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AA meetings or no?

Old 05-09-2013, 11:21 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Im only 4 days sober but I know that I wouldnt be without AA Not that I get it or am working the steps yet (well yes I am at step 1) but I feel the HUMAN personal contact is HUGE. I definatley feel the want to have someone teach me a guide me and look into my eyes and hear a voice on the phone. I definaltley need that.
WTG 10 days is great!!!
Oh and with AA they say you should go to meetings once a day for 90 days. I think becuase it takes 90 days to form a habit (That I learned in Weight Watchers lol) Go online and look at the meetings schdl They are everywhere even midnight and 7 am meetings. I have 3 kids and work so I know what you mean but if you have the desire to go try it out even if just once. What do you have to loose!
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Old 05-09-2013, 11:22 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by tomsteve View Post
good to see ya lookin for help. when i got into AA, i had finally found my home and family.
you may want to google "big book online and read it. it is the boook that lays out our program of action to help us get and sytay sober.
theres also online meetings. if interested, drop me a PM and i can show ya where i het online meetings. formatted just like face to face meeting, but no cams and,well, online. but awesome sobriety from all around the world.
Thanks Tomsteve! I actually already bought the Big Book and started reading it the other night. Trying to get my hands on anything that might help:-)
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Old 05-09-2013, 11:39 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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Jason Vale
Kick the Drink Easily
(you can download it from B&N or amazon)
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Old 05-09-2013, 11:40 AM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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AA has kept me sober now for almost 29 years. A whole lot has happened in those 29 years, things I never expected nor considered my first few years in recovery. I'm certain I wouldn't still be sober if not for my involvement.
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Old 05-09-2013, 11:54 AM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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I did SR, meditation, and yoga for my first 75 days or so. Once there I felt like I'd gotten through the "just don't drink" phase and into the "rebuild" phase, so I've started seeing an addiction counselor once a week.

I've been to 3 in person meetings and like the people there, I think I'm planning to integrate them as kind of a back up method when I'm feeling particularly restless... or who knows, maybe more down the line, maybe less. I think as long as you know what your priority is (living well & sober), not only can you use any different method, you can use many different methods at once!
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Old 05-09-2013, 12:03 PM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Dollyangel17 View Post
Thanks Tomsteve! I actually already bought the Big Book and started reading it the other night. Trying to get my hands on anything that might help:-)
what amazed me when i started reading it is that it was written about me....28 years before i was born.
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Old 05-09-2013, 12:11 PM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Joe Nerv View Post
AA has kept me sober now for almost 29 years. A whole lot has happened in those 29 years, things I never expected nor considered my first few years in recovery. I'm certain I wouldn't still be sober if not for my involvement.
Out of curiosity ( and I understand completely if you don't want to respond due to a personal nature ), what kind of things happened later in your sobriety ( after the first few years ) that you never expected or considered? Granted many of us haven't come close to multiple years of sobriety, but it would be interesting to know what kinds of things might happen years from now that we wouldn't even have considered.
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Old 05-09-2013, 12:16 PM
  # 28 (permalink)  
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Let's try to keep focused on the member's original post:

"Anyway...my question is this: Are others out there NOT going to meetings and still doing okay? I feel like this SR board is helping a lot and was hoping it would be enough. Thoughts?"
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Old 05-09-2013, 12:28 PM
  # 29 (permalink)  
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I know people in real life who have years sober, are content and do not go to AA but personally, I need the rooms and the feedback and support of other alcoholics.
Just wanted to mention that if finding a baby sitter is an issue, most AA meetings are kid friendly. Several of my home group members will bring in their grandbabies or kids when there is no one to watch them at home and my old home group actually had a set of legos and coloring books to keep the little ones busy. So if you are interested in the twelves steps, don t let being a mother stop you. Many moms with limited resources have become sober in AA
Congratulations on 10 days and keep up the good work
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Old 05-09-2013, 12:37 PM
  # 30 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Dollyangel17 View Post
Anyway...my question is this: Are others out there NOT going to meetings and still doing okay?
Yes, there are plenty. AA is not the only path to sobriety.
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Old 05-09-2013, 12:51 PM
  # 31 (permalink)  
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I've been sober 2 and a half years and I don't go to AA meetings. I find a lot of value reading and posting here. Welcome!
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Old 05-09-2013, 12:54 PM
  # 32 (permalink)  
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I go to one regular AA meeting a week. I've missed only a handful in my first year of sobriety. At the beginning I was struggling against the program (god thing) and I still haven't worked the steps. I was really having a hard time at about the three month mark, and fortunately I had some time off work so I could attend almost daily meetings for a couple of weeks. It was my limited schedule equivalent of 90 in 90 and really helped me through a rough patch. The good thing about AA is you can take what you need and leave the rest. The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking. No one forces you to do anything - it's not a cult, or a religion, despite the ever present rituals.

The real benefit I find from meetings is being around other people that have the same thoughts and feelings toward alcohol. Just shutting up and listening helped me identify the alcoholic traits in my life. It also helps me to understand that the drink I had over a year ago, truly must be my last drink. Spending time with other drunks in meetings helps me to continue to be honest with myself.

Whatever path you chose I wish you well in your sobriety.
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Old 05-09-2013, 12:57 PM
  # 33 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by ScottFromWI View Post
Out of curiosity ( and I understand completely if you don't want to respond due to a personal nature ), what kind of things happened later in your sobriety ( after the first few years ) that you never expected or considered? Granted many of us haven't come close to multiple years of sobriety, but it would be interesting to know what kinds of things might happen years from now that we wouldn't even have considered.
A lot of the things are too complex to get into right now, I'm at work... But quickly and most importantly I guess is that somewhere around the 10 year mark, sobriety for a period of time started to lose its importance to me. It dropped bigtime on the ol priority list. A few friends of mine decided they wanted to drink again, and were doing so successfully for a while (they wound up back in AA). I was playing a lot of music, dating, succeeding and moving forward in a lot of ways. I drifted away from AA, and started thinking on occasion that it wouldn't be all that big a deal if had some drinks now and then. Still having some connections in the program, I was convinced into getting my butt back into meetings, and I recommitted.

The other more complex stuff has to do with hitting a major sober bottom at around the 20 year mark. I got hit with some life events I wasnt ready to handle, and without AAs support I feel I would have just said screw this. I didn't have a compulsion to drink I believe only because of my involvement with the steps and AA, but this was a period of my life where I didn't care much about anything. While not really suicidal, I'd have welcomed death. I grew through that. I'm happy today.

There are countless other occasions where I believe I would have drank if not for the AA voices in my head, and other investments I have in my sobriety. I've written about many of them in other posts here. A time I was with a beautiful woman holding a drink to my lips where my refusal meant I was going home alone... And I really didn't want to go home alone. The time I picked up the wrong drink and after taking a sip could have easily just finished the job. The time I was in Russia and the band I was with was being toasted by some big industry people who absolutely insisted I drink. To not drink was insulting them, so I faked it.

AA gave me tools for situations like that. Gave me tools to function without alcohol as a crutch, or pacifier. I could go on and on and on... I'm grateful for all AA has given me and haven't a single regret for ever declaring myself a member.
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Old 05-09-2013, 01:02 PM
  # 34 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Joe Nerv View Post
A lot of the things are too complex to get into right now, I'm at work... But quickly and most importantly I guess is that somewhere around the 10 year mark, sobriety for a period of time started to lose its importance to me. It dropped bigtime on the ol priority list. A few friends of mine decided they wanted to drink again, and were doing so successfully for a while (they wound up back in AA). I was playing a lot of music, dating, succeeding and moving forward in a lot of ways. I drifted away from AA, and started thinking on occasion that it wouldn't be all that big a deal if had some drinks now and then. Still having some connections in the program, I was convinced into getting my butt back into meetings, and I recommitted.

The other more complex stuff has to do with hitting a major sober bottom at around the 20 year mark. I got hit with some life events I wasntl ready to handle, and without AAs support I feel I would have just said screw this. I didn't have a compulsion to drink I believe only because of my involvement with the steps and AA, but this was a period of my life where I didn't care much about anything. While not really suicidal, I'd have welcomed death. I grew through that. I'm happy today.

There are countless other occasions where I believe I would have drank if not for the AA voices in my head, and other investments I have in my sobriety. I've written about many of them in other posts here. A time I was with a beautiful woman holding a drink to my lips where my refusal meant I was going home alone... And I really didn't want to. The time I picked up the wrong drink and after taking a sip could have easily just finished the job. The time I was in Russia and the band I was with was being toasted by some big industry people who absolutely insisted I drink. To not drink was insulting them, so I faked it.

AA gave me tools for situations like that. Gave me tools to function without alcohol as a crutch, or pacifier. I could go on and on and on... I'm grateful for all AA has given me and haven't a single regret for ever declaring myself a member.
Thanks for sharing. I was in no way questioning your membership or the validity of AA, just curious about what kind of things you didn't forsee. For the OP ( and all of us ) I think think your response reinforces the individual commitment long term to battle this thing, no matter what method of recovery you choose.
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Old 05-09-2013, 01:10 PM
  # 35 (permalink)  
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< Going on 5 years sober here, I did not use AA/NA in my recovery. I had to do something though, and I opted for individual counseling to iron out some of the wrinkles
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Old 05-09-2013, 01:12 PM
  # 36 (permalink)  
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I am not planning on going to AA. I tried a couple meetings and it just isn't for me. I think I have enough of a support system in place that I will be able to do without it. However, I have nothing but respect for people who do go to AA. They know what they need to do and are willing to do it.
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