artsoul

Sounds like you're doing all the right things - congrats on day 5! It really does feel strange at first - I felt like a fish out of water for a week or two (had some brain fog, too, which doesn't help).

Take things as they come - each day will bring new hope and healing!

Maus

What did the doctor said?!
congratulations on your efforts!!!

ovrock

Congrats lost, ur doing it!!!

losteverything

thank you, Ovrock...I am doing it, one hour at a time, day 6 today, and I WILL make a week tomorrow. I was called in to see the doctor tonight, but am mentally preparing myself for that. 3 days ago, i was prescribed 4 Valium per day, I have only taken 3 in total. Still sweaty, a bit less shakey, and know that I never have to go through this again..heck, i dont think i could make it through another one...will keep posting, it seems to soothe me some..thanks all

losteverything

Often, I read in the Friends and Family of Alcoholics forum and think, My God ( i dont believe in God, but you know what I mean) I did all those things and affected people in my life in exactly the same way. How Dare I? Was I so selfish and self absorbed that I couldn't see how much I was hurting others as much as myself? How I lost everything, and was so obliviously self centered that I merely continued into hell? Shameful...unmanly, cowardly, childish..just my thought for the moment. I know the past is in the past, but the past also should teach lessons for a better tomorrrow. My brain has been beat up so long, and its a muscle too...I should do a complete workout, not just my body...

Marius76

@losteverything
A big thank you to you for this post, really has helped me, I gave up also on Jan 1 and was having slight doubts as to whether I should continue.
Lying here awake at 2am, wondering if it's worth the pain of quitting? But reading your posts have truly helped me, and the last few nights have been getting better, tomorrow it will be one whole week, and I've not managed that since god knows when!

Keep us informed how you are getting on, and keep up the good work.

One other thing, waking up without a hangover is actually turning out to be addictive!

pangur

I hear you Marius about the hangovers, yesterday I ventured out to meet a few friends for coffee, good friends, but we all used to party hard together. After coffee and lunch we all went back to one of the guys apartments and almost immediately everyone was drinking beer or whisky and coke. I had juice and said my goodbyes as the guys were leaving to hit the bars in town. They were psyched for a great night out and part of me thought for a second "I'm doing fine so far, I'll go out and not drink", but I know deep down that it would just end up a night of drunken mayhem. Today I woke up refreshed, alert and feeling great, the guys spent a small fortune and feel like crap today, usually I would too, but I would continue drinking.

@ losteverything, the first week is terrible, you're nearly there. In a couple more days your body will start to say a big "thank you", it feels great.

Cascabel

Losteverything, I am pulling for you in your new found sobriety. I admire anyone who can do what you are doing; it takes real inner strength. You will be a completely new person when you put the worst of withdrawal behind you and you will be proud of yourself for having done it. Just keep gritting your teeth and hanging on; as a lot of us here know, it is worth the effort.

losteverything

Hello all, and thank you for your welcome support. This morning is Day 7..woke up still foggy headed, but sober, and proud of myself so far. Saw the g/f off for her work, after making her a coffee...now I sit here with a nice cup of tea, when it used to be a vodka..can you believe, it used to be a big glass of vodka first thing in the morning? the wood stove is sparkling brightly, dog at my feet, and soon I will be filling the crock pot with a barbequed pork stew..(i hate peeling potatoes, but love to cook) Doctors appointment at 12, and I actually had a pretty good sleep with little sweating. I really have this site to give kudo's to, you all good people help me so much..thank you.

Marius76

Good to hear Mr Losteverything! Sounds like you've really reached a turning point, without realizing it there's a real positive and confident tone to your last post and it is inspiring. At this rate you will have to change your name to foundeverything.

I also had a far better nights sleep yesterday and have really enjoyed a sober Saturday, the day seems so long, and there's so much time to do things, and not do things, perfect! Just as long as I keep away from temptation.

It's one week and I hear on here that's the toughest period to get through.

losteverything

thanks, Marius....
its actually feels good getting things done around the house. Honestly, I dont know how my g/f put up with me just sitting on the couch all day, drinking as much as i could, Zombie-like, becoming dumber by the minute, and sometimes downright ornery. This skin I am wearing now seems strange and unfamiliar, yet there are residue memories of life being like this, way back before my drinking career. Here is a kick, I actually went into the Liquor Store yesterday, which is just a 5 minute walk away, and told them that I am an alcoholic, so please dont sell me anymore booze..they smiled, said we know, and thats great, we wont....made me smile too...have a great saturday everyone..

Tippingpoint

Great stuff...inspirational story!

You've got me cheering for you.

losteverything

Went to my doctor, because he called me in. He proceeded to say that he will be going to Health Canada and my Employer, relating to them that I have undergone seizures due to alcohol withdrawal, that he is strongly recommending Rehab, and mandatory AA meetings. He said he is legally obligated to do so, because I work in a Safety sensitive job. I told him I have quit for a week, and intend to keep on doing so, but he couldn't be swayed. I was freaked out, so I phoned my OIC on his weekend, crying, and explained everything. He reassured me not to worry, that we would be able to work things out, that my job has never suffered, I have never been even remotely impaired at work, and that he trusts me, that he would help anyway possible, and that my job definately isn't in jeopardy. He even suggested that maybe he could arrange to have the Government to pay for the Rehab, if that is what I needed, and he really made me feel better. What a devastating mess Alcohol leaves in its wake. I will follow orders, i will do whatever needs to be done, and I WILL recover. thanks for reading.

losteverything

the beginning of day 8...coffee is on, the rest of the household still asleep, its quiet, peaceful, and no hangover, no unbalance...heck, seems even my dog likes me more now...today, I wont drink..I dont think that is a bad decision at all..

losteverything

Day 9...the shakes are pretty well gone, sleeping better(i think) sweating seems to have subsided...the day holds a whole realm of possibilities, save one...I wont be drinking today. Maybe things are actually changing..for the better.

desertsong

You are an inspiration. Thank you. Day 10 here and I can so relate to all of the things you've said. Keep it up - you are doing beautifully.

Marius76

@Losteverything; Good to hear the shakes are gone and you are sticking with it. It takes immense will power to do this, friend of mine buckled under the strain on Saturday and couldn't resist a beer, then two, then three... I resisted and feel so much better about myself as a result. It is not a competition I know, but the more time passes, the more determined I become to beat this habit, sounds like you are too... SO KEEP GOING!!!

losteverything

End of day 9...still going...this just might work.

JimH

Great Job Lost.
Don't let your guard down. You might find that after you think you're in the clear, which is when a heavy craving will hit you.
Over time it will get easier.
After 5 months I'm not getting cravings for alcohol but anxiety attacks and cravings for sweets.

Just hang in there. You're definitely not Alone.

recoverywfaith

Been following your story. You are doing great...keep that sense of humor it will take you along way in life. Congrats and thank you for sharing.