I'm going to need you guys
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 2,937
I'm going to need you guys
Today I found out I am most likely to be made redundant from my job.
I have this playing on repeat in my head..........
'Everything will be okay in the end. If its not okay, its not the end'.
.....................I need you to remind me of this when things get a bit much.
I've been through a lot in the last few years.
Serious health problems and a relationship ending.
I'm a single mum.
I don't know why but this seems to be scaring me more than the health stuff and the relationship stuff did.
I guess its the financial fears I have.
There is sadness for me too. 18 years worked with some of my colleagues.
Its also the fear of being home everyday, on my own, with time to kill.
I've been made redundant before. It was before my drinking took off. It just scares me as I don't think idle times are good when you think and drink like I did.
Thank you in advance xx
I have this playing on repeat in my head..........
'Everything will be okay in the end. If its not okay, its not the end'.
.....................I need you to remind me of this when things get a bit much.
I've been through a lot in the last few years.
Serious health problems and a relationship ending.
I'm a single mum.
I don't know why but this seems to be scaring me more than the health stuff and the relationship stuff did.
I guess its the financial fears I have.
There is sadness for me too. 18 years worked with some of my colleagues.
Its also the fear of being home everyday, on my own, with time to kill.
I've been made redundant before. It was before my drinking took off. It just scares me as I don't think idle times are good when you think and drink like I did.
Thank you in advance xx
It's sad, but it's not the end. Maybe life means to take you in a new and better direction. Don't despair and don't be afraid. Take some time to reflect and think about your new path. You are strong, you will not drink no matter how much free time you get. You will find good use for it now if it comes to that.
Oh sorry this is happening and can imagine it must be pretty scary. Things are usually not as bad as they seem though and you never know what's around the corner, maybe a chance to go in a different direction. If,your worried about idle time why not have a think about things you would have liked to do that you didn't have time when working? Maybe take up some exercise? If you can't afford the gym maybe jogging or exercise vids. Voluntary work can be good too. I used to do work in a homeless shelter in school hols and weekends when in uni and loved it. Gives a sense of purpose and meet lots of very interesting people. Dog shelters are always looking out for ppl to help out and walk the dogs too which is something your little one could do with you too if they're not in school. Just a few things off the top of my head but I'm sure there's more.
I you were going to drink you would do so even if you only had an hour to do so, so your obviously made of strong stuff because you've done it till now. Just don't let this be an excuse because that's what it would be. This is just another challenge to overcome and you will do it and you'll be proud of yourself. Xx
I you were going to drink you would do so even if you only had an hour to do so, so your obviously made of strong stuff because you've done it till now. Just don't let this be an excuse because that's what it would be. This is just another challenge to overcome and you will do it and you'll be proud of yourself. Xx
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 2,937
You are all so right.
Thank you.
I just can't help but think 'I'm going to have so little going for me now. I'm a single mum, an ex drunk, and next I might have no job'.
If someone posted that here about themselves, I would be all over them for feeling like that!! They wouldn't get away with feeling that bad about themselves from me. I would not allow them to feel like that!
I suppose its just strange how your brain works when you could do with being a little bit nice to yourself.
Thank you.
I just can't help but think 'I'm going to have so little going for me now. I'm a single mum, an ex drunk, and next I might have no job'.
If someone posted that here about themselves, I would be all over them for feeling like that!! They wouldn't get away with feeling that bad about themselves from me. I would not allow them to feel like that!
I suppose its just strange how your brain works when you could do with being a little bit nice to yourself.
Hey I'm a single mum and an ex drunk so I have 2 out of three there ;-)
Why not rephrase that as you're a lone parent who is taking care of your child single handedly which is very difficult at times and doing a damn fine job of it plus you're a strong person who has managed to (or is in the process of) overcoming an addiction which is something a lot of people don't manage. Doesn't that show a strong person?
Losing a job is scary but you are not losing it because you turned up drunk and started abusing everyone it's because of redundancy so not a reflection on you. What if you weren't working because you had a rich doctor husband (oh I wish hehe)...would that be having little going for you? You're listening to that internal bully right now and we all know bully's just talk **** to hurt you!! Tell it to shut the hell up because you have a LOT going for you xx
Why not rephrase that as you're a lone parent who is taking care of your child single handedly which is very difficult at times and doing a damn fine job of it plus you're a strong person who has managed to (or is in the process of) overcoming an addiction which is something a lot of people don't manage. Doesn't that show a strong person?
Losing a job is scary but you are not losing it because you turned up drunk and started abusing everyone it's because of redundancy so not a reflection on you. What if you weren't working because you had a rich doctor husband (oh I wish hehe)...would that be having little going for you? You're listening to that internal bully right now and we all know bully's just talk **** to hurt you!! Tell it to shut the hell up because you have a LOT going for you xx
Sasha, if the light at the end of the tunnel is a train coming your way, jump side wards. When one door closes another one slams in your face, I say, take it off its hinges.
You have a setback, but keep moving forward. Watch out for the old AV and kick its butt.
You have a setback, but keep moving forward. Watch out for the old AV and kick its butt.
Across the pond, we call it getting laid off.
Been there, done that. It's not fun but it is survivable.
You're going to be OK, Sasha. You've grown so much and gained so much strength. And on the days when it seems overwhelming, you've got a whole world of people here to help hold you up.
Been there, done that. It's not fun but it is survivable.
You're going to be OK, Sasha. You've grown so much and gained so much strength. And on the days when it seems overwhelming, you've got a whole world of people here to help hold you up.
We will be with you Sasha
If the worst happens, I try to think that endings can be beginnings too.
Some of the best changes in my life has been driven by other people, like when I lost my lease and ended up here in this kickass condo
D
If the worst happens, I try to think that endings can be beginnings too.
Some of the best changes in my life has been driven by other people, like when I lost my lease and ended up here in this kickass condo
D
Sasha you are a smart lady. I don't know what your work is but is it something you could do from home or could your skills be utilised from home if you contracted yourself out. Maybe there is something else you'd like to do that you could work on.
Whatever happens you are you. You're a mother, a skilled worker who has been in the same employment for 18 years, you are a healthy sober woman.
Idle time at home? Really? You'll be preparing for the next stage of your life, looking for a job (or setting one up), running your home, looking after your daughter, getting some exercise, maybe journalling some thoughts, visiting SR and presumably planning some creative stuff.
Everything will indeed be OK.
Whatever happens you are you. You're a mother, a skilled worker who has been in the same employment for 18 years, you are a healthy sober woman.
Idle time at home? Really? You'll be preparing for the next stage of your life, looking for a job (or setting one up), running your home, looking after your daughter, getting some exercise, maybe journalling some thoughts, visiting SR and presumably planning some creative stuff.
Everything will indeed be OK.
Hey Sasha, I know how scary this must be for you. I will share what happened many years ago to me and my husband. I was working part-time and had 2 young kids when he was made redundant from a job he had been doing for 22 years.
We were desperately short of money and he took jobs doing anything...sweeping factory floors, moving glass panels around a showroom etc. it was a hard time. I was suffering from depression in a bad way at the time (nothing to do with his redundancy), so I couldn't work any more than I was.
He applied for absolutely everything. He had held a management position before and this was a total life changing thing for him.
A few months later, he saw a job advertised in a completely different field. He didn't think he stood a chance, a 40+ year old with no experience. Turned out what they were looking for was life experience.
He has been doing it for 7 years now and ABSOLUTELY LOVES it! He would never had thought of this job had he not been made redundant. He has won regional awards for his performance and is an entirely different person.
You never know what's round the corner my friend xxx
We were desperately short of money and he took jobs doing anything...sweeping factory floors, moving glass panels around a showroom etc. it was a hard time. I was suffering from depression in a bad way at the time (nothing to do with his redundancy), so I couldn't work any more than I was.
He applied for absolutely everything. He had held a management position before and this was a total life changing thing for him.
A few months later, he saw a job advertised in a completely different field. He didn't think he stood a chance, a 40+ year old with no experience. Turned out what they were looking for was life experience.
He has been doing it for 7 years now and ABSOLUTELY LOVES it! He would never had thought of this job had he not been made redundant. He has won regional awards for his performance and is an entirely different person.
You never know what's round the corner my friend xxx
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