earlybird

This is starting to sound like the joke thread that Irish suggested it may be. This is ridiculous. Three day "stints"????? In preparation for a 30 day abstinence "period" Giving your Seinfeld Character KRAMERESQE schemes cool names doesnt make them smart. Functional alcoholic isnt a "TYPE" .......its a phase. We all were functional for some time. I went to work all the time. I used to think to myself "I drink a hell of alot,..but, Im lucky or superman or something,...because I can still get up early and go to work and keep my job and even be considered a top employee" I called myself functional. Until I slipped into the NEXT phase. UNFUNCTIONAL. You will not be functional much longer. Your ability to reason mentally is going,...thats for sure. The rest isnt far behind. Stop the madness.

earlybird

you keep stressing "no beer".......could this mean that you are still drinking liquor??? I just find it interesting that you have a hard time saying "no drinking" Instead you say "no beer"


and ....dude,...."pepper" your week with patches of abstinence? Are ya kiddin' me??

earlybird

Oh and just so you know,...I realize that you are trying to make yourself sound "ON TOP' of things and going about this intelligently with all your "3.75 beers average a weeks" and your "now that I have 1.5 days abstinence's" and keeping a clipboard with BAC levels. We get it. What you DONT see,....is how all that makes you LOOK nuts. Nobody puts this kind of effort into making sure they can still drink unless they are full blown,....waaay out of control,..never look back,....extreme alcoholics. GET HELP. You cant do it this on your own. YOU cant. Some can. YOU cant.

lulu70

((((((((((Chip)))))))))) I posted early-on in this thread and then sort of stayed away. I have now re-read the whole thread and wanted to say I support you and what you are doing. I also support the intent of the other posters, although not necessarily the delivery.

When I was 23 I found myself homeless, jobless, carless, moneyless, and sick as a dog. I knew I had to do something, but I didn't know what. My parents took me in and got me to go to AA. I stayed clean and sober for about 6 months, got a job, cleaned up my life, etc. However, I wanted to be able to continue to go out, have a good time at the bars, basically live my life the way I used to only not drink. The AA program wouldn't let me do that. I slowly stopped going to meetings, started smoking pot on a regular basis, and eventually began drinking again.

I remained a basically "functional" alcoholic for quite a few years, although saying I was "functional" is probably pushing it. I did, however, finish college, have a child, get a good job, have a nice apartment, a car, etc. But my drinking just kept getting worse. I was NEVER a "drink everyday" type of alcoholic, but when I did drink, I was off to the races. For the last few years I planned to control my drinking everytime I drank. Occasionally I was successful, but most often I drank WAY TOO MUCH. That is why your moderation plan sounds so outrageous for me. It would never, ever work FOR ME.

What also wouldn't work was someone telling me what to do until I was ready to do whatever it took to stay sober. You may never get that desperate. In some ways, I hope you do because what you are doing right now sounds absolutely miserable. I have to aks you, though, are you really enjoying those few drinks you have?

All I can do is share my own experience with you. Over a year and a half ago I went out one Thursday night with the intention of having only a couple of beers with dinner. That turned in to an all out binge which ended with me showing up to work drunk at 6:45am. I was the director of a before- and after-school program for school-age children. I was taking care of other people's children and I showed up in a black out. I wish it hadn't taken that much to give me the wake-up call I needed, but it did. I ended up in treatment, started attending AA and working the steps and I have never looked back. Over 19 months now I have been clean and sober and it feels wonderful. Life is so much simpler now. All I have to do today is not take a drink. Most days I don't even thank about alcohol, and if I do, it is only to be grateful I don't have to drink anymore.

I don't know if you can find any similarities to your situation in my story, but I felt a need to share it. I KNOW you have to do what you have to do and come to your own solutions and conclusions. And I appreciate the fact that you are trying some different methods while also remaining open-minded. I also think you may not find abstinence as hard as you think. It is truly a "one day at a time" deal.

I'm thinking of you and wishing you peace--

2dayzmuse

Sometimes we have to experience things first hand before we can accept them. We can talk until we are blue in the face. Chip has to find out for himself whether or not he can succeed at his plan. You know and I know how rediculous this plan sounds for an alcoholic. I know because I attempted controlled drinking and it almost killed me. This may be the best, or the worst thing that has evered happened to Chip. Time will tell, but it appears he is determined to do it his way. I don't reccommend it, but I understand why he has to figure it out on his own. He is holding out on the hopes that we are all wrong and he will be successful. Okay, seeing is believing...

livenletlive

Big appreciation for lulu70. Absolutey and wonderfully spoken. I know it is as simple as sharing your experience and thats all you did here. I hope Chip reads your reply and lets it sink in.

chip

Dear Lulu70,
Thank you for telling your story. I see some similarities to my own story.

I was trying controlled drinking, and it wasn't very much fun. "cutting back" isn't the stragedy anymore. It's now been almost 48 hours since my last drink. By drink, I mean alchoholic beverage. I started yesterday with the intent of not drinking yesterday. I did the same today. I will tommorow.

Anybody who has followed this thread will know that I was planning on going with out a drink for 30 days....with the hopes of returning to "moderate drinking". I was planning to have my "start date" in November. My abstinence yesterday and today were suposed to be a "stint" to "warm me up" for the big 30 day marathon.

The plan is changed. I don't know about moderation at the end of my 30 days. I'm not going to think about it, but focus on getting through 30 days NOW. What happens to me, and how I feel will help me determine what my focus should be after 30 days.....and I am open to the idea of permanent abstinence.

After the discomfort I've been experienceing yesterday and today (headaches, chest pains, some sweating, cravings for beer, cravings for sugar, insomnia).....I've decided I don't want to go through with "quitting" again. I've got the ball rolling, and I should start to feel better in a day or so (god I hope so). I have a physical dependency, and going back to my "plan" of controlled drinking, only to quit again, seems like TORTURE.

So here it is, the new plan: I quit on Sept 24th. I will continue not drinking for 30 days and exercise 100% abstinence. If I have a drink during that period, I go back to ZERO days. If this happens, I will take it as a sign that abstinence may be a better option that moderation. During the 30 days, I will work on some sort of recovery program. I am open to any revocery program which is secular. I am seriously considering the benifits of permanent abstience

These are bold words.

So, I'd like to start posting on a new thread. Because my focus is now 100% abstinence for 30 days, I'm starting a thread called "trying abstinence". Please, Please stay with me. I need the support of this group here, and you've done so much for me. Lets stay in touch???
chip

Midas

Jeeze. Well Chip, I've been secretly camped in the rafters watching this thread from a safe distance for a few days, and I must say you deserve at least ONE small nod for being SO completely THOROUGH!!!

Despite the majority opinion becoming increasingly NEGATIVE, you persisted. Tenacity! Few people truly appreciate that character trait.

Frankly, I didn't think anyone (drunk or sober) could apply such intricate insanity in Over Analyzing Sh*t To Death better than myself.

Good Luck, Chip! I hope your decidedly unconventional plan works.

pedagogue

Good luck Chip!

-p

2dayzmuse

Good luck Chip. I look forward to following your new thread. I think your new consideration is a wonderful thing.

chip

Midas- I'm a very stuborn and resistant man. I also over analyze everything. I'm glad the group here helped me see the folly in my "plan". I'm so glad I found this website, and I'm glad I've decided not to drink. Thank you for the support.

Everyone Thanks, and I'll see you on the other thread (s) ??? (I hope)
chip

2dayzmuse

Yep, Chip. I'm heading for the rafters now...