DriGuy

You don't have to be religious to tap the joy and happiness of those AA members who have committed to sobriety. Like you, I'm not very religious, actually not at all. I have no faith or spirituality. I didn't buy the entire package. It's fine if you do, but you can utilize any of the parts and combine them with other resources like your apps, SR, or outside counselors, whatever works. Reword the steps into something that makes more sense to you. They are handy common sense directions where someone added a god to give it more spiritual punch.

Whatever approach you use, you can expect common hurdles, and common experiences:

• You're going to do battle with cravings at first. There's no magic pill here. We all go through it.
  
  
• Cravings will diminish. Committing to post craving abstinence is important. This is not a temporary life change. It's for real and forever.
  
  
• You will be tempted later, not by cravings, but by nonsense from your subconscious desires shrouded in thoughts that you can drink because you are now feeling normal. Don't respond to those.
  
  
• You will eventually wonder at times, who that person you thought you were really was. You will not feel like the same person. But you will still be an alcoholic, albeit one that no longer drinks.

In spite of AA's religious foundation, which many prefer to call spiritual, I needed the fellowship. Not everyone does, but in retrospect it seems like talking with other alcoholics was critical in my case. I was happy to tap that part of the resource. I was inspired by the success of certain members that made an impression on me. It helped.

abgator

Oh I've been through it all. Docs, sleep studies, apnea tests, etc. The only explanation anyone ever comes up with is "stress".

abgator

Dr, been there and done that. Some of that is how I relapsed the first time.

I'll go back to AA when I don't have my kid. Just keep looking for the group that feels right. I definitely know I didn't like the first couple groups. I agree that fellowship will be important for me. The first month I can handle easy because it's new and fresh in my mind.

Caprice6

DG - there was a quote from you I really liked and almost switched my signature to it, giving you credit cuz I felt and saw it the same way. It had to do with recovery and life without alcohol as a pleasant/positive experience rather than a struggle.

Now, here I do not see it the same way. The first point being that there are various anti-craving meds (I have campral coupled with naltrexone I take that seem to finally help in the meantime - magic pills.

The second being, that for me, I do not defy or consider myself as an alcoholic (even if I'm only a month sober, perhaps too soon), and I will eventually quit counting the days even though subconsciously I know my sobriety date to April 15th, 2019). To me, there are other things which are greater hurdles and a life to live than to be conscious of alcohol on a daily basis. It's erased, I do not need it to live, I do not want it as a form of ''escape'' anymore, which I regret almost every time I have turned to it. To me, it's put on a permanent black list, and what else is there or new.

I believe in your third point though. There will certainly be or come those moments, but as it's not an option, I will look for something else. No one is gonna put a gun to my head. In that case, ok then.

DriGuy

I've heard of these, although you may be the first person I know who has used them. If a significant wide scale breakthrough comes in treating alcoholism, I'd put my money on the medical community, so these drugs may be part of some future solution if something like that ever happens. Now for me, dealing with cravings was possibly my biggest hurdle. Once I got through that, I was confident I was going to make it. So the drugs you are taking, which no one ever heard of when I quit, may be a major part of the solution.

Absolutely. I see sobriety as a means to an end, not the end in itself. There is a wild variety of things to do and goals to achieve beyond meetings and focusing on alcoholism. I don't think recovery has to be that after so many years. Putting those things aside and moving on is progress in my opinion. I do define myself as an alcoholic, although feeling like an alcoholic is not part of it. That pretty much ended when I quit drinking.

Even those moments become fewer with time, and I don't see myself seduced by them. They scared me early on, but like you, drinking just wasn't an option. Some alcoholics with long term sobriety have succumbed. I don't know why it happens, but I believe there is a logical explanation, and probably the relapse could have been avoided.

A friend of mine went back out after 20 years, and ended up dead three years later. What I observed was simple and classic. I saw a person struggling with life, trying to control everything, often when there was no need or purpose to control. He got to a point where he was so angry at the world, he no longer cared. He allowed himself to self destruct. It was a horrible thing to watch him making one bad decision after another and constantly acting irrationally. It was bizarre. It was hard to believe it could actually happen. But I watched it.

August252015

^^^DriGuy, you "know" me and I've taken the meds. Antabuse is the one that can kill you if you drink on it (which I did my first time "using it"- ha) and I did take it for the first 90 days of my sobriety. As an additional tool. Campral and naltrexone were no use to me bc I just kept drinking as normal...I believe there is no magic pill and no cure - maybe one day, but for me I can't imagine it would ever be worth the risk it didn't cure me!!

DriGuy

Alcoholism is complex and drinking to avoid cravings is not the only reason alcoholics drink, so Campral and Naltrexone are only aids not cures, a point which eluded me. And that's a significant point. Medical science still has a long way to go in solving the problem.

Caprice6

August - the Naltrexone is supposed to eliminate any of the effects alcohol has on you, any buzz. It didn't quite help with the cravings (as it should) but I haven't personally tested it drinking. Again, perhaps the dosage wasn't high enough. Ideally, my doctor said to take it every 24 hours and again (my dosage could be higher) to take another when a craving hit. The campral was also added, and on it, you can still drink and feel the effects without getting sick, but together, they have improved the cravings, with which without, I agree with DG would be the greatest hurdle.

DG - sorry about your friend. I know of a guy from the hard core alcoholics at the park who passed away recently too due to failing organs in his early 50's. Then heard about another through someone's brother. It's really a shame.

abgator - if it's stress, then therapy (individual and/or group) may help. Try to be open and collaborate with them. Talk it out, find tools and resources to help you cope, exercise is always good too.

Bobbieka

Campral and Naltrexone helped me when I was ready to quit. When I wasn't, I just didn't take them if I wanted to drink. You're right, no magic pill. They proved very valuable when I got serious though.

Caprice6

same here Bobbieka, I was also on dissulfiram, and stopped taking it because I was planning on drinking again...I stopped the naltrexone too, it was planned.
Now, even when cravings hit (or not) I just take them, except not the antabuse cuz they have 0 effect on curbing cravings.
I've never mixed any of them with alcohol cuz I just take my doctors word for it, they could be placebos for all I know lol, but since adding the campral, I have noticed that the cravings had noticeably subsided.

August252015

Yep, Caprice- multiple things those drugs can do for plenty of folks - I certainly didn't give them a chance to work bc however much it was, I was still trekking along to my highest consumption point!

abgator

That's the plan. I exercise plenty, it's not that. We'll get to the bottom of it one day. I'll settle for being sober for now.

Caprice6

Abgator - I'm sure that will help. They usually prescribe the trazadone after quitting because people who've been drinking for a while and quit experience insomnia down the line for a few months.

August - I understand that, I'm grateful to live where I do where the pills are covered (apart from antabuse). Therapy and programs are all covered too cuz mental health is considered into health care. There shouldn't be any financial excuse for Canadians.

Happyvale

Great thread.