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Old 05-07-2015, 10:25 AM
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Have you noticed?

This post is a little bit of a venting measure and a genuine question...
I use Sober Recover during the week to keep me motivated and to motivate others. I've been finding that most Wednesdays the thread gets filled with many people who are relapsing. I find these posts hard to read especially the ones that are written by posters who are currently drunk or "pooping a top" while posting. (I get the..."well they are drinking, why shouldn't I?" feeling) I'm wondering if we should add a Middle of the week tread for those that find it hard to get through the whole week without drinking?

I know that relapses happen and I am not above them. But maybe a Get through the week thread would keep more posters sober? Just wondering...
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Old 05-07-2015, 10:30 AM
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Nothings prevents you from starting one. Go for it.
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Old 05-07-2015, 10:43 AM
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I can't even fathom posting on here if, I picked up a drink again.
I make any excuse there is to have a drink and twice as many to stay sober.
I know i can have a relapse but, I don't know for certain if, I could recover again
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Old 05-07-2015, 11:02 AM
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I have trouble with "in the middle of a relapse" posts sometimes, too. I think LBrain does a Wednesday thread for getting through the latter half of the week. But couldn't hurt to start one in the flavor of your liking.
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Old 05-07-2015, 11:05 AM
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There is a Weekenders thread, also:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...y-7-until.html

I think that Weasal starts a new thread each Thursday.
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Old 05-07-2015, 11:34 AM
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LBrain has been doing a Wednesday thread for a few weeks now and it's very good. Weasel always posts a weekend thread on Thursday morning. It's up and running as we speak.

It's hard to read about relapses. I sometimes struggle with that in my own home because my husband is currently in relapse. I think "why can't I drink too?". Then reality sets in and just because he's drinking when he shouldn't, doesn't mean that I should follow suit.

Hang in there.
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Old 05-07-2015, 12:03 PM
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I actually view it from the exact opposite perspective. Part of what helps keep me sober is by recalling all the pain and suffering I went through to get sober, and also seeing and trying to help others that are struggling.
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Old 05-07-2015, 12:08 PM
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Originally Posted by ScottFromWI View Post
I actually view it from the exact opposite perspective. Part of what helps keep me sober is by recalling all the pain and suffering I went through to get sober, and also seeing and trying to help others that are struggling.
Seeing others suffer with relapses and the problems that follow has never made me feel like drinking, so I guess we're all different.

You are welcome to start any kind of thread that you like and see how it goes.
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Old 05-07-2015, 12:13 PM
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I learned early from others in the rooms - listen to the guy who relapses. Much as there can be a road map to sobriety in reading threads/post/blogs/stories of friends here there is tremendous value for me in analysis of the road map to relapse.

I consider this a growth opportunity today and am indeed grateful for these threads/posts.

If you have a desire to start a thread, please do!!! There's no official method, some catch on and others not so much.

Look forward to reading yours!!!
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Old 05-07-2015, 02:39 PM
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I understand where you're coming from. When I was first here, I was struggling a bit and it was very hard when I kept seeing people relapsing. One night, I pretty much was like, "well everyone else is getting to have fun while I'm struggling being sober over here," and decided to drink. When I thought about things after the relapse, I realized my sobriety was up to me. It didn't matter if the whole world was getting drunk. If I wanted to be sober, it was me that had to keep myself sober.
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Old 05-07-2015, 02:52 PM
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I think you need to read the Thursday posts as well My susnshine.
I doubt there's anyone here really having fun.

D
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Old 05-07-2015, 03:14 PM
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I pretty much understand where all are coming from. As a SR newcomer, I seldom ventured into the Newcomers Forum. Not for months, in fact, because it *did* seem too focused on relapse. On the other hand, I undoubtedly missed out on some wisdom from those in recovery and inspiration, too.

What I did do, and encourage you if you haven't, is join my SR month class. (I'm admittedly biased, but I think mine is the best!) It helped to be around others at the same point in sobriety, jointly build accountability and extend and receive support.
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Old 05-07-2015, 03:23 PM
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Venecia, those month classes are one of the best things that's ever happened to me I think!

And my take on the relapses depends on the day and my current mood. I flip flop between them making me want to join in and have a drink and reminding me why I never want to go back there... Guess it depends on whether I'm louder or my AV is at the moment
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Old 05-07-2015, 03:24 PM
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Originally Posted by ScottFromWI View Post
I actually view it from the exact opposite perspective. Part of what helps keep me sober is by recalling all the pain and suffering I went through to get sober, and also seeing and trying to help others that are struggling.
I see it another way today. Recalling my pain and suffering use to help with my recovery, but that involved a level of fear based psychic choice which became no longer necessary. In other words, AA among other recovery sources made choice possible for me and then choice became unnecessary.

While in recovery, I also didn't compare my recovery with others suffering and / or relapsing as a way to reinforce my recovery. The comment that I've heard at AA meetings and on some boards re: those that relapse "they've done the research for me" was also unnecessary for my recovery. I find that that comment tends to be condescending.
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Old 05-07-2015, 03:27 PM
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Bear in mind, even if it seems like a lot of relapse is going on , I've yet to see anyone report enjoying it. It only prolongs the difficulty of living in addiction.

An old buddy who hasn't been here in a long time checked in today. It reminded me of conversations we used to have, ones that focused on living in the solution.

He's been sober a year now. (Way to go, Weaver!)
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Old 05-07-2015, 03:33 PM
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LBrain usually starts a "hump day" thread every Wednesday if that helps any.
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Old 05-07-2015, 04:55 PM
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I don't feel like they trigger me at all because most of the time the people seem miserable and I just feel sad for them because I remember that pain vividly.
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Old 05-07-2015, 05:22 PM
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I'm just being a poor SR member right now. A little Bitter.
When reading the post yesterday some of the relapse post seemed like they were only posting to make themselves feel better about it. Like a way to justify their actions. "I'm drinking today, but it's okay because I'll start being sober tomorrow." Like I said I was venting, I'm taking my sobriety very seriously and it just upsets me when others don't do the same. Like I said I'm not above relapse just kinda "peeved" if you will at some that use this site as a scapegoat.
I do feel the pain of others when they are truly trying to beat the disease and try my best to support them and help them get over the current bump in the road. Its the other post that upset me.
Sorry, again for being a bad SR member and not supporting everyone. I'll try and adjust my attitude.


]
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Old 05-07-2015, 05:26 PM
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We all have a right to our feelings you have nothing to be sorry for. Sometimes it can be frustrating.
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