Advice for a chronic relapser that is tired of trying
Changing
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: NJ
Posts: 120
don't give up on yourself. be kind to yourself and remember you are not alone.
as for aa, try some speakers meetings where you can sit back relax and listen (no group share) maybe just go with the intent to identify with what is being shared - it makes me feel less alone and when i see people doing well (even when i feel awful) it gives me a little faith to hang in there.
hugs.
as for aa, try some speakers meetings where you can sit back relax and listen (no group share) maybe just go with the intent to identify with what is being shared - it makes me feel less alone and when i see people doing well (even when i feel awful) it gives me a little faith to hang in there.
hugs.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 102
thnx
Originally Posted by tiffanyeagle 
don't give up on yourself. be kind to yourself and remember you are not alone.
as for aa, try some speakers meetings where you can sit back relax and listen (no group share) maybe just go with the intent to identify with what is being shared - it makes me feel less alone and when i see people doing well (even when i feel awful) it gives me a little faith to hang in there. hugs.
as for aa, try some speakers meetings where you can sit back relax and listen (no group share) maybe just go with the intent to identify with what is being shared - it makes me feel less alone and when i see people doing well (even when i feel awful) it gives me a little faith to hang in there.
hugs.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Toronto, ON
Posts: 526
Hi Sky,
After today, I will have to let it go for my own well being (the issue with the person that's been consuming me). I just have to move on and acknowledge a few people are just callous scum. Honestly, am also afraid for my safety cuz this person may legitimately be crazy. If i can believe his brother, he's being held in the clink these days because of a domestic dispute. That's not even half of it, this person has deeper issues than any person with substance abuse or addiction I know or read about. Compulsive liar, scammer, fraud.
Went to police to file a report but they're useless. Told me to go to small claims court (sum accumulated to $1700)
. I can't believe this kind of scum is otherwise left to walk free to rip off others.
Guess I will just chalk it up to a lesson learned and cut my losses.
My gut instict knew for some time things weren't making sense, weren't adding up, caught him in lies numerous times but despite it, I gave it the benefit of the doubt because who rips off their dog walker/caretaker of all people? Scum does.
I hope he rotts and stays away cuz he scares me.
After today, I will have to let it go for my own well being (the issue with the person that's been consuming me). I just have to move on and acknowledge a few people are just callous scum. Honestly, am also afraid for my safety cuz this person may legitimately be crazy. If i can believe his brother, he's being held in the clink these days because of a domestic dispute. That's not even half of it, this person has deeper issues than any person with substance abuse or addiction I know or read about. Compulsive liar, scammer, fraud.
Went to police to file a report but they're useless. Told me to go to small claims court (sum accumulated to $1700)
. I can't believe this kind of scum is otherwise left to walk free to rip off others.Guess I will just chalk it up to a lesson learned and cut my losses.
My gut instict knew for some time things weren't making sense, weren't adding up, caught him in lies numerous times but despite it, I gave it the benefit of the doubt because who rips off their dog walker/caretaker of all people? Scum does.
I hope he rotts and stays away cuz he scares me.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: Georgia, USA
Posts: 2,229
Hello Sky, I have been a chronic relapser, too. But I have 27 days today! I just finished my fourth step. I think a huge difference for me is that I started taking anti-depressants. I had terrible depression and it was so hard for me to go to meetings and get interested in recovery . It was hard for me to talk to people. I feel so much better. I think I also got to the point that using hurt worse than not using. I understand feeling ready to die rather than keep struggling. I'm so glad you're continuing to try! You will find the answer for you if you don't give up.
AA helps me a lot. Now that I'm doing a better job of listening, I'm finding that there are a lot of people with long term sobriety that were chronic relapsers. We are in good company!
It's good to be back here on SR. I came back to share about my new recovery and hope and finishing the 4th step and I saw your post and wanted to respond.
Hugs to you!
AA helps me a lot. Now that I'm doing a better job of listening, I'm finding that there are a lot of people with long term sobriety that were chronic relapsers. We are in good company!
It's good to be back here on SR. I came back to share about my new recovery and hope and finishing the 4th step and I saw your post and wanted to respond.
Hugs to you!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 102
I am glad you got through your fourth step and are benefiting from AA.
Also, I am glad anti-depressants helped you stop being a chronic relapser.
happy you are here on SR!
Also, I am glad anti-depressants helped you stop being a chronic relapser.
happy you are here on SR!
Originally Posted by Sober369
Hello Sky, I have been a chronic relapser, too. But I have 27 days today! I just finished my fourth step. I think a huge difference for me is that I started taking anti-depressants. I had terrible depression and it was so hard for me to go to meetings and get interested in recovery . It was hard for me to talk to people. I feel so much better. I think I also got to the point that using hurt worse than not using. I understand feeling ready to die rather than keep struggling. I'm so glad you're continuing to try! You will find the answer for you if you don't give up.
AA helps me a lot. Now that I'm doing a better job of listening, I'm finding that there are a lot of people with long term sobriety that were chronic relapsers. We are in good company!
It's good to be back here on SR. I came back to share about my new recovery and hope and finishing the 4th step and I saw your post and wanted to respond.
Hugs to you!
AA helps me a lot. Now that I'm doing a better job of listening, I'm finding that there are a lot of people with long term sobriety that were chronic relapsers. We are in good company!
It's good to be back here on SR. I came back to share about my new recovery and hope and finishing the 4th step and I saw your post and wanted to respond.
Hugs to you!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 102
I do have a bit of my fight back...decided to re-apply for grad school programs again... I am really struggling to get it done but I started them today again...
also keeping it low-key and staying home
How about you?
How is therapy going?
also keeping it low-key and staying home
How about you?
How is therapy going?
Originally Posted by Stronger2017
How's it going sky? It sounds like you've got some of your fight back.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 102
Also, to be honest, I rewatched some season 6 episodes of Buffy last night and it really helped me get a bit of my strength back...I am far from okay but season 6 of that TV show was so relatable in terms of addiction and being in a funk etc..
Originally Posted by Stronger2017
How's it going sky? It sounds like you've got some of your fight back.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Maybe listening to some of the NA speakers online woud be helpful... Audioyjoy. NA Speakers Tapes & CD from Narcotics Anonymous Meetings App
Have you read the threads on making a plan? I know for me recovery only started being successful when it meant adding things in rather than just taking things out of my life. Before that I was 'sober' but not 'living' which kinda seemed to defeat the point.
This thread is a good one... https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...y-plans-1.html (Psst...wanna know why I'm always recommending recovery plans?)
I would suggest giving NA another shot - try different meetings to find the ones that help the most. You don't have to share yourself - but listening to the experience, strength and hope of others can make a massive difference. Besides, sharing in meetings really only is a very small part of it - the stuff you do yourself privately is the biggest part of the deal.
Wishing you all the best for your recovery.
BB
Have you read the threads on making a plan? I know for me recovery only started being successful when it meant adding things in rather than just taking things out of my life. Before that I was 'sober' but not 'living' which kinda seemed to defeat the point.
This thread is a good one... https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...y-plans-1.html (Psst...wanna know why I'm always recommending recovery plans?)
I would suggest giving NA another shot - try different meetings to find the ones that help the most. You don't have to share yourself - but listening to the experience, strength and hope of others can make a massive difference. Besides, sharing in meetings really only is a very small part of it - the stuff you do yourself privately is the biggest part of the deal.
Wishing you all the best for your recovery.
BB
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 102
Thank you for the helpful links. I listened to some of the speakers last night from the link you provided and it was great. As far as meetings...I am seeing a therapist and using SR that is enough for me now.
Originally Posted by Berrybean
Maybe listening to some of the NA speakers online woud be helpful... Audioyjoy. NA Speakers Tapes & CD from Narcotics Anonymous Meetings App
Have you read the threads on making a plan? I know for me recovery only started being successful when it meant adding things in rather than just taking things out of my life. Before that I was 'sober' but not 'living' which kinda seemed to defeat the point.
This thread is a good one... https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...y-plans-1.html (Psst...wanna know why I'm always recommending recovery plans?)
I would suggest giving NA another shot - try different meetings to find the ones that help the most. You don't have to share yourself - but listening to the experience, strength and hope of others can make a massive difference. Besides, sharing in meetings really only is a very small part of it - the stuff you do yourself privately is the biggest part of the deal.
Wishing you all the best for your recovery.
BB
Have you read the threads on making a plan? I know for me recovery only started being successful when it meant adding things in rather than just taking things out of my life. Before that I was 'sober' but not 'living' which kinda seemed to defeat the point.
This thread is a good one... https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...y-plans-1.html (Psst...wanna know why I'm always recommending recovery plans?)
I would suggest giving NA another shot - try different meetings to find the ones that help the most. You don't have to share yourself - but listening to the experience, strength and hope of others can make a massive difference. Besides, sharing in meetings really only is a very small part of it - the stuff you do yourself privately is the biggest part of the deal.
Wishing you all the best for your recovery.
BB
Member
Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 1,276
A week is solid progress. I hope you're doing okay (and improving little by little). My therapy on Monday ended up being a bit tough. I have to accept I'm not going to change everything immediately. I'm still not drinking over stuff, though, so I'm happy.
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