I dont think I can go on
I am crying reading all your wonderful messages to me.
All of it is helping me so much and I appreciate all of you - your kind
words, your wisdom, and helping me realize that I can beat this.
This is going to be a tough road ahead, but I dont want to die.
Even though I have no friends to talk to, I have found my home with you.
All of it is helping me so much and I appreciate all of you - your kind
words, your wisdom, and helping me realize that I can beat this.
This is going to be a tough road ahead, but I dont want to die.
Even though I have no friends to talk to, I have found my home with you.
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Whitejay- I get it too. I finally had to just take that leap that there must be something better than what I was living. I had no idea what but I did indeed have to stop drinking that first day, pray, and I went to AA. It all saved my life.
Glad you are here- stay with us- and we can believe you are worth it til you do.
Glad you are here- stay with us- and we can believe you are worth it til you do.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2019
Location: Uk
Posts: 564
Sending you a warm hug, you can get through it my friend. We have all been in your position I promise you that. Keep close, keep posting and never be afraid to say exactly how you feel. We are all here for you. Xx
All of you have touched my heart.
Thank you, all of you for such kind words and love hugs.
Today is the worst day of my life. I sincerely didnt think I would live.
Maybe this is what it took to make me want to live and honor God for always being there for me.
You are my family now and I will always be here and hopefully one day when I am well I will be able to help the next alcoholic heal.
Love and Hugs
Thank you, all of you for such kind words and love hugs.
Today is the worst day of my life. I sincerely didnt think I would live.
Maybe this is what it took to make me want to live and honor God for always being there for me.
You are my family now and I will always be here and hopefully one day when I am well I will be able to help the next alcoholic heal.
Love and Hugs
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 2,937
Hi
If giving up drink was easy, places like here or AA, or rehabs or SMART would not exist.
I didn't get it straight away.
I got sick and tired of feeling sick and tired.
The guilt, shame and secrets were overwhelming.
I remember the vicious cycle of waking up, scared to open my eyes, throwing up in the shower, struggling for the next few hours, then having a drink to end my misery.
Then the whole cycle started again.
For me I had to make changes.
No more sitting on the sofa every night, drinking myself to death.
There had to be more to life and there is.
For me I liked the assurance that as long as i did not pick up a drink, I would never have more episodes to feel ashamed of.
I took it one day at a time.
My only goal was making it to bed sober.
If someone asked if I would be drinking at their party/wedding/family dinner/ Christmas do or NYE partyI simply said I don't know. Im not thinking about that now, I will cross that bridge when I come to it.
I never made any big announcements about not drinking.
As time went on my confidence grew and I became stronger.
That was 8 years ago.
One day at a time.
I feel I have 2 families - my real family and my family here at SR.
Its not easy and I had to face some tough times without turning to drink.
I remember sleeping with my laptop on my bed because it felt like I was only a mouse click away from people who wanted the best for me, who cared, who never judged.
As Dee would always say - do you have a robust plan in place to help you?
Are you reaching out too AA for support?
I really do wish you the best xx
If giving up drink was easy, places like here or AA, or rehabs or SMART would not exist.
I didn't get it straight away.
I got sick and tired of feeling sick and tired.
The guilt, shame and secrets were overwhelming.
I remember the vicious cycle of waking up, scared to open my eyes, throwing up in the shower, struggling for the next few hours, then having a drink to end my misery.
Then the whole cycle started again.
For me I had to make changes.
No more sitting on the sofa every night, drinking myself to death.
There had to be more to life and there is.
For me I liked the assurance that as long as i did not pick up a drink, I would never have more episodes to feel ashamed of.
I took it one day at a time.
My only goal was making it to bed sober.
If someone asked if I would be drinking at their party/wedding/family dinner/ Christmas do or NYE partyI simply said I don't know. Im not thinking about that now, I will cross that bridge when I come to it.
I never made any big announcements about not drinking.
As time went on my confidence grew and I became stronger.
That was 8 years ago.
One day at a time.
I feel I have 2 families - my real family and my family here at SR.
Its not easy and I had to face some tough times without turning to drink.
I remember sleeping with my laptop on my bed because it felt like I was only a mouse click away from people who wanted the best for me, who cared, who never judged.
As Dee would always say - do you have a robust plan in place to help you?
Are you reaching out too AA for support?
I really do wish you the best xx
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 3,293
I am very sorry to hear you are going through such a tough time. I don't know if this helps, but I've been a few tough times where I felt all was lost and there was no point in even trying to make things better. But it was in those times when I found an inner strength that I didn't know I had. I had to reach deep down to find it, but I did and I got through those seemingly hopeless situations. It's kinda like getting a second wind when you feel like you are done. I'm sure you have that second wind in you. Just don't give up and keep trying. You can do this. John
Member
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 2,583
You are worth it and you are not alone.
I wish I could give you a big hug right now and tell you it will all be ok because it will be. I was where you are now 18 months ago. I had also been trying and failing to quit. You can do this. Stay close and keep posting.
I will Keep you in my prayers tonight
🙏❤🙏❤
I wish I could give you a big hug right now and tell you it will all be ok because it will be. I was where you are now 18 months ago. I had also been trying and failing to quit. You can do this. Stay close and keep posting.
I will Keep you in my prayers tonight
🙏❤🙏❤
Booze debilitates us in our day to day lives and on top of that it corrodes our self respect but you do have self worth and evidently enough courage to post about your struggles on these threads. That's a big deal. If you can get on top of this, and you can, you will feel really good about yourself. Sending positive vibes your way.
It's hard to feel any self-worth when you're drinking. Drinking robs us of our self respect. But if you stay sober, you can begin to feel better and more positive.
Stick with us and post often. I felt hopeless too, but it's been almost 10 yrs since I felt that horrible. If I can do it, so can you.
Stick with us and post often. I felt hopeless too, but it's been almost 10 yrs since I felt that horrible. If I can do it, so can you.
I missed the thread earlier too, Whitejay.
I drank 30 yrs. & was brought to my knees, just like you have been. When I found SR I really didn't know what to expect. I never imagined people would be so encouraging and kind. Everyone understood, no one judged. I gathered the strength to let go of alcohol and become my authentic self. There is no doubt you can do this. Life will be so much better when you're free.
I drank 30 yrs. & was brought to my knees, just like you have been. When I found SR I really didn't know what to expect. I never imagined people would be so encouraging and kind. Everyone understood, no one judged. I gathered the strength to let go of alcohol and become my authentic self. There is no doubt you can do this. Life will be so much better when you're free.
Worth is inherent.
I can't remove your worth
You can't remove my worth.
I can't remove my worth.
You can't remove your worth.
I tried for 29 years to change.
Then I got it.
Then I lost it
I'm going to get it back.
Change is possible, therefore hope is reasonable.
Let's do this.
Whitejay, it lies. The addiction lies and the depression lies. What you are feeling now is the reason I had to get away from it. Anywhere but there.
Jay, you are right where you are supposed to be. Thank God that he has provided you with this sense of desperation without killing you. Then honor God by doing something about it. And remember you can’t quit forever today. Just make it through today. Keep the deseperation, remember this pain and do it again tomorrow.
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