in animals... Well, this "interest" now led me into a problem that I'll have to solve, and not only for myself. Kitties are ~3 week old and it will be a few more weeks to wean them safely. My friend and I will travel more this weekend, but he tells me/us to try to figure out all the complications necessary to transport a cat from Asia to America, and probably everywhere else...
Oh my..., and we'll see.
Oh my indeed.
EndGame
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,677
Hi Robby, Melissa.
The last time I was scrambling around in my sheets, I was looking for a blue pill, trying to jump start a different kind of battery.
Imagine that. The most indispensable creation in the 21st Century is batteries.
You know, Robby, you're writing a book here. And such a wonderful book it is, with contributions from people who love you. I'm saving the whole damn thing, and I'm hoping that the final page is not written for several years. You've covered just about every existential problem so far. We should recommend people who are new to SR to read it, start to finish. No, we shouldn't. They should find it on their own. It's difficult for many people to just sit still for five minutes when they're new to sobriety.
I recall that when I first got sober in 1983, I rarely slept and had few tools to distract myself from all the chaos in my mind. I was relieved that I could stop drinking, had few real cravings, but my mind and body were like a burning house. I went to AA meetings pretty much every day, often two or three times a day, and was always relieved to be there. I met a few nut cakes in AA, but the overwhelming membership were people who were serious about sobriety, most of whom had gained or regained perspective and carried a soothing sense of humor. I felt safe for the first time in a very long time.
One night, I decided to stay home and watch the NY Knicks game. They had a decent team back then, and even won the first round of the playoffs. I was less than five minutes into the game when the horns started blaring to signal an emotional meltdown. Prior to this, I was all "I'm okay. I'll be fine. I don't need to go to a meeting every day. Everything's good. Yeah, I'm good." Threw on my jacket and ran to a meeting. I don't know when, but things eventually changed for the better. I worked the Steps with my sponsor, and hung out with people who did the same. Early sobriety my first time around was one of the best times of my life.
Well put. The conviction that we actually have something to lose by getting sober or, more generally, by living a better life, is the foundation upon which individual misery -- which informs a wasted life -- often lies. The sad irony is that risking a better life has actually come to be framed as a risk, rather than a simple option. Take risks while we can. Love deeply. And give freely. The worst thing that can happen is that we'll live one kind of good life rather than another. The alternative is to live a life of cursing ourselves for giving in to our irrational fears. Remembering that I am going to die is one of the best means for me to make the hard choices in life.
You might recall the scene at the Normandy American Cemetery and Memorial in Saving Private Ryan. Matt Damon's character turns to his wife and asks, “Have I been a good man? Tell me I've lived a good life.” One of the most moving scenes for me in the history of cinematography. We honor ourselves and those who've come before us by living a good life; the very fulfillment of existence itself.
The last time I was scrambling around in my sheets, I was looking for a blue pill, trying to jump start a different kind of battery.
Imagine that. The most indispensable creation in the 21st Century is batteries.
You know, Robby, you're writing a book here. And such a wonderful book it is, with contributions from people who love you. I'm saving the whole damn thing, and I'm hoping that the final page is not written for several years. You've covered just about every existential problem so far. We should recommend people who are new to SR to read it, start to finish. No, we shouldn't. They should find it on their own. It's difficult for many people to just sit still for five minutes when they're new to sobriety.
I recall that when I first got sober in 1983, I rarely slept and had few tools to distract myself from all the chaos in my mind. I was relieved that I could stop drinking, had few real cravings, but my mind and body were like a burning house. I went to AA meetings pretty much every day, often two or three times a day, and was always relieved to be there. I met a few nut cakes in AA, but the overwhelming membership were people who were serious about sobriety, most of whom had gained or regained perspective and carried a soothing sense of humor. I felt safe for the first time in a very long time.
One night, I decided to stay home and watch the NY Knicks game. They had a decent team back then, and even won the first round of the playoffs. I was less than five minutes into the game when the horns started blaring to signal an emotional meltdown. Prior to this, I was all "I'm okay. I'll be fine. I don't need to go to a meeting every day. Everything's good. Yeah, I'm good." Threw on my jacket and ran to a meeting. I don't know when, but things eventually changed for the better. I worked the Steps with my sponsor, and hung out with people who did the same. Early sobriety my first time around was one of the best times of my life.
Originally Posted by RobbyRobot
those who choose to subjectively judge others by their own unfortunate experiences based on their own failed sobriety, or otherwise misinformed collective rhetoric, really are missing out on the more important qualities of living the good life sans alcohol and they remain in ignorance of the associated behaviors that went in hand with their own drinking and abusing of alcohol. They can't seem to see their own hand in their own dissatisfaction they project onto others.
You might recall the scene at the Normandy American Cemetery and Memorial in Saving Private Ryan. Matt Damon's character turns to his wife and asks, “Have I been a good man? Tell me I've lived a good life.” One of the most moving scenes for me in the history of cinematography. We honor ourselves and those who've come before us by living a good life; the very fulfillment of existence itself.
:
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Originally Posted by EndGameNYC
Remembering that I am going to die is one of the best means for me to make the hard choices in life.
Watching the two women closest to me in life die is what has changed me forever. Their deaths gave me the courage to get sober and change my life for the better.
EndGame
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,677
Originally Posted by RobbyRobot
Abandonment issues. Yeah. That alone is something worthy of direct discussion. Been there I have. Most of us on some level, I'm thinking. You know, being abandoned is always a scary knot to unravel is my experience. I know for myself, some such knots are better left as is, while others have been successfully opened and resolved. Best to choose these battles carefully...
Hey Della, I'm so awesomely glad you have a real measure of good humor in your life today, if not always, you know?
If we can't laugh, then all we got left is the tears. This would be entirely unacceptable, yeah?
Hey Della, I'm so awesomely glad you have a real measure of good humor in your life today, if not always, you know?
If we can't laugh, then all we got left is the tears. This would be entirely unacceptable, yeah?
Control and the desire to control others is the ugly underbelly of autonomy, a self-imposed slavery to our own fears. It is a self- and other- destructive crusade to which we become devoted with religious fervor, and which only leaves us trapped in a harsh and punishing reality. The urge to control harkens back to your other post, in which you described certain processes in terms of people not knowing or not acknowledging the role we play in constructing, and then fortifying, our own misery.
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Norfolk, MA
Posts: 792
Originally Posted by haennie;
Kitties are ~3 week old and it will be a few more weeks to wean them safely. My friend and I will travel more this weekend, but he tells me/us to try to figure out all the complications necessary to transport a cat from Asia to America, and probably everywhere else...
Oh my..., and we'll see.
:
I was vacationing on the island of Nevis, and every morning breakfast was served outside on the patio. There was one black and white cat who we would find cooling herself in a large flower pot throughout the day.
We fell in love with each other.
I should describe her appearance. She had one ear with tufts of ear hair sprouting from where the other should have been. She had half a tail.
She had an extra joint in her front left paw that tilted it sideways. The remaining ear had bite marks. In short, she was a mess. But I recognized she was a true survivor. I named her Ajax,. ( yes, she was the original), because I figured she was stronger than dirt. We got in touch with the local vet, and for the price of a cat carrier and a certificate stating she was rabies free, we were good to go.
Fast forward a week, and she was brought to the vet for a general check up. ( the only cat I know who purred when they inserted the rectal thermometer). Turned out she was pregnant. We joked about how dark a night it had to have been for some guy cat to find her attractive, "No, really, I go for one eared, half tail, limping cats. Of course I'm in for the long haul".
Well, she had one kitten I named Kitt, for the sister island to Nevis, which is where I figured Mr. Cat hightailed it to the next morning. Immediately, Ajax became Kittymama and a more loved cat there never was. We had her for 11 wonderful years. She was a tough cookie, but a sweet spirit.
Thanks for letting me reminisce. It felt good remembering her.
So, haennie, go for it! Lol
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