BillyPilgrim

Keep in there ****, it gets better.

heathersweeds

Hello Cori-
I went through the same feelings you are having with SR. I had to call my sponcor and walk away from the computor. Everybody's level of recovery is different. Also balance for us alcoholics, is any situation is hard. Try to remember a post from your thread is just that. The power you give it, is what matters. There are a lot of different personalities here. Sometimes I have to just let it go. We are powerless over people and what they have to say.I an going through a huge growing pain in my recovery. Where God is showing me a lot of self-centeredness mirrored back at me. And it hurts. what does it hurt really? My ego. God has been right there with me smiling. I think you are working hard and doing great! I hope you don't leave cause we all learn from each others character deffects. And boy do I have them lol!

Lost3000

Interesting posts. I too remember you saying anger was your trigger. You sound angry. But I'm not really hearing your tone or body language - so I might be wrong. I don't think anyone here was attacking you. Although I know where you are coming from. I too reacted the same way when I first got on here, and then later realized that others here who have years of sobriety obviously knew something I didn't - as I do not have years of sobriety.

I found your analogy of an obese person and a marathon as ironically going against your idea of a test. It took me 10 years to get overweight, and it'll take me at least half that to lose the weight. An obese person isn't even going to be up to walking quickly for a mile, let alone strolling. So I don't see how someone who's been boozing it up for years is ready hang out around booze after a mere 6 days. That's like a smoker who's quit for 6 days deciding to enter a hookah room as a "test". Or someone addicted to sugar hanging out in a cupcake store after quitting sugar for 6 days. Just doesn't make a lot of sense.

I don't see any "tests" in this - I see myself working towards having a new life, a sober life. And I don't see myself creating a new life in 6 days, or even 6 mos. It took years for us to become who we are. And alcohol addiction is so complex. If all drunks could quit for 6 days and then all of a sudden poof! be able to hang out in bars then I doubt we'd have the millions alone in just this country (USA) addicted to booze. Just sayin'.

I liked your post and I do suspect you were angry. Hopefully you won't delete your account and will come back and hang with us. Post about your ups and downs. Because that's what life is anyways, isn't it?

Lost3000

Forgot to mention that, my husband and I were talking this morning about my alcoholism and comparing it to smokers. He quit smoking cold turkey 10 years ago. He said there's no way he could hang out in a smoker's lounge after 6 days smoke free. He also said, that there are times even now that he sometimes thinks, hey, a cig sounds good. But that he knows if he were to smoke one now there'd be no end, he'd be right back at smoking.

Dee74

I hope you remember the door is always open for a return CorgiDad.

The fact that so many people took time out to respond to you should be the thing you take away from this I think - I know not everyone presented their responses in a way you'd like, but this is a big place...

I was furious with a lot of people when I got here - later I realised they, by and large anyway, really were trying to help - it wasn't the way I'd do it maybe, but then my way thus far hadn't been that crash hot....

I wish you well with whatever you decide

D

Dee74

That's why supports important I think ****

I've been where you are - 5 years on is a milestone I couldn't have dreamt of then.
I did lot of work myself - but I wouldn't be here without support.

Don't be afraid to reach out when you need to

D

wheresthefun

Good lesson here for a lot of folks: Think twice before saying something like this, and ask yourself, are your ready for the answers that aren't going to be exactly what you want to hear? If not, it's probably best to move on.

DoinThis

I didn't think the posts were negative corgidad. I recommended going out because that's what I wanted to do too but others likened it to dropping a kid in a lolly shop and telling them don't touch. They shared because they didn't want to see u FAIL not because they did!

My first post here was about a wedding I was going to and how to not drink. The majority of responses here were 'don't go'. I was like AS IF! But guess what....I drank! People here know because they've been there done that.

I think this place is awesome. I'm not sure if even your AA friends would've been supportive about u being around booze on day 6 either. Anyway I hope u continue to be sober in whatever way works for u.

Corgis ROCK!

Lost3000

That's a really good way of saying it, and exactly how I feel - both about this post and responses to my own threads.

Sapling

I don't think anybody here would offer advice to see anyone fail or harm themselves....Speaking for myself...And I'm sure others here feel the same way....Alcohol destroyed a good part of my life and almost ended it...The last thing I want to see is someone put their sobriety...Whether 1 day or 10 years...In jeopardy....I just don't like seeing that....I think if you were getting advice like...Great idea...See if you can get a seat at the bar....Or....Go during happy hour...It's cheaper and a lot more crowded....Then you might have a reason to pack your bags and leave....I don't see much of that here. You can't make em all happy....Maybe a seed was planted that may sprout some other day....Who knows?

freshstart57

Congratulations on your victory at the restaurant, CorgiDad. I bet that made you feel like a million bucks! I know that feeling, about needing to re-establish myself, about wanting to know that I was going to be OK.

I had been sober for 5 days, it was Sunday afternoon, a time when historically I was out of booze and would make some excuse for a short errand run. I needed something from the hardware store, across the street from my liquor store. I told my wife where I was going and why, and she asked me if I was sure that I wanted to do this, to put myself there, the same way I had done before, week after week after week.

I can remember feeling that I wanted to challenge myself, to show myself that I could actually pass by a liquor store when I had no booze at home. I had a plan, I had with me a printed page, 30 Reasons to Stop Drinking, and I read this before I left home. I passed that milestone with flying colors, and all of the rest of them too. I know now that I will always pass these challenges. I don't want to seek them out, but I will not let them continue to deprive me of my life, of what is now a serene and peace filled life.

I wish you continued success on your journey, CorgiDad. Best to you.

KaliCali

I have bee thinking of CorgiDad again.
Even if he did ask for opinions, he might have inadvertently been hoping for support. As an overly sensitive newbie myself, I didn't post for weeks because I was afraid somebody would say the "wrong" thing, still kind of am. When I am feeling stronger I will have the defenses that these are just opinions, I'll try to stay open and most people mean well.
I don't think anyone posted anything inflammatory, but be sensitive with us newbies. For how long? Dunno. We need to build up some muscle and take on the world out there with some tools. It actually was a nice diverse response.
And thanks Freshstart for the 30 reasons list. I'll have to make one (might cheat from a thread I saw around here somewhere). I'll have to go to town tomorrow and the grocery store, which will be were I picked up all my "necessities".