Oldmates third time lucky
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 206
thankyou kindly guys, tomorrow will be day 1 again.
a lot of sh1t has happened and i had to use alcohol to cope.
saw my doctor this morning and got 50 valium and some lovan.
after a long discussion and me explainning how ive exhausted all
the other possibility's we both agree its time for me to try
some meds again for depression and anxiety. the lovan.
My anxiety is becoming debilitating and i need to really try
and sort it out. I'm reluctant to take meds for things like this
as i have seen and been in some bad experiences with them.
espewxcially anti anxiee stuff. Zanax. yuk..... not for me anyway
lovan is quite safe and something i had in highschool so it should be sweet.
the valium is only for withdrawls/emergencys.
just ended a six year relationship too so thats been fun to deal with.
Without being rude to any ladies on here i am completely turned off women,
i wont even repeat what ive had happen to me.
But.... im sure we want a bit of goss so....
While ive been struggling with my addiction and whatnot
it turned out my better half was going to a womens group
sharing all my "problems" with 150 strangers and getting
a pat on the back for being a great partner.
I think, as ive stated in this thread, i spent a lot of time unsupported and alone
and even doing substances to escape feelings this person gave me. While they
get a good pat on the back.
Anyway i think 6 years was enough time investing in that and
its time for me to think about myself. she had it good too.
although i did drink i never cheated on her or raised a hand to her and i was available always. Anyway.
Moving on.
tomorrow should be fun. Im going to go back on stage doing stand up again too.
should be good.
thanks again to everyone and i hope your all going ok.
a lot of sh1t has happened and i had to use alcohol to cope.
saw my doctor this morning and got 50 valium and some lovan.
after a long discussion and me explainning how ive exhausted all
the other possibility's we both agree its time for me to try
some meds again for depression and anxiety. the lovan.
My anxiety is becoming debilitating and i need to really try
and sort it out. I'm reluctant to take meds for things like this
as i have seen and been in some bad experiences with them.
espewxcially anti anxiee stuff. Zanax. yuk..... not for me anyway
lovan is quite safe and something i had in highschool so it should be sweet.
the valium is only for withdrawls/emergencys.
just ended a six year relationship too so thats been fun to deal with.
Without being rude to any ladies on here i am completely turned off women,
i wont even repeat what ive had happen to me.
But.... im sure we want a bit of goss so....
While ive been struggling with my addiction and whatnot
it turned out my better half was going to a womens group
sharing all my "problems" with 150 strangers and getting
a pat on the back for being a great partner.
I think, as ive stated in this thread, i spent a lot of time unsupported and alone
and even doing substances to escape feelings this person gave me. While they
get a good pat on the back.
Anyway i think 6 years was enough time investing in that and
its time for me to think about myself. she had it good too.
although i did drink i never cheated on her or raised a hand to her and i was available always. Anyway.
Moving on.
tomorrow should be fun. Im going to go back on stage doing stand up again too.
should be good.
thanks again to everyone and i hope your all going ok.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,443
Hi oldmate
I 'had' to, too cos it was the only tool I had.
I think its time you found some other ways to cope, oldmate.
Drinking is like pouring petrol on a bonfire to try and put it out.
All I'll say about your relationship ending is that I see my past relationships very differently now. You might too with some more recovery time.
In any case, sounds like with your relationship ending you have an opportunity to focus solely on yourself and your recovery for a bit, so I'd take that chance and run with it.
D
a lot of sh1t has happened and i had to use alcohol to cope.
I think its time you found some other ways to cope, oldmate.
Drinking is like pouring petrol on a bonfire to try and put it out.
All I'll say about your relationship ending is that I see my past relationships very differently now. You might too with some more recovery time.
In any case, sounds like with your relationship ending you have an opportunity to focus solely on yourself and your recovery for a bit, so I'd take that chance and run with it.
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 206
knew youd grab that.
I didnt have to do anything. What i did feel i had to do was do something to stop the panick attack. Had something else worked or been available i wouldnt
have gone to the shop.
Now i dont have a license its actually a bit of an effort to get to there.
you are absolutely right, i need other ways to cope, hence all the
effort to do it all again.
I'm not going to be sweating and having heart palpitations tomorrow and
everything else that goes with it because i think it's a fun thing to do.
Unfortunatly i have seen things you wouldnt even believe
and have massive underlying issues as a consequence. I used
to prepare dead bodies for viewing, that wasnt much fun.
i'm not having a go at you dee, apologies if i'm too brash
I didnt have to do anything. What i did feel i had to do was do something to stop the panick attack. Had something else worked or been available i wouldnt
have gone to the shop.
Now i dont have a license its actually a bit of an effort to get to there.
you are absolutely right, i need other ways to cope, hence all the
effort to do it all again.
I'm not going to be sweating and having heart palpitations tomorrow and
everything else that goes with it because i think it's a fun thing to do.
Unfortunatly i have seen things you wouldnt even believe
and have massive underlying issues as a consequence. I used
to prepare dead bodies for viewing, that wasnt much fun.
i'm not having a go at you dee, apologies if i'm too brash
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 206
speaking with the paramedics the other day was good, i
used to work with the guys and they see the same stuff i did.
ive got ptsd dee, had it years ago, unresolved when i was
assaulted many years back.
Never really got fixed.
thanks for your concern,i do need help for the issues.
for now its just a case of getting through the next few days.
Ive been trying to talk to the older fellas i know about how they
get through life and if theyve seen horrible things and that.
just a matter of keeping busy and getting over it. they reckon.haha
i cant escape my own head.
Wish the old man was here to ask.
anyway just thinking out loud.
used to work with the guys and they see the same stuff i did.
ive got ptsd dee, had it years ago, unresolved when i was
assaulted many years back.
Never really got fixed.
thanks for your concern,i do need help for the issues.
for now its just a case of getting through the next few days.
Ive been trying to talk to the older fellas i know about how they
get through life and if theyve seen horrible things and that.
just a matter of keeping busy and getting over it. they reckon.haha
i cant escape my own head.
Wish the old man was here to ask.
anyway just thinking out loud.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,443
There are events that happen to us all irrespective of our choices sure -
some good, some not so good.
I've seen my life based on bad choices and I've seen my life based on good choices and I know which one I pick to deal with the bad times, and to celebrate the good ones
To me attitude really is everything.
D
some good, some not so good.
I've seen my life based on bad choices and I've seen my life based on good choices and I know which one I pick to deal with the bad times, and to celebrate the good ones
To me attitude really is everything.
D
Member
Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 1,276
Good luck with your day 1 tomorrow oldmate! I’m glad you went to your doctor. The antidepressants should really help with your anxiety. I’d consider some therapy too. Keep making the right choices and you can definitely do this😀
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
Hey oldmate....
CHOICE..... choice is ours when we are sober. It is a tremendously challenging choice, but up to the point we CHOOSE to drink or drug, it remains our power.
We often need help in making that choice..... surrounding ourselves with support and reminders and taking actions that support it.
But it all starts with CHOICE....
Today, may you CHOOSE to embrace sobriety no matter what...
Today, may you CHOOSE to support that choice with ACTIONS....
Today, may your ACTIONS honor your choice of sobriety and....
Today, may you move in the direction of all that your life can be.
You can.
CHOICE..... choice is ours when we are sober. It is a tremendously challenging choice, but up to the point we CHOOSE to drink or drug, it remains our power.
We often need help in making that choice..... surrounding ourselves with support and reminders and taking actions that support it.
But it all starts with CHOICE....
Today, may you CHOOSE to embrace sobriety no matter what...
Today, may you CHOOSE to support that choice with ACTIONS....
Today, may your ACTIONS honor your choice of sobriety and....
Today, may you move in the direction of all that your life can be.
You can.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2016
Posts: 83
Good luck, oldmate! I hope this is the time for you. Relationship problems are emotionally traumatic aren't they, no matter who is right or wrong? It sounds like you have really got to plough everything you have into getting your own well-being right now. I really wish you well.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 206
Thanks free owl and SOSO
today is day one, lastnight was pretty rough and still have
some sweats and that but ive managaed to not use any of the
valium. I cant see me needed it unless something big happens
and i get in a panic.
anyway started the lovan this morning,see how that goes.
We are pretty blessed to have lifes where we can make choices,
i dont want to get in an argument about it but not everyone is
in such a position.
yes we can all choose and make choices,but in some parts of the world
some of the choices for people are made almost.
the reason i get my back up about this has nothing to do with me at all.
I used to work in remote community's where drug and alcohol and
other problems are rife.
People from the city would say to me, "why dont they just get a job or move"
Really a comment that someone would make without ever going out there.
them choices are almost taken away from them by their culture and theres
nothing out there for them.
Thats all.
just thought i'd mention it.
Hope youre all having a good day. just started getting shakes.
Cheers.
the long term relationship thing is interesting. i dint think it would hit me like it has. We had been together for 6 years and engaged for 2. due to the toxicity
of the relationship i was warned by everyone for a while.
Instead we worked hard and i thought it had come good, or better over the years.
anyway the last straw was getting patronised about my problem
and how all the women at this so called group told her to leave me
and how attractive she was and blah blah blah.
I didnt even let her finish and just said i hope the women at the group
keep you warm at night.
I just dont need that in my life, not after all the **** ive been through and done for her.
she was more interested in her fake nails and eyelashes she couldnt
take me to one follow up appointment with the detox people.
I usually never ask for a lift anywhere or help with anything.
Very dissapointing and sad. and pathetic.
I met her on the side of the road and fell in love at first sight,that
was 6 years ago. she had her fair share of problems and i stuck by
her. I guess now she's come good and has the confidence of these women
she doesnt need me. all good.
kind of wish i didnt spent thousands on that ring, but hey,
it happens.
live and learn.
Ive got no interest in women or complications at this stage,things are
hard enough as they are.
thanks for listening
today is day one, lastnight was pretty rough and still have
some sweats and that but ive managaed to not use any of the
valium. I cant see me needed it unless something big happens
and i get in a panic.
anyway started the lovan this morning,see how that goes.
We are pretty blessed to have lifes where we can make choices,
i dont want to get in an argument about it but not everyone is
in such a position.
yes we can all choose and make choices,but in some parts of the world
some of the choices for people are made almost.
the reason i get my back up about this has nothing to do with me at all.
I used to work in remote community's where drug and alcohol and
other problems are rife.
People from the city would say to me, "why dont they just get a job or move"
Really a comment that someone would make without ever going out there.
them choices are almost taken away from them by their culture and theres
nothing out there for them.
Thats all.
just thought i'd mention it.
Hope youre all having a good day. just started getting shakes.
Cheers.
the long term relationship thing is interesting. i dint think it would hit me like it has. We had been together for 6 years and engaged for 2. due to the toxicity
of the relationship i was warned by everyone for a while.
Instead we worked hard and i thought it had come good, or better over the years.
anyway the last straw was getting patronised about my problem
and how all the women at this so called group told her to leave me
and how attractive she was and blah blah blah.
I didnt even let her finish and just said i hope the women at the group
keep you warm at night.
I just dont need that in my life, not after all the **** ive been through and done for her.
she was more interested in her fake nails and eyelashes she couldnt
take me to one follow up appointment with the detox people.
I usually never ask for a lift anywhere or help with anything.
Very dissapointing and sad. and pathetic.
I met her on the side of the road and fell in love at first sight,that
was 6 years ago. she had her fair share of problems and i stuck by
her. I guess now she's come good and has the confidence of these women
she doesnt need me. all good.
kind of wish i didnt spent thousands on that ring, but hey,
it happens.
live and learn.
Ive got no interest in women or complications at this stage,things are
hard enough as they are.
thanks for listening
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 206
I just have to get this off my chest while i remember. the real
kicker in this story is this group of people that know all my buiseness and
blah blah blah, are the same mob i rang before my detox stint
in september.
they hung up the phone on me,twice and said i wasnt serious.
less than 24hrs after that i was addmitted to Emergency at
the hopsital and short listed straight into a detox.
You can see why i have such reservations about the whole thing.
the people that turned me away and risked my life all get to
know my buiseness and carry on. its disgusting. Some of them should be shot.
Thanks again for listening,sorry for sounding bitter because i am.
kicker in this story is this group of people that know all my buiseness and
blah blah blah, are the same mob i rang before my detox stint
in september.
they hung up the phone on me,twice and said i wasnt serious.
less than 24hrs after that i was addmitted to Emergency at
the hopsital and short listed straight into a detox.
You can see why i have such reservations about the whole thing.
the people that turned me away and risked my life all get to
know my buiseness and carry on. its disgusting. Some of them should be shot.
Thanks again for listening,sorry for sounding bitter because i am.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 206
ust an update, went for a light bike ride,felt ok aside from the
odd heart pound. Came home and had a big panic attack,took
10mg diaz. Hopefully thats all i need for the day.
I get chest pains,and like a lot of people on there, get scared by it.
Had a small bowl of oats too. cheers.
odd heart pound. Came home and had a big panic attack,took
10mg diaz. Hopefully thats all i need for the day.
I get chest pains,and like a lot of people on there, get scared by it.
Had a small bowl of oats too. cheers.
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