ChiefBromden

Mpr, two small remarks:

1. Your definition of "true alcoholic" implies that binge drinkers are never alcoholics. Do you agree with that? Or is there a possibility you might not have thought the true nature of addiction through?

2. "Recommended dosage for men". I see this often, and it turns out to be iffy at best. The actual recommendation used to be a half glass of wine for men, and no wine at all for women. This is not based on hard science, but on an estimation of the toxicity of alcohol versus some possible benefits. Since then, many nutritionists (like Barry Sears) have taken a step back and recommend no alcohol at all - purely based on nutrition, for non-alcoholics. In any case, even if it were half a glass, it sounds a bit frustrating for someone who just wants to "relax".

Not trying to prove anything, but perhaps you might want to take the above into consideration. Good luck (and I don't mean that in a passive-aggressive way).

mpr

I'll try and answer your questions here.

1. I believe there are two types of binge drinkers, one that binges by choice and can stop if he/she needed to, the second type being a true alcoholic that cannot stop if he/she wanted to.

2. I'm not too sure on the recommendations, just read a bit online, loose recommendations 2 spirits a day for men(1.5oz per) up to 14(max) per week with at least 2 days off per week. I'm not too concerned with any of that anyhow. I really doubt anyone drinks according to those guidelines anyhow.

mpr

Thanks brotha!

Just at the cabin now, can't sleep so just watching a movie. I've got reception on my cell so figured why not reply back.

Getting away was pretty nice, time we'll spent but not too sure on the drinking thing just yet.

Drinking is pointless I agree like many said but so are a lot of things in life. Every person drinking right now can potentially become an alcoholic if they know it or not, or gambler, ocd, etc anything really. Some things put one more at risk than others.

I used to smoke, I have no desire to smoke now and never would. If I smoked one, I wouldn't smoke a pack. I don't want to drink much nor do I think I would to be honest(but who does?), actually some do. I never drank much even at my worst actually. Anyhow I'm still undecided and since it isn't important I'm in no rush to decide, I'll figure it out when I figure it out, if I figure it out.

A alcoholic will find any excuse to drink, any, it's different now cause etc... point is sell themselves on it so they can have the drink immediately. I'm throwing it, we'll leaving it on the backburner. I've been tossing the idea around for awhile even before I posted it here. I'm not looking for excuses or justification cause if I was id have done it by now.

I'll be by back home tomorrow so will reply back some more then. Hope you guys all had a good weekend so far!

alumni

Typically, these published "guidelines" refer to an amount of alcohol consumed that research has shown to not be medically detrimental to the average adult. No relation to predicting abuse. Some even propose that this level of moderation may be helpful to your overall health depending on many variables such as existing diagnosed conditions, age, lifestyle, medical history, etc. Personally, I agree that they are basically meaningless to someone like you with a history of problems with this substance.
The guidelines are (unfortunately) often used by people recovering from a past alcohol problem as a benchmark they believe that they can return to and then drink like normal folks. Rarely true in my experience.
I've at times wished I could wave a magic wand and make these kinds of data disappear. I am not sure what good it actually accomplishes.

silentrun

I think you made a clean getaway 7 years ago. This has the potential to kill you and destroy everything you love. Earlier you said you just wanted to be "normal". You are leading a normal life.
I never tried moderation either. That can be a problem because people can convince themselves that maybe they could have if they tried.
Watch what Robin Williams says right around the 5.30 minute mark
Robin Williams - The Daily Show - Video Clip | Comedy Central

Soberwolf

Im really glad that you really have thought about this proving it just wasnt a simple urge to drink after 7 years tbh if you were going to drink i doubt you would have relied to nearly everyone on a 8 page thread lol its just because of the topic matter and how backwards it sounds that ppl have been replying the way they do friends dont agree on everything but they can be kind and patient and most of all understanding

this isnt my journey i have accepted that you are my friend thats what i have gained from this experience/conversation

Mpr you said it best when you said you'l figure it out when you figure it out if... you ever figure it out

this isnt my journey this is your journey and really by discussing it even tho its backwards its part of your journey and that is super important

your stubborn im wondering if your taurian like i am lol you have similar defence mechisms that i have

MPR i hope you figure it out as i really think you have something to give

hope its nice and serene in the cabin bro

mpr

Definitely. If I just wanted to convince myself to have a drink I could have done that by now for sure. I'm in no rush at all. If one day I feel compelled enough to go down that road so be it and if I don't that is okay too. Liquor store is open for another 1.5hrs, I'm back from my mini getaway, would be the perfect time for a drink.. if I wanted one, I don't. No pressure on me at all.

I am a Libra, we're pretty stubborn from what I hear lol. A lot of time I have to do something(good or bad) to find out for myself. I am just one of those people I guess. Smart people listen to others, but sometimes they listen to much and take own others thoughts as opposed to their own. It definitely is a double edged sword.

How did your weekend go?

MyTime86

Those 7 yrs you weren't drinking, I was..you aren't missing anything stay sober an healthy don't risk the work you put in to your self.

Soberwolf

Hi mpr had a great weekend glad you did too

for what its worth i hope you choose to stay sober

mpr

That is good to hear.

Yes I am sober. Who knows when or if I'll even have a drink, just play it by ear. If I feel like it I will but right now I don't see any point, which is a good thing anyhow.

Soberwolf

Mpr i wish i met you a few years ago i can see your true strenght i want to call you a crazy mofo bit like HM Murdoch from that A-Team movie

lol stay well bro

LBrain

I knew this thread would get a lot of mileage.
I just discovered a friend of mine had seven years and various times of years. He said he missed it. And is a drunk now. Thought he could have one or two. Now it's balls to the walls again. He told me don't ever drink again. You might think you can get by with just a beer or two, but in no time it's back to getting wasted. I did not know this about my friend until he told me yesterday. He stopped after his last dui for a short time. Now he's back to reckless drinking again. Every time it is after a dui he stops. Then after some time thinks he can drink again. Sad. Sad but true.

jkirk

Wow, congrats on 7 years! Why go back?? I'm 6 months clear and know I can't go back. I still go to the bar with my friends, but I can't drink in moderation. Why even experiment?? Again, a huge congrats on 7 years-keep going..

grubby

I just want to say........ the fact this thread got so huge so fast is testament to just how many people harbor this "moderation" question in the back of their minds, otherwise it wouldn't have gotten nearly as much interest as it did. As of this writing it's already up to page 9.

Just a thought

mpr

I love the old a-team tv show. I never watched the movie though, watched a few min and didn't like it. The show is awesome though!

Very true.

The thing is as abusers on any level moderation is the anti-sober. Many people can't stay sober if moderation is even the slightest possibility. Its probably a psychological thing. To remain sober one must eliminate alcohol completely and never return type thinking - and I get that for sure.

Where I'm at now I think sobriety is great, I think moderation is fine, I think abuse isn't cool, simple. I know I can remain sober, I think I can moderate, I'll never abuse - many will say I can't guarantee that but I feel I can. Then again me at my worst was probably not nearly as bad as others so it really all varies.

RobbyRobot

You'll never abuse? Such claims on the potentials of abuse are subjective at the core. Abuse isn't something you discover before the fact. Such awareness comes after abuse has already manifested. I'm surprised you have stayed quit for 7 years already. What was the original point of quitting if after 7 years of abstinence your jonesing for a drink anyways?

Please don't tell me you don't want a drink, that your still unsure, etc. Its plainly obvious you want a drink, and its more than likely you'll be having that drink when you get enough of your ducks in a row.

I think you look at drinking only as a problem if you can't quit. I, as a recovered alcoholic, see drinking itself would be a problem, being drunk a problem, and quitting a problem. Alcohol itself I don't see as a problem, lol. Why would I?

I feel sad for you mpr.

mpr

Well according to many once you have abused a substance you are doomed for eternity to abuse if you try again, correct? That is not the case I believe. I don't think it is as clear cut as many believe. It really varies person to person and it is unfair to lump everyone together.

All current drinkers(not alcoholics) have the potential to become alcoholics, sure they do, does it mean they will, no.

I know my 7 years sobriety likely surprises you and many. I also did it cold turkey - I also did that with smoking way before I quit drinking. I am not jonesing for any drink, contrary to what you believe. Truth is if I wanted a drink I would have had one by now.

What ducks do I need to line up before I have this drink you speak of? With the same sword I can say perhaps you too will have a drink and you should do not know it yet. I could but I would be full of you know what...

Part of some peoples recovery is to bash drinking, possibly drinking, social drinking, moderate drinking etc.. on any level. No drinking can be accepted, even for others. I can sit next to people drinking and have no issues, many can't do this. I differ from them in that regard, therefore my outlook in general differs as well. Some can't quit without help, I did, I differ. I'm not you and you aren't me, that is OK. You are entitled to your opinion as am I.

I am a open minded sober person. I can understand and respect other peoples points of view even if I dont agree with it. I just see things differently than you is all.

Maybe you aren't able to moderate, not even possibly, not even maybe, not even give yourself a 10% chance but I see my odds differently IF I were to do so but according to you I am lining "ducks" up so maybe you can give me an exact date as well?

silentrun

I'm only at 18 months but I have had this thought come up about moderating a few times. I never did give it a fair shot anyway. The conclusion I came to was that if I would even risk it then I have a problem. This is exactly how addict mentality works.

mpr

Many people will want to moderate cause they're desperate to drink.

I think everybody considering it would have to personally evaluate their own personal motives and not use someone else's.

I quit cold turkey lone wolf style, this won't work for many. Just cause I did it does not mean it would work for another. Same thing applies to moderation in my opinion.

jdooner

MPR - why are you here hemming and hawing about it if you are convinced its not a problem? I would think you would be drinking already.

My guess is you don't actually believe what you write. Deep inside under all the crap you are spewing you are worried this is the wrong decision. This is why you're on an anonymous website asking for permission from a bunch recovering/ed drunks and addicts.

Lets not kid ourselves, right?