Fourth of July Celebrations - without alcohol? Is that possible? Weekenders 04July - 08July 2019
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 1,408
hey there everyone! Have to admit, the AV is having a FOMO moment. I remember this time last year I felt particularily ticked off at all the "fun" going on around me while I sat here on my feet.
Of course the one small detail was that I had relapsed by then and was fighting withdrawal. This time I have just over 6 months solid, but I wish we could just get it over with. I still have 3 more days off. I want to celebrate it without having to hear the fireworks and a bunch of people's ooohs and ahhhs. lol
Of course the one small detail was that I had relapsed by then and was fighting withdrawal. This time I have just over 6 months solid, but I wish we could just get it over with. I still have 3 more days off. I want to celebrate it without having to hear the fireworks and a bunch of people's ooohs and ahhhs. lol
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
I'm in between "events" this afternoon and wanted to touch base as the parade ended up being somewhat stressful in a lot of ways.
I was going to hit up a food festival this afternoon but there were so many people at the parade, I need to decompress before the fireworks. I'm going to fix some food and see if I even feel like going. I'm just not as willing to be crushed with people as I used to be. Four hours was plenty!
Thanks for saying hi, MidnightBlue.
I was going to hit up a food festival this afternoon but there were so many people at the parade, I need to decompress before the fireworks. I'm going to fix some food and see if I even feel like going. I'm just not as willing to be crushed with people as I used to be. Four hours was plenty!
Thanks for saying hi, MidnightBlue.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 850
It'll be okay. Today is just a day. There's nothing about today that would make risking everything to have a drink worthwhile. Because it's never just one, and you're just picking up that shovel to dig that hole again. Hang in there.
I had a nice time with my family today and then went to a friend's to play on a slip n slide like we were ten again, and it was rad. It's been so hot here so it was great to chill in some water. I have plans to go to the pool tomorrow if the weather cooperates. I hope it does cuz I haven't been to a pool probably since before I went to college.
It would have been so easy to drink today. There were a few moments when I was upstairs at my mom's and watching the cooking and the wine and liquor was just out on the table and it would have been so easy to just chug a whole bunch from the bottle real quick when no one else was around. It almost felt surreal, idk. I felt strong in that I wasn't going to do it, and couldn't picture myself moving towards it, picking up the bottle and drinking it. The taste probably would have made me gag anyway. I kept thinking about my AA group and how I would have let them all down, and also let all of you down. It was a very strange feeling. I can't explain it. I definitely had FOMO and I really need to figure out why. One drink never did a single thing for me and I never ever wanted one drink. Ever. I had my sparkling water and my head is clear and I feel good. I would have gotten drunk and then probably driven myself home, which is despicable. Luckily these feelings only come around on days like Memorial Day and the 4th, etc. I hardly ever think about alcohol anymore during my daily life.
Admittedly it was a stupid thing to be so close to alcohol multiple times today but as I was driving home I was so so grateful I didn't drink and am sober now. My day off tomorrow is going to be so restful and wonderful. I dunno. I had a great day but I need to take some time and process how it was to be so close and not do it. Stupid. I made it tho. Not looking to do that again soon tho.
Anyway. Idk if any of this made sense but I just needed to get it all out. Good night everyone.
I had a nice time with my family today and then went to a friend's to play on a slip n slide like we were ten again, and it was rad. It's been so hot here so it was great to chill in some water. I have plans to go to the pool tomorrow if the weather cooperates. I hope it does cuz I haven't been to a pool probably since before I went to college.
It would have been so easy to drink today. There were a few moments when I was upstairs at my mom's and watching the cooking and the wine and liquor was just out on the table and it would have been so easy to just chug a whole bunch from the bottle real quick when no one else was around. It almost felt surreal, idk. I felt strong in that I wasn't going to do it, and couldn't picture myself moving towards it, picking up the bottle and drinking it. The taste probably would have made me gag anyway. I kept thinking about my AA group and how I would have let them all down, and also let all of you down. It was a very strange feeling. I can't explain it. I definitely had FOMO and I really need to figure out why. One drink never did a single thing for me and I never ever wanted one drink. Ever. I had my sparkling water and my head is clear and I feel good. I would have gotten drunk and then probably driven myself home, which is despicable. Luckily these feelings only come around on days like Memorial Day and the 4th, etc. I hardly ever think about alcohol anymore during my daily life.
Admittedly it was a stupid thing to be so close to alcohol multiple times today but as I was driving home I was so so grateful I didn't drink and am sober now. My day off tomorrow is going to be so restful and wonderful. I dunno. I had a great day but I need to take some time and process how it was to be so close and not do it. Stupid. I made it tho. Not looking to do that again soon tho.
Anyway. Idk if any of this made sense but I just needed to get it all out. Good night everyone.
Last edited by dpac414; 07-04-2019 at 08:53 PM. Reason: added a lil more
Magsie
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,683
Morning Weekenders
Sometimes a good night’s sleep can really help, waking up the next morning knowing you didn’t take that drink, but played the tape forward and saw the repercussions of that one drink.
When I stopped drinking for good I kept away from booze, from supermarket aisles with booze, from programmes on tv, (especially the cookery ones, they seem to cook with so much of it!) from my favourite films that I used to like to drink to. I knew my triggers and until I was strong enough I kept well away from them.
One of my favourite times, newly sober, was New Year’s Day, in the morning when the shops opened! I walked around Tesco supermarket happy I was sober, the shop was deserted save for the staff and an handful of shoppers.
It was nice not to have to eat mints in case anyone could smell booze on me, it was nice to drive without wondering if I was over the limit the next morning on my way to work. It was nice to hold my head up knowing I hadn’t drunken argued with my husband.
All the little things add up to give me freedom. Freedom from the crutch of alcohol.
I learned to respect myself again, little by little.
It well worth the time to have a plan and keep sober and get your life back.
Sometimes a good night’s sleep can really help, waking up the next morning knowing you didn’t take that drink, but played the tape forward and saw the repercussions of that one drink.
When I stopped drinking for good I kept away from booze, from supermarket aisles with booze, from programmes on tv, (especially the cookery ones, they seem to cook with so much of it!) from my favourite films that I used to like to drink to. I knew my triggers and until I was strong enough I kept well away from them.
One of my favourite times, newly sober, was New Year’s Day, in the morning when the shops opened! I walked around Tesco supermarket happy I was sober, the shop was deserted save for the staff and an handful of shoppers.
It was nice not to have to eat mints in case anyone could smell booze on me, it was nice to drive without wondering if I was over the limit the next morning on my way to work. It was nice to hold my head up knowing I hadn’t drunken argued with my husband.
All the little things add up to give me freedom. Freedom from the crutch of alcohol.
I learned to respect myself again, little by little.
It well worth the time to have a plan and keep sober and get your life back.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London, England
Posts: 7,060
Morning,
Water Ox I hope you are feeling much better today. Nice to wake up with no regrets even if things were a little dull for you yesterday.
Well done Dpac, being around alcohol can be so difficult and you got through!
When I have been in similar situations I feel almost dizzy with the inner turmoil, having that one thing which has dominated so much of my life within grabbing distance. A love hate relationship, wanting yet not wanting...oh so complicated.
So my Dad is going home today. Obviously I am pleased but also worried for him. He wants to try and return to normal (and ignore the fact that he almost died) and carry on. I have done what I can, he is a independent, stubborn man but also not surprisingly, scared of being alone.
Water Ox I hope you are feeling much better today. Nice to wake up with no regrets even if things were a little dull for you yesterday.
Well done Dpac, being around alcohol can be so difficult and you got through!
When I have been in similar situations I feel almost dizzy with the inner turmoil, having that one thing which has dominated so much of my life within grabbing distance. A love hate relationship, wanting yet not wanting...oh so complicated.
So my Dad is going home today. Obviously I am pleased but also worried for him. He wants to try and return to normal (and ignore the fact that he almost died) and carry on. I have done what I can, he is a independent, stubborn man but also not surprisingly, scared of being alone.
Ocean Lover!
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: You know nothing Jon Snow - UK
Posts: 2,604
Morning All! Dpac hit the nail on the head for me when I get that “I just want one drink”, In the final few years of active drinking I never ever just had one. I wanted it all, and when it ran out I would go and get more till I passed out. Every. Single. Time. I try and keep that at the front of my mind when the “just one” thoughts try and take over.
I have Monday off work so looking forward to a chilled weekend. I need to spend some time writing out what’s going on in my head and try to understand what is really going on in there. I have been really pissed off all week, getting annoyed about stuff I shouldn’t and holding on to negativity. I do know there is an element of my ego running the show at the moment and that is part of the cause. Still, I am aware I need to stop the rot and take some action, what and how I don’t know yet but not dealing with these things never worked for me in the past and I don’t want to ever go back to that.
Picking up Max the kitten in the morning! Got a brand new huge cat tree I need to build tonight and got to get his room ready. I’m excited but also nervous how Alfie is going to feel, I hope they’ll be friends but cats will do whatever they want lol xx
I have Monday off work so looking forward to a chilled weekend. I need to spend some time writing out what’s going on in my head and try to understand what is really going on in there. I have been really pissed off all week, getting annoyed about stuff I shouldn’t and holding on to negativity. I do know there is an element of my ego running the show at the moment and that is part of the cause. Still, I am aware I need to stop the rot and take some action, what and how I don’t know yet but not dealing with these things never worked for me in the past and I don’t want to ever go back to that.
Picking up Max the kitten in the morning! Got a brand new huge cat tree I need to build tonight and got to get his room ready. I’m excited but also nervous how Alfie is going to feel, I hope they’ll be friends but cats will do whatever they want lol xx
Sober-T- Dragon
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: Manitoba
Posts: 8,761
Originally Posted by Mags1 
...It was nice to hold my head up....
I've noticed somthing else in my self recently. My brain seems to be functioning better. I've always had really bad problems with recall, especially short term memory. I still have those problems but I've noticed little improvements, like crosswords are suddenly easier. Also, when my wife and I are reading thru the clues and we return to one, I can recall the clue with out looking it up again.
So Cool.
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