sweetichick1

Hi everyone. My appointment with my psychiatrist went for only five minutes and mainly focused around continuing not to drink.He said I will end. Up in a nursing home. A very scary thought.

DontRemember

That's what your focus should 100% be on; not drinking. I'm not going to speculate what was said during the "5 minutes", but will say I had to keep fully focused on my not drinking no matter what the past, present or future had/has in store. I simply don't have to drink over anything,ever, became my mindset after some decent sober time.

sweetichick1

I am just taking it one day at a time

Delilah1

Just keep focusing on the present, and making the nest positive choice for your mental and physical health. No matter how difficult the situation do not let alcohol become an option.

I know how difficult it is when parents are sick. I am 48, so close to your age and I have lost both parents. When my dad died nine years ago I spent most of the wake and the funeral drinking, it was a blur, and all I did was put off my grief. When my mom died in December I had just about three years sober. Drinking wasn’t even a thought, I cried a lot, and had a few episodes where breathing wasn’t easy, but I got through the wake and funeral, and continued to feel sad, but that’s okay. It is okay to feel sad, scared, uncomfortable, angry... over the past three and a half years I have developed healthy coping skills.

I walk, do breathing, sometimes I close the door and just allow myself to be sad or angry, then I do some breathing and get back to focusing on my next positive step.

You are doing this Sweeti, and I have a really strong feeling this will be the time you make sobriety stick.

sweetichick1

Atm I am trying to put my mum out of my mind and focus on sobriety. My condolences to you for losing your parents. I am glad I am not the only one who feels uncomfortable and sad. My parents are only 74 but still in the age bracket. I will try some deep breathing. My feelings are all over the place today. I don’t know how I would react if she dies. My aunt is 5 years older and is supporting me. She is happy with my progress. Thanks for sharing your story and what you did to cope. It means a lot

Verdantia

Hi Sweeti--it is excellent that you're focusing on your sobriety above everything else. One day at a time is a great plan. Wishing you peace and comfort. Happy belated birthday, also. Mine is 7/11.

Dee74

Happy bday to you too Verdantia

D

sweetichick1

Thanks for your support. Verdantia. Happy birthday to you too.

gypsytears

Happy Belated Birthday Sweeti. I notice you haven’t been active since yesterday morning (USA time). I hope all is well and you’ve had another sober day.

sweetichick1

Got an absolutely agonising ear infection. Unfortunately I drank alcohol again. The doctors are treating it. I thought it was just wax in my ear. Today is Friday I need to go back Monday. Plus I have an infection on my face. All of this was too overwhelming. I am going to try to sleep. If my ear lets me

sweetichick1

I have not had an ear infection since being a child. So didn’t recognise the signs. I have been suffering for two weeks.

Dee74

I;m sorry for your pain.

I'm sorry you didn't post about it tho sweetichick - we could have given you support and advice.

Ear infections are painful - but so's continuing to drink.

You need to get to a point where you instinctively seek help cos you want to stay sober...not hiding away from the support you have cos you've decided to drink.

You need to get to a point where choosing to drink is not your first impulse to any kind of pain or crisis.

How do you think you might do that?

D

sweetichick1

Welll the first thing I should have done is buy Panadol. I can’t even hear out of my right ear. The second thing I should have done is get to a doctor much sooner.. the third thing is listening to my dad. He is a born high achieving. I can’t keep up with him. All he does is put me down. I need to put plans in place how to deal with both my parents. Aa is not an answer for me. 90% are unsuccessful. I need to face up to reality. I made it to 52. Walking everyday will surely help. I want to be one of those who make it.

sweetichick1

I got painkillers from the servo. I needed petrol anyway. Who cares if I was over the limit it was only around the corner

Delilah1

I’m really sorry you’re drinking again, adding painkillers sounds like a very bad idea. I am glad you made it home without hurting someone else, or yourself.

I hope you will take some time to think about this when you’re sober Sweeti.

Dee74

Cmon sweetichick....

You know that it doesn't matter how far the drive is if you've been drinking,

Even if you don't hurt yourself or someone else you could get pulled over and lose your licence. How would you get around then?

D

Newbeginning421

While I am not in AA, statistics can be quite misleading as many people are court ordered and since AA is the most well known program there are a good amount of people that maybe not as serious about their recovery and stop by once or twice. Compared to other less known programs that you have to seek out more. These two factors bring down AA's recovery numbers but for those serious about recovery including AA do recover. Life is not all roses and sunshine running away from pain with alcohol does nothing to solve the problem. Stop making excuses to drink, talk with your psychologist and mental health team and work through your issues. It really is that simple just don't drink if you are serious about not wanting to end up in a nursing home.

kk1k5x

There's a saying: the swinging space for your fists ends where other people's noses start.

Whatever problem or crises and however overwhelming is NOT an excuse to endanger other people. And then be cavalier about it? That's just wrong on so many levels.

The timeline you provided suggests that you: 1) found out you had a bad ear infection (which is stupid painful, I know), 2) drank some alcohol and 3) at some point after 1) and 2) decided to DRIVE to get painkillers? Can't turn back time, but how does that even make sense? Why not get the painkillers and petrol first if you were sure you're gonna drink anyways.

Society generally accepts people wanting to ruin their own lives using whatever methods they choose (this is pretty much why each and everyone of us is on this forum). That is - as long as you do not harm or endanger others in that process. That's why laws exist and people ought to consider abiding by them. Your licence should be taken away if you are so blatantly indifferent about the wellbeing of others.

Think long and hard about that after the booze fog clears. And then stay sober by whatever means necessary. Good luck.

tomsteve

of course ya drank again,sweeti. alcoholism isnt being treated.
rationalizing driving after drinking-ya need your license revoked .
its an ear infection thats being treated-you turned it into drama to drink. do you have any idea how many people on this rock have an ear infection today? prolly a few million.
accountability- where is it,sweeti?
sittin in the garage all day wont make you a car.
your statistics about aa are malarkey and another excuse to not be accountable for recovery. 100% of the people that work ANY program are successful.
even if your stats werent malarkey,10% success is 10% better than what ya have now,eh? ya have 100% chance of dieing if ya sit on yer ass and continue making excuses.
now, go look back throught your posts under your last un and see the praise ya gave aa.
your excuses may work for/on some, but as ive said,not me. dam straight im gonna call ya on it. im not into digging graves by joining in the pity party. i prefer to help build a ladder.

if there is a better solution, quit screwing around and find it. you can sit in front of your tv dieing or you can get yer ass into action for recovery. youre worth it but none of us can nor will do the work.

gypsytears

Drinking over an ear infection? That is the most ridiculous excuse I’ve heard on the forums.

Getting pain killers after seeing the doctor and being treated for the ear infection? Even more absurd.

Driving drunk? Even just around the corner? That’s criminal. And selfish. It’s too bad you weren’t pulled over and arrested. Maybe that might have woken you up but I seriously doubt even losing your license would make much difference to you. Injuring or even killing someone with your utter disregard for others probably wouldn’t either.

I’ve been hoping and praying... and really rooting for you to find happiness through sobriety Sweeti but you refusal to help yourself is making it pretty clear that you don’t really want help.

Please surrender your license so that you don’t hurt anyone else while you continue to choose to hurt yourself.