DrivenHeart85

So, I've gone through alcohol withdrawal many times, but each time I do, it seems to get worse. The first time, nothing. The second time, some night sweats and then this time is way weird. Last night I had night sweats, nightmares, I jolted out of sleep at one point and thought my Mac had strangely started playing an audiobook I was listening to before bed but I went out there and it was still in sleep mode...I couldn't figure out if the sentence I heard was from a dream or reality. Then today, I go to work and by 2pm I have to go home sick because I felt like I was just in another world and so dizzy. 72 hours is tonight so hopefully the worst is over.

What I've been doing is, "If it doesn't work for you, try something else." So that explains the multiple "drink, then don't drink" phases. I've felt like someone trying to tear down a brick wall with only bare hands...sure, it sounds impossible, but if you're the only thing that can tear down the wall and you can't live on the side of the wall you're on anymore, you WILL find a way to break through it!

Anyway, the past month or so of trying to exorcise my drinking addiction has been so taxing, it's just like every cell in my mind and body is just exhausted...it's a mental, emotional, physical fatigue that I've never known before but I will endure every second of it because that's exactly what I need to be doing.

suki44883

Hang in there and keep pushing on through. It's true that each withdrawal is worse than the one before it. You can make this the last time you ever have to go through this.

least

I so understand. The awful w/d too often sent me back to the bottle, only to have to go thru it all over when I quit again... And yes, the w/d does get worse. My last relapse (the very last) was only for two days and yet I was sicker than I'd ever been and thought I would surely die, actually wished I would die just to get it over with...

That's a big help for me staying sober: knowing I never have to go thru that agony again.

Dee74

I'd never heard of 'kindling' when I was detoxing but it sure matches my experience:
Kindling (sedative-hypnotic withdrawal) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

I'd withdrawn safely without assistance 100s of times - the 101st time I wasn't so lucky.
Please see a Dr if you're still in any way unwell or have concerns.

I think "If it doesn't work for you, try something else." is a good plan - but I found I had to leave my comfort zone too - I was so 'smart' I was actually getting in my own way a lot of the time.

I had challenge myself, do things I found uncomfortable and I had to involve other hands and other minds in my brick wall tearing down process.

In the end I had to go against type, stop thinking about it - and just take action.

I made a commitment not to drink again - I was prepared to do anything positive that I could think of to ensure that - I would have tied myself to the bed if needs be.

I rode out the cravings, I called a lot of people for help, I spent a lot of time here reading, posting, and helping others....and slowly I got some sober time behind me, and my perspectives on a lot things began to change

I hope, whatever path you take, this time is your time DH
Welcome
D

Justfor1

Luckily the last 1 day slip I had did not require the usual professional detox. However, it is true that detoxes get worse & worse as one gets older and the length of boozing increases. I have had DT's in past and have been told that they will likely occur again if I go through another serious detox. I think my age is starting to factor in also.

DrivenHeart85

I never knew they got worse, I always assumed that if you started breaking up your dependency with a few sober days or weeks, it'd lead to less harsh of a withdrawal...not so much apparently. My heart is telling my this is my last withdrawal though...whatever it is that I thought alcohol had to offer me, just isn't even slightly worth it anymore and I'd tie myself to my bed too if I had to. lol

freethinking

I can relate to your withdrawal. I DREADED nighttime when I would detox myself at home....for me, there was little distinction between dreams and reality. I would *think* I was just laying there trying to fall asleep. It was sort of like I was half dreaming and half awake. That's probably as close to the dark side as I've ever gotten...almost like a bad trip. Neurologically, I was really shot this last time. I would hear things, see things and was very skiddish (the littlest noises would cause me to jump). It's kind of scary to look back and see how bad I had gotten but for me at the time, it was "just another detox" and par for the course. Insane....really insane.

And now fast forward to today...I'm a pretty upbeat person and feeling very grateful for the smallest of things in my life. yet it was only 6 months ago that I was detoxing like that.

My only advice is to remember any bad thing you've ever been through and never thought you'd get through....but you DID get through it. This is just like that....you'll get through it and someday look back at it as if it maybe even happened to someone else. Baby steps.

loveon2legs

Oh yes I can relate....I drank after almost 2 years sober...and felt just horrible for 9 days...I can compare it to being poisoned....it was horrendous....my body was disgusted! Somebody here had asked me if this feeling would keep me in sobriety....and the answer to that was no...not that alone....it takes so much more than that feeling of sickness to keep me from drinking again....

Joybot

I don't think I've gone through a withdrawal stage yet because the most I've been without Alcohol is probably 2 weeks at best but it was until two days ago when I started having straight nightmares and feeling not quite all there after three days of not drinking and this was from last week heaviest drinking session I've had in my life. Today mark my 3rd day without drinking and I dread going to sleep.

People who haven't seen me in a while all think I look terrible. I'm drinking tea and Gatorade and right now, I don't have the urge to drink, nor have any urge to go out and buy alcohol.

3 days and counting.... But if the withdrawal gets worse, I'm going to down a cold bottle of beer.

least

Might be a better idea to get medical help to get you safely thru the w/d. Drinking just means the w/d will start all over when you stop drinking agan.

Joybot

Had no idea my Withdrawl started because in the last 3 days without alcohol, I have had the worst night of my night last night and didn't sleep a wink even thought my eyes were closed and my body felt rested; I was tossing and turning from 2 until 5 in the morning.

For a normal functioning person, you never know the exact moment when you fall asleep because you just do but for someone going through withdrawal, it seems like the stages from resting to actually sleeping turns into a dreadful feeling of sluggishness that doesn't gradually smooth itself over into the sleep cycle but rather just dumps you right into it and you can feel your whole body becoming weaker and then the jolting starts as soon as you fall into deep sleep. Every time I feel myself sleeping, my body jolts and I wake up again.

I just had a 2 hour nap and I feel better now.

Scolova

This is still a pretty big problem for me at 48 days, although I am getting better at dealing with them (hypnic jerks). I actually feel like I am having a stroke when they happen and I have often slept on the floor because of it (can't fall off the floor, right?. LOL) I've recorded myself sleeping and captured a few of them (plus a whole lot of toss-n-turning), just in case I need to see a doctor and show them what happens. I worked through one last night and did manage to sleep in my bed.
Good Luck, I know it's miserable.

Joybot

Sorry to hear that the annoying jolt persisted into day 48 for you. Last night was the first time I experienced anything in all my 3 years of heavy drinking.

It may have something to do with your nervous system. It sounds to me like a really annoying case of body hiccups. Hope you get better and Godspeed.

Scolova

Thanks, I know I am now having to pay for all of the years I used alcohol as a sleeping aid (as many of us have done), that first stage of sleep becomes very difficult, but it's all worth it.

whiskeyman

how can we stress enough for someone quitting at the slightess sign of a withdrawl symptom go and get help.
i thought i could do it alone and not see the doctor.
i didnt wanna waste his time as i had been there before for the same thing.
Day 4 was he worst day of my life. Woke up in the middle of the night with incredible brain shocks, trembling sweats and thought i was going tohave a seizure.
i caleed a freind at 4 am to rush me to the hospital
while there i knew that i was heading for a seizure as my body was violently revolting.
and i didnt really drink for that long 3 years but i was an everyday drinker

GAWD, your life is so important why f*ck around with it.
Go and get help but then do something about it after you get out. Dont repeat the same pattern. Next time could be fatal.

love everyone here

TheOjibway84

"sleeping turns into a dreadful feeling of sluggishness that doesn't gradually smooth itself over into the sleep cycle but rather just dumps you right into it and you can feel your whole body becoming weaker and then the jolting starts as soon as you fall into deep sleep. Every time I feel myself sleeping, my body jolts and I wake up again."

I remember going through that after 4 days of straight drinking 3 months ago. It was horrible. I hardly slept because as I started drifting off it felt like I was going to die really. I'd finally drift into sleep but jolt right awake in a panic etc. It wasn't pleasant. I was only able to go to sleep like 20 minutes at a time I looked horrible myself too, when my parents came over to my place to ask if I would like to come back home and live there alcohol free they thought I was drunk when they showed up because I was a mess, eyes were blood red due to not sleeping and it took them alot to convince them I wasn't drunk even showed them the amount I had in my account to prove I didn't drink since 4 days ago etc. W/D can be very scary and I never assumed I'd ever get to that point. I always pondered whatever happened to just the common headache from a hangover? Because now it's more the hangover, feet cramps, shakes etc. Well good luck with recovery it's worth it really as I said Im 3 months sober now and things are great Ive gotten back to my normal self but now as a fact that my battle with alcohol is long from over and I can't get too eager that I'm free from it because I did before over and over again and I always drank again and again. Good luck. 1 day at a time

NYCDoglvr

I'm sure it's rough. Might be easier just to deal with being an alcoholic and getting into a program. In very early sobriety someone at an AA meeting said "you don't have to drink". Astonishing to me at the time, I'd always assumed it would be impossible. So instead of drinking every day I decided each day to not drink. I'm not someone who could get or stay sober on my own, I went to AA because of the support of other alcoholics.

joeclayvowell

I just got done going through withdrawals myself, luckily only lasted two days but like always they it was very rough and made me feel helpless. The insomnia is the worst, at least when I am sick after one night of drinking I can sleep off the hangover but after binging for 3 days this is impossible. Couldnt eat, couldnt sleep, the depression and anxiety is also nearly unbearable. I felt like at any second I was going to have a panic attack or seizure and wind up in the hospital again. I hate going to the hospital for alcohol related reasons because I feel like the staff there is annoyed they have to deal with a drunk, that and I dont have insurance. good luck