Avra

Hi everyone, its been awhile since I have been on here, but be sure I have lurked a lot, just haven't felt ready to post. See, I have come and gone a lot from here. Most I usually had sober was less than a week.

Finally figured I could use the support and friendship of people like me. I don't know any alcoholics in my day to day life (well, any that I know of, I am sure there are people I know that are). As of today I have been sober 40 days. That feels like a long time to me, but I know its just the beginning. I certainly feel better both mentally and physically (except for being really tired and headachy a lot) but my mood swings are big and I now have to deal sober with a lot of the mental health issues I suffer from (mostly anxiety based).

Since quitting I have had to face two dinner parties at my house, a party out on the town last Saturday. Coming down the pipe I have a Christmas block party next Friday, a work party the weekend after, then Christmas Eve and Day. Whew. There was a party tonight I blew off. WHile I am absolutely confident I wouldn't drink, I also know its early enough days that such a decision would be hard, and I just didn't want a hard night tonite. ITs been a long week.

Anyway I am rambling, just wanted to say hi and post.

Winslow

Hi Avra,great job on 40 days!!

Dee74

Good to see you back Avra - 40 days is a great start

D

Maudcat

Congratulations, Avra. Job well done.

Midwest1981

I am glad you decided to post! Congratulations on 40 days. That is awesome.

August252015

Glad you posted- great start!

What is your plan for sobriety, and particularly for the upcoming to-dos you mention?

Avra

I am still working out my plan and having trouble really cementing one. I do visit here daily, I am exercising and eating better and have taken up some crafting I used to do. I have avoided some events where I have felt vulnerable but am left with some I have obligations to attend. Thankfully after dec things should quiet right down and then I plan to avoid most social gatherings for awhile.

My plan for those events this month is to drive (I haven't drank and driven in past and driving puts a responsibility on me that helps my mindset), and take my own. I can then leave earlier than my husband if I feel the heat. Other than that I am. It sure how to plan for them...

I am feeling really good and have no intention to break that again. That said I just want the holidays done

PurpleKnight

Welcome back Avra!! Day 40 is fantastic!!

HelenofTroy

Welcome back Avra. We are at pretty much the same point - I am on day 45. Driving is a great excuse ("no thanks, I'm driving"). Sounds like you are doing a lot of similar things to me. I hope you keep posting

Soberwolf

40 days is really great keep up the good work Avra

Avra

Thanks everone for the welcome and good to see you around here soberwolf. I recall we conversed on her what now feels like many moons ago.

Anna

It's good to see you back, Avra and congratulations on 40 days.

PhoenixJ

Avra- a good, sound plan How to deal with the guts of festive things? Just remember (for me) no booze, if I feel stress- walk away. The dangerous one is letting my guard down 'oh well it is xmas- 1 drink will not hurt'. Dangerous last words. Plus of course the obvious one- car plus alcohol equals bad things. If I was to drink and I had a car as transport- what would I do to stay safe? PJ

quitter62

40 days seems like forever to me right now. Congrats to you and here is to your next 40 days.

Doug39

I am also at the same point as you Avra, my last day of drinking was October 24.

I also suffer from anxiety and I feel awful most of the time.

Good luck. We will get through this.

least

Congrats on forty days sober! Keep going, it gets better.

Avra

I am a bit worried about Christmas eve/day. My Mother in law usually pushes the wine and in the past when I have quit she has always made it sound like its ruining the fun. She is a drinker - I would say a problem drinker in that its so important to her that everyone have a drink. I don't want it to be uncomfortable or hard, I just want to enjoy the day and enjoy my daughters joy in Christmas. Get back to the things that matter. I know when we go there they will drink and that's fine, but I really hope they don't make an issue out me and my husband not drinking.

The other events I am not as stressed about because I don't foresee anyone making a big deal over me not drinking.

Today was a bad day, and I am feeling less positive about sobriety today than I have yet so far. I got in a fight with my daughter and a lot of feelings are coming up for me that I think existed before but that I would just drink away. I really need to work on my relationship with my daughter, I feel I have been emotionally absent as I have been a drunk her whole life (she is seven).

anyway, I am ranting now. Thanks for listening.

Plure

40 days is awesome. Keep on truckin'!

soberlicious

If it were me, I would find a way to kindly, but firmly, point out that she is actually the one "ruining the fun" by completely harshing my mellow by harping. Congrats on your decision to quit. Life is so much better without the booze!!

Doug39

Drinkers that try to get non-drinkers to drink irritate me.

If drinkers can't respect the fact that you do not want to drink, the hell with them. I understand it is tough when it is a family member but if they can't respect your right to say sober they are immature.