How do you get excited about life again?
Grateful Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: MI
Posts: 1,080
I feel like I'm in the same boat right now. The craving to drink is gone, but so are alot of positive feelings I used to have. I'm finding it hard to do the things I used to enjoy, while drinking or not! But I do have faith that as time goes on, and I adjust to a "new normal" things will get better again. Hang in there.
i've done my almost
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 1,934
I also think it's as simple as we're never going to get that instant "high" as our drugs and/or alcohol gave us, ever again.
We need to find new ways to enjoy life and our expectations need to be adjusted. This is by no means saying we're not going to have fun, laugh, etc... It's just going to be different and never the same again (but isn't that sort of the point?).
We need to find new ways to enjoy life and our expectations need to be adjusted. This is by no means saying we're not going to have fun, laugh, etc... It's just going to be different and never the same again (but isn't that sort of the point?).
Re-Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Colorado Springs, Colorado
Posts: 7,583
Julez,
Amen I am feeling a bit like you express too. I started out with a bang and energy and my first workout in the gym I pulled a chest muscle and have not gone back since and it has long since healed. I don't have that buzz making the mundane seem more than it is. I think that perhaps we are taking the not being ill every morning a bit for granted maybe. At least for me I can get out and do something. If I choose not to change me and work on my skills then I'll still take being sober and healthy over drinking. And trust me I have been dealing with major life issues and losses in the last month.
I think for some of us it is a grief process and can take a lot longer some than it might for some others. We might be grieving the loss of our old buddies the cans and bottles. Some follks in grief are numb for a year others shake it off much sooner and some never get over it.
Whether it takes me a year and I have P.A.W.S. I'll take it over waking up toxic and ill any day of the week.
I do have days when I feel real joy, and get things done so maybe I am not feeling as much of a loss as you, but I can relate.
I can't instantly turn off the bad feelings and ignore them like I did drinking. It can be a little unsettling to brave the world without the sword of alcohol and the shield of alcohol induced apathy and have to deal with life in the moment. I'll take that too over drinking and illness!
Don't feel alone, and remember, I drank for decades, it won't reverse completely in a few months. But it is getting better every day in tiny increments now.
Hope we both get back to not only 100% but 150%.
Good luck!
Amen I am feeling a bit like you express too. I started out with a bang and energy and my first workout in the gym I pulled a chest muscle and have not gone back since and it has long since healed. I don't have that buzz making the mundane seem more than it is. I think that perhaps we are taking the not being ill every morning a bit for granted maybe. At least for me I can get out and do something. If I choose not to change me and work on my skills then I'll still take being sober and healthy over drinking. And trust me I have been dealing with major life issues and losses in the last month.
I think for some of us it is a grief process and can take a lot longer some than it might for some others. We might be grieving the loss of our old buddies the cans and bottles. Some follks in grief are numb for a year others shake it off much sooner and some never get over it.
Whether it takes me a year and I have P.A.W.S. I'll take it over waking up toxic and ill any day of the week.
I do have days when I feel real joy, and get things done so maybe I am not feeling as much of a loss as you, but I can relate.
I can't instantly turn off the bad feelings and ignore them like I did drinking. It can be a little unsettling to brave the world without the sword of alcohol and the shield of alcohol induced apathy and have to deal with life in the moment. I'll take that too over drinking and illness!
Don't feel alone, and remember, I drank for decades, it won't reverse completely in a few months. But it is getting better every day in tiny increments now.
Hope we both get back to not only 100% but 150%.
Good luck!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 3,095
Originally Posted by Sasha4 
Keith - can you explain how your life has got better?
The other day I was sitting in my office and the building air handlers were shut off for some maintenance. The silence was overwhelming. I have this vague notion that there is a HVAC system in the building, but I don't pay much attention to it. It's just a constant source of background noise, that is so familiar that I don't even notice it. Until that background noise is not there anymore.
That's kind of like my life. That constant background noise, underlying current of fear, jealousy, resentment, and self-pity is gone. And I am only aware that it was even there in the first place, when I can recognize the absence of it.
All of the external things are way better, but that's not really what I'm talking about. My life has a sense of purpose today. I can be useful to others. I am responsible to friends and family, to my employer. I'm not plagued by doubt or uncertainty. I don't have regrets or remorse about my past. There isn't a place on Earth I can't go and not feel comfortable. I can look the world in the eye and not feel less than or better than anyone. I have a feeling of peace and calmness. I'm not reliant on the actions or opinions of others for my happiness. I have a powerful, deep feeling of gratitude and desire to be helpful to others.
When I got sober, all I wanted was to quit drinking and get my life back. What happened was a completely new life.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
Hi amie
I'm an alcoholic but it took me a long time to get excited about things too.
It took me a long time to heal, physically and mentally, from my madness for a start.
It also took me a while to get that gettting sober wasn't a cure-all or a magic wand...
I was a mess as a drunk, & now I was a sober mess LOL....
I had a lot more work to do on myself and my life before I felt happy or content.
I think the suggestion to see your doctor is a good one - meds can be tricky.
I also think the suggestion to shake things up a bit, maybe get some exercise, find a hobby is a good idea too.
I'm under a type of house arrest too - I'm disabled and don't get out much...but my life is full - I literally do not have time to do all the things I want to do.
I used to sit at home and watch TV and drink - now I have a million things going at once - the difference is I looked for things to do, I trusted things would get better, and I gave it all some time...
Don't give up. Stay clean, keep looking for the joy - and you'll find it amie
D
I'm an alcoholic but it took me a long time to get excited about things too.
It took me a long time to heal, physically and mentally, from my madness for a start.
It also took me a while to get that gettting sober wasn't a cure-all or a magic wand...
I was a mess as a drunk, & now I was a sober mess LOL....
I had a lot more work to do on myself and my life before I felt happy or content.
I think the suggestion to see your doctor is a good one - meds can be tricky.
I also think the suggestion to shake things up a bit, maybe get some exercise, find a hobby is a good idea too.
I'm under a type of house arrest too - I'm disabled and don't get out much...but my life is full - I literally do not have time to do all the things I want to do.
I used to sit at home and watch TV and drink - now I have a million things going at once - the difference is I looked for things to do, I trusted things would get better, and I gave it all some time...
Don't give up. Stay clean, keep looking for the joy - and you'll find it amie
D
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,784
All of the external things are way better, but that's not really what I'm talking about. My life has a sense of purpose today. I can be useful to others. I am responsible to friends and family, to my employer. I'm not plagued by doubt or uncertainty. I don't have regrets or remorse about my past. There isn't a place on Earth I can't go and not feel comfortable. I can look the world in the eye and not feel less than or better than anyone. I have a feeling of peace and calmness. I'm not reliant on the actions or opinions of others for my happiness. I have a powerful, deep feeling of gratitude and desire to be helpful to others.
When I got sober, all I wanted was to quit drinking and get my life back. What happened was a completely new life
When I got sober, all I wanted was to quit drinking and get my life back. What happened was a completely new life
THat's how I feel since I adopted my new sober attitude of gratitude.
I am responsible for my own happiness, it comes from within and only I can put it there. I can choose to be miserable or I can choose to be happy. Now that I'm sane again
I choose to be happy.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: home
Posts: 205
Thanks for this post amie - I've been feeling a lot of this lately...Like a zombie disconnected from my feelings and wondering why I'm not happy about the things I used to be happy about. I should start doing some yoga or something to get those positive feelings from exercising.
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Sobriety is different, that's for sure. One of the hardest things to remember I think, is all the crap that we had to go through to get that little bit of "instant happiness." Not only that, but we didn't have to be strong, or working on our own growth, or doing service for others...... We'd just pick up a bottle.
Now we have the opportunity to make it about more than that. We can learn to laugh and cry again, to think of others' needs instead of our own, to endure the tough spots and discover new things. When you think about it, sitting around drinking is much more mundane than sobriety. (We were just too buzzed to notice how mundane it was!)
As far as the meds, it sometimes takes people two or three times to get something that works, so I would definitely share your feelings with the doctor. Think positive - there's something out there just for you!!
Now we have the opportunity to make it about more than that. We can learn to laugh and cry again, to think of others' needs instead of our own, to endure the tough spots and discover new things. When you think about it, sitting around drinking is much more mundane than sobriety. (We were just too buzzed to notice how mundane it was!)
As far as the meds, it sometimes takes people two or three times to get something that works, so I would definitely share your feelings with the doctor. Think positive - there's something out there just for you!!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 2,937
Originally Posted by keithj
i'm pretty sure i can't do it justice.
The other day i was sitting in my office and the building air handlers were shut off for some maintenance. The silence was overwhelming. I have this vague notion that there is a hvac system in the building, but i don't pay much attention to it. It's just a constant source of background noise, that is so familiar that i don't even notice it. Until that background noise is not there anymore.
That's kind of like my life. That constant background noise, underlying current of fear, jealousy, resentment, and self-pity is gone. And i am only aware that it was even there in the first place, when i can recognize the absence of it.
All of the external things are way better, but that's not really what i'm talking about. My life has a sense of purpose today. I can be useful to others. I am responsible to friends and family, to my employer. I'm not plagued by doubt or uncertainty. I don't have regrets or remorse about my past. There isn't a place on earth i can't go and not feel comfortable. I can look the world in the eye and not feel less than or better than anyone. I have a feeling of peace and calmness. I'm not reliant on the actions or opinions of others for my happiness. I have a powerful, deep feeling of gratitude and desire to be helpful to others.
When i got sober, all i wanted was to quit drinking and get my life back. What happened was a completely new life.
The other day i was sitting in my office and the building air handlers were shut off for some maintenance. The silence was overwhelming. I have this vague notion that there is a hvac system in the building, but i don't pay much attention to it. It's just a constant source of background noise, that is so familiar that i don't even notice it. Until that background noise is not there anymore.
That's kind of like my life. That constant background noise, underlying current of fear, jealousy, resentment, and self-pity is gone. And i am only aware that it was even there in the first place, when i can recognize the absence of it.
All of the external things are way better, but that's not really what i'm talking about. My life has a sense of purpose today. I can be useful to others. I am responsible to friends and family, to my employer. I'm not plagued by doubt or uncertainty. I don't have regrets or remorse about my past. There isn't a place on earth i can't go and not feel comfortable. I can look the world in the eye and not feel less than or better than anyone. I have a feeling of peace and calmness. I'm not reliant on the actions or opinions of others for my happiness. I have a powerful, deep feeling of gratitude and desire to be helpful to others.
When i got sober, all i wanted was to quit drinking and get my life back. What happened was a completely new life.
i get it!
I totally get it now!
You explained it so well.
Thanks
xx
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