Rough time tonight.
Adventures In SpaceTime
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,827
Originally Posted by Dee74 
The same things that drove me mad now bring me peace.
They didn't change but I did.
It may not be what you want to hear right now AO - but consider making a gratitude list.
It just might help
Yeah. THIS. Works. Awesomely.
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
I see this AV classic gambit frequently - 'I deserve a break from this, I deserve a drink after this day I just had, I deserve to get drunk right now after that news, blah blah blah'. And my AV is just as wily as anyone else's.
I quash this one, after recognizing that particular AV tone of thought, by realizing that I deserve so much more than a break or a drink or a drunk. I deserve a life without this anxiety and depression and shame and anguish and guilt and sickness that goes with the drink drank drunk. What I deserve is a sober life. I am going to have it, and nothing will ever take that away from me.
You got this going on, AO. Never forget that this is a monumental achievement you are making, you are recreating yourself. You are BADASS, if there ever was one. Onward!
I quash this one, after recognizing that particular AV tone of thought, by realizing that I deserve so much more than a break or a drink or a drunk. I deserve a life without this anxiety and depression and shame and anguish and guilt and sickness that goes with the drink drank drunk. What I deserve is a sober life. I am going to have it, and nothing will ever take that away from me.
You got this going on, AO. Never forget that this is a monumental achievement you are making, you are recreating yourself. You are BADASS, if there ever was one. Onward!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Costa Mesa, CA
Posts: 214
I just want out for a few hours. Out of me. Like, a mini vacation from all of this.
Then I'd go right back at it tomorrow. All tanned and toned and rested.
If I broke down and drank, I know I wouldn't go right back at it...I'd just want to keep drinking...and then...well, the whole cycle all over again!
Sometimes that scares me too! It's fear though that is not nearly as scary as I what I was going through when I was active in my disease and then during withdrawals.
Then I'd go right back at it tomorrow. All tanned and toned and rested.
If I broke down and drank, I know I wouldn't go right back at it...I'd just want to keep drinking...and then...well, the whole cycle all over again!
Sometimes that scares me too! It's fear though that is not nearly as scary as I what I was going through when I was active in my disease and then during withdrawals.
That bell or bike person
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: london
Posts: 4,978
The more you nail the "av" the less power it has in my experience .. not heard from mine in a long time but i'm prepared any time it wants , none of the reasoned arguments for sobriety have changed only got more powerful because dealing with the up's and down's of life has become far more manageable these days .
I think sometimes the power of the "av" is proportional to our own addiction ambivalence . I'm glad you persevered , For me by taking the option off the table completely i feel it shortened the cravings . The longest i had lasted 6 days and other than going to work i just sat it out in bed listening to talk radio .. i am willing to do that again for a month , for a year for a lifetime, it knows that , it doesn't seem to bother me anymore (i'm ready if it does) and i can get on with living life as best i can .
Bestwishes, m
I think sometimes the power of the "av" is proportional to our own addiction ambivalence . I'm glad you persevered , For me by taking the option off the table completely i feel it shortened the cravings . The longest i had lasted 6 days and other than going to work i just sat it out in bed listening to talk radio .. i am willing to do that again for a month , for a year for a lifetime, it knows that , it doesn't seem to bother me anymore (i'm ready if it does) and i can get on with living life as best i can .
Bestwishes, m
AlmA
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Marbella Spain
Posts: 714
Dear Alpha,
We all have to accept there are bad days... but there are good days too.
It is hard... But can cope with it!!!
Think today is a bad day but I know it will not last...
it is temporal it passes by...
go to bed when you are going mad...
have a shower...
Write your thoughts down...
but you can do sports... is the best to get out of the system the stress...
come here...
Next day you get up better...
I hope you feel better soon.
All our support...
We all have to accept there are bad days... but there are good days too.
It is hard... But can cope with it!!!
Think today is a bad day but I know it will not last...
it is temporal it passes by...
go to bed when you are going mad...
have a shower...
Write your thoughts down...
but you can do sports... is the best to get out of the system the stress...
come here...
Next day you get up better...
I hope you feel better soon.
All our support...
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Melbourne, Victoria Australia
Posts: 1,202
Hope you're feeling a bit better Alpha.
Not to minimise at all what you felt, but I was struck by the sheer sort of black comedy of PTCapote's thing [which I'll gloss a little]:
'I like a good existential crisis every now and again'. PT of course went on to remark how it doesn't have to stay that way. But the remark itself is one of the hallmarks of SR's best: serious Life-with-Suffering-thrown-in, combined with a good bracing dry wit. SR has so often been literally a breath of fresh air when the Life-with-Suffering part gets too dominant for me.
xxx
Vic
Not to minimise at all what you felt, but I was struck by the sheer sort of black comedy of PTCapote's thing [which I'll gloss a little]:
'I like a good existential crisis every now and again'. PT of course went on to remark how it doesn't have to stay that way. But the remark itself is one of the hallmarks of SR's best: serious Life-with-Suffering-thrown-in, combined with a good bracing dry wit. SR has so often been literally a breath of fresh air when the Life-with-Suffering part gets too dominant for me.
xxx
Vic
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Washington, DC
Posts: 987
Thanks Vic, I try for a little levity but worry sometimes I am too dark...thanks for not finding it so.
And I did pick up a lot of my dry wit spending years around Aussies so I learned from the best
Always love your posts too, you're very positive.
xoxo
And I did pick up a lot of my dry wit spending years around Aussies so I learned from the best
Always love your posts too, you're very positive.
xoxo
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