Feeling worse than ever
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 20
Feeling worse than ever
I'm 64 days sober. At the beginning I felt great. It gradually got worse. I'm now severely depressed and suffering from severe anxiety and panic attacks almost daily. This happened the last time I quit drinking. About three months in a became a wreck. It's like a switch got shut off. I don't understand why I'm feeling this way. I feel worse now and when I quit before, then when I was drinking. I have a doctors appointment but not until the end of March. Did anyone else experience this? I could just sit and cry all day everyday.
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
I experienced a definite change in anxiety in early sobriety too, yes. Depression and anxiety are common and treatable conditions, are you seeing a doctor or a therapist/counselor? There's only so much an MD can do to help in those situations.
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Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Queensland
Posts: 568
Hello 
Emotions and feelings can be very raw and uncomfortable when not glazed over with alcohol.
I'm not a doc and can't give medical advice but I would expect your doc will prescribe some anti anxiety/ depressant meds.
My doc prescribed Valium for me to help with anxiety. Works an absolute treat when I start to feel overwhelmed and in a place of dimness.
One thing I have experienced though, the longer I stay away from alcohol the better I feel and the less I need to take a V in order to cope with life.
I truly hope this happens for you.
FYI I am on 113 days clean and am finding life gets a wee bit more enjoyable and manageable with each new day. I still have rough days but with better clarity and no boozy brain fog those days are easier to deal with.
Stay strong and avoid the booze and you will get through this rough period xoxo
Emotions and feelings can be very raw and uncomfortable when not glazed over with alcohol.
I'm not a doc and can't give medical advice but I would expect your doc will prescribe some anti anxiety/ depressant meds.
My doc prescribed Valium for me to help with anxiety. Works an absolute treat when I start to feel overwhelmed and in a place of dimness.
One thing I have experienced though, the longer I stay away from alcohol the better I feel and the less I need to take a V in order to cope with life.
I truly hope this happens for you.
FYI I am on 113 days clean and am finding life gets a wee bit more enjoyable and manageable with each new day. I still have rough days but with better clarity and no boozy brain fog those days are easier to deal with.
Stay strong and avoid the booze and you will get through this rough period xoxo
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 20
Originally Posted by ScottFromWI 
I experienced a definite change in anxiety in early sobriety too, yes. Depression and anxiety are common and treatable conditions, are you seeing a doctor or a therapist/counselor? There's only so much an MD can do to help in those situations.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 20
Originally Posted by Poppy79
Hello
Emotions and feelings can be very raw and uncomfortable when not glazed over with alcohol.
I'm not a doc and can't give medical advice but I would expect your doc will prescribe some anti anxiety/ depressant meds.
My doc prescribed Valium for me to help with anxiety. Works an absolute treat when I start to feel overwhelmed and in a place of dimness.
One thing I have experienced though, the longer I stay away from alcohol the better I feel and the less I need to take a V in order to cope with life.
I truly hope this happens for you.
FYI I am on 113 days clean and am finding life gets a wee bit more enjoyable and manageable with each new day. I still have rough days but with better clarity and no boozy brain fog those days are easier to deal with.
Stay strong and avoid the booze and you will get through this rough period xoxo
Emotions and feelings can be very raw and uncomfortable when not glazed over with alcohol.
I'm not a doc and can't give medical advice but I would expect your doc will prescribe some anti anxiety/ depressant meds.
My doc prescribed Valium for me to help with anxiety. Works an absolute treat when I start to feel overwhelmed and in a place of dimness.
One thing I have experienced though, the longer I stay away from alcohol the better I feel and the less I need to take a V in order to cope with life.
I truly hope this happens for you.
FYI I am on 113 days clean and am finding life gets a wee bit more enjoyable and manageable with each new day. I still have rough days but with better clarity and no boozy brain fog those days are easier to deal with.
Stay strong and avoid the booze and you will get through this rough period xoxo
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,512
I also have to deal with anxiety and panic attacks. I take an antidepressant but it doesn't really help with anxiety. I would suggest talking to your therapist and getting some tips on how to manage. I have found some great books that help me, and gave me a sense of empowerment to know that I could help to manage my anxiety:
Amen, Daniel Change Your Brain, Change Your Life
Bassett, Lucinda From Panic to Power
Burns, David MD When Panic Attacks
Chodron, Pema The Places That Scare You
Doidge, Norman MD The Brain That Changes Itself
Dyer, Wayne The Power of Intention and Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life
Orsilla, Ken Mindful way Through Anxiety
Amen, Daniel Change Your Brain, Change Your Life
Bassett, Lucinda From Panic to Power
Burns, David MD When Panic Attacks
Chodron, Pema The Places That Scare You
Doidge, Norman MD The Brain That Changes Itself
Dyer, Wayne The Power of Intention and Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life
Orsilla, Ken Mindful way Through Anxiety
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Yep. Somehow I managed to stay sober but from 3 to 6 months things were very painful. I pretty much cried every time I was alone for more than a few minutes. My commutes left me completely soaked and red eyed. Early hours of the morning were my times for washing machine head and torturous thoughts. Round and round - relentless.
I needed to find new and better ways of dealing with life, and people, and ... well, being me I suppose. Just needed to alter the way I looked at things before I could drop the pain of the anxiety and resentments and general not-enoughness. For me, AA and the 12-step program worked (and is still working) wonders once I got desperate enough to put aside my fears and contempt for asking for help. That's just me though. Other people use different recovery tools.
Sobriety may be about stopping drinking. But Recovery is about learning new things and using what we learn to change what we do so that our sobriety can become bearable, then comfortable, and one day preferable to drinking.
Have you made a recovery plan at all? It might be worth having a good read of Dee's thread. It's helped a lot of people... http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...y-plans-2.html
Wishing you all the best for your sobriety and recovery. BB
I needed to find new and better ways of dealing with life, and people, and ... well, being me I suppose. Just needed to alter the way I looked at things before I could drop the pain of the anxiety and resentments and general not-enoughness. For me, AA and the 12-step program worked (and is still working) wonders once I got desperate enough to put aside my fears and contempt for asking for help. That's just me though. Other people use different recovery tools.
Sobriety may be about stopping drinking. But Recovery is about learning new things and using what we learn to change what we do so that our sobriety can become bearable, then comfortable, and one day preferable to drinking.
Have you made a recovery plan at all? It might be worth having a good read of Dee's thread. It's helped a lot of people... http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...y-plans-2.html
Wishing you all the best for your sobriety and recovery. BB
All is Change
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,284
Be, it might not seem so now when you are engulfed in this but know this... all these sensations are part of the healing. The sickness is leaving you, you are not getting worse you are getting better.
Ok. In the meantime, to cap the worst of the panic some people resort to medication or make an effort to suppress the sensations in some way. Locking them away using concepts of AV etc is claimed to be helpful. Having a plan (and sticking to it. Sticking to a program is very important. Part of the importance is not dependent on the program but on the 'saticking to it'. Persistence that pushes you past points where you have buckled in the past. If the program is not harmful then the persistence is bound to bring some good results.) This can be helpful in order to get respite and begin to see things more clearly.
When you see more clearly it is time to put in place a more long term recovery plan that aims to free you from the root causes of your miseries. For now, get some stability and respite.
Ok. In the meantime, to cap the worst of the panic some people resort to medication or make an effort to suppress the sensations in some way. Locking them away using concepts of AV etc is claimed to be helpful. Having a plan (and sticking to it. Sticking to a program is very important. Part of the importance is not dependent on the program but on the 'saticking to it'. Persistence that pushes you past points where you have buckled in the past. If the program is not harmful then the persistence is bound to bring some good results.) This can be helpful in order to get respite and begin to see things more clearly.
When you see more clearly it is time to put in place a more long term recovery plan that aims to free you from the root causes of your miseries. For now, get some stability and respite.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Long Island, NY
Posts: 42
I can very much relate to this at the moment. I feel months 2 and 3 were easier than month 4 and now my current month 5. And I feel the exact same confusion because I truly thought once I got over the hurtle of the first couple months, that it would just be..... easier? Looking back I realize that was naive, or overly hopeful or something, but it doesn't make it suck any less.
I know nothing I'm saying is really advice to help you move past this, because I wish I knew the answer for myself - but I just wanted to comment and say you are most definitely not alone. Anxiety has governed much of my life, and is the reason I became an addict in the first place... I miss leaning on that crutch when my anxiety got really bad.
The couple things I'll mention are things that are VERY difficult to do (at least how I feel) when you're anxious and depressed... and that's eating healthier and exercise. I know. It's ridiculously hard to find the motivation when all you want to do is curl up in a ball and shut the world out for hours at a time. But I honestly think the yoga I've gotten into in the last month has been saving my life. There is an amazing channel on YouTube called "Yoga with Adriene", which is great because you can just do it at your own pace from the comfort of your home, with no judgement. And it's free. I developed quite an energy drink addiction after sobering up, and I'm currently trying to kick that habit - so I would also suggest caffeine is probably making your anxiety worse, if you happen to drink a lot of coffee or drinks of that nature. Lastly, try a multi vitamin. I know these all sound basic and cliche, but these small adjustments (along with possible medication, I currently am on a small dose of Klonopin for what it's worth) could possibly set the foundation into moving into the new and improved, best part of your life. At least that's what I'm striving for. I wish you the best of luck!!
I know nothing I'm saying is really advice to help you move past this, because I wish I knew the answer for myself - but I just wanted to comment and say you are most definitely not alone. Anxiety has governed much of my life, and is the reason I became an addict in the first place... I miss leaning on that crutch when my anxiety got really bad.
The couple things I'll mention are things that are VERY difficult to do (at least how I feel) when you're anxious and depressed... and that's eating healthier and exercise. I know. It's ridiculously hard to find the motivation when all you want to do is curl up in a ball and shut the world out for hours at a time. But I honestly think the yoga I've gotten into in the last month has been saving my life. There is an amazing channel on YouTube called "Yoga with Adriene", which is great because you can just do it at your own pace from the comfort of your home, with no judgement. And it's free. I developed quite an energy drink addiction after sobering up, and I'm currently trying to kick that habit - so I would also suggest caffeine is probably making your anxiety worse, if you happen to drink a lot of coffee or drinks of that nature. Lastly, try a multi vitamin. I know these all sound basic and cliche, but these small adjustments (along with possible medication, I currently am on a small dose of Klonopin for what it's worth) could possibly set the foundation into moving into the new and improved, best part of your life. At least that's what I'm striving for. I wish you the best of luck!!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 37
Online Doc?
If you feel you need urgent attention you can try an online doc. They are affordable ($45), open 24/7 and have both MDs, and therapist. They can walk you through a few EFT exercises - or maybe get you a mild sedative. I have used t his service. amwell , but there are many out there now. You can use one in your home town.
I use Benedryl sometimes - but that is me. But I have terrible attacks as well.
Just my thoughts.
I use Benedryl sometimes - but that is me. But I have terrible attacks as well.
Just my thoughts.
Now what?
Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: Oregon Coast
Posts: 100
Originally Posted by Beabetterme
Thank you all for the suggestions. I really appreciate them. Last night the panic attack was so bad I felt like I needed to call 911. It's hell living like this.
Over time, I've learned to make some big lifestyle adjustments to help me cope with ongoing anxiety, sans medication, because I am hyper sensitive to "incoming". My filters don't work very well. One of those changes included moving out of the city. That alone has reduced my stress level enormously.
Can you think of a couple of things you could do or change that might reduce some of the stress in your life?
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Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: middle of nowhere
Posts: 2,849
There are some great replies in here already, I thought I'd just throw a few more out there.
I too suffer from really awful anxiety. I am well medicated now and my head ticks along ok for the most part but some things completely yank the reins out of my hands and the wild horses in my head get loose and wild.
When I was in treatment we learned a lot of really good techniques, some of which I had already learned, or variations on other ones, etc. to help reduce stress and gain control of my emotions.
I think the best thing is to practice these techniques when our stress levels are not too high though, and to make sure they are daily implemented in our recovery plan. I know, with my last horrible family encounter, ALL my SOS plans flew right out the window faster than I could blink. I hadn't gotten into the habit of using those tools and techniques because I wasn't daily implementing them in small and big ways.
In any case, there's something to think of.
There are all kinds of grounding techniques one can do.
Yoga, exercise, meditation, journaling, counseling, breathing exercises, reading, running, walking, art.
For me, in recovery a huge part is the face to face peer support and prayer.
Being prayerful and being present with people helps to keep me mindful and present in the here and now. Practicing gratitude is a HUGE help for me. Picking out every, single thing I can think of that I am grateful for and concentrating on pouring gratitude onto those things in my mind and heart can really help take my focus of the negative and the fear that is causing me anxiety. I find when I am really bad off, it takes a lot of effort. But for me it can turn my day and my attitude right around.
I am certainly not miles away from my anxiety and I'm glad you posted this, as I need the reminders for myself too on what I ought to be practicing daily.
Also... I'm pretty hard on myself and I'd wager you are on yourself too... so remember to practice self-care.. self love and kindness. Sending loving peaceful thoughts your way
much love,
Del
I too suffer from really awful anxiety. I am well medicated now and my head ticks along ok for the most part but some things completely yank the reins out of my hands and the wild horses in my head get loose and wild.
When I was in treatment we learned a lot of really good techniques, some of which I had already learned, or variations on other ones, etc. to help reduce stress and gain control of my emotions.
I think the best thing is to practice these techniques when our stress levels are not too high though, and to make sure they are daily implemented in our recovery plan. I know, with my last horrible family encounter, ALL my SOS plans flew right out the window faster than I could blink. I hadn't gotten into the habit of using those tools and techniques because I wasn't daily implementing them in small and big ways.
In any case, there's something to think of.
There are all kinds of grounding techniques one can do.
Yoga, exercise, meditation, journaling, counseling, breathing exercises, reading, running, walking, art.
For me, in recovery a huge part is the face to face peer support and prayer.
Being prayerful and being present with people helps to keep me mindful and present in the here and now. Practicing gratitude is a HUGE help for me. Picking out every, single thing I can think of that I am grateful for and concentrating on pouring gratitude onto those things in my mind and heart can really help take my focus of the negative and the fear that is causing me anxiety. I find when I am really bad off, it takes a lot of effort. But for me it can turn my day and my attitude right around.
I am certainly not miles away from my anxiety and I'm glad you posted this, as I need the reminders for myself too on what I ought to be practicing daily.
Also... I'm pretty hard on myself and I'd wager you are on yourself too... so remember to practice self-care.. self love and kindness. Sending loving peaceful thoughts your way
much love,
Del
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 334
Hi Bebetterme.I can relate to where you currently are,almost exactly.Three months in was when I was at my lowest too.SR will support you.You may not beleive just yet that things will improve but trust us,they will,very soon too.You are healing physicaly,mentaly and spiritualy.Have a recovety plan and work it.Many links on here.Or just formulate a plan that works for you.Keep going
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 334
Originally Posted by Beabetterme
Thank you all for the suggestions. I really appreciate them. Last night the panic attack was so bad I felt like I needed to call 911. It's hell living like this.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 334
Originally Posted by Berrybean
Yep. Somehow I managed to stay sober but from 3 to 6 months things were very painful. I pretty much cried every time I was alone for more than a few minutes. My commutes left me completely soaked and red eyed. Early hours of the morning were my times for washing machine head and torturous thoughts. Round and round - relentless.
I needed to find new and better ways of dealing with life, and people, and ... well, being me I suppose. Just needed to alter the way I looked at things before I could drop the pain of the anxiety and resentments and general not-enoughness. For me, AA and the 12-step program worked (and is still working) wonders once I got desperate enough to put aside my fears and contempt for asking for help. That's just me though. Other people use different recovery tools.
Sobriety may be about stopping drinking. But Recovery is about learning new things and using what we learn to change what we do so that our sobriety can become bearable, then comfortable, and one day preferable to drinking.
Have you made a recovery plan at all? It might be worth having a good read of Dee's thread. It's helped a lot of people... http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...y-plans-2.html
Wishing you all the best for your sobriety and recovery. BB
I needed to find new and better ways of dealing with life, and people, and ... well, being me I suppose. Just needed to alter the way I looked at things before I could drop the pain of the anxiety and resentments and general not-enoughness. For me, AA and the 12-step program worked (and is still working) wonders once I got desperate enough to put aside my fears and contempt for asking for help. That's just me though. Other people use different recovery tools.
Sobriety may be about stopping drinking. But Recovery is about learning new things and using what we learn to change what we do so that our sobriety can become bearable, then comfortable, and one day preferable to drinking.
Have you made a recovery plan at all? It might be worth having a good read of Dee's thread. It's helped a lot of people... http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...y-plans-2.html
Wishing you all the best for your sobriety and recovery. BB
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 2
Have you tried praying for your feelings of anxiety to be removed? I did and it worked for me. Only rare, brief moments of minimal anxiety ever since. I've suffered from anxiety for SO LONG that this is truly a miracle. Good luck and God bless.
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-67
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Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: London
Posts: 172
I totally relate, my anxiety has gone up a good few levels as I hit 2-3 months sober.
But I accept it and know it will pass and no matter how bad the panic gets it won't kill me it's just my bodies natural reaction to the adrenaline in my system. Try belly breathing it relaxes the nervous system and mediation. I find my anxiety is worse if Iam hungry.
But I accept it and know it will pass and no matter how bad the panic gets it won't kill me it's just my bodies natural reaction to the adrenaline in my system. Try belly breathing it relaxes the nervous system and mediation. I find my anxiety is worse if Iam hungry.
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