Blogs


Notices

Hi

Old 05-03-2015, 12:00 PM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
stime's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 55
Hi

so this is the first time I've tried a formal recovery program of any sort though I've contemplated it lots of times. I always end up talking myself into the idea that I don't really have a problem because I can go days without drinking and don't drink all day etc but here I sit with a hangover on a beautiful day--another wasted beautiful day--ashamed of what I did the night before when I was drunk and yet not all the way remembering. Again. So many things I'm ashamed of so much humiliation, so many times I've scared myself or put myself in danger or hurt people when I was drunk but yeah I don't *really* have a problem. Last night wasn't even that bad but I want my life back--my pretty body and face. My sense of humor, my self respect. I hope this can help
stime is offline  
The Following 10 Users Say Thank You to stime For This Useful Post:
CeeFarro (05-05-2015), FrankLapidas (05-03-2015), gettingsmarter (05-03-2015), Hevyn (05-03-2015), laska23 (05-03-2015), least (05-03-2015), Lily123 (05-03-2015), saoutchik (05-03-2015), site1Q84 (05-04-2015), Talz (05-03-2015)
Old 05-03-2015, 12:04 PM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 53
Hello
Its my first day here too - lets do this
laska23 is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to laska23 For This Useful Post:
CeeFarro (05-05-2015), gettingsmarter (05-03-2015), saoutchik (05-03-2015), stime (05-03-2015)
Old 05-03-2015, 12:04 PM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Member
 
ZaBoozer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Johannesburg, Gauteng, South Africa
Posts: 1,371
Welcome stime, you have come to the right place if you want to quit. Everyone here is very helpful and supportive. Feel free to have a look round at some of the threads, you may find some inspiration.
ZaBoozer is offline  
The Following User Says Thank You to ZaBoozer For This Useful Post:
stime (05-03-2015)
Old 05-03-2015, 12:05 PM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Member
 
ForMeForThem's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: New York
Posts: 1,372
Blog Entries: 9
Welcome stime. You've found a place where people understand exactly how you are feeling and have been through it. That made a big difference for me. You'll find alot of support here. Keep reading and posting, it does help.
ForMeForThem is offline  
The Following User Says Thank You to ForMeForThem For This Useful Post:
stime (05-03-2015)
Old 05-03-2015, 12:07 PM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 1,087
Welcome to SR stime.

Settle in, make yourself at home.
TroyW is offline  
The Following User Says Thank You to TroyW For This Useful Post:
stime (05-03-2015)
Old 05-03-2015, 12:08 PM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Member
 
Lily123's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 1,277
Welcome stime Glad you are here.
Lily123 is offline  
The Following User Says Thank You to Lily123 For This Useful Post:
stime (05-03-2015)
Old 05-03-2015, 12:14 PM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
stime's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 55
Thanks everyone. It's so nice to be welcomed and have people to talk to about this. I'm sorry if I babble at first but I may need to. My hands go numb when I drink. I can't feel my pinky or ring finger most of the time anymore but I would drink anyway. I do have a problem. I need to not drink and this will help. It's okay to admit I was having a hard time controlling this and need to stop. It's okay to ask for help. Just thank you all
stime is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to stime For This Useful Post:
Jartsober (05-03-2015), least (05-03-2015), Talz (05-03-2015), TroyW (05-03-2015)
Old 05-03-2015, 12:26 PM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Member
 
PurpleKnight's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,827
Welcome to the Forum Stime!!
PurpleKnight is offline  
Old 05-03-2015, 12:31 PM
  # 9 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: May 2015
Location: Victoria, B.C
Posts: 21
I'm pretty new to this too. It helps to see that you aren't alone in this problem, and the amount of people that have been sober for years.

It must get better.
Talz is offline  
Old 05-03-2015, 01:23 PM
  # 10 (permalink)  
Member
 
ZaBoozer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Johannesburg, Gauteng, South Africa
Posts: 1,371
Originally Posted by stime View Post
Thanks everyone. It's so nice to be welcomed and have people to talk to about this. I'm sorry if I babble at first but I may need to. My hands go numb when I drink. I can't feel my pinky or ring finger most of the time anymore but I would drink anyway. I do have a problem. I need to not drink and this will help. It's okay to admit I was having a hard time controlling this and need to stop. It's okay to ask for help. Just thank you all
Hey stime, the feeling will come back to your fingers. Quicker than you may think. Babble away. It is good to get it out. It's all ok.
ZaBoozer is offline  
Old 05-03-2015, 02:17 PM
  # 11 (permalink)  
Feed your head
 
Soberwolf's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,035
Blog Entries: 4
Hello & Welcome Stime
Soberwolf is offline  
Old 05-03-2015, 02:57 PM
  # 12 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 202,341
Blog Entries: 1
Welcome to SR stime

D
Dee74 is offline  
Old 05-03-2015, 02:58 PM
  # 13 (permalink)  
Member
 
Cauliflower's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Canada
Posts: 691
Welcome!
Cauliflower is offline  
Old 05-03-2015, 03:00 PM
  # 14 (permalink)  
bona fido dog-lover
 
least's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 95,281
Blog Entries: 32
Welcome to the family! You are among people who understand you. I got sober for good over five years ago and don't miss drinking one bit. The rare times I get a thought about drinking, it's vanquished by my rational mind.

Vent away. We understand.
least is online now  
The Following User Says Thank You to least For This Useful Post:
TryTryAgain68 (05-06-2015)
Old 05-03-2015, 03:06 PM
  # 15 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 81
I'm one day in. We can do this!
lesly is offline  
Old 05-03-2015, 03:41 PM
  # 16 (permalink)  
Learning to live again
 
Hevyn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 47,427
Great to meet you stime! It helps to have the understanding of people who get it. No one in my life had any idea what I was going through. We're glad you found us.
Hevyn is offline  
The Following User Says Thank You to Hevyn For This Useful Post:
stime (05-03-2015)
Old 05-03-2015, 04:34 PM
  # 17 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
stime's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 55
Yeah my husband is amazing and supportive but in the past I'm not sure he has been quick to acknowledge the need for outside help because I'm not either . I haven't always been totally honest about my physical symptoms too. I think I have a lot of nerve damage, digestive issues and I've even had trouble breathing well at times when im drunk. Plus, he loves me and doesn't want me to suffer and it has been hard for me in the past to go without booze so we sort of pretend that my drinking isn't really a problem even though I've seen him drunk twice the whole almost three years we've been married and he has seen me drunk twice last week (it's Sunday or it would've been this week)
stime is offline  
Old 05-04-2015, 07:26 PM
  # 18 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 81
Hey good for you! Doctor was good, she wants me to go to AA. Along with SR. Plus monitoring. I'm for anything so long as it helps. Good job again tonight!
lesly is offline  
Old 05-04-2015, 07:40 PM
  # 19 (permalink)  
Member
 
site1Q84's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: California
Posts: 1,914
Welcome stime!

I'm in the exact same boat. Never thought I had a problem for the exact same reasons.

Glad you're here and finding the support and help you need this time around.
site1Q84 is offline  
Old 05-05-2015, 06:22 AM
  # 20 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
stime's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 55
Lesly--what did she meaning by monitoring? I talked to a therapist yesterday that said the same. I'm going to think about going to a meeting today. If I can get myself to not be such a chicken. You?
stime is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:28 PM.