View Poll Results: Did you get & stay sober on your first attempt of sobriety ?
Yes
23
16.43%
No
117
83.57%
Voters: 140. You may not vote on this poll
Did you get sober on your first ever attempt at sobriety
I could see peace instead of this
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Canada, eh
Posts: 2,360
Yes, the first time.
When I was beaten down by alcohol enough, I was so desperate for change that I spent 5 weeks in a treatment centre, 13 months in a half-way house (sober living) attended AA regularly, got a sponsor and did the steps. That kept me without a drink for just about 30 years.
For over 20 of those years, I was mainly contented with life (with its normal ups and downs - deaths, divorce, bad relationships, breakups etc.) and did not miss drinking. I only relapsed because I took it all for granted and slacked off on maintaining my sobriety.
When I was beaten down by alcohol enough, I was so desperate for change that I spent 5 weeks in a treatment centre, 13 months in a half-way house (sober living) attended AA regularly, got a sponsor and did the steps. That kept me without a drink for just about 30 years.
For over 20 of those years, I was mainly contented with life (with its normal ups and downs - deaths, divorce, bad relationships, breakups etc.) and did not miss drinking. I only relapsed because I took it all for granted and slacked off on maintaining my sobriety.
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Northwest
Posts: 4,215
Just my opinion, but no one can truthfully say "yes" to this unless their survivors come here after the dry funeral. We all know complacency can be a dangerous thing...
I did stay sober for over five years my first time and I so wish I had never gotten complacent about it...
I did stay sober for over five years my first time and I so wish I had never gotten complacent about it...
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Upper Midwest
Posts: 1,730
I came here to BECAUSE I wanted to quit. I took the name "Firstymer" because it was my first serious attempt to quit. That was 2 1/2 years ago. I haven't had a drink since the day I arrived here. I consider that, in large part, a testament to the help and support that I received from you kind people.
So, yes, it can be done on the first try. Please don't think that you are destined to fail just because this is may be your first serious attempt to quit. Life does sometimes give us second chances. But not always.
So, yes, it can be done on the first try. Please don't think that you are destined to fail just because this is may be your first serious attempt to quit. Life does sometimes give us second chances. But not always.
EnjoyingTheJourney
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 3,847
Tricky question - at first glance.
Over the past 20 years, I quit for a week or a month at a time for 'health reasons' or to 'lose weight' Never did I think, believe or admit I was an Alcoholic.
I found SR last August and browsed around a few times. Then forgot about it until....
January 1, 2016
The day I finally admitted to being an Alcoholic and the day I vowed to become Sober.
If I DRINK again I will DIE. Simple and not so tricky. So I checked YES.
Thank you God and all you good people here on SR!
Over the past 20 years, I quit for a week or a month at a time for 'health reasons' or to 'lose weight' Never did I think, believe or admit I was an Alcoholic.
I found SR last August and browsed around a few times. Then forgot about it until....
January 1, 2016
The day I finally admitted to being an Alcoholic and the day I vowed to become Sober.
If I DRINK again I will DIE. Simple and not so tricky. So I checked YES.
Thank you God and all you good people here on SR!
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
Yup. I convinced myself that I was only going to get one chance at this. No half measures. Failure was never a possibility.
That seemed to me to be the best way to guarantee success. Coming up on five years sober.
That seemed to me to be the best way to guarantee success. Coming up on five years sober.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
Well, until about two weeks ago I would have said yes, and I was proud of it. I had countless half hearted wishes to get sober before I quit for over two years, but those never lasted longer than a day or two and I did nothing to make it stick. So with my success when I did start real recovery work, I thought it was all about a clear decision and then continued efforts to make it stick. I still think that way after my recent relapse because it's clear looking back that I neglected my recovery for a while before I picked up, so it was classic in that sense.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: FLAAADAH
Posts: 793
I probably should'nt chime in on this topic...but I think I will. Since October of 2011 I have had 20 Day one's. The longest 5 months...the shortest...5 hours. Why have i been counting Day one's? I have not a clue. Documenting my failure's I suppose.
I have had 13 years of sobriety at one point, from 1986 - 1999. I do know after 1-2 years, you never give alcohol or drinking another thought. Not with the intent of imbibbing again anyway. It's just something you never ever give a passing thought to....the furtherest thing from your mind....until you let your guard down and think you have it "licked". In just a few weeks, you find that you dont. Moderation is NEVER an option. Never was !
I could write a book on why it is so "D" difficult for me to stop the madness. A very toxic marriage has a LOT to do with it ! You usually hear of the sober spouse leaving the alcoholic...but in my case, the alcoholic needs to end the toxic relation with the sober spouse if I have even a prayer of long term sobriety...but...aint gonna happen.
I'am 11 days relapsed as I type this. Yes...i'am drinking AT her ! I'am so ready to get off this merry go round !!!
So...I guess it's time for...Day 1 again...for the 21st time.
God...when is it gonna end?
DD
I have had 13 years of sobriety at one point, from 1986 - 1999. I do know after 1-2 years, you never give alcohol or drinking another thought. Not with the intent of imbibbing again anyway. It's just something you never ever give a passing thought to....the furtherest thing from your mind....until you let your guard down and think you have it "licked". In just a few weeks, you find that you dont. Moderation is NEVER an option. Never was !
I could write a book on why it is so "D" difficult for me to stop the madness. A very toxic marriage has a LOT to do with it ! You usually hear of the sober spouse leaving the alcoholic...but in my case, the alcoholic needs to end the toxic relation with the sober spouse if I have even a prayer of long term sobriety...but...aint gonna happen.
I'am 11 days relapsed as I type this. Yes...i'am drinking AT her ! I'am so ready to get off this merry go round !!!
So...I guess it's time for...Day 1 again...for the 21st time.
God...when is it gonna end?
DD
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 8,076
No I didn't. I've had a few day ones. I'm hoping I've had my last day one. Currently I'm 51 days sober. I need to make it stick this time. My doctor says I might have fatty liver disease. Getting a blood test for it tomorrow to find out if it was from my drinking, my horrible diet while I was drinking or, a combination of the two. Guess it's nothing to drink over though. (lol).
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,544
The first time I have actually seen this written
2. Pay no attention to the urban legends of sobriety, either that "relapse is a part of recovery" -- wrong! -- or to the voice in your head that says you can probably drink again at some point. You cannot.
2. Pay no attention to the urban legends of sobriety, either that "relapse is a part of recovery" -- wrong! -- or to the voice in your head that says you can probably drink again at some point. You cannot.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 130
Made it over a year the first time, but then decided I could go back to drinking "socially". Made up rules and have over the past years broke every one of them. Now back and hopefully smart enough to stay sober this time around.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 95
#1: I tried once before in my 20s. I met a wonderful woman and knew that she would not put up with the drunk or high me, so I decided to quit everything. I was doing well, our relationship was cool, and after a few months of seeing each other, we began living together. After a few months, we experienced some conflict; and I retreated to the bottle. Soon after that I moved out and got back into partying as well. I lasted @ 6 months.
#2: In my 20s again I decided to quit everything because I was not happy with who or what I had become. I got myself clean, even began lifting weights and getting back into music, and was feeling good about myself. Near that 6-month mark is when I felt like I had things under control, that I could handle drinking in moderation because I had "attained wisdom." I went back to drinking heavily although I did stay off the drugs for 15 years.
#3: The third time is the charm. That's where I am right now. I realize that one of the reasons I did not make the previous two encounters is because I did not seek support; I tried to do it on my own. It's hard for me to admit that I need help with emotional issues, but I did take the first step and have begun attending AA meetings.
#2: In my 20s again I decided to quit everything because I was not happy with who or what I had become. I got myself clean, even began lifting weights and getting back into music, and was feeling good about myself. Near that 6-month mark is when I felt like I had things under control, that I could handle drinking in moderation because I had "attained wisdom." I went back to drinking heavily although I did stay off the drugs for 15 years.
#3: The third time is the charm. That's where I am right now. I realize that one of the reasons I did not make the previous two encounters is because I did not seek support; I tried to do it on my own. It's hard for me to admit that I need help with emotional issues, but I did take the first step and have begun attending AA meetings.
Reality...what a concept!
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: CT, USA
Posts: 1,232
Great poll and lots of insight from participants as always!
I voted No...but only because I've gone the route of "whittling down" the days I drink. First I got through a day. Then 3 days. Then a work week (Monday through Thursday)...the toughest was the weekend but eventually I only caved on Sundays. Then my birthday fell on a Sunday - it was miserable - so I drank. But that was the last day I did. It's only been 3 weeks but it seems to be sticking this time and everyday gets a little easier.
I voted No...but only because I've gone the route of "whittling down" the days I drink. First I got through a day. Then 3 days. Then a work week (Monday through Thursday)...the toughest was the weekend but eventually I only caved on Sundays. Then my birthday fell on a Sunday - it was miserable - so I drank. But that was the last day I did. It's only been 3 weeks but it seems to be sticking this time and everyday gets a little easier.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 113
I also tried hundreds of times before. I never felt it would work, really, and it never did. I was using the wrong approach for me. Now, I'm doing things differently and it feels different.
As others have said, it's impossible to say that "you never drank again" because the time hasn't happened yet. But I can say for certain that I didn't get and stay sober on my first attempt.
As others have said, it's impossible to say that "you never drank again" because the time hasn't happened yet. But I can say for certain that I didn't get and stay sober on my first attempt.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Houston, TX
Posts: 2,126
1) "...As others have said, it's impossible to say that "you never drank again" because the time hasn't happened yet.."
2) "...no one can truthfully say "yes" to this unless their survivors come here after the dry funeral..."
3) "... if you are still on your first attempt to quit, it's impossible to say whether you are now permanently sober..."
4) "...The people that quit on their first time aren't here..."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
Regarding #'s 1-3, remember that the question was only 'Did you get sober on your first ever attempt at sobriety' not did you get and stay sober forever/permanently. All three of the sponsors that I've had got sober on their first ever attempts, and since two of them have died (sober) I guess one could say they got and stayed sober permanently.
Regarding #4.....sure they're here (at least 20), and that would include me; I went to my first AA meeting on Monday, June 23, 1986, and have remained C&S since then.
(o:
2) "...no one can truthfully say "yes" to this unless their survivors come here after the dry funeral..."
3) "... if you are still on your first attempt to quit, it's impossible to say whether you are now permanently sober..."
4) "...The people that quit on their first time aren't here..."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
Regarding #'s 1-3, remember that the question was only 'Did you get sober on your first ever attempt at sobriety' not did you get and stay sober forever/permanently. All three of the sponsors that I've had got sober on their first ever attempts, and since two of them have died (sober) I guess one could say they got and stayed sober permanently.
Regarding #4.....sure they're here (at least 20), and that would include me; I went to my first AA meeting on Monday, June 23, 1986, and have remained C&S since then.
(o:
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