grtgrandpa

I agree most with this post. I'm sober 28 years thanks to AA, and two dead daughters who needed it, but did not want it.

I would not be alive without AA, and I spent 40 years working in manufacturing and nuclear energy as a graduate chemical/metallurgical/nuclear engineer.

If I say anymore, my sponsor will tell me to stop boasting.

IOAA2

I don’t boast but am proud that with AA direction and being very active I’ve managed 35 years this past Jan. I’ll just add “But for the grace of my Higher Power.”
It works if we work it!
BE WELL

AAecon

I just rejected sponsors until I found someone I am comfortable with. In the end, my sponsor only tells me what they did and listens and responds to what I say. I believe in religion and GOD, but it is personal and I keep it private and too myself. My sponsor and AA do not run my life. Bill Wilson is not my messiah.

In the beginning I ran into a couple bad sponsors. One always had "service opportunities" or what I'd really call "exploitation opportunities." He'd ask me to mow his lawn when he was on vacation because it was good for my sobriety. Never did it. Another confronted me for making decisions about jobs, family, and life without their approval. So, yes, all the really bad things you hear about are real. But, NO ONE can make you do anything in AA.

Hang in there, be assertive when people you are not comfortable come at you or tell you things you are not comfortable with, and you will find other reasonable people if you try.

desypete

speaking as someone who is on the wrong side of the % score the 9 9 % who dont make it i would say your a very lucky man indeed but surely you should feel something about the 9 9 % who never make it ?

desypete

i have never heard anyone getting a sponcee to cut there lawn for them before. gives me a great idea as to who can cut my lawn next for me : ) i hate cutting the grass but then i think my sponcee would tell me were to go as i would tell him were to go if he ever asked someone lol

thats what sponsorship is all about not owning them but letting them be themselves and they will grow no need to dictate else you end up with little packs of aa memebers grouping up together and there sponsor is there god who will control them,

Altoids

Personally, I don't think there is one "right" way to achieve sobriety.. . . except that we have to want it and to do whatever we need to do to keep it.

IOAA2

Hi. If my undisciplined thinking pattern thought that way I’d be drinking today because, especially when new, I knew more than the seasoned veterans staying sober. I recall “our way or the highway.” Short and blunt and With too many going that route.
We learn fast that getting sober and staying sober is work and it’s something we need to accept, the roadside is awash with those looking for the softest easiest way.

BE WELL

tomsteve

of course I have feelings about them. met quite a few who have since passed away from cancer and im very blessed God put them in my life.

Gargery

Try it a few times. The fact that AA has helped some people may be anecdotal, but that doesn't mean it won't help you. I think it's worth investigating for every addict who wants to quit. If you decide it isn't for you, no harm no foul.

MattM316

I'm going for the first time on Sunday.

Like the original poster I am still skeptical about any religious aspect involved seeing as i'm an atheist and always have been.
I don't want to go there and end up arguing about religion, because that is what tends to happen when I engage with very religious people.
I think i'll keep quiet the first time and try to figure out the other people around me, fingers crossed!

dSober

It was for me. I went, off and on, for years. I never forgot what I learned there and finally got it and did it. Now I have no regrets, certainly not about that but not about anything else either.

desypete

i have been an aa member for the last 10 years and dont believe in god and never will believe in one

there are plenty of non god people around in aa just avoid the ones who you feel uncomfortable with

if someone comes up to you who says to you i will be your sponsor at your first meeting avoid them like the plague and find someone you feel comfortable with and who seems at peace with themselves,

try many different types of aa meetings dont judge it by the first meeting

aa meetings are not about god there a place were drunks meet up to try to help each other and the still suffering drunk
you will get lots of practical advice like got
like dont pick up that first drink when your head is going and your feeling like running off down to get some booze ring someone up clean your shoes go for a walk do whatever it takes to get busy and take you mind off it

get some phone number from the other members who should offer it up to you at the meeting and use them
dont sit and try it on your own call someone up as you might be helping them just as much as helping yourself

this is what aa is about and the love and help you as a new comer will find in the meetings and of course the best advice i ever got was
keep coming back, even if you drink again keep coming back

we have people turn up in meetings drunk as skunks tramps pop by for a free biscuit and to try to get some money from time to time
aa is open for all not just the few rich or well off

i love the place with all my heart and its simple way of life something i have never been able to do before in my life is keep anything simple

good luck to you and i hope you give it a try

MattM316

I've always been unsure what people mean by a sponsor, can anyone explain?

dSober

A guide to sobriety.

RobbyRobot

With respect to AA here is the standard classic pamphlet

http://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/p-15_Q&AonSpon.pdf

My sponsor took me thru the steps. I've in turn taken some others thru the steps. Sponsorship is a rewarding experience for all when those involved work together for their greater good and success.

1newcreation

As big bk says, no pun intended, we've ceased fighting anyone & anything. If a mtg doesn't fit you, go elsewhere. I realized aa doesn't need me, I need it so my choices are either to accept it or change it! Good eg is mtgs where folks use profanity while sharing; doesn't bother me much but when Lord's name is taken in vain repeatedly, I'm ready to jet out the door. Learning love & tolerance but there's gotta be boundary for me @ least
Get grounded w/ sponsor & network that are like minded or share some issues not necessarily agree on evthg otherwise won't grow or be receptive to correction
Best wishes

Dee74

After a good deal of deliberation, I removed a number of posts in this thread that went off on a tangent - one of my posts included.

I think it's best we stick to the topic here, or as close as possible.

Thanks

Dee
Moderator
SR

yeahgr8

If you look at the program of AA as the steps, which is most certainly is, then you will see very big comparisons to CBT. Working through the steps is a very tangible solution to the mental obsession for alcohol as much as working through an extremely intensive CBT course for addiction.

AA is also a support group which i believe that most medical professionals would recognise is very important in recovery and learning new life skills with which to cope with life on a daily basis.

If one does not agree with the philosophy in the Bible like treating people as you would like to be treated, if in doubt be kind, feel compassion for another human being and other such ideals then it might now be for them.

DoubleBarrel

Can you provide peer reviewed scientific evidence for the existence of love, or how support and sympathy works, or peer pressure? Can you explain the 100th monkey?

Some things work. We don't know how or why. And I'm a very scientific guy. But our brains are a system of input and experience, memory and emotion, instinct and intellect, not a laboratory.

No one in AA should try and convince you it's the only way, in my opinion. There is nothing cultish about it, it's just a way for people with a common problem to come together and work on all the various reasons we became alcoholic, and arrest it.

SoberCAH

I agree with grtgrandpa and IOAA2.

Next month will, I hope, be 26 years for me, and I credit all of my sobriety to God and AA.

I certainly drank pathologically for quite a few years.