Thought I had it beat - can't quit!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by zjw 
I know a guy he's a great father has a crappy house crappy cars 3 kids. Happy as a clam and a good father. I said geeze i've got what i got which is much more then him and i'm a miserable soul. Whats wrong with me? Perspective has a lot to do with it.
I met another guy rides up on a bicycle. Says he just got done seeing his daughter. HIm and his wife split up he's homeless all he has is that bike. I said wow gosh thinking about my troubles I thought he has way worse then me poor guy. He says but i'm happy he says i dunno where bottom is but i aint hit yet tonight i'm gonna sleep under the stars and it'll be great.
I was out for a walk went to my neighbor i was having a bad day probs probs probs. First thing i did was tell the neighbor about my prob to which he tells me his wife broke her hip and was in the hospital he was all broken up. I felt really bad even mentioning my problem to him cause my problem was nothing compared to his.
Someone told me one time i sound like an idiot I'm like the guy who's complaining i dont like my shoes to the guy who doesnt have any feet.
Perspective makes a big difference.
I met another guy rides up on a bicycle. Says he just got done seeing his daughter. HIm and his wife split up he's homeless all he has is that bike. I said wow gosh thinking about my troubles I thought he has way worse then me poor guy. He says but i'm happy he says i dunno where bottom is but i aint hit yet tonight i'm gonna sleep under the stars and it'll be great.
I was out for a walk went to my neighbor i was having a bad day probs probs probs. First thing i did was tell the neighbor about my prob to which he tells me his wife broke her hip and was in the hospital he was all broken up. I felt really bad even mentioning my problem to him cause my problem was nothing compared to his.
Someone told me one time i sound like an idiot I'm like the guy who's complaining i dont like my shoes to the guy who doesnt have any feet.
Perspective makes a big difference.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 8,336
You love your family very much. Placing your family in your current financial situation causes you pain and guilt. I'm learning to let go of guilt...it was an intricate part of why I "numbed" myself.
Remain sober. What's for dinner tonight? Do you need ingredients from the store? Have you placed your guitar in your grandchild's hands? Remain sober.
Remain sober. What's for dinner tonight? Do you need ingredients from the store? Have you placed your guitar in your grandchild's hands? Remain sober.
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
I'll do some of the dumbest things to pass the time. I got an old CB radio and an antenna for next to nothing at a junk shop that brought me hours of tinkering fun accomplishing absolutly nothing. My wife thinks i'm insane but it brought a smile to my face and memories of the days when i had one and used to talk to truckers etc... One trucker sung a song on it now i got the whole family singen that stupid song haha.
I'll clean things that dont even need to be cleaned or polish stuff just for the heck of it. I'll turn the compost pile again. I've read ions of books. And heck scouring the internet for information is a more productive use of anyones time then drinking and feeling bad is.
I'll clean things that dont even need to be cleaned or polish stuff just for the heck of it. I'll turn the compost pile again. I've read ions of books. And heck scouring the internet for information is a more productive use of anyones time then drinking and feeling bad is.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by Pondlady
You love your family very much. Placing your family in your current financial situation causes you pain and guilt. I'm learning to let go of guilt...it was an intricate part of why I "numbed" myself.
Remain sober. What's for dinner tonight? Do you need ingredients from the store? Have you placed your guitar in your grandchild's hands? Remain sober.
Remain sober. What's for dinner tonight? Do you need ingredients from the store? Have you placed your guitar in your grandchild's hands? Remain sober.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by zjw
I'll do some of the dumbest things to pass the time. I got an old CB radio and an antenna for next to nothing at a junk shop that brought me hours of tinkering fun accomplishing absolutly nothing. My wife thinks i'm insane but it brought a smile to my face and memories of the days when i had one and used to talk to truckers etc... One trucker sung a song on it now i got the whole family singen that stupid song haha.
I'll clean things that dont even need to be cleaned or polish stuff just for the heck of it. I'll turn the compost pile again. I've read ions of books. And heck scouring the internet for information is a more productive use of anyones time then drinking and feeling bad is.
I'll clean things that dont even need to be cleaned or polish stuff just for the heck of it. I'll turn the compost pile again. I've read ions of books. And heck scouring the internet for information is a more productive use of anyones time then drinking and feeling bad is.
I looked like that holdin beer
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 627
Would you be able to give guitar lessens for money on the side? I know that might not be a lot of money, but maybe enough to do some things on the weekend with your wife. Maybe there are other financial opportunities/things you could do from home to earn money.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by MetalChick
Would you be able to give guitar lessens for money on the side? I know that might not be a lot of money, but maybe enough to do some things on the weekend with your wife. Maybe there are other financial opportunities/things you could do from home to earn money.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by 2granddaughters
My alcoholism got so bad that I had to go to AA for recovery.
All the best Joe.
Bob R
All the best Joe.
Bob R
I have to find peace within myself and be thankful for all I have today, because tomorrow may never come. Peace to you Bob!
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Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Vashon WA
Posts: 1,035
I thought I was losing my mind for the first couple of months. After six months it got much easier. I'm now almost to nine months and I still want a beer sometimes but at this point you'd have to knock me out and pour it down my unconscious mouth to get me to drink. Just remembering how much I hated my own drinking--the hangovers, the shame, the BS--keeps me on the straight and narrow.
I have always been nuts for music and I have found it to be very therapeutic.
I have always been nuts for music and I have found it to be very therapeutic.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 56
hey Joe?
You've seen what all there is to be grateful for. Is there a chance you're thinking yourself to death? You and that grandbaby can hang outside, watch funny stuff online....she gets one-on-one time with the most awesome grandpa ever, in her eyes. We see things way differently from others.
I get really down on myself a lot too, when my son's seizures are bad and when it's too hot to go out anywhere (and lifting him into the car? UGH! Heavy paralyzed kid!) But...talking with sober people whose lives surprised them with disability generally reminds me that we get other super cool stuff. I still get angry at my mental illness, at my kid's illness, at stupid people who ask what's wrong with me that he's disabled...and then I think "Wow. I don't have to get drunk at you folks, and I'm so glad I don't have to hang out with insensitive people."
Congrats on your two days! It's a good thing.
You've seen what all there is to be grateful for. Is there a chance you're thinking yourself to death? You and that grandbaby can hang outside, watch funny stuff online....she gets one-on-one time with the most awesome grandpa ever, in her eyes. We see things way differently from others.
I get really down on myself a lot too, when my son's seizures are bad and when it's too hot to go out anywhere (and lifting him into the car? UGH! Heavy paralyzed kid!) But...talking with sober people whose lives surprised them with disability generally reminds me that we get other super cool stuff. I still get angry at my mental illness, at my kid's illness, at stupid people who ask what's wrong with me that he's disabled...and then I think "Wow. I don't have to get drunk at you folks, and I'm so glad I don't have to hang out with insensitive people."
Congrats on your two days! It's a good thing.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by gaffo
I thought I was losing my mind for the first couple of months. After six months it got much easier. I'm now almost to nine months and I still want a beer sometimes but at this point you'd have to knock me out and pour it down my unconscious mouth to get me to drink. Just remembering how much I hated my own drinking--the hangovers, the shame, the BS--keeps me on the straight and narrow.
I have always been nuts for music and I have found it to be very therapeutic.
I have always been nuts for music and I have found it to be very therapeutic.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by Pondlady
Hmmmm.....pork stir fry....you're making me hungry
Sounds like you enjoy cooking.
Sounds like you enjoy cooking.Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
I make bread and cookies well and lot of other things too. But the bread and the cookies are the main theraputic ones i do. Fresh bread gets everyone in this house happy and fast same with a bazillion cookies cause dad went nuts again.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by zjw
I make bread and cookies well and lot of other things too. But the bread and the cookies are the main theraputic ones i do. Fresh bread gets everyone in this house happy and fast same with a bazillion cookies cause dad went nuts again.
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 2,937
Not useful?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Where did you get that one from?
Your deluded my friend.
If you look after a child everyday, you must be one of the most useful people I know!
Gosh that's one of the hardest jobs in the whole world! i think it's also one of the most pleasure giving jobs, but it's hard work.
How awesome your grandchild gets to see her Grandad everyday?
Some kids never even get to meet their grandparents due to a variety of circumstances, let alone spend stacks of time together.
i think your a pretty special guy really. you just don't realise it cos your knee deep in regret and worry.
Get out in the frsh air and start exploring our world with your little travel companion - most of it is free!
xx
Where did you get that one from?
Your deluded my friend.
If you look after a child everyday, you must be one of the most useful people I know!
Gosh that's one of the hardest jobs in the whole world! i think it's also one of the most pleasure giving jobs, but it's hard work.
How awesome your grandchild gets to see her Grandad everyday?
Some kids never even get to meet their grandparents due to a variety of circumstances, let alone spend stacks of time together.
i think your a pretty special guy really. you just don't realise it cos your knee deep in regret and worry.
Get out in the frsh air and start exploring our world with your little travel companion - most of it is free!
xx
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by Sasha4
Not useful?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Where did you get that one from?
Your deluded my friend.
If you look after a child everyday, you must be one of the most useful people I know!
Gosh that's one of the hardest jobs in the whole world! i think it's also one of the most pleasure giving jobs, but it's hard work.
How awesome your grandchild gets to see her Grandad everyday?
Some kids never even get to meet their grandparents due to a variety of circumstances, let alone spend stacks of time together.
i think your a pretty special guy really. you just don't realise it cos your knee deep in regret and worry.
Get out in the frsh air and start exploring our world with your little travel companion - most of it is free!
xx
Where did you get that one from?
Your deluded my friend.
If you look after a child everyday, you must be one of the most useful people I know!
Gosh that's one of the hardest jobs in the whole world! i think it's also one of the most pleasure giving jobs, but it's hard work.
How awesome your grandchild gets to see her Grandad everyday?
Some kids never even get to meet their grandparents due to a variety of circumstances, let alone spend stacks of time together.
i think your a pretty special guy really. you just don't realise it cos your knee deep in regret and worry.
Get out in the frsh air and start exploring our world with your little travel companion - most of it is free!
xx
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 328
For what it's worth, I was raised mostly by my grandparents because both my parents were working when I was very small.
I remained very attached to them because of that. I also definitely don't think they were useless. At all.
I remained very attached to them because of that. I also definitely don't think they were useless. At all.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 2,937
Honestly - I have a 2 year old and i am about an hours drive from my parents.
She goes to day care and while she enjoys it, there are some days when she might be tired or clingy or a bit unwell, and I wish more than anything my mum and dad were 2 mins away so she could go be looked after by them.
I always say to my friends - when you have chidren yourself you realise how much you need your parents. They are invaluable.
Keep going my friend, the battles not over xx
She goes to day care and while she enjoys it, there are some days when she might be tired or clingy or a bit unwell, and I wish more than anything my mum and dad were 2 mins away so she could go be looked after by them.
I always say to my friends - when you have chidren yourself you realise how much you need your parents. They are invaluable.
Keep going my friend, the battles not over xx
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