Assuming We Are Spiritually Fit?
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Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 812
Assuming We Are Spiritually Fit?
Assuming we are spiritually fit, we can do all sorts of things alcoholics are not supposed to do. People have said we must not go where liquor is served; we must not have it in our homes; we must shun friends who drink; we must avoid moving pictures which show drinking scenes; we must not go into bars; our friends must hide their bottles if we go to their houses; we mustn't think or be reminded about alcohol at all. Our experience shows that this is not necessarily so. Page 100-101
For example, I’ve talked with people who seem to be very spiritually fit in some areas, but not so much in others. One example would be a person I know who truly lives the program and principles, yet makes racist statements without seeming to know that they are racist. Another person I admire works a great program in all areas (as far as I can tell) until a pretty young newcomer walks through the door. At that point his spiritual fitness appears to go out the window.
To me, it seems the above examples show that one can be spiritually fit in some areas of their life but maybe not so much in others? Perhaps spiritual fitness is not just one thing, but multi-faceted?
So if we can have unhealthy "blind spots," and remain unaware of them, then how can any one of us truly "assume we are spiritually fit"?
Looking for some insight on this matter.
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Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 65
Three things I absolutely need to be spiritually fit:
Prayer and meditation every morning.
Talking to other alcoholics during the day.
Helping out a new man when the opportunity presents itself.
Without those three ingredients, my spiritual fitness usually suffers.
Prayer and meditation every morning.
Talking to other alcoholics during the day.
Helping out a new man when the opportunity presents itself.
Without those three ingredients, my spiritual fitness usually suffers.
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,697
I think it's like the difference between being awake and being asleep.
Sometimes when I have been sleeping (literally), I could honestly believe events took place that really didnt - I had been dreaming.
The events that take place while I am awake have a different texture to them..I guess you could say "it's a feeling".
Spiritual fitness? A quiet mind.
So the unhealthy(??) blindspots...I guess these are our shortcomings and character defects. I believe they are removed as god sees fit, not as I WISH they are. I need to rub people the wrong way...to learn lessons, be shown the errors in my natural tendencies. My defects of character may very well be that which keeps me grounded, human.
The day I think I am spiritually fit is the day I need to ask for help. Sort of like "the path is the goal"...
Sometimes when I have been sleeping (literally), I could honestly believe events took place that really didnt - I had been dreaming.
The events that take place while I am awake have a different texture to them..I guess you could say "it's a feeling".
Spiritual fitness? A quiet mind.
So the unhealthy(??) blindspots...I guess these are our shortcomings and character defects. I believe they are removed as god sees fit, not as I WISH they are. I need to rub people the wrong way...to learn lessons, be shown the errors in my natural tendencies. My defects of character may very well be that which keeps me grounded, human.
The day I think I am spiritually fit is the day I need to ask for help. Sort of like "the path is the goal"...
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
That was the topic at my noon meeting.....
It was a large group so we were not sharing in depth
wanting everyone to be heard. I was called on first.
Thanks for an interesting topic....
It was a large group so we were not sharing in depth
wanting everyone to be heard. I was called on first.
As long as I don't drink and practice the Golden Rule
I consider I am a recovery miracle by God's Grace.
I consider I am a recovery miracle by God's Grace.
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 112
Nice question.
Let me take this tack rather than dive right in.
If a person has cancer or diabetese but is otherwise physically fit, do you consider him 'physically fit' ?
I think probably not. For the military or a job that requires a physical you must be physically fit in all areas, not just some.
So, if I am in AA and acting out on glaring defects then I am probably not spiritually fit in any meaningful sense of the word.
Of course I don't think your examples represent 'glaring' defects anyway. We all struggle with one thing or another constantly. The flesh is the flesh.
But guys who are really acting out are headed for trouble. Even if they manage not to drink, there will be some kind of emotional hell to pay. That's my experience anyway.
Let me take this tack rather than dive right in.
If a person has cancer or diabetese but is otherwise physically fit, do you consider him 'physically fit' ?
I think probably not. For the military or a job that requires a physical you must be physically fit in all areas, not just some.
So, if I am in AA and acting out on glaring defects then I am probably not spiritually fit in any meaningful sense of the word.
Of course I don't think your examples represent 'glaring' defects anyway. We all struggle with one thing or another constantly. The flesh is the flesh.
But guys who are really acting out are headed for trouble. Even if they manage not to drink, there will be some kind of emotional hell to pay. That's my experience anyway.
Originally Posted by Pagekeeper 
How do you gauge “spiritual fitness”? Is one spiritually fit if they have completed the 12 steps and continue to practice them? Is spiritual fitness one entity, like overall spiritual health, or can a person be spiritually fit in one area of their life but not spiritually fit in another?
For example, I’ve talked with people who seem to be very spiritually fit in some areas, but not so much in others. One example would be a person I know who truly lives the program and principles, yet makes racist statements without seeming to know that they are racist. Another person I admire works a great program in all areas (as far as I can tell) until a pretty young newcomer walks through the door. At that point his spiritual fitness appears to go out the window.
To me, it seems the above examples show that one can be spiritually fit in some areas of their life but maybe not so much in others? Perhaps spiritual fitness is not just one thing, but multi-faceted?
So if we can have unhealthy "blind spots," and remain unaware of them, then how can any one of us truly "assume we are spiritually fit"?
Looking for some insight on this matter.
For example, I’ve talked with people who seem to be very spiritually fit in some areas, but not so much in others. One example would be a person I know who truly lives the program and principles, yet makes racist statements without seeming to know that they are racist. Another person I admire works a great program in all areas (as far as I can tell) until a pretty young newcomer walks through the door. At that point his spiritual fitness appears to go out the window.
To me, it seems the above examples show that one can be spiritually fit in some areas of their life but maybe not so much in others? Perhaps spiritual fitness is not just one thing, but multi-faceted?
So if we can have unhealthy "blind spots," and remain unaware of them, then how can any one of us truly "assume we are spiritually fit"?
Looking for some insight on this matter.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 6,947
Assuming we are spiritually fit? Well, progress, but not perfection. Bill W., I guess, loved the ladies and acted out.... but he remained spiritually fit enough to stay sober... personally I don't get it, how could that be?..... But that's where your question becomes somewhat subjective. So we all have our own code of ethics... when I break mine I get mighty uncomfortable and my spiritual fitness suffers greatly.
I have a much higher tolerance of a man who may share his observations of a beautiful woman with me, as long as they do not threaten her dignity, in my eyes or hers, than of a racial epithet... for which I have zero tolerance.... but others may have other set points...
Your examples are real world and for that reason, difficult.
So, I stuck my neck a little, uh?
I have a much higher tolerance of a man who may share his observations of a beautiful woman with me, as long as they do not threaten her dignity, in my eyes or hers, than of a racial epithet... for which I have zero tolerance.... but others may have other set points...
Your examples are real world and for that reason, difficult.
So, I stuck my neck a little, uh?
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 3,095
In reference to page 100, I simply follow the directions. No matter how secure I feel, or how long I've been sober, when I'm faced with a certain situation, I open that book to page 101 and follow the directions. I ask myself if I have good reason to be there. I follow the directions for how to conduct myself.
A part of my spiritual fitness is constant willingness to live by spiritual principles. When I think I don't have to do certain actions, my spiritual condition is already shaky.
I know that I do not know. I know that a year from now, or 10 years from now, I'll see things differently. If I'm in a state of already knowing, then I don't seek guidance. But if I'm in a state of knowing I don't know, I can let myself be guided. Spiritual fitness is a path, an action, not a place I rest.
And like Music said, you just know. I know because I feel that conscious contact. I hear the spiritual music in the world.
A part of my spiritual fitness is constant willingness to live by spiritual principles. When I think I don't have to do certain actions, my spiritual condition is already shaky.
I know that I do not know. I know that a year from now, or 10 years from now, I'll see things differently. If I'm in a state of already knowing, then I don't seek guidance. But if I'm in a state of knowing I don't know, I can let myself be guided. Spiritual fitness is a path, an action, not a place I rest.
And like Music said, you just know. I know because I feel that conscious contact. I hear the spiritual music in the world.
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Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: nj
Posts: 541
Originally Posted by Pagekeeper
How do you gauge “spiritual fitness”? .
When I find thoughts of a drink creeping into my head, or have a drunk dream, I assume a problem somewhere in my ' spiritual fitness'. The remedy? Steps 10 and 11.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 812
Thank you for all of your responses. Lots of great insight and helpful.
I only know, for myself, that there have been times when I felt connected and "spiritually fit," but it's never been constant and it changes.
And there are defects that I wasn't aware of a few months ago that I'm aware of now--yet even though I was not aware of those defects, and still had them and acted on them, I felt good spiritually at the time. So knowing now what I didn't know then got me thinking. If that makes sense. Because I still have blind spots, things I'm unaware of, you know the saying: More will be revealed. Sometimes that "more" isn't what I'd like to see, but I know it's necessary if I'm to grow spiritually.
Again, I appreciate the responses.
I only know, for myself, that there have been times when I felt connected and "spiritually fit," but it's never been constant and it changes.
And there are defects that I wasn't aware of a few months ago that I'm aware of now--yet even though I was not aware of those defects, and still had them and acted on them, I felt good spiritually at the time. So knowing now what I didn't know then got me thinking. If that makes sense. Because I still have blind spots, things I'm unaware of, you know the saying: More will be revealed. Sometimes that "more" isn't what I'd like to see, but I know it's necessary if I'm to grow spiritually.
Again, I appreciate the responses.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 812
I don't know, Mark.
It does say in Step 10 (after 10th step promises) of the BB:
Then right before step 11 it says:
The beginning of the 11th step suggests prayer and meditation, but it also suggests that personal inventory each night.
It does say in Step 10 (after 10th step promises) of the BB:
That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.
If we have carefully followed directions, we have begun to sense the flow of His Spirit into us. To some extent we have become God-conscious. We have begun to develop this vital 6th sense. But we must go further and that means more action. .
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,697
I would suggest that mindfulness of character defects is a sign of spiritual fitness.
Self Will run riot has a sense of 'not being aware of how our actions or lack of action affect those around us'...I think when I take the time to recognize my selfishness and act to move in another direction (become other-centered if possible), make ammends for harm, etc - that is effective living and things just seem to come together without effort.
Self Will run riot has a sense of 'not being aware of how our actions or lack of action affect those around us'...I think when I take the time to recognize my selfishness and act to move in another direction (become other-centered if possible), make ammends for harm, etc - that is effective living and things just seem to come together without effort.
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 112
To me it is. But I'm a traditionalist.
I can act out on my character defects and feel pretty good for a pretty long time. So I don't go by how I feel inside. (at least not only by that)
I'll get hit with the emotional hangover down the line but on any given day, I can feel fine acting out on a character defect.
I go by what I'm doing more than how I'm feeling. And, in the end, doing the right thing does make me feel better. Maybe not right away, but eventually.
It's more like "am I doing God's will today" rather than "do I feel good/bad/peacful/agitated...etc today". That's the main question I ask myself.
As an alcoholic I always want to 'feel good now'. To me, part of my spiritual growth is to get beyond that and try to just focus on doing the 'right thing now'.
You bring up a good point about people (Bill maybe ??) acting out on major defects and not drinking. But, to me that's like playing russian roulette. Just because one guy puts the gun to his head and pulls trigger doesn't make me want to try it next !!
I can act out on my character defects and feel pretty good for a pretty long time. So I don't go by how I feel inside. (at least not only by that)
I'll get hit with the emotional hangover down the line but on any given day, I can feel fine acting out on a character defect.
I go by what I'm doing more than how I'm feeling. And, in the end, doing the right thing does make me feel better. Maybe not right away, but eventually.
It's more like "am I doing God's will today" rather than "do I feel good/bad/peacful/agitated...etc today". That's the main question I ask myself.
As an alcoholic I always want to 'feel good now'. To me, part of my spiritual growth is to get beyond that and try to just focus on doing the 'right thing now'.
You bring up a good point about people (Bill maybe ??) acting out on major defects and not drinking. But, to me that's like playing russian roulette. Just because one guy puts the gun to his head and pulls trigger doesn't make me want to try it next !!
Originally Posted by Cubile75
Is spiritual fitness, or lack of, always directly related to character defects? And, is working to correct those defects always the answer?
Mark
Mark
*Hooligan*
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Tenino, Wa
Posts: 94
Originally Posted by keithj
In reference to page 100, I simply follow the directions. No matter how secure I feel, or how long I've been sober, when I'm faced with a certain situation, I open that book to page 101 and follow the directions. I ask myself if I have good reason to be there. I follow the directions for how to conduct myself.
A part of my spiritual fitness is constant willingness to live by spiritual principles. When I think I don't have to do certain actions, my spiritual condition is already shaky.
I know that I do not know. I know that a year from now, or 10 years from now, I'll see things differently. If I'm in a state of already knowing, then I don't seek guidance. But if I'm in a state of knowing I don't know, I can let myself be guided. Spiritual fitness is a path, an action, not a place I rest.
And like Music said, you just know. I know because I feel that conscious contact. I hear the spiritual music in the world.
A part of my spiritual fitness is constant willingness to live by spiritual principles. When I think I don't have to do certain actions, my spiritual condition is already shaky.
I know that I do not know. I know that a year from now, or 10 years from now, I'll see things differently. If I'm in a state of already knowing, then I don't seek guidance. But if I'm in a state of knowing I don't know, I can let myself be guided. Spiritual fitness is a path, an action, not a place I rest.
And like Music said, you just know. I know because I feel that conscious contact. I hear the spiritual music in the world.
*Hooligan*
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Tenino, Wa
Posts: 94
I think this is def a personal thing. What we really have is a daily reprieve, contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. For me the bottom line always has been these few things - Am I doing the basics, praying, talking to other alcoholics, going to meetings, working with others(service work).
As long as I have done those things I have managed to do things and go places that are sometimes surprising even to me. The BB does talk about that point in all of our recovery where the only thing standing between us and that next drink is our HP, again I refer to the maintenance of our spiritual condition. "Maintenance" not perfection.
When I was 10 months sober, I needed a place to live. Some friends of mine that grew up with needed a roommate. So I decided to move in. My sponsor and others took bets on how soon I would get loaded, the general consensus was 2 mo. These guys drank and smoked weed and threw parties monthly. I'm sure part of it was out of spite against my sponsor, but I did the things I needed to do (as stated above, the basics) and guess what, I stayed sober despite my surroundings. I have been to many clubs, bars, weddings, and other places that involved lots of alcohol and have managed to stay sober, with the help of my HP.
My second new years sober a friend invited me down to San Francisco to see the Dead play their annual new years show at the Oakland coll. Good Idea I thought! So I get there and everyone is partying it up, even my friends. Alcohol, weed, mushrooms, you name it, it was being handed out like candy. I thought for sure I was going to get loaded. I called my sponsor, he said "You will be fine, call me tomorrow." Click he hung up. So I get in side the building and people are smoking weed all around me. I decide hey, I could get high and no one would know. I was getting really nervous. Then the thought occurred to me that I should walk around the Colosseum and check it out since I had never been there. I walked around a bit and saw lots of crazies and then decided to get something to eat. As I was heading up the stairs I look down and see the food court, I was going the wrong way. I decided to head up the stairs and see what was up there. When I got to the top I noticed a booth. It had yellow balloons and they had stickers on the table. They said things like "Still crazy after all this sobriety" and "another dopeless hope fiend". Come to find out it was a group of people in recovery that call themselves the Warf Rats. They travel with the dead and have meetings between every music set. I ended up going to like 4 or 5 meetings that night and it was the most amazing spiritual experience ever. Completely amazing.
I have a couple other big experiences like this, that I will share another time.
We have alcohol in our home, we eat where we want to eat, and enjoy time in places that many may not agree with. This is just my experience and may not work for everyone.
As long as I have done those things I have managed to do things and go places that are sometimes surprising even to me. The BB does talk about that point in all of our recovery where the only thing standing between us and that next drink is our HP, again I refer to the maintenance of our spiritual condition. "Maintenance" not perfection.
When I was 10 months sober, I needed a place to live. Some friends of mine that grew up with needed a roommate. So I decided to move in. My sponsor and others took bets on how soon I would get loaded, the general consensus was 2 mo. These guys drank and smoked weed and threw parties monthly. I'm sure part of it was out of spite against my sponsor, but I did the things I needed to do (as stated above, the basics) and guess what, I stayed sober despite my surroundings. I have been to many clubs, bars, weddings, and other places that involved lots of alcohol and have managed to stay sober, with the help of my HP.
My second new years sober a friend invited me down to San Francisco to see the Dead play their annual new years show at the Oakland coll. Good Idea I thought! So I get there and everyone is partying it up, even my friends. Alcohol, weed, mushrooms, you name it, it was being handed out like candy. I thought for sure I was going to get loaded. I called my sponsor, he said "You will be fine, call me tomorrow." Click he hung up. So I get in side the building and people are smoking weed all around me. I decide hey, I could get high and no one would know. I was getting really nervous. Then the thought occurred to me that I should walk around the Colosseum and check it out since I had never been there. I walked around a bit and saw lots of crazies and then decided to get something to eat. As I was heading up the stairs I look down and see the food court, I was going the wrong way. I decided to head up the stairs and see what was up there. When I got to the top I noticed a booth. It had yellow balloons and they had stickers on the table. They said things like "Still crazy after all this sobriety" and "another dopeless hope fiend". Come to find out it was a group of people in recovery that call themselves the Warf Rats. They travel with the dead and have meetings between every music set. I ended up going to like 4 or 5 meetings that night and it was the most amazing spiritual experience ever. Completely amazing.
I have a couple other big experiences like this, that I will share another time.
We have alcohol in our home, we eat where we want to eat, and enjoy time in places that many may not agree with. This is just my experience and may not work for everyone.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 4,682
For me, with what i have learned from my sponsor, being spiritually fit is a mixture of doing the things that i should be doing as outlined below and also working on character defects...at the very least be aware of the character defects and be willing to have them removed.
Your example of a guy who is racist and is not aware of it is not a shining example of being spiritually fit to me nor is the behaviour of Bill...which, the latter, is fine as i believe the program we work was sent to me by God through a man...and the program has been taught to me by God through the help of my sponsor who does have character defects after 23 years sobriety but knows what they are, is willing to have them removed and is actively working on them...as someone pointed out we are here to identify and work on our own character defects...if another person is happy to keep a few of their character defects or unwilling to look at them at all that is his concern, i certainly do not want to risk my sobriety for the sake of being willing, and indeed making an effort, to change:-)
Your example of a guy who is racist and is not aware of it is not a shining example of being spiritually fit to me nor is the behaviour of Bill...which, the latter, is fine as i believe the program we work was sent to me by God through a man...and the program has been taught to me by God through the help of my sponsor who does have character defects after 23 years sobriety but knows what they are, is willing to have them removed and is actively working on them...as someone pointed out we are here to identify and work on our own character defects...if another person is happy to keep a few of their character defects or unwilling to look at them at all that is his concern, i certainly do not want to risk my sobriety for the sake of being willing, and indeed making an effort, to change:-)
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 812
For myself, I think it is important to be mindful of defects, but also to be willing (like Keith said) to apply spiritual principles.
My mind can be very sneaky. It can tell me certain actions are "okay" and not really contrary to my morals. I have a naturally analytical mind--that's not a bad thing; I believe it's a positive thing when applied to the greater good. But sometimes it can get me into trouble.
For example, it has come to my attention that I have been stealing through my business in a very indirect way. I've been buying things and writing them off on my taxes because I can get away with it, even though they are not really tax write-offs. For months I've thought this was okay! And I would even convince myself that it wasn't really stealing. I told myself that buying books applied because I need to be well-read in my profession! So one day it just hits me out of the blue: It's stealing/cheating. Thankfully I have not filed, and I'm able to pull those receipts before doing so. I'm glad I became aware of this now. Not sure I'd want to make an amends to the IRS.
Then I was flirting with this man at my gym. I had convinced myself that it was okay because "nothing beyond flirtation was ever going to happen." Plus it kept me motivated. I looked forward to going to the gym. Once again, it hits me out of nowhere: Nope. Sorry. It's not okay. You're married and it's disrespectful to your spouse. It's also leading this other person on. How in the world did I ever assume that it was okay?! I suppose because it made me feel good and I liked the attention. In other words: Self-seeking. I honestly thought it was okay at the time.
Spiritual fitness is evidently a very slow process for me, but I am willing to work on it.
My mind can be very sneaky. It can tell me certain actions are "okay" and not really contrary to my morals. I have a naturally analytical mind--that's not a bad thing; I believe it's a positive thing when applied to the greater good. But sometimes it can get me into trouble.
For example, it has come to my attention that I have been stealing through my business in a very indirect way. I've been buying things and writing them off on my taxes because I can get away with it, even though they are not really tax write-offs. For months I've thought this was okay! And I would even convince myself that it wasn't really stealing. I told myself that buying books applied because I need to be well-read in my profession! So one day it just hits me out of the blue: It's stealing/cheating. Thankfully I have not filed, and I'm able to pull those receipts before doing so. I'm glad I became aware of this now. Not sure I'd want to make an amends to the IRS.
Then I was flirting with this man at my gym. I had convinced myself that it was okay because "nothing beyond flirtation was ever going to happen." Plus it kept me motivated. I looked forward to going to the gym. Once again, it hits me out of nowhere: Nope. Sorry. It's not okay. You're married and it's disrespectful to your spouse. It's also leading this other person on. How in the world did I ever assume that it was okay?! I suppose because it made me feel good and I liked the attention. In other words: Self-seeking. I honestly thought it was okay at the time.
Spiritual fitness is evidently a very slow process for me, but I am willing to work on it.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: The Swish Alps, SF CA
Posts: 2,144
I was in a meeting one time and this man was sharing, he started sharing about "stability" and he was flopping his hand all over the place like a wounded bird, I mean he was really waving that thing around, he said "as a physicist, the term 'stability' means that which does not overturn, or explode" he continued "my hand is waving around, but it doesn't flip over, I often feel my sobriety is like that, and that's what I mean when I have stability in my life"
I can be spiritually fit and be in a good mood, a bad mood, any mood under the sun, sure sometimes I can hear the music of the spheres and sunshine comes out of my butt, but what I have learned in sobriety is my emotional condition has little or nothing to do with reality, and on occasion, with my spiritual fitness.
Sometimes I think I am in a fit spiritual condition when the truth of the matter is I am starting a new relationship, or my financial situation is doing well, or any one of the "if only this then that's" in my life is being met.
For me, my spiritual condition is easy to maintain when all the outside stuff in my life are like ducks in a row, it's when the s*** hits the fan is when I get to see what my spiritual condition is really like, how do I handle defeat? frustrations? victory for that matter. Am I a gracious winner? loser? How do I act with my co-workers? friends? lovers? when things are bad? when things are good How am I in rush hour traffic?
Fit spiritual condition is one of those great topics like humility and honesty that leads people to talk way outside their experience, to yammer platitudes they learned from the BB while their spouse wants to kill them, as they cut people off in traffic, as they steal from work and have affairs. Those meetings always amuse me.
As far as my hidden defects go, "more will be revealed", I am constantly learning ways in which I am lying to myself so therefore others, I am constantly having a-ha moments, I am constantly saying "OOOOH, that's what that means", it's part of growth and when I do discover I have been completely full of merde, I don't beat myself up, I am thankful I learned so I don't have to do it any more.
It's easy for me to be spiritually fit in a vacuum, more difficult in platonic relationships, and very difficult if I am going to be completely honest in "love" based relationships, family, romantic etc, those take more awareness because I have some old patterns that I have to be diligent to be aware of...just takes a bit more work to have the same integrity and honesty with loved ones as complete strangers, because I am not invested in complete strangers I guess, that and we aren't playing out patterns and roles.
Life changes, so does my spiritual, physical and emotional condition, that's just how that is, however, as long as it remains "stable", as in doesn't overturn or explode, I'm cool, it's called "Life", being sober means I am awake for it and feel a full range of emotions, as far as going anywhere and doing anything, I just read those instructions, do I have hidden motives or agendas? Do I have a reason for being there?
The one thing I will NOT change however, is I bring my own ride to ANY slippery situation, not because I might drink, but because I have learned I HATE being trapped with drunk people, that especially includes family and The Holidays and going to see bands. It's not that I'll want to drink, it's I'll want to kill someone or poke myself in the eye with a sharp stick if I amtrapped with drunk people.
I can be spiritually fit and be in a good mood, a bad mood, any mood under the sun, sure sometimes I can hear the music of the spheres and sunshine comes out of my butt, but what I have learned in sobriety is my emotional condition has little or nothing to do with reality, and on occasion, with my spiritual fitness.
Sometimes I think I am in a fit spiritual condition when the truth of the matter is I am starting a new relationship, or my financial situation is doing well, or any one of the "if only this then that's" in my life is being met.
For me, my spiritual condition is easy to maintain when all the outside stuff in my life are like ducks in a row, it's when the s*** hits the fan is when I get to see what my spiritual condition is really like, how do I handle defeat? frustrations? victory for that matter. Am I a gracious winner? loser? How do I act with my co-workers? friends? lovers? when things are bad? when things are good How am I in rush hour traffic?
Fit spiritual condition is one of those great topics like humility and honesty that leads people to talk way outside their experience, to yammer platitudes they learned from the BB while their spouse wants to kill them, as they cut people off in traffic, as they steal from work and have affairs. Those meetings always amuse me.
As far as my hidden defects go, "more will be revealed", I am constantly learning ways in which I am lying to myself so therefore others, I am constantly having a-ha moments, I am constantly saying "OOOOH, that's what that means", it's part of growth and when I do discover I have been completely full of merde, I don't beat myself up, I am thankful I learned so I don't have to do it any more.
It's easy for me to be spiritually fit in a vacuum, more difficult in platonic relationships, and very difficult if I am going to be completely honest in "love" based relationships, family, romantic etc, those take more awareness because I have some old patterns that I have to be diligent to be aware of...just takes a bit more work to have the same integrity and honesty with loved ones as complete strangers, because I am not invested in complete strangers I guess, that and we aren't playing out patterns and roles.
Life changes, so does my spiritual, physical and emotional condition, that's just how that is, however, as long as it remains "stable", as in doesn't overturn or explode, I'm cool, it's called "Life", being sober means I am awake for it and feel a full range of emotions, as far as going anywhere and doing anything, I just read those instructions, do I have hidden motives or agendas? Do I have a reason for being there?
The one thing I will NOT change however, is I bring my own ride to ANY slippery situation, not because I might drink, but because I have learned I HATE being trapped with drunk people, that especially includes family and The Holidays and going to see bands. It's not that I'll want to drink, it's I'll want to kill someone or poke myself in the eye with a sharp stick if I amtrapped with drunk people.
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