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Old 07-04-2013, 12:58 AM
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Moderation...

Did a test yesterday, took a glass of wine, decided that at least an hour has to pass before taking another one. I realized that when drinking slowly the craving doesn´t come in the same way, I actually found it kind of useless to drink at all, just got tired and depressed. But didn´t have more that two glasses. But I feel much better without any alcohol at all, and that is what I will go for. All this moderation-stuff just takes energy, I´m tired of thinking about alcohol. Leaving it all together seems to be a better way. I know I won´t be able to stick to just two glasses another time.
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Old 07-04-2013, 01:13 AM
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For me i cannot have one otherwise it might chance opening the door to all that obsession and crazyness .
With moderation it was like having half a sneeze and i was always chomping at the bit to achieve the full experience .

Bestwishes, m
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Old 07-04-2013, 01:50 AM
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Moderation even when i could pullit off was too much hassle. When it boils down to it I drank for the buzz. Take that away and it s a pointless excercise.

As it turns out i could never sustain moderation for more than a while, and that capacity fiminished over time.
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Old 07-04-2013, 02:05 AM
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I don't even think in terms of just having a few glasses. Like, I don't care if my wine matches my meat, I just want the booze to get drunk. That is the bottom line for me. I think in terms of having bottles, not a few glasses. So I know I will never be able to moderate. It took me a while to accept it though. It didn't happen over night.
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Old 07-04-2013, 02:38 AM
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Originally Posted by Victoria74 View Post
All this moderation-stuff just takes energy...
It was the same for me. I hated social functions where alcohol was served because I would be watching everyone's drinks to know how fast was appropriate to drink mine, thinking all the time about the bottle waiting for me at home. I would also feel like I'd been deprived, and hit it twice as hard the next night to make up for it.

Good for you for making the choice to go without.
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Old 07-04-2013, 05:10 AM
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Good post Victoria. Got me to thinking about all the times and ways I attempted moderation - and how they all failed within a few days!

I'm at 106 days today and the craving is much easier to ignore.

Looking forward to enjoying a SOBER 4th of July!
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Old 07-04-2013, 05:19 AM
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There is a story in the BB that I associate with.

Crossing the River of Denial
"She finally realized that when she enjoyed her drinking, she couldn’t control it, and when she controlled it, she couldn’t enjoy it."

Towards the end that pretty much says it all for me.
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Old 07-04-2013, 08:18 AM
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So true. It's not fun to drink......while obsessing about how much you are drinking ? What you are drinking ? Is this worse than that ? Am I gonna feel horrible tomorrow ? If I drink today and then wait three days its ok to drink again ?

I just relapsed with 2 beers one day 2 beers the next. I wasn't drinking, I was conducting elaborate debates in my mind while staring at a bottle....then felt like crap.

For me right now done is done
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Old 07-04-2013, 09:31 AM
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Similarly, I found having a few glasses of wine, or even one, just made me edgy, and want more...it was a very uncomfortable feeling, like I wanted to finish what I started, which meant getting drunk...so that I find it 100 times easier not to want another drink, if I don't have that first drink. Moderating makes me feel like I'm on pins and needles, all antsy and agitated.
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Old 07-04-2013, 09:51 AM
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I don't even like the idea of moderation when it comes to mind alternating things. For me..food, yes, work and play, yes, drinking...no. That's not me. I was made for whatever reason that I like going numb on most occasions when I start drinking alcohol. 98% of the time. The other 2% was just a fluke that had more to do with it was just the rare occassion I didnt have the energy to go the distance on that particular day.

Just the way I was made just like I was made to be tall. I'm not going to waste any energy worrying about controlling or trying to change something I can't that doesnt do me any good anyway. It is what it is. I can try to fool myself into believing different but it won't change the outcome. I will still get drunk and I will still be tall.

I like being tall. I also like not being a drunk. I'm just fine with that.
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Old 07-04-2013, 12:38 PM
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Pretty much every alcoholic has stories about being able to technically moderate- the problem is its pretty much never enjoyable and will always lead back to the same spot.
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Old 07-04-2013, 04:31 PM
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I tried having just 1 pint of beer an hour.....Shame there's 24 hours in a day....
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Old 07-04-2013, 11:51 PM
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Good point. 24 beers a day is quite a lot :-)
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Old 07-05-2013, 12:43 AM
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Moderation would never work for me either. I drank/drink to stop my mind from working. So that means drinking a lot, and drinking it fast. The biggest drawback with this is I was always going to lose control of what I doing, saying and my ability to function in any normal capacity.
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Old 07-05-2013, 02:07 AM
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Always found the notion of moderation bizzare to the extent that if I was in a situation in which I could only have one or two drinks I would not have them because it seemed pointless and only left me feeling restless, irritable and discontented.

Only downside to this was that I convinced myself for years, even decades, that because I could do this then I was not an alcoholic. Makes me smile now
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